Donghae’s POV:

“What are you doing here?”

That sentence kept ringing in my mind. If eyes were meant to speak, I look into hers and all I see was fear. If tears were meant to speak, all I see was her pain. If heart was meant to speak, all I see was her helplessness. Fear, pain, and helplessness. What have she done to deserve these torments? She was cold, really cold. There was no warmth in her voice, her eyes, and her face. The face stained with tear marks, the voice trembling in fear, the eyes speaking thousands of stories behind those pains she tries to hide. I didn’t answer her.

Donghae just walked up to her and stood beside her. With a plastic cup in his hand, he spoke up.

“It’s safer using a plastic cup,” he said calmly and put the cup on the table beside her bed.

Jessica remained quiet. What can she say when the guy she loves so much is doing the sweetest thing for her? If she looks through his eyes, those gaze conveyed words of pain. Not all scars show, not all wounds heal. Sometimes you can't always see the pain that someone feels. They love each other so dearly; they want to take away each other’s pain.

He just sat there to take care of her. With a warm smile, he just stares at her.

“How do I even chase you away when you are my life?” she thought as she swallows away the tears, bit by bit.

“Leave,” the only thing she said. With that, he just goes on smiling. With the remaining strength he had left, he put on his best smile. Look through those smiles to see only his pain and worry. Look through those smiles to see that he don’t know how to leave her. He doesn’t, for he doesn’t know how to take away his life. Nobody knows how badly she wants to reach out to him; nobody knows how much he has to tell her; nobody knows how much she misses him; nobody know how much he misses her; nobody knows how badly they wanted each other.

“I SAID LEAVE!” gathering the last bit of her strength, she shouted. By saying that, it was no difference from using a knife to stab him and her.

“Do you love me?” He asked. That husky voice that clouded by his tears rang.

Jessica’s POV:

I love you. I love you so much and that’s why I’m doing all this. I love you and I’m giving you the easier way out. Because it’s easier for you to leave than to stay and bear these pains you never deserved; because it’s easier for you to see me strong than to see through me to feel my pain.

Of course I love you, so much more than I ever thought I could.

I look away. I look away before my tears can betray me. I look away before I soften my stand. Because I can’t stay firm against him; because I can’t betray my inner feelings.

“I…I don’t.”

I feel like the world has stopped. I feel like I had lost my sanity. I betrayed the deepest feeling in my heart as I lied to the man I love the most. I’ve hurt him, but I promise, it’ll be the last time. Oppa, after this, nobody will hurt you anymore. I promise. But why does my heart hurt so much? Why does it feel like it’s splitting into pieces that I can no longer piece back. Why is it hurting me this much when I’m making you leave, as though it’s taking away the whole of me? Falling in love with me was the greatest mistake in your life.

Does she know that with that sentence, his heart shattered into millions of pieces? She’s hurting, and so is he. The only reason for these pains is because they love each other too much.

“Why did you save me?”

It was a complete silence in the room. All you could hear was the perfect beating of two hearts crushing into pieces. A tear dropped onto her hand. And at that very moment, she can no longer hold back those tears. She looked up into his eyes, to see him tearing from all the hurtful things she had stupidly done. Those tears told her how much he loves her, how much pain she had brought upon him. She knew, she knew that since the first day they met, it was impossible for them to leave one another. And for that, her tears fall uncontrollably, as though it has been accumulated for years. Those tears on their faces, spoke the words that