“You look punctured.” Yeeun looked up as Onew handed her a cup of tea. She smiled wistfully. “How’s the construction coming along?”

She rubbed her temples. “It’s being constructed. I’m only here for another three months and then I have that project in Hong Kong. I’ll be flying back and forth.” She sighed. “Jetlag is going to be my best friend.”

Onew chuckled. “And everything else?” Yeeun sipped her tea quietly. “Yeeun, you said you’d have it figured out in a month. It’s been more than that.”

 “I know.”

 “Have you talked to him?”

 “Of course I have. He’s my husband.”

He shook his head. “I mean talk.”

 “I know what you mean, Jinki. It’s difficult for the both of us. We’re a working household, we hardly have time to eat let alone properly talk,” said Yeeun as her finger circled the rim of her mug. The click of the front door interrupted their conversation.

Jessica walked through, surprised at the other person in the room. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know you had a guest. Hello, Yeeun,” she greeted. Onew got up and gave her a kiss on the cheek. “I’ll be in the kitchen.”

 “Jessica, don’t mind me. I’m waiting for my ride to the airport so I should be gone in twenty minutes or so. Please, sit down,” said Yeeun, shifting herself on the couch. Jessica sat down gingerly. Her eyes passed from the other woman to her boyfriend. “It’s been a while since we met hasn’t it?”

 “Since I came back,” nodded Jessica. “And you’re doing well?”

Yeeun smiled. “As well as I can be. Work has been crazy and it being the only female in the team.”

 “I’m sure you get to call all the shots.”

 “Definitely,” laughed Yeeun. Her phone rang and she answered it as she got up to get her coat. Yeeun turned to find the couple pulling faces at each other. “Well then, I guess I can leave you two in good hands.”

Jessica blushed.  “Have a safe flight, Yeeun. Ring us when you’re back.”

“Of course,” said Yeeun with a smile. “Onew, thank you so much, I owe you big time. Your boyfriend’s been great company and even took care of me after a drunken night. I miss that mean breakfast you make, Jinki.” Jessica’s face darkened but her smile remained although forced. “I’ll be back soon. Don’t miss me too much!”

What was supposed to be a joyful farewell was replaced with a dampened atmosphere. Jessica walked away first, silently heading back to the living room.

 “Nothing happened.”

 “I didn’t ask.”

Onew stopped her when he reached for her arm. “I just want you to know.”

 “OK. She was drunk. And you took care of her. End of.” Deep down, Jessica had a dozen questions. Why? What happened? Why? And more whys. But she didn’t want to risk it. She was afraid of the possible answers. “Onew. She slept over. It was just one night.”

He remained in the same spot. Jessica’s heart froze and she closed her eyes, and opened them to find the world glassy. She turned around and he was looking at the floor.

 “It was more than once?” Her voice quivered.

Onew heaved a sigh. “She was working late and she was too scared to go home alone. I had just come back from an office party and I was drunk. I let her spend the night. But I swear I stayed at Sunny’s. All the time.”

 “You know I hate it when you drink too much.” He did know. He’d never seen Jessica so angry and stern as she was when he got drunk. It was like this other side of her that came out. “You wanted me to know but you couldn’t tell me before?” It felt like her worst nightmare had come to life. As if it had pressed rewind and played itself. “Any other times that I don’t know about, like the days you had cancelled our calls because you were too busy. Were you busy with her then?”

 “Jessica, that’s not-“

 “Were you ever going to tell me if she hadn’t slipped it out just now?”

Onew raised his head and looked at her in the eye. “I should’ve told you earlier but I didn’t want you to worry.”

 “I trust you, Onew. If you had just told me, I would have believed you.”

 “I know, but it wasn’t even a big deal and there was so much going on with her and her marriage,” explained Onew. He touched her wrist and carefully wrapped his hand around it. “And you, you’ve been off lately. I didn’t want to make it worse.”

Jessica snapped, “I’m fine, Onew.”

 “You’re not. You’ve been distant and uneasy about something and I don’t know what it is but you’re hiding it from me. Something’s wrong.”

 “There’s nothing wrong. What is wrong is you not telling me the first girl you fell in love with stayed over at your house multiple times!”

He shook his head. “I told you, I wasn’t here.”

 “Then end of discussion.” She snatched her hand away from him and sat herself on the couch as he placed himself beside her.

 “Talk to me, Jessica. What’s going on with you?” he asked cautiously. Jessica’s head spun as the nightmares that came every night reran. She shook her head as she sobbed again. “I can’t help you if you don’t tell me. Talk to me, Jessica. Tell me.”

 “I can’t.” She wiped her face and looked at him again. “I can't.”

***

 “Ah, a 5 star room is what I need,” said Jonghyun as he threw himself on to the bed. “I can’t believe we’re spending two nights here. She’s missing out.”

 “Shut up, Jonghyun! Yeeun wouldn’t have come anyway,” said Onew.

 “Someone is pissed.”

Onew peered at his friend and listened. Though it was faint, one could hear the voices loud and clear through the walls. “The man needs to tone it down. His friend must be getting an earful.”

 “And a lot more. He keeps shouting,” answered Jonghyun with his ear pressed to the wall. Onew walked over and did the same. The sound of glass breaking caused the two males’ eyes to widen.

 “You stupid little ! Get up!”

Jonghyun’s mouth dropped open. “I don’t think it’s man to man,” he said worriedly. The shouts got louder and Onew could stand no more. “Hyung, what are you doing?”

 “Hello, is this the reception? Yes, I’m calling to complain about some disturbances from Room 705. If you don’t mind, would you please check? No, that would be all. Thank you.” Onew placed the phone back into its holder and pressed his ear against the wall, silently praying for someone to end the fiasco next door.

Jonghyun treaded quietly to the door and peered through the eye-hole. “The hotel dude just left. Man, whoever that was needs to keep it in a little more." He tried hard to listen. “There’s no screaming or anything breaking so far. What a way to end the day. I’m so tired right now, the last thing I need is a lovers spat.”

 “You’re telling me, I haven’t had a decent night’s sleep in a week.” Finally assuring him that next door was all calm, Onew headed off for a shower.

He wished he could knock off to bed like Jonghyun had but the sleepiness had somehow disappeared. As he sat by the balcony under the cool night sky, he could only think about one person. Yeeun.

She finally left Korea. Without a goodbye but a simple message she passed on to Sunye. When he’d see her next, he didn’t know.

The tiny sniffles caught his ears and he turned toward the sound.

 “I don’t know how much more I can take.” She was on the phone. “But I can’t leave him. I can’t. H-he needs me.” Pause. “I love him. And he l-loves me, I know he does. It’s just the stress.” His neighbour wept. “OK, I’ll just check on him and I’ll see you downstairs.”

Onew could hear her feet shuffling to leave. “Excuse me, miss.” The shuffling stopped. “Hi, I couldn’t help overhearing earlier. I know I shouldn’t be poking around where it’s not my business. I hope you’re not badly hurt.” He paused and shifted closer to the wall that separated them. “No man or woman deserves to be needed if you’re treated that way. I hope you’re strong enough to decide what’s right.”

And with the faintest voice, he heard her. “Thank you.”

Her footsteps left him at the balcony, alone and wondering.

***

 “Where the hell did my stash go? You’ve taken it haven’t you!” Her body touched the cold hard floor as he flung her. “Find me my ing bottle now!” He threw the glass and it shattered into pieces, piercing her body in multiple places. “You stupid little ! Get up!”

Jessica struggled to her feet, her chest heaving with deep breaths. “Donghae, please, please don’t-“

His hand slapped her across the face. “You’re a cheap ! I’ve seen you with that hotel boy of yours.” He grabbed her wrist and tightened his grip until she winced painfully. The bell rang and Donghae released her with a grunt to answer it.

 “Excuse me, sir, but we have a complaint from one of your neighbouring rooms saying there has been some sort of disturbance. We just wanted to make sure.”

Donghae grinned widely. “I’m a regular guest; surely you know more than I do how I abide by the rules. I’m sure the guest is mistaken.” He reached into his back pocket and retrieved a few bills of money. “Why don’t you bring up some red wine for me eh? The fiancée and I are, you know, enjoying the evening sky.”

 “Of course. I apologise for interrupting, sir.”

Jessica whimpered as she heard the door close. Don’t go. Come back, please. She wanted to tell the bellboy to not bring anymore alcohol. No more red wine. No more liquor. He’ll go back to this.

 “Did you set that up with your pesky little friend? Is he in the room next door?” She shook her head, weeping. Her arm was bleeding. He took one look and as if a switch had gone on, his face suddenly changed into one that was worried. “Oh, baby, your arm. It's bleeding. Get a towel, quick!” With her trembling feet she stumbled to the bathroom and returned with a cold, wet towel. Donghae pressed it gently against her arm, softly blowing on the wound. She pulled her arm away but his hand kept it in place. “I’m sorry, Jessica. I’m sorry. I don’t want to hurt you.”

 “I know,” she whispered. His lips found hers and he kissed her. His lips felt hard and cold, no longer the soft and gentle kisses she was used to before. He kissed the cuts on her arm and dragged her to the bed, finally settling the both of them in a cuddle. Within minutes, he was asleep, the obvious alcohol and previous anger tiring him out. She carefully eased herself out of his arms and went out the room.

She pressed ‘1’ on her phone and listened to the dial tone.

 “Jess?”

 “He threw a glass today.”

 “Jess, how badly hurt are you?” asked Doojoon restlessly. “Do you need to go to the emergency room?”

 “No, no, no I’ve only got a few minor cuts.”

He sighed heavily. “A few minor cuts is still something.”

 “I don’t know how much more I can take.” She cried, sobbing quietly.

 “Jessica, all you have to do is leave. Walk out that door and leave him; I’ll be there to take you,” said Doojoon. "I'll be here."

 “But I can’t leave him. I can’t. H-he needs me,” spluttered Jessica. Her heart ached. It ached for Donghae and for the pain and love she felt for him. “I love him. And he l-loves me, I know he does. It’s just the stress.”

Doojoon could argue no more. In the time he’d known Jessica, she was stubborn. “Where is he now? Asleep?” She sniffled in response. “Let’s go to our usual place. In say five minutes?”

 “OK, I’ll just check on him and I’ll see you downstairs.”

She felt a little better. Knowing that she would be seeing Doojoon, the one person she could confide her troubled life with, without being judged. She turned to leave when a voice stopped her.

 “Excuse me miss.” His voice was soothing as faint as it was. “Hi, I couldn’t help overhearing earlier. I know I shouldn’t be poking around where it’s not my business. I hope you’re not badly hurt.” It must’ve been him that called the reception. Her heart jumped gratefully. He continued speaking. “No man or woman deserves to be needed if you’re treated that way. I hope you’re strong enough to decide what’s right.”

closed up, trying to prevent the burst of tears. How could a random stranger say something that touched her heart so warm? She had no words other than, “Thank you.”

***

Donghae, no! No, don’t please, it hurts! Don’t!

She woke up in a sweat. As she always did recently. The terrors came to her in her sleep and it all felt so real. She reached over to her bedside table for her phone. Her finger hovered over the ‘1’ button. Instead her phone lit up with an unfamiliar number.

 “Hello?” She picked up.

 “I hope I’m not disturbing your beauty sleep.” Her body went cold as the familiar voice seeped through her ears. “You know, tomorrow would have been our third year anniversary if we had married.”

 “How the hell did you get my number?” asked Jessica icily.

 “I am Lee Donghae, are you doubting my connections? Tsk tsk, Jessica, you’re losing it.”

 “What do you want?”

 “Nothing. I don’t want anything because I have everything. I’m calling to inform you that tomorrow I’ll be heading over to the SM headquarters and believe it or not, a familiar name cropped up. I don’t suppose you know a Mr. Lee Jinki by any chance do you?” Jessica’s breathing hitched. He cackled when he knew he’d hit the jackpot. “What a thrill I’ll be having tomorrow.”

 “Stop your childish games, Donghae.”

 “Oooh, still feisty I see. Well, I thought it’d be interesting, the meeting of the ex-fiancé and the current boyfriend. I wonder how he’ll feel about that.” When she didn’t answer, Donghae smiled. “He doesn’t know about our engagement, does he? Why is that, hmm?”

 “Stop it-“

 “Is it because you’re too scared to tell him, afraid he might leave you?” He took a breath. “Because I would too if I had as much baggage as you do. You’re a cheat.”

 “You are a miserable idiot, Donghae. You can say all you want, but what I have with Onew is something you will never have.”

 “Ah, but that’s where you are wrong, my dear. He has one thing that I want.”

Jessica snarled, “And what’s that?”

 “You.”

***

I know, a super late update. I'm sorry! Hope this will make up for it. Very excited for the many comebacks! A little sad about the 'Why So Serious?' MV though. No Jjong :'( Get well soon, baby. SHINee, my beautiful Secret girls and f(x) sometime soon I hope. Anddddd, Taemin and Naeun's WGM on Saturday! YEAY YEAY! Anyway, thank you for being so patient! Big love to my subscribers, mwah :)