Appa and I were at loggerheads for weeks on end. I didn't like the way that he babied me. I wasn't a child anymore, I should be in control of my own future. I should be able to make my own decisions on things that affected my future. I should have the final say on what I want my life to turn out like. I shouldn't have to run everything past Appa. I was almost finished my final exams, I wasn't in kindergarten anymore.

School in England was very different than the schooling in Korea. Second level education ended earlier in England than in Korea, so by the time summer comes around I will be able to attend College.

Switching between educational systems was challenging to say the least. Maths was the same everywhere, but all the other subjects were different. The most troublesome thing would definitely be the language that it was taught in, though.

Don't get me wrong, I was perfectly fluent in Korean and English and I could speak the tongues with ease, but there was a little thing called habit that kept getting in the way.

Nana and I kept answering the teacher in Korean on the first day back, since our minds worked in both languages. It was natural to us that we understood them and then we would reply, without even thinking about what we were saying. Therefore, there were a few incidents where we accidently spoke in Korean, not even realising what we were doing wrong, until we heard the snickers of our classmates. It was mortifying, to say the least.

However we powered through it, and we're mostly back to normal now. I had a mishap where I was talking to a relative who lived somewhere in Mokpo on the phone, and because I had been so concentrated on speaking English the past few weeks, I had ended up accidentally speaking English on the phone in reply to them.

Since their English wasn't all that great, they were a little stunned to say the least. They had asked me to repeat myself, and I did so, a little confused for the reason why, but I did so in English. It wasn't until Appa informed me that I was speaking English that I realised and I had hastily apologised to my cousins.

I decided that today was the day that I would ask Appa about the possibility of me returning to Seoul. Nana had already asked her parents, and they were okay with it, but they wanted to enforce a conditions about her living there. One being that she couldn't be by herself, I had to be with her.

Nana had placed some not so sublte hints when ever she was around Appa. She kept heavily hinting that she wanted so badly to go back to Korea, but she could only do so if I went along with her.

Appa and I weren't talking though, so she got few opportunities to do this, but whenever she did get a chance, she seized it quicker than you could count to ten.

*              *             *

"Abeoji?" I asked catiously, and his head shot up from where it was buried in the Sunday Herald. 

"Joy? You're talking to me now? What do you want?" He asked me dubiously.

I pouted and I took the seat opposite him at the kitchen table. I warmed my hands around the thick porcelain of the china tea cup.

"I want to talk to you about my return to Seoul." I told him in an even and calm voice. I needed to keep my face and not let this turn into a shouting match. If that happened, I would only re-enfource Appa's idea and arguement that I was too young to move to another country.

"This again? Why do keep bringing it up?" Appa asked in an exasperated voice, and his face dropped about three feet.

"Because I really want to go back. What do I have here?" I asked. "Nothing of worth."

"Nothing of worth?" Appa asked and his face darkened by about twenty shades. "You count your Mother as nothing of worth? You want to let go of all the memories of her?"

"Umma wanted me in Korea, she was the one who helped me." I told him coldly. How dare he accuse me of such things? "Moving isn't blasphemy. You need to learn to let go of her. I will never forget Umma, but I refuse to hold a torch for her and hope that she'll still come home like you do. I'm old enough now. When I finish school, if I choose to go Seoul for college, you won't be able to stop me. Wouldn't you rather know that I am safe with your blessings to be there?"

"What did you say?" Appa's eyes and tone were dangerous, and I knew that the conversation had taken a turn for the worse.

"I want to go back to Korea. There is nothing here for us anymore. Umma is buried in Korea, we only have memories here." I tried, determined not to make him blow up.

"Memories are the most important thing, Joy. Without our memories, we are just a shell of our former selves." Abeoji told me, the wisdom of his forty years of life coming out in that moment.

"What about my memories in Seoul? I made some friends there, Appa. Friends I want to keep for a long time, I will never lose my memories of Umma, but I've already lost her. I haven't lost my friends yet, but I'm afraid that I will." I told him sincerely.

"Joy, just stop it now, I don't want you going back to Korea." Appa said forcefully and got up from the kitchen table. "I don't want to talk about this anymore. You're not going back, that's final!"

"Why? Why are you stopping me?" I asked and stood up too, slamming my palms against the wooden surface of the table.

Appa didn't reply and headed towards the door.

"Ergh, I hate you!" I shouted and at him, and bumped his shoulder while he stood frozen at the door.

*               *              *

"Nana, it ." I complained to her over the phone I had stolen from the front room.

"You just have to bear through it, Joy. He'll come around eventually." Nana consoled me.

"Hopefully I can persuade Ahjussi when he comes over." I tried to sound cheerful, but I failed miserably.

"He's coming over?" Nana practically shrieked.

"Uh huh, I told you this, Nana. Don't you ever listen? He's coming over for business and Appa offered for him to stay with us instead of him getting a hotel." I told her for the hundredth time.

"Really? Maybe I can drop a few hints around him too." Nana said thoughtfully.

"Yeah, because that'll go down well." I said, and rolled my eyes at her, even though she couldn't see me.

"Why not? It's a smart plan." Nana protested.

"Yeah, and everything will just be fine and dandy then." I muttered.

"Whatever. When's he coming?" Nana quizzed.

"Um, next week, I think. Hey, Nana, have you been talking to Zelo lately?" I asked as an afterthought.

"Maybe, why?" Nana asked, and her tone mirrored Appa's from earlier today perfectly - she had gotten suspisicion down to a tee.

"Because I want to know." I whined. "I'm so bored at home, you can at least tell me what is happening in your life! What happened with the article?"

"As far as I know, they had to release a statement because it got a lot of attention, but Zelo wouldn't tell me what it said, he told me that I didn't need to know." Nana scoffed. "He wouldn't even tell me after I begged him."

"Why? What's wrong with it?" I asked in curiosity.

"How am I supposed to know? Zelo won't tell me!" Nana snapped at me.

"Why are you getting so angry?" I asked in surprise.

"Because I'm worried that something isn't quite right, and that's why he won't tell me." Nana whined, and I could tell that the worry had subdued her anger for now.

"Nana-yah, I'm sure that there is no reason to worry. Zelo would tell you if something was wrong, just trust me . . . and him, for that matter." I reassured her.

"It's supposed to be the other way, I'm supposed to be the one comforting while you have a mental breakdown about what Daehyun may or may not have said." Nana laughed and I smiled lightly.

I knew it sounded bad and perhaps extremely naïve of me, but I trusted him. I'm not even sure if I had a reason to, but after we talked on the phone, I wanted to believe that everything would be alright, that everything would magically fix itself. I was being unrealistic. There was no way that could happen.

What were the chances of a solution just magically appearing out of no where?

Zero to nil. Nothing. Nada. Zip. I answered my own question in my head.

*               *             *

"Joy! Get down here!"

That was the first time Appa had spoken to me in four days. I know that I hurt him with my words when we fought, but I couldn't help it. When I get angry, things that I don't mean just come out of my mouth. It's my self-defence mechanism. It's an awful type of defence. My words can really sting sometimes and they can be full of venom.

Nevertheless though, I plodded down the flight of stairs, I was walking alot heavier than someone of my size should be. I dragged my feet into the sitting room where I knew Appa was bound to be.

I got the biggest shock of my life though when I saw that he wasn't alone. There was two other people with them.

"This is my daughter, Joyce." Appa stood up and walked up to me. He put an arm around my shoulder and pulled me in close beside him and squeezed my arm. "She used to live in Seoul, you know."

"I know, I believe we met before." The second person with a familar voice said.

"You have?" Appa asked in confusion.

"Of course they have, he works with me." Ahjussi told my Dad.

I just stared wide eyed at the second person. I so did not want to see this person now, or ever for that matter. I did not like this person.

A voice can speak a thousand words and it is within those, that a first impression is made, and my first impression of this man was definitely not good. At all.

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