"I'm going to sue you." TOP said half seriously and half I'm not sure what. His wide eyes opened widely and then focused on me as he squinted.
          "Hyung, at least it didn't kill you." Daesung said as he leaned against the white hospital bed rail. His ash blondish hair hung low over his tired eyes.
   It was now 12 am and finally TOP's shoulder had been treated. Apparently the fall of the heavy ball broke his right shoulder bone, so he now sported a cast and an arm sling.
       "Sorry, on your birthday and everything." I said awkwardly to Daesung, looking down at my feet.
       "Ah don't worry about it. We still had a lot of fun." Daesung smiled kindly with his lips tightened.
  Ahhhh.. I never liked the hospital. Why was it that I always somehow found a way back here?
        "Like I said, Mianhae*." I eyed TOP who was getting ready to stand up from the white bed.
        "It's fine. I guess it happens." He mumbled.
~~~~~~~~~~
      It was not fine. TOP's movie promotion was supposed to begin this week yet he had a broken shoulder. How the hell was he supposed to explain that?
That someone dropped a bowling ball on him? How stupid does that sound?

       But thankfully, the YG entertainment company came out with an official statement giving a better reason for his broken shoulder.
For the next two weeks, I mainly spent time just working and staying at his house. TOP was getting really busy due to his movie promotions as well as magazine interviews and so I was mostly home alone, with Charlie of course.
        I never realized how popular TOP really was. Probably because I lived with him and had to see and work with him everyday, it never hit me. But then when I turned the tv on, I would see him in front of crowds of thousands of people in promotion events, on celebrity shows and interviews and in movie trailers.
Was he really that famous..?
     He looked equally as handsome as he did in real life. His sharp features and tall fit body that really named him as a movie star.
I was shopping at the local department store looking for a few things when I found one of his movies in the film section.
      "The commitment." I picked it off the shelf and looked at the cover. I had never seen his movies before...
      "That's a really good movie, I recommend it!" A store employee came by and smiled at me.
"Oh really?" I asked as I flipped the DVD case to look at the back.
       "The main character is actually played by Bigbang's TOP, he's very handsome and good in this one." She said to me with a bright face.
 Explode with happiness already, will ya?
      Back off , your breath stinks, I wanted to say.
      "TOP huh? Never heard of him." I said cooly as I dropped the DVD case in my shopping basket and walked away.
I got home via the bus and quickly settled into the couch to watch the movie.
45 minutes in, I was completely into it. My eyes were glued on the screen and every time TOP spoke, I felt a shiver go down my spine. Damn...he's good. But it was cheesy as hell. Why did he play such a serious role??
        I heard the front door open and close as someone stepped inside onto the marble floor. I looked at the time...12:45 am. Geez, do those magazine journalists hold him down or something?
        "Hey." I stretched my head backwards to look at him.
TOP looked ridiculously tired but still deviously handsome just as always. His clear eyes looked deeply set in and his lips looked as if they were going to crumble down. 
He slowly came over and collapsed on the couch next to me. TOP leaned on his back and began to undo his tie with his hand that didn't have the broken shoulder.
On the inside, I did feel really bad. The way he looked so dead tired and also having to deal with a painful broken shoulder.
        He cracked a little smile as he saw himself on the wide flat screen tv. "Who's that handsome guy?"
       
  I scoffed and lowered the volume. "I just wanted to see how good of an actor you were."
      He picked up the DVD case that was on the granite coffee table. "Why did you buy this? I have the director's copy right down there." He pointed to the tall DVD rack by the tv.
      Right. Why did I buy this? He was the main actor in the movie, duh he was going to have a copy of it.
 TOP didn't say much more and then tried to lay down comfortably on the couch. 
His head was just a few centimeters from my . That was all that I realized.
He closed his tired eyes and let his hand rest over them. I could see his well defined neck and just a tiny bit of his chest from his loosened tie and the few buttons that were undone at the top. His steady and soft breathing seemed innocent in a way how his perfectly shaped lips opened ever so slightly. 
   For the next ten minutes, I didn't watch the movie. Instead, I watched him. As creepy as that sounds.
I tightened my lips and tried so hard not to make a loud sound when ever I swallowed.
      How was he so...perfect looking? His long lush lashes lining the edge of his delicate looking eyes. That nose and those lips that were so amazingly still even as he breathed. 
I unknowingly leaned towards him until he suddenly spoke.
      "So...are you going?" He said in his rich dark voice. TOP's eyes opened half way.
       "Huh..?" I immediately pulled back and leaned back hard on the couch.
       TOP hesitated a little before speaking again. "The..blind date." He blinked a couple of times as if he were thinking to himself.
       Right. The date. I had actually told Junhwa that I didn't want to go...but then again, now that I thought about it. There was no reason for me not to go.
       "O-Oh, that. Um...yea, I'm going." I spoke before my mind even decided.
        "Really?"
        "Yeah, I thought I didn't want to go but...why the hell not, right?" I nervously laughed, trying not to look at TOP.
        He didn't say anything for a while and closed his eyes.
Why wasn't he saying anything? Was he thinking about this or something?
And then I realized he was asleep. The way his broad chest moved slowly up and down every time he took a sweet breath through the small slip between his lips.
     I grabbed a blue furry blanket from beside the couch and covered him with it so that he wouldn't be cold.
     Hmm.. I really wonder what he's thinking about all the time.

~~~~~~~~~~~
    I knew that I was never going to get a second date if I went looking like my usual self. I knew I needed some help. Some girly help.
     As much as I hate to downgrade myself, I had to admit, I wasn't very attractive to a guy's eye. I dressed mostly in skater clothing, mainly because it was comfortable and it fit me and my personality. I wasn't a bright and bubbly attention seeker but more of a stay in the background and try not to get noticed type of person.
      "This year's trends....what to wear on a first date....what guys like...On a blind date, most guys tend to look forward to seeing a...cute girl." I mumbled out loud what I read from my phone. I was trying to find some sort of article that would give tips for a date. After all...it was literally my FIRST date.
The thought of meeting a guy and the possibility of him become my boyfriend made me sick yet excited at the same time. All during my school years, I didn't have the time or money to be anyone's girlfriend. And I had no game either.
I mean, it wasn't like I could date TOP or anything right??
      I shook my head at the thought. TOP being a...b-boyfriend? That would be hell! We wouldn't stop arguing!
I sat up straight in the lounge couch on the studio floor. How was it that not many people were at the YG building on weekends?
     I looked around at the empty green led lighted hall and got back to thinking to myself.
But then again...he wasn't that bad of a guy.

He was really funny sometimes despite his serious and quietness. And he did care about people that he liked. The members of bigbang...Charlie and...Eunsuh.
    I laughed stupidly to myself, "I-I could never be his girlfriend!"
    "Whose girlfriend?" I heard a voice right in front of me.
A nice pretty soft one. I flinched when I realized that Remi was standing right in front of me.
    I put my phone down and uncomfortably sat back into the couch. "Oh hey...Remi." I awkwardly said.
      "Hi Raena." She said somewhat emotionlessly and sat down next to me. Her flawlessly sleek hair fell down over her shoulder as she leaned down to adjust her shoes. Her tummy was already getting big, but still barely noticeable due to her overall skinny figure.
      "Who were you talking about? Being who's girlfriend?" Remi's lips curled into a questioning smile as she tucked her hair behind her ear.
      "U-Um..it's nothing. I'm just reading something online so um what brings you to here? I thought Jiyong oppa was in Paris right now." I quickly tried to change the subject.
      Remi squinted her pretty eyes and sighed out a deep breath. "I'm just here to...talk to sajangnim about something."
Despite her soft smile, there was still a bit of worry and sadness in her eyes. I could see her trying so hard to fight it yet it was so clear that there was something on her mind.
      "Is there something...wrong?" I asked cautiously.

      "You know I used to work here..." Remi said as she exhaled. She placed her hand over her stomach and looked around.
      "Really? I thought you work for that magazine company now, with your friend or something."
      "Yeah but 'used to'. I was an Enguhlishi teacher for those five goofballs. Had no idea what I was getting into." Remi scoffed as her eyes traced the ground.
       "But isn't it good now? You're getting married next month and you're pregnant." I said with a bright voice trying to sound happy for her.
       She ran her fingers through her hair and smoothed out some strands. "Yeah it's unbelievable and..amazing. But some people...just don't know when to stop."
      Some people...?
 I frowned because I had no clue what she was talking about.
       "Ever since people knew about my relationship with Jiyong oppa....some of the fans created a hate group. I've been doing a good job ignoring them but it's getting too hard now." Remi genuinely looked terrified and sad at the same time.
      "What...did they do?" I was afraid to ask.
      "You really don't watch the news do you?" Remi smiled a little with her worried eyebrows. "I was seeing Jiyong oppa off at the airport and a few people began throwing eggs at me. He tried to cover me and ended up getting egged himself. Turns out some of the eggs weren't eggs...they were rocks."
   Who in the right mind would try to grow rocks at a pregnant person? I began to feel sick.
      "They've been getting worse and stalking me around. They've sent hate mail, tried to attack my friends and spread rumors about me online. It's it's not even fair!" Remi collapsed her face into her hands and sighed deeply. She looked up at me with disbelief, "They spread stupid crap about me saying how I did it with every guy on campus. I was a English major! I read Shakespeare for fun for god sakes."
     Woah...that's really... I ran out of words to say.
     "I'm going to see if I can talk to Sajangnim about giving Jiyong oppa some time off so we can stay in Japan for a while. And file some restraining orders." Remi rolled her eyes and shook her head as if she was trying to shake the stress off her mind.
      "Don't worry. Everything....will get better." I awkwardly tried to console her. I was never good at consoling. Never.
      Remi sniffed and smiled at me with hope sparkling in her eyes.
How was she able to smile when she was so stressed? It was amazing how someone could be so...strong.
      "If you need any help with anything, I'll be there." I said with a tight grin.
Huh Moon Raena? Since when were you so friendly? I felt surprised myself.

       "Thanks Raena, and I'll definitely help you whenever you need anything." 
      She stood up to go leave for upstairs after we said goodbye.
"Uh actually R-Remi!" I yelled out after her.
         I took a deep breath, "I think I will need your help for something."
       Remi raised her eyebrows, "Hmm?"
      "Um..can you help me...look.." I hesitated before saying what I wanted to say.
Do it. Say it!
       I cleared my throat. "..c-cute?"