Concert~

I HAVE A BROTHER!?!

You woke up from a dream. It was about Woohyun cheating on you. You that it will never happended to you. He is so caring and sweet. You then went in the bathroom and then took a warm shower and then changed into a domo shirt and domo sweatpants.

Today was very diffrent for you. You are going to peform at a concert for millions of fans. You then went in the kitchen and went to the dining table and sat down. You were daydreaming about the dream that you had.

-Dream-

You were walking home from the store that unnies told you to buy. You then walk past a alley. You the heard and groaning. You were making a disgested face on yourself when you heard those noisces.

You then heard the girl said "Woohyun...Oppa.." You thought it was a diffrent Woohyun not your boyfriend. You then past the two people and then you started staring at them at disgust.

And then the girl then look at you and said "Do you mind. You are staring at us like you are going to me." You then look at the boy. It was Woohyun. Your boyfriend.

You were suprised that Woohyun was kissing another girl. That isnt you. You then walk up to him. And did a death glare at him. He then said "Well, sorry. I dont like you anymore. I mean I dont LOVE you anymore." You then coundnt take anymore. You then felt something on your cheek. You then touch your cheek.

You were now crying. You then look at Woohyun when more time and then you Slap him across his face. He was also suprised. WE.ARE.OVER! you said to him. You then grab the bags and then started running back to the dorm with tears in your eyes.

You finally arrvied at the dorm and then the unnies went up to your and shouted questions so you could answer them. You then went up to Victoria Unnie and then you started crying louder this time.

All of your unnies were worried. Amber texted Shinee to go to there dorm to see if you were okay. You then about to answer one of the question when Shinee rushed in. And then you black out.

-End of dream-

YAH! you heard someone yelled. You then jumped in suprise. Im sorry unnie. I just had a bad dream. And it keep repeating in my mind. you said to your unnies. They nodded like they understand you.

You then grab your spoon and started eating your breakfast. When you were done you put the dishes in the sink. You were the last one to finshed you breakfast because of the stupid dream.

You then washed the dishes in 15 minutes. When you were done you grab your ipod and went to the dance studio. You were going to get out of stress because of the dream.

You then started from the first song we did and then the last. IT took you about 2 hours. You didnt notice we recorded alot of songs. And that your remember the lyrics and the dance moves.

You then took your ipod and headed back to the dorm. When you arrvied at the dorm you checked the clock. it was about 12pm. You then started making lunch for the unnies and you. You didnt want Amber and Victoria unnie cooking because they work very hard.

When you were done you yelled out " YAH! LUNCH IS READY! " And then 20 seconds later unnies were at the dining table wondering what is for lunch. You then got the food that you made and put it on the table.

When you put it on the table you saw that unnies were drooling because they know that if i cook something it is always perfect and delicous. You then grab the plates and got some of the food that you made and then you put it infornt of the unnies.

You cooked fried rice (without shirmps) and chicken wings. You then grab the cans of coke and give it to the unnies. When you sat down, all the unnies dig in like they are like pigs and that they didnt even eat for months.

Yah! Slow down before you choke! you said. No uhh! We wont! Luna said with a handfun of fried rice in . Oh kay then, if you say then. you said and ate your food. 10 seconds later Luna were choking on the food. You then grab water and handed it to her. I told you. you said.

And then everybody ate in silence and slowly. When you guys were done you wash the dishes again.  Because you wanted to. Since you had nothing to do.You werer finally done and then you took a shower and got a backpack and put a sweatshirt , ipod, and other stuff.

You then heard your phone ringing. You saw the id number and it was Manger oppa. You then said:

You: Hello?

Manger: Get ready. We are getting ready for the concert.

You; I know, I know.

Manger: OF course you do. You need to stop reading those fan fics.

You: Well it is kind of helpful.

Manger: Ohkay,Ohkay. Tell the unnies too! BYE! See ya later~!

And then you hanged up. You were excited and nervouse for the concert. You then told the unnies and they nodded and got a bag and put stuff in it. 10 minutes later we were all ready. Manger oppa was outside waiting with the van.

We then went in and waited to go to M!Countdown. 5 minutes later your guys arrvied. Unnies and you went in and sat down and then the make up people did you guys make up.

1 hour later all you guys were finshed with the make ups now we need to wear the cloths. 10 minutes later you guys were out of then dressing room. You then look at the other unnies and the look pretty and you do to. This is what you guys were wearing:

Victoria:

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Amber:

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Krystal:

krystal_fx___hot_summer_by_serahnette-d3

Luna:

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Sulli:

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You:

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You look so cute with the ears! You really love your outfit! And then unnies too. You cant wait to perform! You were jumping up and down. Until Sulli unnie told me to stop. And i obeyed.

The show started like 30 minutes ago and that you were nervous if you are going to do a wrong move. And then the director went in the fx dressing out of know where and told that we are on next. We then put the mics on us and then we waited for out turn. U-KISS was on right now. You cant belive that they sing very good.

When they finshed they got off and did fighting for us. I was happy that they said fighting because it help me not get nervoruse. The Mc then said our band name and then the music started we then went to the middle of the stage and then did the song. It was Hot Summer.

You sang and you didnt cracked even the unnies didnt did it too! You were happy that you didnt have had any mistakes. And then the song was over and we did a ending pose. Fx was perfect. They did everything right. And then the crowd went wild.

You were happy that the fans like the song. And then another song pop up and we dance to the song. It was Danger. We also did perfect too and the crowd was also more wilder from last time.

And then we bowed and we intordoced to us. " Hello, We are F(x) ! I am Victoria, AMBER, Sulli, Luna, Krystal, and the youngest MINYOUNG~! " Hi! you said and waved at the crowed. We then bowed again and walk off stage.

We then change out of the outfits and makeups and then watched rest of the show. When it was done you told everybody that they did good.! And you also got hugs from some of them.

While you were walking around the buliding saying that they were good. You notice that infinite wasnt at m!countdown. You felt sad without Woohyun. And then your phone vibrated and you notice that it was from victoria unnie. It said that we are going to go out and pary for a good perfomance. You said okay. and then went back if the unnies.

Few hours later-

You guys finally finshed the dinner. It was boring without Woohyun. Unnies and you finally went home. You took a shower and put on a spongebob pj's. And then when you lay your head on your pillow you went to dreamland.

 

 

 

 

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stephanie1138 #1
Chapter 1: Chapter 1: To be frank, I don't really like your writing.
First of all, the characters are boring. They are pratically the same person. They act the same. All of them are nice, good looking and insanely attractive. In short, flawless. It makes your story seems dead. Secondly, you narrate too much. Specifically, you wrote about everything which is very unnecessary. For example, the narration about Minyong's doing in the school. You narrate on her going to school, about her opening the locker, about her being boring in class. You can include them in the story but try to make them less obvious. Don't be too direct. Thirdly, you're making me confused by not sticking to any point of view. At first, you'd addressed Minyoung as 'you' and then as 'I'. It's hard to keep track on who's point of view is it. Because some of the stories out there is written from various characters' point of view.Also, you're using the word 'then' too much in your writing. I see that you try to connect the story using it but you keep repeating it over and over again. Lastly, I don't see the connection of the storyline. It doesn't flow nicely. The plot keep jumping all over the place. Try to be specific in writing the scenario. But don't write too much by writing unnecessary things. You're supposed to make the reader understand what's going on in your story. It able them to visualize the story easily.

Btw, I'm sorry for being harsh with my comment. I'm not trying to bash you with my comment. I just want to point out your flaws in writing so that you can improve them.
You also have your own strengths in writing. What's good about you is your idea. You have a great idea on wrtin it's just that your delivery is still poor. But, it's okay. I know you could improve your writing because I can see your potential as a good writer. I hope you're not going to get hurt by my comment. I'm sorry if my words is too harsh. Thank you and have a nice day.

And congratulations for being featured!
Iminthezone #2
Congrats
agentllama08
#3
Chapter 35: Update please
ShineeLeeJinki
#4
SEQUEL!!
naznew #5
i will read it..
EXOtic123 #6
umm....new reader here. you wrote infinate when its infinite on the foreward and you also used an old u-kiss photo but used the new members name........ but i'll start reading soon^^
unfixed-soul
#7
Sequel because it doesn't make sense to just end it like that.
naznew #8
Gomawo update...
a sequel because you make the story suspended..
LeeMinJi #9
Gomawo for the update :D Sequel please!