Jonghyun`s POV

With my promise in mind, days went by. Weeks went by and sometime later years passed all too slowly. I kept living. Somehow, I kept myself alive all this time, but it never felt the same as the times I had the possibility to hold him in my arms. The memories though, they never went away and although they brought me pain, I was grateful I still had them deep in my heart.

People didn`t understand me, watching me with sad and confused eyes. They never stopped as they could see me that day. Literally promising a dead person not to leave them. Who would do something like that? No one, in their eyes I was simply insane and pitiful. I could see it, every emotion their eyes would reflect when seeing me walking out of that cemetery. But I kept my façade that day. No one should see my inner pain. It wasn`t something they should see.

They shouldn`t see that demon, that demon that killed their beautiful angel, now crying bloody tears over his dead kissed body. I wouldn`t give them the pleasure of seeing it, I wouldn`t give him the pleasure to see me like that. He would only laugh in my face if he could. And as much as it hurt to let him go, as much as I missed him, when I let go of his hand and saw his coffin being dropped into the ground, I was still standing there. Keeping my feeling locked away from the public eye.

There wasn`t something I could do and that somehow made me angry. Angry about God and angry about myself. I should have found him earlier. Maybe… just maybe, we would have some more time that day. My family didn`t understand me. Saying I just should let go and move on. But I couldn`t, I promised and I