Darkness. One of the few things that can effectively cloud the mind. Sadness usually just gets you down, but there is a point some people may cross. Depression, like the plague, or a dark ominous cloud, consumes all happy thoughts and replaces them with thoughts of death, pain and loss. And just like all bad things in life, it's easy to get, much harder to get rid of.

 

I'm readjusting my bed sheets, and fluffing my pillows. My head pounds as an imaginary being beats me with constant blows, like a pulse of pain.

 

What should I do?

 

It's already going to be tough, but more than one real job with have to be accomplished. I applied to a few already. I just need a response. I look down at Casey, and my lips curl into a smile.

 

Her small body is curled up to fit her dog bed perfectly. Her big beagle ears remain limp by her side as she inhales and exhales. Her eyes are closed and her overall sound is quiet.

 

Why can't the Matokis be like this.

 

I finish cleaning my room and head back to the guest room. Within the TWO AND A HALF hours that I ended up giving them, they manage to finish. The room is back to it's former glory.

 

To the eyes of a stranger.

 

To me, everything is messed up. The vase is gone, pictures are missing, the bed's covers has been changed. There is a certain air of hollowness. A room that had the most amount of life and colour now remains simple and bland. 

 

Six Matokis and a 17 year old boy stand at attention against the wall. I walk up to Inhyung first.

 

"It's 6:10. If you don't hurry home, your parents will worry." I pat his shoulder and smile. He gives me a quick hug before dashing desperately out the room. I listen for the sound of my front door closing.

 

Click.

 

"WHAT WERE YOU GUYS DOING?!" I yell, looking down on the Matokis.

 

"We... Um, uh... We were trying to fix something." Dada answers.

 

I close my eyes and pinch the bridge if my nose in frustration. I'm not a big fan of punishments, but some in cases, like this one, it's needed.

 

"Joko, no more discovery channel. Keke, no more desserts. Toto, you'll sleep with the others from now on and not in my bed. Dada, no more story time. Tats... Stay away from mirrors. And Shishi-"

 

"There is nothing you can take away from me." He glares at me. I swear it's either that or he's smirking under his mask.

 

"Oh really now? Fine, I won't take anything away... You will, everyday, go and check on my flowers and make sure there are no more weeds!"

 

"WHAT-"

 

"And none of you are coming with me to school for two days."

 

Shishi's face remains furious, but my Favourite Five's faces fall like rocks in thin air. Toto looks like he's about to cry, Dada curls up into a ball and Tats, Keke and Joko sit against the wall and sigh.

 

"I'm sorry, but it needs to be done."

 

•  •  •

 

I make everyone's breakfast and quickly finish my own. I rush upstairs, pack my bag and grab the phone.

 

"Inhyung, I won't be able to walk with you to school today... Two job interviews... I know, I'm really nervous... Ah, thanks... Bye." I hang up and check my watch.

 

School starts at eight thirty. My first interview is in half an hour, at 7:00. My second one starts at 7:45. I should be able to get buses to each on time. I fix my hair and walk back into the kitchen.

 

The six Matokis, in order from Shishi to Toto, sit in a semicircle around a green ceramic plate, a stack of small pancakes in front of each of them. Their faces are glum as they deliberately pick each pancake up and slowly places it to their face, only to put it down again and sigh. Toto notices me and a a flicker of hope flashes in his eyes, but I shake my head and he sinks further into sadness. I give my FF soft kisses on the head and Shishi a nod before kissing Casey goodbye and heading out the door.

 

•  •  •

 

"Do you have any prior job experience?" The man asks.

 

The room is small, but still quite intimidating. I stand before a man and a woman while the other applicants for the job, five in total, are lined up behind me in another room, sitting relaxed since they've already done their interview. I stand alone in front of who I hope become my bosses. 

 

"I have done babysitting and a paper route, but that's all I have to offer."

 

"Right..." The woman writes it down and looks at me.

 

I freeze under her gaze. Her intense blue eyes bore down into souls behind small glasses. , affected by age, can either tear my world apart or shine a new light with only a few words.

 

"Do you have a cellphone?" She asks.

 

"No ma'am." I reply.

 

"Why?"

 

"I have no one to call."

 

"How so?"

 

"My parents are dead."

 

She nods and writes it down. "How old are you?"

 

"Eighteen."

 

"What I you have in your hand?"

 

"Math. I have a test in a week, so I thought I would study to get my nerves down."

 

"What are you doing now?" The woman holds out her hand and I pass her my text book.

 

"I'm in AP calculus."

 

"Already?" She raises an eyebrow and looks through the text book. She gives it back to me and smiles. "You may go take your seat outside with the others."

 

I bow and do as she says. The two talk for a while. I nervously check my watch. The time the next bus comes is getting dangerously close. I can't miss this, or else I can count myself-

 

"Thank you all for coming. You all have amazing application skills." Says the man with a smile. He steps out of the room, followed by the woman, who carries a stern face.

 

"It was all great, but not what we wanted. You may all go now. Don't expect a phone call." She says and waves them all away.

 

I'm now depending everything on my next job interview. I bow to the two and start to leave when:

 

"He-Jin, please stay a little." I hear the woman say.

 

"Although you do lack compared to the others, your enthusiasm and hard working aura make you an easy pick. You will work as the 7-10:30 pm secretary for me every Tuesday, Wednesday and Friday. You must come in proper clothes, proper work ethic and on time. I do not tolerate any disobedience if this, alright?" The man says and I nod.

 

These two are like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde!

 

"Come half an hour early on Friday so I can give you a tour." The two show me out and I rush to catch my bus.

 

•  •  •

 

"You came hear early." A man stands out of a Chinese food restaurant.

 

He wears casual clothing, standing two heads taller than me. His hair is jet black and his eyes covered with square black glasses. He looks no older than 26 and quite handsome. 

 

"Yes sir."

 

"Don't call me sir. I'm Han, and you are..."

 

"He-Jin. Nice to meet you, Mr.?"

 

"No, just Han. I'm the owner of this restaurant." He points to the sign above his head. "Your first day will be Monday next week. You will work 3-5:00 pm shifts on Mondays and Wednesdays and 10 am to 1 pm shifts on a Saturday. Don't late!"

 

"Wait! Don't you have to ask for my background, how old I am, stuff like that?"

 

"You came hear early, that's enough for me." He passes me an apron, a shirt and a skirt. "This will be your uniform. See ya!"

 

•  •  •

 

"I'M SO TIRED!!" I scream, slamming the door behind me and lazily throwing my bag on the couch.

 

"Is that going to be your catch phrase from now on?" Tats ask, jumping up onto my lap.

 

"I really missed you guys at school, this morning." I pull the pink masked bunny into a hug and lie down as the others (except Shishi) come down from upstairs. I look at them. Even though they seem to be a bit happier, they still look depressed. I can see that in anyone. "Why are you guys so sad nowadays?"

 

"HyoJae told us..." Tats starts, but he trails off. I watch as his gaze drifts to my wrists, and my worst nightmare becomes a reality.

 

I sit up and stare in horror at the six.

 

"You knew?"

 

They all nod and climb onto my lap. "We will be here for you from now on and forever, He-Jin-ah. You don't need to be sad anymore. You don't need to hurt yourself." Tats lies down on my stomach.

 

"Yeah! Noona is the prettiest, and the nicest, and the bestest! Toto is here for you!" The blue matoki climbs onto my shoulder and snuggles himself into my neck.

 

The others do the same, causing tears to flow endlessly down my face. Shishi climbs onto my lap and points to his head.

 

"We are staying to make sure YOU stay fine. None of us will ever hurt you, so don't do it to yourself. Where's my kiss?"

 

We all laugh and I peck him gently between the ears. He tsks and refuses to look me the the eyes after that!

______________