“Oh, Hyerim-ah, okay, I understand.” I nod as if Hyerim is talking in front of me now before hanging up the call. Then I bow to the aunty who owns the shop before opening the shop door, “Thank you, ahjumma!” The fresh air of spring brushes my face. I realize, I need to do this kind of thing once in a week. It’s refreshing.

     My right hand holds a paper bag full of fruits and vegetables. Tonight Dujun oppa is going to visit my home so I decide to make a big feast. I want to make anything possible for him to eat. To think about it, I have been apart from him for years, and during my childhood he was like my own big brother. Even making ten parties aren’t enough to celebrate our reunion. Unluckily, Hyerim can’t come home this night. She says she needs to take care something on her brother’s place. But, the good news is I can spend the night with my only Dujun oppa. I have been anticipating it. Meeting someone that I know seems will help me a lot to forget all the things that happen –Minseok, Lu Han, EXO, Vic.

    I am about to go to the meat shop next to the vegetable shop when suddenly someone grabs my left hands. I look up, to just jerk his grip on mine. He looks at me intensely. I avoid his eyes before opening the meat shop door. I hear his footsteps after me. He follows me. I sigh.

    “I can only follow you if you go out from your freaking home.” He speaks when the butcher smiles towards me. I can see he lowers his snapback so that his eyes almost get covered as well, like his half face which is covered by mask. The butcher eyes him for a second before asking me what kind of meat that I need. I tell him what I need before he starts to prepare the meat that I want.

    There are various kinds of meats here. I look at them, fascinating. Ribs, tenderloin, sirloin. Start from pork, lamb, and beef. For a while I forget that he is still standing beside me. I walk to the side where the meat being displayed when I bump into him. I look up, gaze him, annoyed. Move aside. I glare at him before he moves to the side so that I can continue my sight-seeing to the meats.

    “What is so interesting from these meats? It’s not like they are dolls, or –”

    Shut up. I speak in my mind.

    “Why are you doing this to me?” He protests.

    I am not asking you to be here with me. I thought.

    “Miss, this is your meat.” The butcher hands me the meat and I hurriedly pay it before making my way to the crowd market again. I prefer a traditional market than a supermarket to do grocery shopping. I can see aunts who sell vegetables or, uncles who walk on the street with jackets on. They look normal. They look like people who live their life worrying nothing –talking and chattering to each other. By looking at them, Korea feels like home for me. When I was a child mom brought me to the market a lot. It’s probably just a habit. Or, maybe I am weird, but this is the way I can reduce my anxiety inside my mind.

    “I should help you.” I jolt when realizing someone talks to my side and in a lightning speed the voice owner takes the paper bag full of vegetables and fruits from my right hand. I scrunch my nose before lock my eyes on his,

     “Yah Kim Minseok, what’s wrong with you???!!!” I yelp. I don’t care if people start to stare at us. I try to take the paper bag from his embrace when he holds it higher above his head. I tiptoe, in hope I can be higher than his chest, so that I can grab the paper bag. But, it’s a fail. “I hate you.” I say before walking again