Chapter 72 – Get-Away Freedom

Youngest of Pieces: Five Years in History (9)

Jonghyun had it all planned within minutes. He even went to the bathroom to give a call to not just his own manager but to Hannah’s manager too, and after twenty minutes he is in the car with Hannah. Not just Hannah, they have brought Ryo and Michin with them and they have a brief stop to pick up Jonghyun’s dog Roo. And then they take on the road with two dogs in cages in the back of the car and Roo gets to be in Hannah’s arms.

Hannah is hiding under a huge sweater, looking pale and sad, and Jonghyun is not telling her where they are going. Hannah is quietly looking out the window until noticing they are leaving the city.

“You’ll like it,” Jonghyun says with a smile when she looks questioning at him.

“Aren’t you tired?” she wonders, more concerned that he has spent hours with her, not sleeping much, and then after this he has his radio at midnight.

“Are you?” Jonghyun asks, giving her a glance to see if she looks more tired than what she has done lately – it is really hard to se in her sad face.

“I’m asking you.”

“I’m not that tired,” Jonghyun answers and gives her another glance. “You can close your eyes for a bit if you want.”

She doesn’t close her eyes. She looks at him for a while, seeing his eyes on the road, how he glances at her, how he focuses on driving and then she looks out the window to try catch a sign letting her know where they are going. She can’t focus long on that and returns to look at him and to pat Roo who keeps looking around with the same curiosity Hannah think she should have too. For some reason she just can’t leave the blurred haze she is in, not knowing at all where they are going.

It worries him, like always. A Hannah who isn’t curious or asking a bunch of questions when she doesn’t know the destination is so different to the Hannah he knows, and it makes him take more glances of her. He is sure she will like it though, the place they are going for. He just needs to wait until they arrive there.

When coming closer to their destination, Jonghyun can’t help but to look a little excited when taking more and more glances of her, waiting for her to see it.

They enter the parking lot and Hannah is just staring at one thing; the ocean. The parking lot is empty in the evening when they arrive and Jonghyun easily gets to park right in front of the beach, and in front of that the ocean widens out endlessly. He looks so proud when seeing Hannah’s face just starting to glow when seeing where they are.

“Seriously?” she asks, her back straight when taking off the seatbelt as she sees Jonghyun preparing to go out. Her voice isn’t as flat as it was been since she came back to Sweden and Jonghyun just smiles widely.

“Seriously,” he answers and gets out of the car, waving for her to get out too as he steps to the back to take out the other puppies and the backpack he brought with him.

Hannah gets out of the car with Roo, putting him down and holds on to the leash, closing the door and just staring out at the ocean. He took her to the ocean, and she knows right away the reason for it; Seoul doesn’t have an endless sky, but the ocean makes it really endless. She smiles really big when Jonghyun comes up next to her, both Michin and Ryo jumping around being happy to be out of the car with them.

“You have always liked the ocean,” Jonghyun tells her, unable to stand still with the puppies jumping around them but he keeps looking at her as this was exactly the reaction he wanted. “And what’s more endless than this?”

“I seriously do not deserve you,” Hannah mumbles and gets up on her toes to give him a peck on the cheek before she smiles enormously and calls for the puppies to come as she starts to run.

Jonghyun laughs seeing her run out on the beach, and he lets go of the leashes of her puppies for them to brightly run after her. Three dogs and one woman, they are running like crazy down to the water and then up again, running around and Hannah laughs at how free and open this is. She loves it so much. The sky getting darker above them but there is not a single building nearby to cover the sky, the clouds look magical and Hannah just smiles up at it, seeing a glittering ocean going to where it meets the sky far out in nowhere and when looking over to Jonghyun she keeps smiling widely, holding out her hands at Jonghyun coming over to her. He has dropped the bag in the sand, the dogs are barking and running around and he smiles when putting his arms around her for a hug.

“That’s the girlfriend I have been looking for,” Jonghyun smiles against her lips, kissing her happily because she keeps smiling when hugging on to him.

She hugs him, not saying a thing but her face tells him everything. He loves it, seeing how Hannah holds on to his hand to run around with the puppies. The puppies all have their leash on, dragging behind them when they run around happily and free on the beach, and each time one of them seem to get a little too far away from the couple, they are called back and takes a sudden turn as if knowing they are going too far.

“That’s what I wanted to catch,” Jonghyun tells Hannah after some time just enjoying the beach, and she looks to where he is pointing out at the ocean, seeing the sun lowering among the clouds.

“The sun?” Hannah asks, continuing to look at the beautiful view of the ocean and sun and sky before them while Jonghyun wraps his arms around her.

“The sunset,” he corrects her.

She smiles, leaning her head to the side to try look at him and Jonghyun happily kisses her chin, making her laugh and Ryo is right away next to them, happily waving his tail and it makes the couple laugh even more. Hannah moves back and forth in Jonghyun’s arm, smiling at the puppy and laughing when they start to loose balance and Jonghyun starts going ‘oh, oh, oh’ and his arms are strongly trying to hold on to Hannah and when loosing balance, they both fall together down in the sand with a laugh.

Hannah happily falls on her back, dropping down her arms in the sand and Jonghyun has his hand on her back as he tried to make them not fall, but he laughs at how happy she looks from falling and he leans over her to give her a kiss as the puppies hurries to run next to them; Michin rolls around in the sand too.

“I have never been on this beach before,” Hannah mentions, smiling when he lies down on the side next to her.

“I have,” Jonghyun smiles back at her, holding up his head with his hand to look at her. “With my members a few times. I came to think of it when you said what you said, about an endless sky… It’s the most endless I could think of, and it’s romantic too – being here with you.”

The smile she gives him is soft, but her face looks more alive than it has done for days and it makes him smile endlessly at her. He knows she hasn’t felt good at all, but he is happy he has put her mind on other things even if it is just for a while, and she laughs when Roo comes running over them, Ryo barks too. Hannah ignores the dogs and puts her arm around Jonghyun to give him a kiss, just for a few seconds before she lies back down with her arms stretched out in the sand; Ryo is fast to sniff her hand, his tail waving happily.

“You really do love the ocean,” Jonghyun whispers to her, touching her hair lightly, watching her close her eyes and inhale deeply.

“If I close my eyes and breathes like this,” she whispers with a small smile, “I can be anywhere in the world. To just hear the ocean … calms me so much.”

He can see that. It looks like all her worries have disappeared, as if there is nothing troubling her in this world. It feels like an eternity to her of just lying there and breathing, hearing the ocean, the smell of it, the imagination of only a small island surrounded by water where she is lying. The sand under her is cold, but the tiny corns moves as simple as the waves when she takes her fingers through it, and in the mix of freedom she can feel him next to her, hear the panting of happy puppies and all she can do is to smile because she thinks this is the place where heaven can look down on them. Stuck in the big city, created by humans and surrounded by humans, nature can’t find a balance and it makes her suffocate thinking of how locked in she feels there. This is relaxing, this is like when she grew up; so much space, the lack of sounds, the calmness of the ocean and the simple thought of that she is able to smile without feeling bad for it and she doesn’t tear up thinking of her grandmother because of the breeze coming from nowhere.

“What are you thinking of?” Jonghyun wonders, unable to read her calm face.

“Nothing,” Hannah whispers, her smile honest and her voice happy. “Absolutely nothing…”

“So this is what you needed all along,” Jonghyun asks, “a place to just be?”

“Mm…”

He smiles and lies down on his back too, smiling up at the sky. “I’m happy I took you here,” he says. She turns her head to look at him, seeing Roo and Michin chasing each other a bit away from them, but her focus is on Jonghyun’s face.

“I’m happy too.”

The smile she shows him when he turns to look at her is true, and it melts his heart. Jonghyun leans over her again, kissing her softly on the lips, caressing her hair and really feeling her lips brush against his, her soft hair between his fingers. He doesn’t tell her how scared he has been these hours; that she would just disappear in front of him, to stop existing and he wouldn’t be able to do anything. He knows she will not be like this for long, she will return to her sorrow once they go back because she will be reminded of it all in a bad way, and for that he find this time precious.

“When going to the beach, you need to be barefoot,” Jonghyun mumbles against her lips, smiling when she leans her head up as if thinking he is impossible.

Jonghyun sits up, smiling at her when taking off his shoes. Hannah sees how he pulls off one sock and she sits up to do the same. As soon as he is barefoot, he grabs her foot that still is fully dressed and Hannah laughs when he helps her to take off both her shoe and her sock, and then tucks up the sweatpants over her calves. She smiles extra much when he looks at her, his fingers caresses down the skin on her leg. She gives him the other foot for him to tuck up the leg there too.

“Did I bring my phone…?” Hannah wonders when their feet are in the sand, toes curling up in it. It’s not that cold.

“It’s in the bag, why?” Jonghyun asks, now able to smile over that she has no idea of what happened before they came here. He packed the bag, even was the one packing down her cell phone because she seemed totally unaware of its existence. He goes to get the bag when Hannah moves her hand, showing she wants to take a picture and he gives her the phone before sitting down next to her, putting the bag next to him.

He sees how she tries to take a picture of their feet with the ocean in the background, and he is fast to direct their feet to make it look like hers are leaning towards his, and when she takes the picture he is the one leaning his head towards her to see how it turns out like.

“I want to do something too,” Jonghyun says and hurries up on his feet when she is done.

He gets down to the waterline and starts to draw something with his hand; it’s easy to see what it is, and the puppies runs around them in the same excitement they has had since they came. Hannah takes a picture of the three dogs running down the beach, calls on them to come back and she takes a few more pictures of the running dogs before turning around to see Jonghyun squatting down with his own cell phone and takes a picture of the heart with the ocean and sun in the background. It looks so good that she has to take one too, and then she gets to take the same picture for him but with him squatting next to the heart and giving a peace sign, hiding himself under the cap but his smile still visible.

All of a sudden Hannah points out at the sun.

“It’s disappearing,” she tells him.

“It’s setting,” he laughs when correcting her, getting up next to Hannah to hold her hand while seeing the sun far out above the ocean, about to set. It takes time, and they stand there in silence for a minute while just admiring the colours in front of them, of how free it feels to stand there, hand in hand, and just look at the sunset.

“I’m sorry,” Hannah says in a low voice, loud enough for him to hear. He looks at her, but she only looks at the sun, making him wonder if she talks to him or to someone else. “I doubt life all the time; I have grown up to think like that and even when trying it doesn’t seem to work. That doesn’t mean I don’t appreciate what I have or what I had. I have said bad things to you, I have meant most of it I think, but I don’t want to believe it. I want to live the life I have here, and I really want to spend my life with you even if I don’t think I deserve it… I’m serious when I say I am not girlfriend material, far from being a wife, and the difference between our culture is that being a wife in Korea is the opposite of the kind of person I am, and I can never see myself like that either.”

Jonghyun hugs on to her hand, squeezing it and smiles when she looks at him.

“I know who I fell in love with, Hannah. I don’t want a Korean wife – I want you. I want you with all your problems and worries, all your confidence and insecurities, all your love and support, all that passion and devotion. I want nothing else than to have you look at me and see a reflection of the love we have. The perfect me that you see is the perfect you that I see.”

“I’m still sorry,” Hannah pouts. “For what I did…”

“Don’t be,” Jonghyun shakes his head and moves to turn her towards him so he can put his arms around her, feeling Hannah put hers around his waist. “Love makes us do foolish things. What matters is now.”

As if turning off the lights, they can see the difference in the sky and as if switching the day into night they both turn to look at the sun.

“We missed it!” Hannah bursts out in disbelief, Jonghyun just laughs.

“If we were filmed, it would be precious,” he tells her with a laugh. “To look at each other in front of the setting sun …”

“But we missed it,” Hannah pouts. She too can’t hide to smile when he gives her a hug, mumbling in her hair that they can see it many times in their future. She laughs when grabbing his hand, getting out of his embrace to start walk down the beach. The dogs are fast to run in their direction, wanting to come along.

Hand in hand, Hannah smiles as they walk slowly together, the puppies getting before them. Roo walks next to them, the other two just runs wildly. Jonghyun smiles too, lifting up their hands where their fingers are linked to kiss her at the back of the hand, and Hannah kisses him on his shoulder.

Even for a moment, this is their get-away freedom. Just them and nature, no pressure to look good, no pressure to say anything, no pressure to be someone else than who you feel to be in this moment, just … a get-away freedom. For a moment they don’t think of going back, just enjoying right now. Hannah likes it. How he manages to get her in other thoughts and how he makes her headache disappear by taking her out here.

On the way back to reality, they stop by a rest stop closer to the beach than the big city. It’s late, not midnight-late just yet but still late, and there are travellers and a few people at the rest stop where the couple decides to get something to eat – Jonghyun’s idea.

The best thing with this rest stop is that it is big, and after getting their food (two trays) they can walk as far away from others as possible to take a seat by themselves outside in the late evening light. To eat outdoors means the puppies can be with them too, though the three puppies just sleeps by now. Even now it feels relaxing, like they are in no hurry for anything, and they just enjoy their meal with some chatting. Hannah eats too little in Jonghyun’s opinion, but after getting her to eat a little more than she wants to he stretches his hand out to eat what’s left from her tray. For a moment they sit with their cell phones too, to look through the pictures they have taken. Hannah shows him the picture she took of him sleeping in the sofa earlier too, and she smiles when showing it to him because she has no memory of taking it. Hannah uploads the picture of their feet on instagram, a part of her gray sweatpants visible too, but she likes the picture, how it has simple colours and seems endless.

{Instagram, 5P_HANNAH: Mind-healing when needed the most}

Jonghyun uploads a picture on twitter; the one Hannah took of him, the heart, and the sunset. He doesn’t write anything else than ‘heart’ as if he is describing the picture. It takes seconds after update before Jonghyun shows it to Hannah, seeing the comments. Hannah receives it too, fans commenting right away and liking her pictures, but what Jonghyun wants to show her are the comments about them. Because both of them have put up their own picture, fans put it together. Hannah’s picture gets comments that it is Jonghyun’s feet while Jonghyun’s picture gets comments asking if Hannah took the picture. They are so fast to connect the pictures that Jonghyun just laughs reading the comments.

He sees it at the rest stop too; people recognized them, that’s why he wanted to sit as far away as possible and he looks up whenever he sees any movement. A Korean family with three children have the two older two secretly taking pictures of them, and Jonghyun does see it even if he doesn’t say anything because they keep their distance and even hides so the pictures can’t turn out well on their cell phones. Like always when being in public and he knows where the eyes of curious viewers are, he keeps Hannah on his other side if possible as if protecting her.

Hannah doesn’t notice a thing. She is still in a tiny haze, and she just focuses on not eating too much and Jonghyun that she is pretty unaware of their surrounding.

With fans already knowing they went together, Hannah uploads another picture on Instagram when they are back in the car, this time a picture she had taken at the end of the puppies running around and Jonghyun walking in side, his hand reached back as she had dropped it to take a steady picture. She asks him in the car about the picture, to get his approval before uploading it; you can’t see his face, mostly just his neck down to his outstretched hand, but she still wants to know if it is a silly picture to upload or not. And the point in the picture is that she uploads it without writing a single thing.

Their get-away freedom is over. Hannah can feel it when they enter the big city called Seoul. All the lights, all the high buildings – they return to reality.

With a sigh she returns to her apartment, tiredly lying down in the sofa with Ryo in her arms and just looking out in nowhere, still calm from the small trip. Jonghyun has gone to his radio, he just came up with her to make sure she came indoors and then he had to leave as he had to drop by at home for his dog before going to work. Hannah doesn’t mind him leaving; he said he will come back afterwards.

Coming back, she knows the ladies will be back the day after tomorrow, and she knows Jonghyun will not want her to be drunk being a mess when he comes back this night; he will need to sleep. That means she needs to make the apartment less of a mess. Though her body is tired and her mind is relaxed, she goes to the office to simply just put everything away, hide the mess to make a throughout cleaning another time, and then goes to her bedroom to try, really try, to fix what she did in it. Yes, it is still a mess in her room.

Tuning in on Jonghyun’s radio she listens to his voice while cleaning up and it is easier to clean up tonight. Going to the beach has just emptied her, she doesn’t feel as heavy and her head isn’t hurting, she can just live on for now. She gets into the cleaning, being effective when getting into the rhythm with her body and it feels like an hour has passed while it in fact is two.

The room has turned out to look pretty well. Clothes are a mess, just shoved away while she has fixed the drawer and put things back more or less. She has thrown the lamp in the kitchen, there is no way that one can be saved, and she does not notice anything strange in the kitchen because her manager cleaned it all up this past morning. She has no memory of throwing the bottle of beer last night, and even if she did it would be nothing giving it away in here. Her manager has cleaned it all up; thrown away the empty bottles and the rest of the bottles still unopened are gone, the manager not trusting her with alcohol in the apartment. Even the wine bottle and champagne has been removed, not that Hannah looks; she has no interest in alcohol this night.

In the drawer she had found some candles, gift from fans, she lightens the red ones in her bedroom – on the drawer and on the bookcase, more on the bookcase to fill it with light. She undresses to put on a loose t-shirt to her underwear, and walks around cleaning to keep her mind occupied. She has thrown a pair of pyjama pants on the bed that she will put on later, but for now she is without pants when cleaning up in the bathroom from her bath earlier – anything to keep herself occupied. Once she bathtub is clean she goes back to her bedroom, gathering the pictures she had earlier taken and she begins to put them up on the wall between her awards and bathroom door. She just puts them up, looking at the pictures of her members and couple pictures of her with Jonghyun, a lot of pictures she can not remember when they were taken but she likes the friendship and closeness shown in each picture. She is putting the pictures on this wall to hide them, no one will see them unless they know they are there, and she likes that. Her own hidden corner behind her own fame since the awards will cover them if you stand by the door.

Her laptop gives out a sound, and Hannah stares at her wall before her. Someone is writing to her, probably one of the ladies. Jonghyun has talked to them more than Hannah; he has been the one writing to them because Hannah hasn’t been reacting over anything. It makes a sound three more times right after each other, and Hannah understands who is writing to her.

Lying down on the bed with the laptop she sees it is the person she thought it would be – Maria. Maria is always restless when texting or writing on Skype, writing a word and then sends it, writing another word and sends it a second later, just for it to give a buzz a lot of times in a row. Seeing what Maria has written she first asks how Hannah is doing, and then adds a ‘?’ in the next sent one, followed by two more and then three before asking if she is awake. Hannah writes shortly back that she is awake and waiting for Jonghyun to come, and while Maria is writing Hannah asks is she is having fun at home.

While writing to Maria through Skype, Hannah looks around on the internet; Instagram and the usual pages she visits. It doesn’t take many minutes until she finds an article that has come out this night. ‘Jjong-Han Couple Spotted Enjoying A Date, Uploads Individual Pictures Of Their Romantic Beach Get-Away’ is the headline and though their personal pictures doesn’t show the other person, fans had understood they were there together and now they have received bad-quality pictures of them at the rest stop – which Hannah just clueless wonders how they were taken as she has no memory of that at all. The article writes a lot of unnecessary words, saying they announced being together a year ago and so on, and Hannah just glances through it until she reads the comments, which always seems to be a lot more interesting than the actual article. Fans are smart, indeed very smart. With other members spotted in Sweden; Julia has uploaded pretty pictures being on a yard with dogs and saying she is with her sister, Maria has been seen spending time with her younger cousins and being with her sisters at their hometown, the fans seems to find it strange that Hannah is uploading a picture with Jonghyun. It could easily be thought that she is at a beach in Sweden since that is where all the other members are, besides from that Jonghyun can not travel to and from Korea and Sweden within 24 hours for his radio broadcast. That’s when the comments get deeper and more focused; why is Hannah left in Korea? The talk about her fight with her family is brought up among the comments, fans pitying her for not going home with her members, some saying it is good she is not left alone, thanking Jonghyun or saying Puzzle will always be here for her.

The doorbell makes a sound and Hannah gets up so fast that her head spins for a few seconds, and she is wiping her tears after throwing on her pyjama pants and rushing downstairs. She hasn’t cried much now, only a few tears, and she wonders if it really makes a difference since she has been crying for days.

He eyes her the moment she opens the door, and Hannah steps to the side, avoiding to look at him in worry he will see she has been crying again. Jonghyun comes inside the apartment, glancing at her when taking off his shoes and he asks what she has been up to.

“Not much, just waiting,” she answers, watching him from behind until he turns around and she looks down.

“What is it?” Jonghyun wonders.

She is obvious when looking away from him; she won’t let him see her eyes. Hannah shakes her head in answer and Jonghyun sighs when putting his arms around her, kissing her forehead and travels down to kiss her cheek and holds on to her in a hug when hiding his face in her hair.

“You’ve been crying again,” he breathes in her hair, “It’s easy to see even if you don’t look at me.”

“I’m allowed to cry,” Hannah pouts against his chest, blinking as she does not want to swell up in tears again thinking of her grandmother.

“You’re not allowed to lie to me,” Jonghyun says and leans back, both hands grabs on to her face for her to look up at him. She thinks his hands have gotten rougher with her, holding her harder recently, and his voice is dark when he says; “Don’t lie to me.”

“I don’t lie to you and you know why I cry.”

His big hands hold on to her face tightly, she can see how his own jaw tightens as if he wants to crush her into understanding, but instead of crushing her he kisses her forehead again. She gives out a whine under his hands, not wanting to be kissed on the forehead, and she grabs on to his hands so she can move her head to his, kissing him on the lips and as soon as their lips touches she removes his hands so she can put hers on his neck, not letting him lean away. Jonghyun doesn’t lean away from her though, he kisses her back, his tongue touches her lip and they pull each other closer to one another, hungrily making out.

“You’re impossible,” Jonghyun moans in , kissing her so deeply she looses all strength in her body.

It doesn’t stop him; Jonghyun pushes her up against the wall, his hand holds on to her neck with his thumb right under her chin, being the one in control when kissing her. She tries to hold on to his hair but her fingers find no strength, just holding on to him, her heart racing gloriously and she can’t stop while making out.

He is out of breath when softening the kiss, wet lips kissing hers and she can not help but to smile widely when he is breathing on her. He wants her, she loves how his body gives that away, and she loves that he so easily can put her in other thoughts.

“So…” Jonghyun chuckles, his nose touches hers while he watches her smile, “What do you want to do?”

The smirk in his voice makes her laugh, and though she knows what he means it is not what she think they should do. “Let’s go sleep,” she suggests and she keeps smiling at him when Jonghyun gives a laugh, amused by heating things up with a kiss to then say they should sleep. He nods and kisses her passionately before taking a step back, taking her hand in his to go upstairs. She would gladly do something else than sleep now when he is here, but he should sleep, he needs to sleep. She doesn’t want him to fall asleep at his radio or in the car because he can’t sleep when he is with her. She can’t stand being the reason for that.

Right outside the bedroom Hannah can smell the scent of her candles, and she rushes before Jonghyun inside the room, starting to blow out the candles that she had completely forgotten about.

“Oh, you make it romantic in here when I am not around?” Jonghyun laughs and grabs her arm to pull her to him. “Keep them. It’s cosy with candles. Is it okay if I take a shower first?”

Hannah nods, gliding out of his arms to turn to her laptop on the bed. Jonghyun smiles, for a moment he has forgotten her sorrow, only to be reminded of it when she turns away from him. He could see her face when she turned around, her smile disappeared; he thinks she is tired of looking sad around him. He takes in a deep breath when pulling off his clothes on the way to the bathroom, holding the clothes in his hand. It’s visible that she has been occupied with things while he was done; her bedroom looks different from what it did when he left, just the fact that she has lightened candles means she has cleaned up well enough for that.

The bathroom looks the same though, the small bathroom next to Hannah’s room, where she has no idea he has his own bag. He brought it with him the other day, not knowing if he would want to leave her to go home and change clothes. With Hannah in the room next too, Jonghyun takes a quick shower and washes up, he sings in the shower too, imagining Hannah lying in bed and smiling at the sound of his voice.

Just in his boxers Jonghyun comes back inside the bedroom, taking his hand through his wet hair and stopping right outside the bathroom, looking to his left at some pictures on the wall. He has seen the pictures before, he has taken some of them as well, but he has never seen them on the wall. For sure she has kept herself busy when he wasn’t here, maybe restlessly waiting for his return. He smiles when turning around to look at the bed; Hannah is lying furthest in by the wall under the quilt, lying there with her cell phone. She seems to have blown out some of the candles; some of them still lightning up the room when Jonghyun turns off the lamp.

“Tomorrow at this time, your members will almost be back,” Jonghyun says and crawls up on his knees on the bed, smiling down at Hannah when coming closer to her. “What are you planning on doing until then?”

“This?” Hannah asks and widens her arms next to her on the bed, the cell phone in one hand and she smiles at Jonghyun when he leans over her, holding his weight up with his hands on each side of hers.

“You want to stay in bed the whole time?” Jonghyun smiles, lowering his bottom to rest on her and Hannah lifts up a leg next to his body – he likes how they move together, if he moves closer she will move closer too. “Do you want to sleep the whole time?”

Hannah giggles when putting her arms softly around his neck and her palms touches his muscular back when he lies over her to kiss her cheek.

“For now we’ll sleep,” she giggles to him and Jonghyun playfully her lip lightly. “If you don’t do that.”

“What if I keep doing it?” Jonghyun teases, her again so she shakes her head away. He just chuckles and kisses her softly, mumbling that they should indeed get some sleep. He rolls down on his back next to her, taking a hand through his wet hair to keep it out of his face, and he smiles at Hannah who lies on her side to watch him, hugging her hands together as if she will pray.

“Aren’t you sleepy?” she wonders.

“I am,” Jonghyun says and closes his eyes, not even being under the quilt. “But I’m always hungry for you, Nabi.”

Taking a deep breath his muscles tenses and Hannah is eyeing him up and down. “I think you’re always hungry for something, my Hybrid,” she teases and pulls the quilt off her in the same movement as she moves to him, putting one leg over his body and she lies over him, kissing him on the chest lightly before kissing his chin and she smiles down at Jonghyun who had blinked surprisingly at her movement. “You sure you don’t want to sleep?”

A smirk grows in his face at her question. “It’s too late to ask now, Nabi,” he whispers while placing his hands on her legs, “You crossed that line.”

You crossed that line when you me,” Hannah hints and nibbles on his chin, her hand caress his compact abs.

He lifts his head up to her on the lips again, and this time he grabs her head to kiss her too. He is strong when he takes control, and Hannah has gotten weak these days that she does not have the strength to fight for the control now, which makes her lean over him when he lies down again, following his lead. He can feel her give in and he rolls them around while kissing her with lust, his hand caresses her shape; down her to her hip, up to her waist to hold on to her flesh. His hand glides down again, to her thigh, to her , then up again and this time his hand touches her skin under the t-shirt. She is occupied by his lips to take much notice of his hand, his tongue playing with hers, his body leaning over hers.

A pair of hands grabs on to hers and pins them with only one hand above her head, and for a second she is lost in the kissing again. A hand goes between her legs and she gives out a gasp, just to be drowned in his kissing. She lifts her body against his hand and body, starting to moan anew.

Jonghyun smiles when stopping to kiss her, looking down at her gaping for him. His hand is still between her legs.

“It’s no one here to hear us now,” he tells her, satisfaction in his whole face knowing no lady is in the apartment to hear them. He kisses her again. “I want to hear you moan like you did at the hotel.”

She giggles at how he is growling his words out, and she meets his eyes between the wet kisses. “Only if you do the same,” she whispers to him, barely able to finish saying it because the moment he knows what she says he kisses her again.

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Nine hours of sleep. Jonghyun is staring at the time. He has actually slept for nine hours? It’s in the middle of the day; he has actually slept for this long. He smiles knowing the reason for it. Not just exhaustion, it is Hannah who helps him sleep. He has no idea of how it works but he can sleep better with her, every time. Looking at his side, Hannah is sleeping next to him. She is lying on her stomach, her face pressed against the pillow and she too seems to be able to sleep well now. He breathes out and lies on his side to look at her, removing a lock from her face lightly. She looks troubled, but he has no doubt she is heavily sleeping. He worries she is having bad dreams with that troubled look on her face, wondering if she have any dreams of her family.

For nine hours has he been sleeping, he smiles again, happy by it. Carefully he lays his arm over Hannah and closes his eyes. If she is still sleeping he can rest for a bit longer too.

“Mom once told me to stop thanking for every meal I get.”

He blinks to look at her, within seconds her closed eyes had tear up. For seconds he has to repeat her words to understand what she said, he had not expected to hear her voice at all.

Hannah sighs when continuing; “I told her I was thankful for the food she makes every day, all the time and effort she put to it. But she just shook her head and told me to leave her alone… I think I remember when I thanked my grandmother for dinner once, and she smiled back at me…” Her voice disappears in the tears and Jonghyun quietly hushes while hugging on to her. She misses her grandmother, a person she hasn’t seen in a long time but has always missed. With a whine of missing her grandmother and being embarrassed of waking up in tears she puts an arm around Jonghyun and hides herself in the pillow while hugging him.

It takes a minute for her to realise it is not just her own sobbing she hears, and her fingertips starts going up and down his back in comfort.

“Why are you crying?” she asks with a light laugh, leaning her head back to look at him. Jonghyun takes his hand through her hair, smiling against the pillow while he too is crying.

“You’re crying.”

“I have cried for days.”

“Then I can’t cry?” Jonghyun mumbles sadly, his big hand is put on her face to wipe her tears messily. “You tell me those things without even opening your eyes and you don’t think I will react to it?”

He smiles when she pouts at his answer and he forces a tearful kiss on her forehead, worried she will apologize again. With them both crying it seem funnier and Hannah ends up smiling at him, putting her hand in his face to wipe his tears a lot softer than what he did to her.

“What did you dream to say those things?” Jonghyun wonders, blinking in a try to see her behind his tears.

“I don’t know… I thought of Christmas,” Hannah answers while taking her hand through his hair. “My whole family gathered at my grandparents’ house… It happened one time that all of us where there, my cousins where there too.”

She has stopped crying now, but Jonghyun can’t seem to stop, and she can’t stop looking at him. For minutes he is crying, not bawling like she has done but just random crying. Quietly she is lying there looking at him, admiring her boyfriend who is not embarrassed at all to cry when she is there.

“You’re cute,” Hannah comments after a long silence.

Jonghyun laughs and rolls away from her, Hannah laughs too when he lets his back face her.

“What?” she laughs and gets up to lean on her arm, leaning over him to have her chin resting on his shoulder. “You don’t like being cute?”

“Aren’t I y? You always say I’m y and handsome and good-looking…” Jonghyun mumbles.

She don’t think he really is upset, so she smiles when pressing her lips against his bare shoulder, lifting her chin up when answering his question; “You’re cute too. Like right now, you are cute.”

“Hannah,” Jonghyun sighs and turns around to put his arm under her, holding her to face him, “I am lying in your bed and you say I am cute?”

It’s not a giggle she responses with, but more of a chuckle in that makes him feel absolutely hopeless. Her boyfriend is lying in her bed, of course that is y, but she was watching his face when he was crying and that was cute.

Before Hannah can give him a good answer, they can hear someone downstairs, entering the hall and asking if anyone is home. It’s like you wake up to gunshots and your body panics right away. Within seconds Hannah has run up from bed, thrown on pants and she brings a zip-up sweater with her when rushing out the room, pulling it on before getting down the stairs.

“Oh, you’re home.”

It’s stylist Mi Young who smiles by the entrance to the hall, carrying some things.

“I’m just leaving some things and then I’ll get going,” the stylist says. “I have written a note so you can just let the ladies read it when they come in the morning, it is clothes for the filming on Tuesday but I won’t sort it out but you can just look it through and choose which outfit you like.”

Hannah just hears a lot of talking, nodding along and biting her lip. Mi Young keeps glancing at her while slowly stepping further inside the apartment with her heavy luggage. “Do you want any help?” Hannah asks.

“No, it’s okay…” Mi Young breathes out.

“I’ll help anyway,” Hannah says in a low voice and takes half of the struggle away from her stylist’s shoulders to head upstairs with it.

“Isn’t Jonghyun here?” Mi Young asks when they are going up the stairs.

“He’s in my room,” Hannah answers.

“Oh. What are you two up to then?”

“We just woke up.”

Mi Young stops above the stairs to give her a strange glare and then keeps walking, greeting Jonghyun through the door when passing by and Hannah stops by to peek inside her bedroom, letting him know she is just going to help Mi Young a bit – Jonghyun is not moving from the bed, saying he will wait there – and Hannah walks to the last room on the floor that they use as a wardrobe for all ladies, the stylist starting to hang the clothes on the clothing rack at the centre for the ladies to know what to do. But it’s awkward. Hannah doesn’t know what it is but Mi Young is saying a few things, not really making any sense, but Hannah’s senses are dull from the past days they she just finds it awkward and weird.

“Have you been sleeping all day?” Mi Young wonders quietly.

“Mm… But I was up all night waiting for Jonghyun to come after his radio, so we didn’t fall asleep until it was morning,” Hannah says, feeling she is saying an excuse because they had when he came but truth is she was up waiting for him too…

“He has been with you ever since you came back?” Mi Young sounds impressed and she gives out an impressed sound when Hannah nods. He has only left to work at night on his radio, but otherwise he has been with her the whole time. He has to leave earlier today because of other work, but maybe he can have time for dinner before that.

The awkwardness returns when Mi Young gets quiet, and Hannah is putting up the last clothes. She doesn’t even know what kind of clothes she is putting up, and Mi Young is writing a long, long note that she hangs over the clothes before she is done.

“Your manager came in the morning to walk the dogs, but she said you and Jonghyun were still sleeping then so she just came and went, but she told me to tell you that she will come for the dinner walk too, and the maid will come around the same time to clean and buy groceries…” Mi Young is saying when Hannah follows her downstairs. “You can text your manager if you want something special for dinner or she will just buy something from the usual nearby.”

“Mm,” Hannah nods. It is a lot of information, she isn’t sure she will remember half of it.

“So I’ll get going,” Mi Young sighs when they walk inside the hall, Hannah going with her as the one living in the apartment. She feels rude otherwise. The stylist puts on her shoes and looks at Hannah when slowly taking her keys, and not until now does Hannah see how sad her stylist is looking at her. “I’m so sorry about your grandmother, Hannah.”

Hannah shakes her head but just to hear a person mention it makes her tear up and she hides her tears by hugging the stylist. She had no idea her stylist would say something like that; she hasn’t even thought anyone would say a thing about it. Hannah hadn’t thought about this at all so it came unexpected to hear it. Mi Young hugs her, patting her back and letting Hannah sob on her shoulder. It’s not for long, Hannah manages to control herself and apologize, hugging on to her stylist another time before letting her go and Mi Young says it is good Jonghyun is there for her.

As soon as her stylist leaves, Hannah takes a look around the floor before rushing upstairs, heading inside the bedroom where Jonghyun is lazily lying on his back looking at his cell phone.

“You were talking about me, weren’t you?” he smiles when she enters and Hannah nods, hurrying to jump on the bed and lie over him with her head on his chest, holding her own cell phone in hand. “Tsk. Maria has texted me fourteen times today, asking why I’m not answering if things are going okay.”

“Emelia has texted to ask if I’m feeling better…” Hannah mumbles. “Can’t you stay later?”

“Forever?” Jonghyun jokes, a hand touching her back while they are both eyeing their cell phones. Hannah removes his hand to lie down next to him in the bed, unlike him not hiding under the quilt, and she lies on her side to glance at him over her phone.

“Forever and ever,” she tells him.

He smiles at her. “What did Mi Young Nuna want?” he then wonders, changing the subject.

“Um… Just leaving some things to when we’re filming Good Sister,” Hannah answers – that much she understood – and she is smilingly leaning away when he leans closer to her.

“You’re filming tomorrow?” he wonders.

“Um…” Hannah drags out on the sound and gives him a glance that says she doesn’t know and Jonghyun laughs, leaning over to kiss her on the cheek.

“What are we doing today then?” Jonghyun wants to know.

“We can always take the puppies out for a walk- Ah, Oppa, did you hear my manager coming this morning?”

“No…”

“She came to feed them and take them on a walk,” Hannah says, remembering what her stylist said.

“I heard nothing,” he answers. “But you want to take a walk then? Can we eat first?”

Hannah nods, but he doesn’t get up so she doesn’t move an inch, just smiling at him and he is smiling at her.

“Will you be okay when I leave later?” Jonghyun asks, and he is really watching her face when asking that question to see how she really reacts. She nods her head, smiling when jokingly saying she will have the pets to keep her company. “I can come back after my radio.”

“You don’t have to,” Hannah laughs, actually feeling bad that he comes all the time, and she is still not aware of the bag of his in the bathroom.

“But I want to,” Jonghyun whispers with a smile.

“Then you can come,” Hannah giggles.

“Really?” Jonghyun leans over her, smiling when she blushes. “I can come at three in the morning and wrap my arms around you? Then when the ladies come home in the morning, will you just run away from me to go to their arms instead?”

“What are you saying?” Hannah laughs and moves her head away from his, failing because he is almost lying over her.

“What should we eat?”

“What do you want to eat?” Hannah asks.

He glances down a bit and Hannah burst out in laughter, shy that he looks at her body and it makes her push him off her so she can roll against the wall laughing. “Seriously?” she laughs so loudly at him and Jonghyun shifts the quilt over him when moving closer to her, grabbing her thigh to put it over him.

“I am always serious,” he tells her with a smirk, “y and handsome and serious.”

“And cute,” she adds because she can hear he is bringing that up again. She laughs when he grabs her waist as if he will tickle her but he just grabs it to turn her to lie on her back so he can kiss her.

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Headline 27th: JjongHan Couple Spotted Enjoying A Date, Uploads Individual Pictures Of Their Romantic Beach Get-Away

Headline 27th: ‘Good Sister’ Does Not Air This Week Either

Headline 27th: [Girls Power] Revealed To Be This Week’s Winner On SBS Inkigayo

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X. devonalias

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SuperShannon
#1
Chapter 81: Yo, it's almost time for going back to school
Could you keep uploading a chapter twice a week please?
min2key
#2
Chapter 81: thank you for the updates.

have a nice holiday author-nim :)

figthing! ^^
SuperShannon
#3
I know that it's early but Merry Christmas
Could you upload this story with more chapters please
It's Christmas break!
SuperShannon
#4
Chapter 79: Aren't you uploading the lyrics too?
SuperShannon
#5
Chapter 78: All cause of me, I requested them
min2key
#6
Chapter 74: oh! I thought this was completed already as it says earlier that it was completed... hahhahaa anyways fighting!
atowah #7
Chapter 73: Wow wonderful story ♡
I like this idea it is amazing ;)
Fighting ♥
min2key
#8
Thank you for this such great story... I really enjoyed reading it... :)
SuperShannon
#9
Could you continue updating this story please, pretty please!!!
min2key
#10
Chapter 69: another update! :) and I must say every update is worth waiting for... keep it up! fighting! :)