67) 'Love always defeats darkness'


‘They say darkness will never rule your world, if love is there to lighten it up..  But what if love itself lost the power to fight the darkness? What’s there left to hope for? Can love escape this prison? Can love shine again?’

“Wah… so beautiful..”

Me: “He he.. thank you..”

“I wonder from where do you get all these ideas.. you should write a book..”

Me: “Oh.. come on, Luhan! I am not that good..”

Luhan: “Yes, you are.. hey.. how about some bubble tea? You love that..”

Me: “Um.. yeah sure..”

I took my bag and we head off to Luhan’s favourite place, where the best bubble tea was served.. I also liked it very much, but I will always feel this strange ache inside my heart whenever I would drink.. I really don’t understand why..

Luhan keeps telling me I’ve been in love with bubble tea more than I was with him..How can he know that? Even I can’t tell exactly what’s in my mind, in my heart.. no matter how hard I try, I just can’t find myself.

I sometimes feel I’ve loved him ever since we’ve met, but then, in some moments, I think we’re just strangers walking on the same path.. How can someone’s feelings change like that? Why am I so different? Why do I always feel as if  I am doing something wrong, as if… I’m constantly hurting someone?

Luhan: “Oh my…”

Me: “What happened?”

Luhan: “Suho asked us to meet him..”

Me: “Well.. go.. I’ll return home..”

Luhan: “What? No no.. just wait for the rain to stop.. meanwhile enjoy some bubble tea..”

Me: “Alone??”

Luhan: “Yah.. you never know when the sunlight will make its way through the thick clouds..”

He pinched my cheek gently then head off to the exit, turning and waving before closing the door..  I was wondering what was all this about.. sunlight.. clouds… what was he saying?

I moved forward to order the drink.. The guy in front of me was really irritating, kept confusing me with all those ingredients.. I couldn’t keep up with him.. He made me feel insecure, yelling like that.. I just didn’t know which tea..

Guy: “Yah.. lady! Are you going to order? There are people waiting in line!”

Me: “Why are you screaming like that? I wanna buy.. I just don’t recall that tea I once tried..”

“The choco sensation one is the best choice for such a bad weather..”

Hearing that soft voice, I turned around to see a nice, tall boy, with brown hair and almond shaped eyes, his lips slowly before smiling at me.. He got near me and ordered two bubble teas.. I said I’ll pay mine, but he insisted.. I took the drink and looked for a place.. Hm.. only two seats…

“Guess.. we’ll have to sit there.. do you mind?”

Me: “It’s ok..”

“Kept on raining for the past days..”

Me: “Yes.. as if.. something is just not right.. ”

“Hm.. maybe..  there has to be a meaning behind it.. sorry.. I don’t know how to call you..”

Me: “I am _____! And you?”

“My name is Sehun! Nice to meet you.. I guess this weather still has something good to it.. I get to meet new people..”

Me: “He he.. you know.. I find you quite familiar.. have we met before?”

Sehun: “Um.. maybe I look like someone you know…”

Me: “I don’t recall anyone.. oh.. look at the rain drops..”

Sehun: “Beautiful.. like tiny tears drying slowly while dancing their way on the window.. ”

Me: “Hm.. tears of a lost heart..”

*

Luhan: “You look so happy..”

Me: “I just.. he he.. I’ve met someone today.. he was so nice..”

Luhan: “I see.. well.. at least you weren’t alone.. sorry for leaving..”

Me: “Don’t worry.. you know? He likes bubble tea too.. The choco sensation is his favourite.. we like the same flavour..”

Luhan: “Do you? Never heard you saying that before.. ”

Me: “Of course.. I always drink that.. especially during rainy times.. it just makes me feel happier he he..”

I kept on talking with him about Sehun, trying to not forget any detail.. Luhan was quite amazed that someone could change me like that.. as if.. it was meant for us to meet..

Me: “What are you saying?”

Luhan: “Nothing.. don’t mind me.. well.. we should sleep.. it’s kind of late.. I’m going in my room..”

Me: “Ok.. good night..”

After he went inside his bedroom, I layed on the sofa, thinking about Sehun.. He really was a nice person.. I just.. I don’t know why was I feeling this way… Luhan didn’t seem very pleased.. Why would he? His wife talks about meeting another man.. How stupid is that??

I tried to not mention Sehun anymore, although from that day on, he was always in my mind, always making my heart ache, making me nervous if I didn’t see him,  talk with him, feel him near.. I kept meeting him wherever I went, as if he was following me or something..

I didn’t know what was happening to me.. I felt so calm being by his side.. I couldn’t even think about Luhan anymore.. How could I be such a person? Why couldn’t I feel that love that Luhan said it used to unite us? When did all change? Why did Sehun appear in my life?

Everything was so confusing.. I felt I was slowly sinking in a dreadful darkness, not able to breath.. I started to love another man.. in fact.. I felt I’ve always loved him.. We had so much in common, we got to know each other so well that we could easily tell when one needed the other..

Whenever I was with him, I always had this strange feeling that we’ve seen all those places before, that once our love bloomed there, that we were just reviving a long lost story, which couldn’t be written anymore.. I trusted him, even if he always avoided talking about his own life.. But.. I just kept feeling guilty…

I would wake up every night, trembling and crying because of some moments that I felt I’ve lived before with Sehun.. like.. in another life.. I felt I was trap in a strange world, in which my love for Sehun transformed me in the worst person ever, because I knew how much I was hurting Luhan.. And he didn’t  have any idea..

*

I just had to stop all this.. I decided to call Sehun, asking him to meet at our place, when I heard noises coming from the kitchen.. I got near the door, listening..  Not even the most sharped knife could have hurt my heart more than those voices were doing it right now..

“You can’t continue like this.. you’ve tried everything.. she’s not reacting..”

“God.. I know Luhan! But I have to keep trying.. I need her!”

Luhan: “She’s not coming back.. too much time has passed, Sehun..”

Sehun: “Don’t say that!”

Luhan: “What is there left? I can’t think of anything.. she’s lost in that darkness… and she can’t get out if not..”

Sehun: “If not what?”

Luhan: “Maybe.. we should try.. yes.. we should make her live those moments again..”

Sehun: “No.. I can’t see her like that again.. I’ve been trying to keep her away from all that and now you want me to.. no…”

Luhan: “And for how long can you do that? Nothing works.. she has to feel that again in order to get back to us..”

Sehun: “But.. ”

Luhan: “Listen.. this is the only way to get your wife back!”

I walked backwards slowly, widening my eyes.. Wife? Whose wife? Who were they talking about? Why was Sehun here? How did he know Luhan? What if.. did Sehun tell him anything?? I tried to get away, knocking down the vase on the hall.. The noise startled the boys.. They came in the hall, seeing me getting outside..

Sehun kept running after me, telling me to come back.. I will not.. Why did he do this? Why was he here? Did he plan to tell Luhan? Why would he do this to me? I know I was wrong.. I know I’ve hide it  from Luhan, but he didn’t have the right to hurt him, saying all this.. I should have ended everything when I first felt things were getting out of control…

Sehun: “Stop.. please!”

Me: “Stay away from me! Why did you come here? You wanted to tell Luhan?”

Sehun: “Listen to me!”

Me: “No.. leave me! Let me go!”

“Yah! Why are you messing with the girl?”

Two men approached us from the park nearby.. Sehun grabbed my hand, forcing me to get back to the apartment, but got pushed away by one of those guys..

Sehun: “Please mind your own business, sir!”

Man: “Yah.. don’t you sir me, rascal.. what did you try to do?”

Sehun: “This is not what you’re thinking.. she’s..”

Man: “Alone.. near a park.. during night time.. what does that mean??”

Sehun: “Step aside.. ____! Come here! I have to talk with you!”

One of the man stood in front of me, trying to protect me, while the other one kept pushing Sehun, until he couldn’t stand it anymore and punched the guy.. I was about to tell them this was a misunderstanding , when I just felt everything around me fading away..

I could now see Sehun being beaten up by two guys, dressed in black with a mask on their faces.. We were in a total different place.. I went to him, calling for help, but one man pushed me away, while the other took out a knife trying to frighten Sehun..
 
Me: “Please leave him alone! Stop it! NO! Don’t do that!”

I kept screaming and crying, falling on the ground.. Sehun got near me, taking me in his arms, trying to calm me down.. The park reappeared slowly and I could also see Luhan running towards us, while the men stepped back, bowing their heads..

Sehun: “Calm down!”

Me: “They’ll kill you.. no.. I don’t want to.. stop it.. leave him alone..”

Sehun: “Shh… no one is here.. come to your senses!”

Me: “Thieves.. knife.. no.. stop.. ”

Sehun: “Luhan! Why is she acting like this?”

Luhan: “Guess she’s recalling that night… I’m gonna call the doctor..”

Me: “Don’t leave me!”

Sehun: “I won’t, my love!”

*

Luhan: “Are you sure you don’t wanna come in?”

Sehun: “No.. what if she will react the same way? I couldn’t stand seeing her like that again..”

Luhan: “But this time she remembered.. she won’t do that again..”

Sehun: “You go.. last time you were the only one who calmed her down..”

Luhan: “Ok… I’ll wake her up..”

The noise of an opened door made me startle.. I opened my eyes slowly, looking at a smiling Luhan, who kept patting my hand.. I got up, trying to figure it out where I was.. Where was Sehun? What happened??

Luhan: “He’s fine.. ”

Me: “But.. the thieves.. the..”

Luhan: “Nothing happened.. everything is alright..”

Me: “Where is he?”

Luhan: “He’s outside...”

He went to the door, calling Sehun inside.. I could feel my heart beating fast, when seeing him safe and sound.. He got near me and took me in his arms… Luhan left the room quietly..

Me: “Oh, thank God! I thought..”

Sehun: “It’s ok.. calm down.. how are you feeling?”

Me: “I have an awful headache.. Sehun… I am sorry.. how could I forget you?”

Sehun: “I’ll tell you everything.. remember that night? When we were attacked? You tried to help me, hitting one of the guys with a stone.. but then.. I.. just saw you.. laying there.. and all that blood.. and then.. when you woke up.. you were so shocked to see me.. I just..”

He began crying slowly… I hugged him tightly, caressing his hair.. I could remember that night.. and all those moments with him.. those were not just  a dream.. those were my memories.. I was his wife.. that’s why I always felt I knew him.. that’s why I got so close to him.. that’s why I felt so strange whenever he was around..

After that night, I couldn’t recognise him anymore.. I tried to hide my fear in Luhan’s arms.. The doctors said that sometimes people with amnesia will choose someone as a protector, feeling secure only near them.. and it was wise to not force me, or I could end up having a bigger shock..
 
That’s why Luhan helped Sehun to make me come back.. They’ve planned to make me revive my life with Sehun.. They made me believe I was Luhan’s wife, since I would only feel calm while being with him.. And after I would get better, Sehun will slowly enter my life, trying to make me remember..

Since nothing worked, Luhan hired two men to remake the attack, without telling Sehun.. He called him in the apartment, knowing that I could easily hear their conversation.. Thanks to him,  I could get out from that darkness that trapped my mind and heart.. I will never be able to thank him enough for helping us.. He was indeed Sehun’s best friend..

*

I was looking at the menu, trying to pick a new flavour.. Sehun kept on laughing, making me nervous.. I asked him what was so funny.. He replied that I’ll never be able to choose a new one, because only the choco sensation could make a difference.. because it was the bubble tea that brought us together.. and I will always choose that one to cherish our love..

Me: “Hm.. we’ll see.. excuse… I would like to have..”

Boy: “Yes? ”

Me: “Um.. that.. well.. this one.. ah.. you know what? Just give me the choco sensation bubble tea!”

Sehun: “Ha ha.. told you..”

We took the drinks and head off to the park, walking slowly.. I wrapped my arm around his, sipping my tea.. It was a nice shiny day and the cheerful atmosphere coming from the kids playing nearby made us feel happy and calm.. He kept making funny faces at me, pointing to those little angels.. I kind of figure it out what he meant..

Me: “Yah.. stop that!”

Sehun: “Come on.. I wanna drink bubble tea with my daughter..”

Me: “How do you know we will have a daughter?”

Sehun: “I just know it… because I want one..”

Me: “Well.. you can find out in about 8 months..”

He almost choked himself with the tea.. He turned and gave me a what-did-you-say look.. I pinched his cheek, laughing… well… I was quite clear.. kids kept running around us, as he lifted me up, shouting out my name..

Sehun: “God! I love you so much!”

I knew it.. Thanks to his love I was now here.. living again.. They say darkness will never rule your world, if love is there to lighten it up..  And even if love would struggle to fight that darkness, in the end hope will not die.. and love will keep on shining..

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