Daehyun POV

We were in the restaurant. 

” Excuse me, is Chef Joon inside? ” she asked a passing waiter. 

That waiter eyed at her suspiciously. 

” Well.. he is.. Do you want me to call him over ? “ she nodded. 

He left. 

Now she's being suspicious..
Chef Joon?!

"Who’s ..that Chef...Joon? "I asked cautiously.
Damn... how come she knows so many guys!!

She smirked, “My favourite oppa!”

I SHOULD BE YOUR Favourite oppa..
But.. Daehyun keep your cool!
She may have moved on..
She has the right to know other guys.. 
Keep it in....

Just nod.
So... I nodded. 
 

"JiYeon?" a husky voice called out.
I glared at him.
So,.. This.. is Chef Joon..
He looks too old for her though..
She likes older guys??
I...I am her oppa too!!

"Oppa! "....she hugged him.
Hold your horses Daehyun. Hold it all in...
She..She can call him oppa... it is fine. 

He chuckled, “Aigoo.. What’s with you?” 
She hugs you and you questioned her? 
My fist was curled up into a ball. 

She broke off the hug.
Grrrr... Finally.. 

"Oppa, urms.. "... 
Her voice got softer. 

I really hate seeing her with other guys. 
She's out here with me but talking to other guys.. 

Is she getting back at me? For noona? 
I saw her eyes just now when I was talking to noona..

Sigh.. 
Why are they talking for so long??

He ruffled her hair and made his way back into the kitchen.
Gosh,... don't touch her hair.. ONLY ME

I glared at him. He shouldn't touch her hair!

She giggled
Ohdear,.. Did she saw me glaring..
Keep your cool Daehyun, Keep your cool. 

She sat down,

"So.. "  I tried to talk... 
This is more awkward than I had thought it would be.. 
What should I say after two years of meeting? 

"I'm.. she hesitated a little, "happy to see you too. "
 

My eyes widen, "Sorry what?" 
Ohh..my reply at the interview. 
Damn.. it was so embarrassing. 
I saw her being put in such a difficult position, I thought I should lighten the mood.. 
I didn't like to see her uncomfortable, especially when with us. 
Or more importantly, because of me. 
But only silly words came out..  Arghs, so awkward. 
I nodded,..(Fumbles with fingers}...

I bit my lips, Is this my cue to speak now..

How are you? Should I say that.. 
Would it be awkward?
But.. as a friend, I could ask that right? 

"How are you? " I asked firmly to hide my nervousness.


Please.. don't say fine.. 
Please.. 


"Fine, "  she gave a faint smile
Damn.. 
"You? "

Ughs.. 
How will I ever be fine without you?
I nodded.

Conversation ended.


 

"I've... " she spoke.
My ears perked up, and I looked up, 

She paused. Was.. she hesitating to speak to me.. 
 

I tilt my head slightly to probe her to continue,

"I've arrived yesterday. Korea I mean, I reached Korea yesterday. "

I know.. I saw you.. 
It was so painful,.. 
But we have made it so far, 
I'm even having dinner with you now. 
I nodded. 

Conversation ended. 

 

"Urms.. B.A.P is promoting a new song." I tried to start another conversation..
She grinned, "Yeah, I've heard it. It's good." 

Conversation ended. 




Both of us took turns to take a sip of water..so awkward.. 
Several attempts of conversation and we're getting no where


THANKGOODNESS. 


The same waiter has arrived. 
He has set up the utensils on both tables. 
He left. 

Silence was still consuming the space between us.

He came back. 
He set down two plates of salads. 

Eat your greens Daehyun, eat it. 
Act busy. Gosh.. I hate vegetables. 
Damn, its so hard to chew. 
Ughs, the smell.. 

I took a peep at her, she was chewing slowly. 
She... must be feeling awkward too. 
Sighs, is this my fault? 
A dinner was a bad idea?

Start a conversation, ease the awkwardness now Daehyun. 
She... came from Australia to not for this.. Australia? YES her carreer! YES!
"So..you're a journalist now? " I asked with my mouth full. 
She chuckled and nodded.. Adorable. 

"I.. pursued it.. and urms, managed to ... " She keeps stuttering. 

Is it because of me? 
Was she worried how I would view her success? 
But I do wonder, 
I wonder if she never left me, will she have achieved her dream?
Will I achieve my dream too?

"to land in this job.. " She forced a smile. 

It's alright JiYeon, I understand.  I nodded. 

I stared at her... 
She still looks so beautiful. 
Two years have gone, but her beauty still remains. 
I don't mean beauty like just a pretty face.. 
But her inner beauty, just JiYeon being JiYeon and that's beautiful that way. 

If she was with me, would she still have such beauty? 
Was two years of absence a good thing or a bad thing? 
Both of us has achieved success without each other. 
Do I dare to request both of us together?? 

But I truly am, happy for her. 
Not just because I could see her, in person. 
But, because she's happy. At least I hope she is. 
I'm happy just like that. 

"I'm happy for you. " 
She... Blushed? 
Is my eyes seeing things? Or is it the lighting of the room? 

" I'm happy that you've achieved your dream. "
Truly, JiYeon. 
I'm proud of you. 
Not just as your lover, if I dare to take that title. 
But even as friends, that mere title of friends, knowing you for so long, your dreams and aspiration.
Your achievement today, I'm happy. 

was slightly opened for sometime. 
She seems to be in a daze. 

Do you not believe me JiYeon?

"T-Thankyou. "  she stuttered. 
Why does it seems so formal and foreign? 
Are we, at the very least, friends of more than seven years? 
Is time that powerful to let our friendship fade?

She immediately ducked her head down and chew on the last carrot on her plate. 
I guess... it is that powerful. 
I finished my Salad. 

The waiter appeared again. 
Two plates of steak. 

Did she.. ordered this? 
She remembers how much I love steak.
And to top it off, it is exactly grilled to perfection, just the way I like it. 
Just the way,.. we used to have them. 
Just the way. 
Just like the past. 

She giggled. 

I grinned, I am so silly when I see food.
"Whooa.. I missed this steak! " those words slipped out of my mouth. 
And the next thing I knew was that I was trying to swallow down that delicious steak. 
How tender it felt. 
Gosh,.. so goooood.. 

Wait.. Why is it so quiet? 
Is...she eating?

I slowly looked up and gave a smirk at the sight before me. 
" Why? " I was grinning so hard. 
I used my hands to support his chin and smirked at her. 
" You.. can't eat, because I'm too.. handsome? " 

Shoot. 
Wait, did I say the wrong words? 
Are we that comfortable to say that? 
Ohnoo.. Ahh.. 7 years of friendship, 
Remember Daehyun, its fine. 

She grinned. 
She was biting her lips, and was quite silent for a while. 

" Yes. " 

Yes,... she said yes. 
WAIT WHAT 
SHE SAID YES? 
Did... she mean that? 
I mean, I know I'm handsome (chuckles) 
But... the fact that she dares to say that... does it mean... we're no longer awkward?
I found myself chuckling, and she was trying to hide her blushing cheeks. 
I chuckled harder. 

She nervously tries to cut her steak to continue eating. 
But she was struggling. 
I grinned, This Ji Yeon, still cannot eat steak without me cutting for her. 
I let my hand approach her plate and helped her to cut into smaller pieces. 
Just like how I used to help her. 

I returned back a smirk, and brought the plate to her side and continued eating. 


" We'll only end promotions in three weeks time. "
I tried to strike another comfortable conversation.

She nodded, " Yeah.. " 
She stayed silent a while before adding on,  " I like your new song. " 
I beamed, this conversation is getting better. 
"I happened to read up on you guys, " she was trying hard to maintain eye contact. 
Thankyou JiYeon. 

"I saw some of the variety shows you've went. The interviews you've been to .. " 

Wait what?
She... didn't saw that... 
No.. wait. 

" I-I.. was researching on questions to ask you guys.. " 
She said firmly. 
A little too firmly, this calls for suspicion. 

Researching? 
Jiyeon does extensive research. 
She has always been good at researching.
She... must have seen the video. 
Ohno.. what does this means now? 

"You guys are so popular, many questions have been taken away,.. I had such a hard time crafting questions. " she added.
Was she...joking? 


" I will make up with her and get back together" my own words chimed in my mind. 
I fear,... 
JiYeon, I really wanna be with you. 
Happy and loving. 
But.. I have this fear in me. 


"Did you happen to.. see .." I asked cautiously.. 
If she didn't see it, and I say now.. what if she sees? 
Since... she didn't have any big reaction.. it should be fine. 
Right?

I hesistated, realising I just left it hanging, " I mean.. urm you're a Baby right? I mean.. our fan.
Yes, our fan name, Baby. You're still one ya? " 

Don't say anymore. 
Remember, it was just a show. 
Although that was the truth. 
Just live in denial that she didn't know about it. 


She nodded, and gave a smile. 

I don't really mind that much if you're not a Baby, just... 
I hope,... even if we can never be together, I don't want you to leave me again. 
Living in the spot light for so long, I don't mind staring you afar from the seats, with you in the spot light. 

If that's the only way for me to express my love. 

I nodded in response. 

" I'm... " I said suddenly and looked up, " JiYeon's fan. " 
I don't know what made me say this. 
I just want her to know. 
I am, and always will be supporting you. 
Like how you did for us. 
Even before B.A.P was formed. 
 

Her eyes widen, I grinned. 

"I'm your fan. "  I emphasised again. 

She smiled and did a small nod, 
"Thankyou. " 

"You should have a fan name! " I wanted to . Honestly, I love calling her a Baby. Hehehee
She should give me a nickname... 
Maybe something cute. Hehehes!
 

She giggled. 
I love the sound of her giggling. 

" I don't need fans.. " 
Gasp, but I am your no.1 fan, you don't need me? 

This Jiyeon! I I feigned a shocked face, " HEYYYYY! " 

She giggled. 
" Maybe.. I'll call them.. " 

"BJY! " I exclaimed. 
I really got to stop speaking out my mind. 
Spilling words without knowing.. 
I wanted a more loving name, maybe Jaki... or Honey... 
Aish, what am I thinking? 
Sighs, since I've said this... Let's go with this. 

She gave me a straight face.
"You.. wanna be called that? " 

I was controlling that urge in me to grin.
Jaki ya,...  " I wanna be called handsome. " 

"Aish.. YAH JUNG DAEHYUN! " She tried to smack me and I dodged. 
We're back, I hope. 
Back to how we used to be. 

Both of us finished the steak. 

The plates were cleared, glasses were filled. 
Awkward moment was here again. 
At least, at the very least, it was better than before. 

"Do.. you have anything to ask me? " she asked suddenly. 

Huh?
What does she means by that? 
Is that a test? 

But I do have lots to ask her.
How are you first... 
Then maybe, if she has eat well.. sleep well... 
Was she bullied?
Was she sick? 


And most importantly.. did she found someone that love her better than me? 

"Why... " .... my mouth spoke on its own again. 

But Daehyun.. you can't. 
You can't ask her if she has found someone. 
It's ... 
You're not ready to hear her answer. 

Just ask a simple question. 
Thinking back to the day she left me, 
How she planned everything..
She.. Oooh!!
She wanted me to give her the sweater. 
The one she liked so much. 

" Why did you want that sweater I wore that day? " 


" The sweater? " she repeated my words. 
I nodded. 

I hope I don't have to explain which sweater, it would only bring back memories of that very day, and it may hurt us both again. She gave a sigh. 

Is this a hard question?
She... is not hurting from my question right?

" Is.. there anything else you want to know? " 

Ohno... 
A better question. 
A neutral one. 

" Do you.. " 

Sighs... what should I ask? 
A neutral one. 
Something people always ask when their friends live abroad... 
Urms.. 
How's the life there? It feels too general and insincere. 
How's the people?? What am I asking? 
Oh... right! People! Is that discrimination there? 
It has been raised a couple of times on this variety show...Hello Counsellor. 
My Ji Yeon, you aren't not having a hard time right?

" Do you have friends in Australia? " 

She stared at me. 

"Huh? " 

I blinked at her. 
Why did she react that way? 
Was she expecting those taboo questions?

"Friends? I wondered if you're lonely there.. " I added. 

She blinked her eyes and grinned. 
I swear, I think I just stopped breathing for a second. 


" I do. Really nice ones," she jokingly added, " I'm not that anti-social. " 
Of course not darling, you've always been such a good friend, not an ultimate social butterfly but you're always good with getting along with strangers. But still.. 
I and grinned, " You never know, you only hang out with us. " 



She smiled. 
But she gave a soft sigh. 

" That sweater."  she started off. 
She stopped. 
You're not hurting from telling me are you?

"I got that sweater for you, do you remember? " she looked at me and I nodded in response. 
I wouldn't forget it. 

" It was my first gift for that I used the money I earned from work to buy. " 
I know. It hurts me so much to see you working so hard. 

" There was one time.. " She started her story. 
" I was working.. And an old man walked in. " 

She didn't look into my eyes. 
Is this going to be a hard story to tell? 
Jaki... I mean JiYeon, I am fine if you don't tell me... 

"He asked me if I know anywhere that can fix up a sweater. " 
Her voice had a small crack. 
Ji..Yeon. 

"That sweater was torn, and dirty. It was basically.. un-wearable. " 

She paused. 

" So.. I asked him. Why don't you buy a brand new one instead? He... gave me an angry look, .. he soften his expression then he start to tell me the reason. " 
She gave me a short glance before continuing. 

"It was the only sweater that his wife had knit for him. " She gulped. 

" He says, sweaters are good gifts, especially knitted ones. With every stitch, a piece of memory is knitted onto the sweater. The time taken to knit a sweater could last as long as a month. That's a month worth of memories. Sometimes, there are beautiful memories that brings smile to her face as she knits, these form pretty pattern on the sweater. Sometimes, she may knit with sorrowful feelings and cause her to cry, this stains the sweater with her tears. Sometimes she knits when she's upset with him. This forms tight stitching with her anger. "  She paused. 

Whoa... 
I.. never knew that gift meant so much. 
Does she meant that she wanted the sweater back because it had all her feelings? 
She wanted to take it away with her? 
But... 

" But.. "  her voice trembled. " it was a sweater of love, he told me. Since she has left, it was the only piece of thing that she has left him with. Yet it was something that he could use to remember her. How she smile, was reflected on the sweater. How she cries, is found on the sweater, and how she was when she's angry, is shown on the sweater. " 


Jaki... I mean Ji Yeon.. 
But... I want to use it to remember you as well.. 

She didn't continue. 

No wonder.. It is a hard question. 
I'm sorry Ji Yeon. 
I just wanted to make you comfortable. 
All I wanted was to be like the past. 
How we used to be. 
Even if we can no longer call each other lovers. 
I didn't want you to relive the pain you have moved on from. 

She finally looked at me after staring into space for a while. 
I smiled. 

For some odd reason, she triggered my tear glands. 
JiYeon.. Please don't be in pain. Please... 

I smiled, a forced smile. 

" You've never told me this story before. " I tried to ease the tension from the story. 

But a little part of my heart ached. 
I thought I knew everything about her. 
but.. I guess I was wrong. 

" I.. I.. didn't tell you because I wanna see how you view this gift. " 
She kept silent for a while. 
" Sometimes, actions of love need not be explained. " she added. 

My heart ached. 
Both of us doing out of love. Aren't we? 
Love is so silly. 

I couldn't say anything but nod. 


" I like that story. " I said after seeing she was silent. I  my lips. 

The tension.. was still there. 
My fault. 
I shouldn't have asked. 

But she.. smiled. 
 

I miss her smiles. 


 

HAPPY NEW YEAR! 
It's like already 2am now T.T
I wanted to post this as a new year gift! :D 
I really wanna make the story moved on, but I just reached home like a few hours ago.. and I started writing. 
I wanted to combine chapter 31 and 32 for Daehyun POV into one.. but I couldn't TT
I tried to make this as long as possible to make up for my absentee for so longggg... 
I hope this wasn't too bad >.< 

Nonetheless, as usual. 
I really love the support and love for this story. 
Honestly, there was a couple of times I feel like giving up, cause their love is sooooo hard to fight. 
But you guys made writing this possible. 
And the most amazing thing is, how my story could led me to meet such wonderful people. 
Even my silent readers to people whom I'm talking with regularly. 
I love everyone of you. 

In this coming new year, I wish all the best for everyone. 
It will be a great year! 
God bless :D