Chapter 33

“Where the heck is that Rabbit?!” Donghae looked impatiently at his wrist watch and phone simultaneously while waiting for Dara.

“It’s 11pm and she’s still out. Didn’t she know we’ll have to go back to Seoul tomorrow. It’s already late! Haist! She doesn’t even know how to text back!” Donghae muttered to himself while pacing back and forth in his room. He went to the kitchen pretending to get some water. He repeatedly stole glances at the door hoping Dara would arrive anytime soon. 

Bom and Top were sitting at the couch couldn’t help but notice Donghae's worried expression. They looked at each other while glancing at him.

“Did Dara text you?” Top asked Bom. 

“Nope. She hasn’t yet.” Bom said in reply.

“That fish is getting paranoid, can’t you see?” Top commented.

“I’m not blind. I can see that.” Bom said with a sigh while looking at her phone.

Siwon was yawning while walking towards the kitchen to get a glass of water. He scanned around the house with his eyes and glanced on the entrance door while chugging the glass of water. “Looks like Dara is not here yet. Hmm... Do you have that Jaejoong phone number?” Siwon asked Donghae awkwardly.

“Why would I have his number?” Donghae said with annoyance. “Why don’t you ask Bom?” He added

“I don’t have his number. Why don’t you guys ask Yoona. They were all classmate before, right?” Bom said in reply when she heard her name while she passed to them to get some popcorn in the kitchen. 

She couldn’t help but find it amusing as he observed the two brothers worrying over the same girl.

Siwon and Donghae looked at each other awkwardly. 

“If you’re worried that much Hyung, why don’t you ask Yoona?” Siwon asked Donghae with a smirk.

“Do you want to die tonight? Besides who said I’m worried?! Why don’t you ask Yoona instead?! Aren’t you Dara’s friend?! Did you try to call her?” Donghae retaliated 

“I wouldn’t ask you to do that if she called me.” Siwon said rolling his eyes with a sigh. He just bit his lower lip as he couldn’t even talk to Yoona at all. He texted and call Dara several times but she hasn’t called back or replied to him yet and knowing she was with Jaejoong made him more worried.

Donghae let out a deep sigh and went upstairs to Yoona’s room as the last resort. He texted Dara and told her he would like to get an explanation as soon as she came back as to why she wouldn’t at least text them back as she made them worried. “I will definitely punish that rabbit later.” Donghae said shaking his head with his irritated expression.

“Knock! Knock!” Donghae knocked on the door.

“Who is it? Come in!” Yoona shouted over the door.

Donghae went inside and saw Yoona with her clothes and belongings cluttered around as she packing up her clothes into her luggage. 

“Oh Hon, are you finish packing up? It’s so sad we have to go back to Seoul tomorrow. I wish we could stay here longer.” Yoona said while folding her clothes. “I’ll definitely miss mom and dad.” She added pouting.

“I know. It’s time to go back. Don’t worry we’ll come back here soon. Your parents will come to Seoul next week, right? Don’t be sad.” Donghae said smiling at her. 

“Yeah, I know. Let’s go back here again for our honeymoon. I can’t wait.” Yoona said smiling back. 

“Yes, hon. Um.. Hon, can I borrow your phone? I just want to transfer our pictures into my phone.” Donghae said nervously.

“Okay. Here. The passcode is your birthday.” Yoona said smiling to him while handing her phone. Donghae unlocked her phone and went directly to her contacts. He looked for Jaejoong number but he couldn’t find him.

“By the way, is Dara back?” Yoona asked

“I don’t think so.” Donghae replied 

“Really? What time is it? Past 11pm? They really spent time well catching up.” Yoona said smiling while arranging her cosmetics to her bag.

“Are they...that close?” Donghae asked uncomfortably.

Yoona looked at him nodding her head. “They were close during our high school days. They usually hangout under that tree in front of the gymnasium where we saw them together. I think if only Dara didn’t have her Fishboy during our high school days, they would have been a couple. Honestly, I don’t really know anything about her love life. Dara has been secretive when it comes to her Fishboy. I wonder if they are still in contact with each other.” Yoona said in her curious voice.

“Oh. I see.” Donghae said with his disappointed expression.

“I’m back!” Dara shouted echoing to the whole house.

“Oh, she’s here! Speaking of her.” Yoona said. I’m definitely curious what happened to them. I’m excited for her story.” Yoona added smirking.

“Yeah? Okay. I’m done, Thanks hon.” Donghae said handing back her phone.

“Good night. I’ll see you tomorrow. Don’t sleep too late, okay?” Donghae said to Yoona before he gave her a good night kiss. Dara suddenly opened the door of the room and saw them kissing. 

“Sorry! I should’ve knocked.” Dara said and was about to step outside but Yoona stopped her. “No, Dara. It’s our room! No worries! Donghae is just giving me a good night kiss. Good night hon. I’ll see you tomorrow.” Yoona said giving him flying kisses.

Donghae waved awkwardly to Yoona while stealing glances at Dara who was avoiding to look at him. He let out a sigh and whacked his head as soon as he closed the door.

“Such a great timing.” Donghae said to himself while shaking his head.

~~

“So what happened to you and Jaejoong? I’m waiting.” Yoona asked with her eye brows up and down. She paused what she’s doing while staring at her.

“Huh? What do you mean? Nothing really. We just talked.” Dara said in reply. 

“Just talked until midnight? Yeah right. Any old flames coming right back?” Yoona said teasing

“No, were just friends.” Dara said shaking her head while pulling out her luggage in the closet.

“You’re always saying that. Why are you so secretive when it comes to your love life? It’s so unfair! I always tell you mine. All my secrets! Okay fine. So Jaejoong is just a friend and you guys “just talked” that long until I don’t know... midnight? Is it because you are still in love with your Fishboy?” Yoona asked curiously 

“No! Na-not at all. We’re just friends.” Dara said smiling awkwardly.

“Seriously?! Then how about Minho?” Yoona asked again

“Just friends.” Dara repeated with a sigh

“And Siwon?” Yoona asked with curiosity in  

her voice. 

“Just a friend." Dara replied. “I don’t have time for that, Yoona. I promised myself to finish my masters first. Maybe I’ll consider thinking about that after I fulfill that goal. I promise I will tell you everything when that time come.” Dara said in a low voice. 

“Hmm... Yoona, do you remember when we’re doing our biology project before? When we were dissecting frog?”

“Yeah. I will never forget that. Eww. Just by hearing frog, I already feel the goosebumps all over my skin.”

“Not that...Do you remember when you told me that nothing would ever destroy our friendship, especially... when it comes to boys?” Dara asked awkwardly 

“Yeah. Of course! Why did you ask?” 

“About what happened earlier in the reunion...”

“What happened earlier? Oh! You mean that when you and Donghae almost kissed? Yeah...I somewhat got jealous honestly. 

But it’s okay... I know it’s an accident. Come on, Dara. Don’t worry about that! Like what I told you before, I wouldn’t trade our friendship over those petty stuff and besides, I trust you.” Yoona said smiling.

Dara smiled back at Yoona before she looked down pretending to arrange her belongings. The pang of guilt made her heart beat painfully in her chest.

~Flashback~

DARA’s POV

I was in the cubicle of the washroom staring at one hundred dollars gift card in my hand. 

I couldn’t help not to laugh at my stupid self while thinking about what happened during the musical chair. 

“I’m really stupid. Did I really have to do that for a hundred dollar gift card?!” I scolded myself while hitting my head with the gift card. 

I remembered Yoona’s face when she saw me and Donghae almost kissed when he caught me in the mid-air. He should’ve not done that especially in front of our classmates and Yoona! He could’ve just let me fall. That is so embarrassing!

My flow of thoughts suddenly disrupted when I heard Bom’s voice.

“Dara, are you okay?” Bom asked over the door

“Yes, I’m okay, Bom.” I said in reply. I took a deep breath before I opened the door. I smiled at her before I went to the faucet to wash my hands.

Bom was staring at me through the mirror with her wicked smile. I pretended I was unbothered.

“I took a video of you guys while playing that musical chair. Do you want to see it?” Bom asked with a smirk. “I can’t stop laughing at Yoona’s reaction when you and Donghae almost kissed.” She said teasing.

I looked at her immediately with my anxious and worried expression. “Why are you doing this to me, Bommie?” I pouted

“You did great actually. Just be yourself.” Bom added with a wink. “That Jaejoong guy is looking for you outside. I think he has a crush on you.” She added teasing me more.

“I can’t with you. Let me see the video!” I demanded with my anxious expression.

I watched the video and replayed it several times. Yoona’s face was obviously shocked and jealous while looking at Donghae with his arms wrapped around me and our faces almost inches away from each other. 

I don’t think I can look straight at Yoona anymore!

~After the Reunion~

“Batch 2008 Section B. Thank you all for coming. Remember, this is not a good bye until we meet again! 

Oh yeah! Soon! In Donghae and Yoona’s wedding!” Sunny said over the microphone. The mini reunion ended and our old classmates and us bid good bye to each other.

“Ladies, guys! Please don’t forget to attend my wedding! I’m not gonna talk to anyone of you if anyone missed it.” Yoona said to our old classmates.

“Of course! We will be there.” Taeyon and the rest of the girls said in sync and we all hugged each other. 

We all went to the parking lot and waited for them to all leave.

“So...Let’s head back to the Airbnb and prepare our stuff for tomorrow’s flight?” Donghae asked the group 

“This is so sad. Are we really going back tomorrow? I feel like I don’t want to go back to Seoul anymore.” Yoona said pouting 

“Yeah... I can’t believe it already been a week. It’s time to go back home tomorrow.” Bom said with a sad expression 

Siwon, Top, and I agreed with them. We all looked at each other with our sad faces. I was about to go inside the car when someone poked me behind. I looked behind me and saw Jaejoong smiling. He asked me if I want to hang out a little bit. 

“I heard you guys are going back to Seoul tomorrow. Do you want to hang out a little longer, Dara? I would like to catch up with you more before you go.” He said with a shy smile

“Umm.. yeah sure.” I said yes so I could escaped reality for the meantime.

 Seeing how Yoona and Donghae looked so grateful as they thanked my old classmates with their warm wishes made me imagine them on the day of their wedding. I am the maid of honor who would be walking down the aisle before her. I would be looking at him in his wedding suit imagining what would’ve been the scenario if it’s me walking as the bride. I couldn’t imagine how would I feel when that day come just by thinking of it. My heart just couldn’t stop crying in pain.

“I’ll see you guys later!” I told them still avoiding Donghae’s gaze. We waited for them to leave before we start walking.

“Congrats winning that one hundred dollar gift card.” Jaejoong told me as we walked around the school.

“Thank you. Do you want to eat something? My treat.” I asked him avoiding his playful gaze.

“It’s okay. I have a better idea. My mom is a good cook. Do you want to come over to my house? I want to introduce you with someone as well.” Jaejoong said with a smile.

We walked to his house which he said was just close to the school. He apologized beforehand as he said his house was messy. As soon as he opened the door a cute little girl came to him and hugged him.

“This is my daughter, Sana. Say hi to Dara, Sana. She’s daddy’s friend.” Jaejoong said introducing his cute daughter to me.

“Hi, Sana. You’re so cute. My name is Dara. Nice to meet you.” I greeted her kid but she seemed shy as she hid immediately on Jaejoong’s back.

“Don’t be shy, Sana. She’s daddy’s friend. Sorry about that. She’s always shy at first. Say hi. Come on Sana.” Jaejoong said her daughter’s hair gently. 

“No, worries... it’s okay. She’s so cute.”

“Hi.” She said in her tiny voice still hiding behind Jaejoong.

“Omg... hello, cutie Sana. How old are you?” I asked while bending down trying to look at her while she hid behind him.

“Say three. I’m three year old. She just turned three last month.” Jaejoong said coaching Sana. “Hold on a second, Mom! I have a visitor! Can you prepare us food?” Jaejoong called out to her mom who was in the kitchen. Jaejoong carried her daughter and lead us to the kitchen. “Let’s go to the kitchen. Sorry the house is messy. Sana loves to play all over with her toys.”

“Hi, Dara... I’m Jaejoong’s mom. Sit and feel at home. This is almost done.” Jaejoong mom said smiling from the kitchen. I greeted her mom and I offered to help her with cooking and preparing meals but she kindly declined. She told us to sit and feel at home. 

Jaejoong pulled the chair and let me sit down in the dining room area. He sat next to me with Sana. I looked at Jaejoong who was playing with her daughter. My heart melted as I watched them. I couldn’t help but to see Donghae in him imagining what it could’ve been if we had kids.

“Where is her mom? Is she at work?” I asked him curiously. He smiled at me sadly before he said, “She’s not here anymore. She passed away three years ago while giving birth to her.” 

“Oh...I’m sorry to hear that.” I said biting my lower lip.

“It’s okay. Sana is a strong girl. She has her grandmother and her daddy that love her the most.” Jaejoong said with a smile.

“Of course. Sana is lucky to have you and your mom. You really have been through a lot.” I said with a sad smile 

“Yes, I have and I know you too. You must be going through a lot of stuff right now.” Jaejoong said with a smile as he stared at me. “So how’s your Fishboy? Did he figure out that I was the one who commented on your cyworld on that Valentine’s Day?” He said with his smile turning more into a smirk.

“Tsk! Seriously? You must be a fan of him.” I 

I said smiling back. “Since you’re a smarty pants. Why didn’t you become a detective instead?” I said teasing. 

“I can’t be a detective... not unless I’m interested to that person.” He said with a half smile

“What does it mean? Tsk, so you’re really interested in him?” I with a chuckle. My expression suddenly turned serious. “Okay, since you brought it up. Can I...ask you a question? I mean a stupid question.” I asked with a half smile I couldn't control the tears filling up my eyes all of a sudden.

“You always asked me a stupid question.” He said teasing. “Even though I said no, I always try to answer it back.” he said inwardly. “Anything for you." He added with a smile 

“If....you were her, would you rather know the truth even though it would ruin our friendship?” I asked him uncomfortably.

“Okay, hmmm... let me put it this way. If I would ask you, do you think it’s better to get hurt by the truth than to be comforted with a lie? Would you rather hear a lie to spare your feelings or hear the truth and hurt emotionally all at once? Maybe one day...time will come and heal all the pain.” Jaejoong asked me back in reply. He looked at Sana with a smile. “Tell Dara, FIGHTING! Sana.” 

“Fighting!” He added imitating Sana’s small voice while putting Sana’s small fist up in the air.

“You’re the only one who can answer that question, Dara. All I can say is just follow your heart. Sometimes, it’s not all about the brain.” Jaejoong said with a wink.

End of flashback 

~~

Author’s POV

Dara and Yoona were talking and reminiscing the past and their plans for their future while packing up their luggages. Dara’s feeling of guilt slowly eating her alive while listening to Yoona’s excitement for her upcoming wedding. She couldn’t even look at Yoona’s eyes while she’s talking.

“This feels so unreal. I can’t believe I’m really getting married, Dara. Few more weeks.” Yoona said to Dara excitedly.

Dara gave her a smile and just keep herself busy folding her clothes.

“Whenever I think of that day, my heart beat so fast. I’m just so excited but scared at the same time. Everyone that is important to me will be there. Thank you, Dara, for keeping your promise. I’m so happy you’re here with me and you’re my maid of honor.” Yoona said to her with teary eyes.

“Of course. I’m happy for you, Yoona. Why are scared?” Dara asked. 

“I don’t know. Maybe I’m just nervous because I just want everything to be perfect on that day. I know it won’t be that “perfect” as I imagine but I just want Donghae to be happy most especially on that day so he won’t regret choosing me.” Yoona said quoting the word perfect with her both hands. 

“I’m sure it would be beautiful like what you always dream of.” Dara said with a small smile

“To tell you the truth, I’m scared Donghae might change his mind. I’m scared one day he would just realize it’s not me who he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. I always get a nightmare every night about his ex fiancé. What if she came back and stopped our wedding? What if he chose her over me? I don’t know, Dara. I tried not to over think about it but lately I felt like he’s starting to act differently. Maybe I’m just paranoid. Do you think I should look for her to get some closure?” She said with a deep sigh

“Huh? Get some closure? For what?” Dara repeated. “Do..do you know anything about her?”

“That’s the thing, I don’t know anything about her. I promised myself before I wouldn’t dig into his past. I just wanted to create new memories with him so he wouldn’t think of his past anymore. But each day nearing my wedding I felt like there something missing if I don’t get any closure from her.” 

Dara swallowed hard. “I...don’t think it’s necessary to look for her. I mean you’re already getting married. Closure is just for ex-lovers, you know..” Dara said before she took a deep breath to get rid of the heaviness in her chest. “But if ever you talk to her, What would you say to her anyway? Ha ha.. I mean you can practice on me if you want.” Dara added awkwardly.

“I don’t know what to say to her. Okay, let me try.” Yoona said taking a deep breath before she looked at Dara with her fiery eyes. “You left him already, right? Then why are you here? Why do you have to come back?! Just let him be happy and leave.” Yoona said with a tear escaped from her eye. “Ughhh! I’m so dramatic. I don’t think I will talk to her anyway.” Yoona groaned wiping her tear away.

Dara gulped down and tried hard to stop the tears that was about to fall from her eyes. She patted Yoona’s back to console her and told her she would get her some water to cool her down. She couldn’t erase what Yoona told her especially when she said she trust her. She felt so guilty and it’s killing her deep inside.

“Yah! Darabbit! Why are you ignoring my call and text?! You know how worried I was?!” Donghae said to Dara as soon as he saw him alone in the kitchen.

Dara got startled as her mind was preoccupied with Yoona‘s words. “Yah! You scared me!” Dara frowned at him while holding her chest.

“Tsk! Why are you spacing out? Are u thinking of that guy? Who is that Jaejoong guy to you anyway?! And Why did you come back so late?! Where have you guys been? Why you didn’t even text me back?!” Donghae asked with annoyed expression, but he got no response from her.

Dara took a deep breath and just rolled her eyes. She continued to walk passed him towards the fridge. Donghae got more irritated. He held her arm to get her attention. Dara looked at him with her furious expression. “Why are being so childish?!” She asked with her furrowed brow. “Do I have to report everything to you?!” She added while giving him a death glare.

“Chill...I...I just want to know where you went.” Donghae said stuttering. He swallowed hard as he was intimidated with her expression.

Dara took a deep breath before she said, "Let’s just stop this. I don’t think I can do this anymore. If you can eat and sleep peacefully while we’re doing this to your fiancé. Well I can’t. She’s my best friend and I can’t even bear looking at her anymore knowing we’re lying behind her back. It’s so hard...it’s killing me inside. Let’s stop this. I can't...Please! Just...stay away from me.” Dara said with obvious pain in her voice. Tears started falling from her eyes. 

Donghae was taken aback by her reaction. Donghae let go of her arm gently and swallowed hard while staring into her eyes.  

“Why are you being like this all of a sudden?” He asked with his worried expression.

“I’m planning to tell Yoona everything before your wedding. I don’t want to lie to her anymore. I don’t think she will forgive me but at least I could make everything right from now on.” Dara said in her low voice. She felt so drained and her heart was in too much pain. “Let’s forget everything that happened here. Let’s stop this deal. Let’s just treat this as a dream and don’t ever talk to me anymore.” Dara said and was about to go when Donghae wrapped his arm around her pulling her closer in an effort to comfort the both of them. 

“Let me go! What are you doing?! Someone might see us.” Dara cried trying to brush him off but Donghae hugged her even tighter.

“Don’t do this to me, please? Not now.” Donghae said begging her. Tears already wanted to break free from his eyes.

Their hearts were both in excruciating pain but they both know they have to let go. She swallowed thickly and shook her head. “I have to do the right thing for all of us, especially for you. Please be happy.” She whispered quietly breaking his heart with those words.

When he finally let go of her, she stood on her tiptoes and pressed her lips to his one last time. The kiss hurt him so bad.

“Good bye.” she said and began to walk

He couldn’t take the unbearable pain upon hearing those words from her, especially the latter part.

"I still love you." Donghae said to Dara unexpectedly, tears finally escaped his eyes. Those words made Dara stopped and paused as she gasped for air. Dara’s tears flowed endlessly and the pain was just too much to bear. She wanted to turn back to him but her feet became heavier. No matter what her heart said it won’t matter as she decided to follow what her mind was dictating her... to do the right thing.

 “Don’t you ever dare say that anymore or I would never forgive you.” Dara said with her croak voice tears still falling from her eyes. She didn't look at him at all and just continued walking away from him breaking his heart the second time into million pieces.