My feet scurried off without any more thought. The rain blinded my eyes but the hell with it. I didn't care.
     With each stride that I took, rainwater splashed up on my legs, hitting me with every force to hold name back but I kept running.
The road was fairly empty and dark but there were still a few people walking around.
    Why are they just standing there?!
My lungs collapsed when I saw him. His beautiful golden fur soaked wet to the bone with bits of grounded asphalt coating his paws. There were no huge physical injuries but it was obvious that Charlie had been hit by a car or something. Probably internal bleeding. His small head looked limp with zero strength but his marble eyes were half open lifelessly. 
       "C-Charlie..." My lungs strained to push out the name. Everything. The rain, the dark dusky clouds and the blurry street lights began to all fuse together in some sort of dizzying blob.
I shook my head rapidly to get my head together. My hands shook as they cautiously went down to touch him. But I was scared.
Why wasn't he moving?!
     "C-Charlie...boy w-what's wrong with you?!" My voice trembled violently as I stumbled to figure out what to do.
My phone! I rapidly shoved my hands into my pockets to pull out my phone but it was completely waterlogged by the rain water.
My mouth opened but the words couldn't quite make it out. 

               I can't call anyone...
I quickly tried to look around but most people were already leaving the area. It was getting late so many of the stores were closed.
WHAT DO I DO?
        Then I remembered, there was an veterinary clinic close to this street, just about four blocks away.
       "Charlie! D-Don't worry, it's okay! You'll b-be okay!" My voice was breathless and husky. The rain pounding on my back was cold and demeaning, as if it were trying to keep me pinned down.
I couldn't tell if I was even crying because of the relentless rain streaming down my face.
     The way that Charlie looked scared me out of my mind. It hurt so much to see him lying on the ground with his soaked fur sinking him down into the cold asphalt. Something in his eyes looked disappointed...let down.
I did this to him. When TOP and I last fought, I had left the gates wide open. Not realizing that Charlie could have easily left the house and gotten lost.
       Carefully as I could, I picked him up caressing his quite large body in my arms.
 "It's okay Charlie. It's okay. I'm sorry...I'm so s-sorry." I whispered rapidly into his ear, trying to soothe him down from the shock from the hit.
I can't let this happen to him...not this innocent angel.
I ran with smooth steps, trying not to hurt him any more. His body grew heavier with each step but I couldn't let him go...I could never.

I finally reached the clinic and thankfully it was still open even at this late hour.
       My feet rushed inside with Charlie still hanging on in my arms. My mind was on the brink of hysteria yet my conscience still held me together.
       I quickly found a nurse who took in Charlie on a clean white sheeted cart all the while getting my information through my weeping coughs. Finally she told me to take a seat in the bench by the hall.
Of course...I couldn't just sit in a bench by the hall.
       One of the only things that I had been caring so much about lately...I let this happen to him. It was me.
Cold wet strands of hair stuck to my face as I wept in my hands, thinking about the pain that I had caused Charlie.
       The dimly lit clinic hallway was narrow but it felt wide and out of reach. Something about this place was frightful...it was where the people who cared about the sick stayed and waited on them.
Just like the hallway in the operating wing at my mom's hospital. I had been there many times, alone and frightened. The waiting time was crucially painful...knowing that in any moment, the doctor could come in to tell you news that the person your cared about was about to die.
       I wasn't ready for that yet. Not my mom or Charlie. I couldn't do this alone...I just couldn't.
       Quick footsteps made its way into the hallway..ones that I could recognize any day. The clicking heels of an expensive pair of designer shoes and the way it sounded so straight and uniform.
 

      I immediately looked up with fearful eyes. They felt swollen with heavy tears but it didn't matter to me.
TOP's eyes were deep in bewilderment. There was an innocent and scared look deep inside his eyes along with his slightly open mouth that didn't know what to say. 
Of course, he looked flawless as ever but something about him was off. A couple strands of his hair were tousled in confusion themselves and his thin navy blue trench coat jacket was ed...a sign of disorderly chaos in terms of the perfect Choi Seunghyun.
       There was no moment of hesitation but his presence triggered a huge reaction in my tear capacity.
I cried the out of me.
       I don't know what happened or what he was thinking but the next thing I knew, I was in his arms.
He pulled me in, his one hand caressing my head into his chest, securing me into his warmth and the other wrapped around my back. The latter killed me even more.
      Strange thing was...I didn't resist against it. It felt somehow comfortable and reassuring. I didn't feel so alone anymore.
The scent of his sweet yet sharp cologne disfigured my mind but the warmth of his arms softened the coldness in my heart.
      "Are you okay?" He spoke softly in his deep voice as his damped lips brushed against the side of my head. It was obvious that he was thoroughly shaken up as much as I was but he was trying hard not to show it.

      "I-I didn't know...I just b-brought him here...I'm s-sorry.." The sobs came out of me with unconditional strength. It was as if I had never cried in my life...and this was probably the first time he had seen me really cry.
       TOP pulled me back and bent down just a little to match me eye to eye. With his careful fingers, he wiped my tears and tucked my soaking wet hair behind my ears.
       "Moon Raena, it's not your fault. I spoke with the doctor on the phone on my way here. She said Charlie will be okay." TOP kept a calm face as he tried to reassure me. His eyes were so real...they always had been every time I looked at him. 
       I bit my lips and nodded but the tears continued to roll out. I felt like such a kid. So little and immature...how was it that he was able to make me feel like a kid again. But it felt good to let it out.
All throughout my life, in every harsh situation I was in, I couldn't do anything but keep a straight face and force myself to grow up. I couldn't cry because I didn't have a shoulder to lean on. I couldn't whine because I had no one that would listen to me whine. I just had to grit my teeth and let the pain rot inside of me.
 But now...here I was. Crying in the arms of Choi Seunghyun.
         My body trembled not because I was freezing cold but because I felt as if I was walking on a tightrope. Everything felt confusing. Was I supposed to just let go for once? Let myself cry like this?
         He sat me down on the floor of the hallway and then sat down himself right next to me.

         After a few deep breaths, my mouth opened to speak again. "I'm...sorry." I pitifully said. My eyes stared blankly on the floor but in my mind, thoughts spun around like crazy.
        "I shouldn't have spoke so harshly...I-I'm so sorry.."
God damn it...why am I crying so much?
        "You're right...I am rude, I am indecent.." I continued but TOP cut me off.
He again pulled me close to him and hugged me gently with his arms.
     Rule number 3, the no touching policy is already violated I guess. But it was he that touched me...maybe the rules didn't apply then.
His jacket was slightly damp and cold but the warmth of his body penetrated the air and created a glowing mass of heat between us.
      "Don't cry...please." His voice was raw and deep, almost husky. I could hear his words muted through his neck and chest, creating a soft vibration against my body.
      He looked at me with soft eyes, his beautifully long eyelashes were laced with little tear drops that hung on like crystals. The transparent layer glossed his clear eyes, but he didn't blink so that the tears would gather up and reveal itself to me.
For once in my life, I finally had someone who was trying to be strong..for me.
Everything about TOP was always perfect. But his imperfectly messy hair, his tearful eyes and genuinely soft smile that night made him look even more perfect as a human being.

        Without saying much more, TOP drew me in even closer. My head rested on his firm shoulder and chest as our bodies closely lay together in that dark hallway. I could smell the wholesome scent of his body mixed in with the cleanliness of the spring rain intoxicating me but all the more luring me to calmness. We were so close to each other...almost as if we were one. My head was tucked underneath his chin using his arm and shoulder for a pillow. His other arm wrapped me in altogether. I was completely soaked but he didn't care. He didn't care one bit about using his five grand designer jacket to keep me warm to dry.
         "I'm the one who should be sorry.." TOP suddenly whispered. I could feel his chest vibrate. "I don't pity you...it's not pity." He spoke in a soft calming voice that let out in puffs of warm calming breaths. 
He didn't have to say anymore because I knew what he was talking about. I knew exactly what he meant.
      I had lost so many things in the past few days. My belongings, my "boyfriend", my pride. Now that I look at my feet, I realized that I lost one shoe coming all the way here...but there was one thing I didn't lose. In fact, I had gained something. Or someone.
Someone who cared.
      TOP didn't beat Jiwoo up or got upset at everything because he pitied me...he did it because he cared. Just like how I cared for my mom or how I cared for Charlie.
      Just like how I cared about him.

hi, author here. Won't be able to update for about two weeks so please be patient! Thanks for reading by the way! If you want to read the next chapter, 39, you can read on my instagram account @vipbigbangfics but I won't be updating on there for quite a while either. 

Oh and please up vote this fanfic if you don't mind doing so. :) thank you!