SungGyu gave a chuckle to break the silence, 
" This society is a society with a lot of competition. We’ve been through competition since we auditioned and constantly competed with each other during our trainee days. Also, we couldn’t help but compete with other teams after debuting as well. As it gets better and better, there’s still larger competitions waiting for you, so don't become tired from them..." he gave a smile that cause his eyes to form a fine line... that kind of reminds you of Daehyun.. " Fighting! Journalist Baek."
(Credit) 

You smiled back, you see every member of the team giving you bright smiles. 
The whole situation was barely understood by your brain, how is it possible they would have the answers for you even though you just met them. 
Honestly, you can't imagine being friends with them after a single interview. 
But... you know, they are different. 
Maybe, everyone out there are like this. 
You can't never see them just as they are presented, who knows they may be your new best friend? 

You grinned. " Ji Yeon, I'm Ji Yeon, call me JiYeon. " 


You left their company with a smile. 
You can't believe, they were really the reason for the strength in you now. 

LIfe is unpredictable. 
Who ever knew, you will meet such a friendly group like Infinite? 
Who ever knew, you would land in such a job?
Who ever knew, you would be back in Korea? 

More importantly.. you knew, your heart has not moved on. 
You grimaced at that thought,..
" Daehyun, the war has barely started, I'm already backing out.. Can I do this? " you muttered. 





You made your way back home. 
The apartment wasn't looking as bare as before. 
It kinda feel more like a home. 
A shelter for your feelings. 
To hide.. 

You finally got the courage, you took out your papers for Infinite and B.A.P's interview. 

You stood before your computer. 
You glanced at the recorder.. 
Your hands were on your lap. 
There was this awkward silence hearing the ticking of the needles of the clock in your bedroom. 

" Tick Tick Tick... " 

" Twenty seconds of Crazy Courage. Jiyeon! " 
You started counting. 
"1.. " You squeezed your fingers to curl in. 
"2.. " You shut your eyes. 
"3,... 4... " It's just a recording, you reprimanded yourself. 
" 10...11..." you the plastic cover of the recorder. 
"13,...14.. "  your fingers lingered at the button. "18... 19.. " Just press it already JiYeon. 

You pressed the button. 

YongGuk's voice was heard first. 
You smiled. 

You did it, Jiyeon. 
You did it. 


You smiled to yourself. as you hear the familiar voices as they did their introduction. 

" I'm happy to see you" 
Daehyun's voice rang in your head. 
"Me too.. " You whispered to no one in particular. 

" First Question, How does B.A.P, as a group views their current success? " 
You listened as you typed into a word document. 

You tried to catch on to Yongguk's words, occasionally replaying at words you've missed out. 


You're finally on to the next question, 
" Which member do you think will be the first to get married? " 
You smiled at this.. 
Imagine all six of them getting married in a single ball room. 
What a sight.. 
Your heart had this weird feeling.. somehow the word wedding felt like a "taboo".. 
You glanced solemnly at the screen as you typed their reply. 


" Who in this room, can finish five bowls of ramyun under fifteen minutes? " 

You smiled at this... 
You miss eating ramyun with them.. 
You miss eating YongGuk Oppa's ramyun.. 
But.. what you missed more was just going to their houses like they were yours and talk just like the old times. 
You can't anymore. 
Not anymore.. 


You realised the recording was sounds of laughing, it broke your chain of thoughts, you replayed and retyped. 

" Since Christmas is coming, each member come up with a gift that they will present to their fans. It can be a situational question, or.. even better, fan service during next performance. " 

You giggled at this, as your mind wandered to what they suggest as gift for their fans. 
You thought of Daehyun acting manly... 
You burst into smiles. 

You found yourself finding an image of him on the internet, you lightly your screen and giggled. 
"Yes,... you're so manly... " 
You bit your lips.. 

Then it hit you, what you were doing.. 
You gave a straight face and continued editing your work. 

" This is work.. This is work.. " you chanted to yourself. 

FINALLY.. you were done. 

You started to work on Infinite's one. 

And when you've finished, it was already 12 in the night.. 
Your stomach had been growling non-stop and you were doing a great job at ignoring it. 

You sighed, and made your way to the kitchen. 
You opened your cupboards, your fridge. 
OUT OF FOOD. 

You glanced at the clock.. 
Should you go out now? 
Aish, you could do some dieting... 

You searched for a packet of biscuits to keep your stomach silent, 
You went into your room. 

You pulled your blankets. 
For some odd reason, you miss having Daehyun.. 
" Daehyun -ah... " you suddenly spoke out, aware that you're alone in the room. 
" is this right? " 

You felt a tear slid down. 
Why are you always crying when you think of him? 

Soon... you fell into slumber. 
 
(A/N: hehehes.. was listening to SHINee's In Your Room.... ) 







The next few days, you worked diligently. 
You covered as much news as you could. 
You made frequent trips back home. 
You missed your parents, and you wanted to be filial to them. 

" JiYeon.. " your mum called as you were washing your dishes.. 
" Do you still want the Christmas Party?  " 

You froze. 

You forced a smile, " Why not? " 

" Don't you wanna celebrate with anyone? " she asked cautiously. 

You heart felt a breeze of cold. 

" No. " you gave a short reply. 

" I wanna celebrate with my love ones, " you tried to make yourself sound happy. 
" On this joyous ocasion. " 

Your mum pursed her lips, " Everything's fine right? " 
You nodded almost immediately. 
No details, anyways, generally you're fine. 
Not minding that every pain sliced across your heart when ever you think of him. 

" Yes.. " 
You continued washing the bowls. 






Christmas Party. 
Was barely one, 
Your mum called your relatives, it was just a simple dinner. 
Along with short replies. 

" JiYeon ah... What's your job?" your uncle asked. 
" Journalist. " You sliced a bite-sized piece of meat. 

Clanking sounds of utensils. 

"Yeon-ah.. Do you have a boyfriend?" 
"No. " 
You drank your water. 


"Merry Christmas. " You almost said monotonously. 
You presented a forced smile at your nephews and niece as you passed them your presents for them. 
Glees and screams came after that.. 
But your heart felt solemn. 







You were in your room, you found that box you brought back home. 
(refer to Chap 22 if anyone is not sure) 
You let your fingers run through the lid. 
You smiled as you felt the rough surface... 

"Merry Christmas Daehyun. " 


You gingerly opened the lid, and touched every object there. 

"Another Christmas without you. " 


After getting caught up in your emotions, 
Thinking of this " forbbiden love" that you're stuck with. 
How hard you've tried to move on... 
How hard you tried to over come your fears.. 
How hard it took for you to go through all that pain.. 
To see him in pain... 

You finally found the energy to stand. 
You aimlessly walk through the streets, got on board into buses, subway trains without knowing. 
You just held that box. 

You walked through crowds, you walked through blocks. 



And you found yourself standing at a door. 
That door was all too familar. 

"Hyung, I'll go first. " you heard a voice from inside. 
That voice was all too familar too. 



Before you knew it,... the door swing open. 
And that all too familar face was before you. 


You hurriedly proceed to run. 
Run Ji Yeon run. 

" Ji Yeon. " 
That voice made your feet stood rooted to the ground. 
Your hairs were standing. 
You could feel the amplification of your heart beat. 

Silence. 
Silence. 
You gulped. 

You tried..  
You tried to pull your feet away from the ground and run away again. 


Then... 

You heard foot steps approaching. 
It wasn't at a steady pace. 
It was accelerating.. 
The sound of the footsteps was getting louder. 


Then... 



His hands found his way around your shoulder. 
It immediately form a lock and trapped you in his embrace. 

"Please... " his voice croaked. 
You bit your lips. 
He was crying. 

" Don't leave again.. "