Apology Accepted
Let Me In
A few days passed since you had gotten that letter from Luhan and you were still not sure about what to do.
You were in a dilemma. You wanted to forgive the boy but at the same time, you didn’t. He had hurt you so much so you contemplated whether he really deserved your forgiveness.
You also wondered whether he was really being sincere in that letter. I mean, sure, it was literally written word by word on paper and sealed in and envelope but…you know, it could just be an act.
But something deep inside of you was telling you that you should forgive him.
Is it okay to accept someone’s apology but still hate them for what they did? No, that doesn’t make sense, does it?
“I don’t know what to do!” You sighed aloud in your bedroom on a Saturday night.
Five seconds later, there was a knock on your door. It opened and Baekhyun poked his head inside with a concerned look.
“Are you alright in there?”
“Just fine,” you said and laid back down on your bed and faced the ceiling.
“Sure you are. That’s why you keep sighing and punching poor Beary,” He said as he took your huge stuffed bear and smoothed him out. “Now tell me, what’s bothering you?” Baekhyun asked but actually, he already knew.
Chen had told him about the letter the day after you had received it. He knew that you wouldn’t want him to know about it, but he’s your brother. And since Baekhyun already knew about the whole you-dating-Luhan-again-behind-his-back thing, he figured it wouldn’t hurt telling him about the letter as well.
You sat up and took Beary back into your arms and hugged him tight. “It’s nothing,” you said. But you didn’t sound the least bit convincing.
Baekhyun nodded, “Alright. If you don’t want to tell me about it now, you know you can always find me whenever you want to right?” He took you hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze.
“Don’t worry, you’ll figure out what to do,” he smiled. “You’re a big girl now.”
You looked up at him and gave him a soft smile, “Thank you, Baek oppa.”
“No problem.” Baekhyun stood up and went out of the room after giving you one last glance.
*
“Where are you going?” Chen asked when you were walking in the direction opposite of the cafeteria.
It was lunch time on the following Monday and class had just ended. Minyoung had stayed back to talk to the teacher about something and told you and Chen to go on ahead first. You did as she said but you didn’t have any plans on going to the cafeteria in the first place.
“I’m going to the rooftop,” you said like it was the most normal thing to do.
“Rooftop?” Chen’s eyebrows furrowed. “What for?”
“I’m going to see Luhan,” you said. “I’m going to tell him what I’ve decided to do after reading the letter and having time to think about it.”
Chen grew worried. What if Luhan hurt you again? What if Luhan does something that makes you fall for him again?
He couldn’t afford that. No way. Not after he has finally broken down your wall and he is just this close to you being his. Well, that’s what he thinks anyway.
“Do you need me to go with you?” Chen offered.
You gave him a small but reassuring smile. “No need. I’ve got this covered,” you said. “Besides, I think it’s better if I told him this without anyone looking at him like he’s going to kill him.”
Chen chuckled when he realised you were talking about him. “Okay. Call me if anything happens, okay? I’ll run up there.”
“I will,” you nodded and turned around to continue walking in the direction of the stairs where the rooftop access was.
Earlier that day, you had slipped a note into Luhan’s locker just before you met up with the others like you usually did in the morning.
Meet me at the rooftop during lunch, yeah? I have something to tell you.
Haerin
That’s what you had written on the note.
You didn’t know if Luhan had seen it, to be honest. He probably did, since you did slip it into his locker.
A few minutes later, you panted as you reached the top of the stairs. “Man, I really need to start laying off on those pizza and ice cream.” You said to yourself but you knew you weren’t going to do any of that.
You opened the door to the roof and stepped outside.
It was a sunny day but it was still a bit chilly. “Fall’s definitely nearing,” you whispered to no one in particular. You wrapped your arms around yourself and tried to keep warm.
“Haerin, I’m here.” You heard a voice behind you and turned around. Luhan was standing a few feet away from you and you could see that he was hesitating to take another step closer to you.
“Hey,” You gave him a small smile.
“Hey,” he replied.
The two of you stood there in awkward silence before he broke it. “You wanted to tell me something?”
“Yes, I do.” You inhaled and exhaled. “I read your letter,” you said.
Luhan stiffened. He had predicted that you wanted to talk about the letter and on the way up here, he was preparing himself to what he was going to hear from you. He expected bad news.
But when you had said the four words, he figured that he didn’t do enough preparing.
Luhan stayed quiet while he waited for you to continue speaking.
“Thank you…for apologizing. And for telling me the truth,” you said. “I appreciate that. I don’t hate you anymore and I forgive you-”
Luhan’s face brightened when you said that and he opened his mouth to say something. But his face turned dark again when you continued to speak.
“-But I don’t think I can be your friend.”
He felt his world crashing down when he heard that. But inside, he kept telling himself that he deserved this.
“I forgive you because…I’m never really the type to hold grudges. I usually just let it go but I’ll never forget what happened,” you said. “I loved you, Luhan. I really did. But you broke my heart – twice. Purposely or not.”
Luhan cringed at the past tense of ‘love’.
“Although I’ve said that I don’t hate you, I still don’t exactly like you, you know? You did some bad things to me and I’m still in the process of recovering from it.”
You softened when you saw Luhan trying to hold back his tears.
“I’m sorry,” you said.
“N-no. I’m sorry. You have nothing to apologize for.” Luhan managed to say but in a soft voice.
“And it’s okay. I understand. I deserve this.” He said. “But I’ll be fine.” He looked up and met your eyes and gave you a small smile.
“You’re a great girl, Haerin-ah. You definitely deserve someone who will treat you right. And you already have that person by your side.” He smiled again. “Thank you, for forgiving me. And…I’ll just see you around.”
Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion. What is he talking about?
You were about to ask him to explain what he had just said but he had already disappeared behind the door.
*
You still had fifteen minutes to go till the bell rang for lunch break to be over so you quickly went down from the rooftop to the cafeteria but decided that you wouldn’t be able to eat.
“Hey guys,” you greeted as you took your seat in between Kai and Baekhyun.
You looked around the table and realised that everyone had finished eating. Well, except for Chen since he still had a nicely wrapped sandwich sitting on his tray but he didn’t seem to be eating it.
“Where in the world have you been for the past forty-five minutes?” Kai asked as he poked your shoulder.
“Just, somewhere.” You said and smacked his hand so that he would stop poking you. “Oh man, I’m starving but there’s only ten minutes left,” you pouted.
“Here, eat this,” Chen said as he placed the untouched sandwich in front of you.
You looked up and waved your hands. “Oh no no, this is yours. You eat it.”
“Take it. It’s yours,” he said. “I got an extra sandwich for you since I figured you’d come for lunch late.” Chen smiled his gorgeous smile and you felt your cheeks flush pink.
“Thanks,” you said and went on to unwrap the sandwich.
“Aw, so sweet! Chen oppa’s so sweet!” Kai teased in a high-pitched voice.
You turned to him and gave him a look. “What are you doing?”
“Can’t you tell? I’m saying your thoughts for you and imitating you at the same time,” he smirked.
You rolled your eyes and smacked his arm again. But this time, harder. “I don’t sound like that!”
A/N: sorry for the late update guys!!
I woke up past noon then I watched Running Man 188 and Once Upon A Time (it's an american tv series) before updating this
SPEAKING OF RUNNING MAN 188, KIM WOO BIN IS JUST PERFECT. HE DOESN'T EVEN HAVE TO DO ANYTHING AND HE'S ALREADY THAT ATTRACTIVE LIKE DAYUMZ
And I also definitely think that Jihyo is mad cause she didn't get to go ride helicopters, ride that truck thing, go diving, see kangaroos and koalas and go to such a beautiful house that the PDs got for RM people.
And oh god, the house was b e a u t i f u l i want to go there and have it all for myself. ;_;
I'm just gonna say that in my bucket list, i have
1. migrate to australia
2. get a house by the beach
'nuff said.
hehe anywyas i hope ya'll enjoy the chapter! lav u guys <3
XO,
asdfghjklex
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