"Morning Tao" A voice sounded behind him, he didn't even have to turn around,  he knew exactly who it was It's a voice he has heard for many years, and the voice he has dreamt about for a long time. 

"Morning Kris" He said and looked at the boy walking beside him 

"Sorry I didn't catch up yesterday" 
"It's okay. Got your text" He said and ended the conversation. Yesterday after he and Johnny had parted ways, he had received a text from Kris telling him he wouldn't catch up. He didn't really mind that Kris wasn't there, he needed some time alone and really, the walk back did just that. Even if he secretly had hoped Kris would've come and walked with him.

"Hey Tao" 
"What?" He looked up at Kris and realized he hadn't heard what he just said, Kris just shook his head "I asked if you wanna hang out after practice today" 
"We have practice?!" Kris burst out in laughter. Ahh that precious laugh, Tao could never get enough of it. The way his eyes become small and his mouth forms a sincere smile. He would never get tired of it. If only he could... "How could you forget Tao?"

"Lost in the weekend I guess" he answered with a shrug "Tao focus! Next year we're graduating!" Kris was all happy over that fact and Tao, well he was too, but he didn't feel like showing it. Graduating High school just meant moving on to college, which was just a countdown for his few years of freedom. Instead, he watched Kris as he smiled, and showed it with his whole body. It gave him happiness, watching him. It's always like that right? Seeing the one you love happy, makes you happy. Well, Tao could relate to that, really relate. But at school, he always tried to hide it. He knew he couldn't hide the longing stares, but he couldn't avoid Kris, that would be stupid. He hopes someday he has the courage to tell him what he does to him, but he doesn't have that courage "You seem lost in thought Tao" Kris said looking at him. 
"It's nothing, don't worry" Tao gave him reassuring smile, as they entered the school and started chatting about this and that. Tao was happy, to spend time with like this has been a while, but it's like something is missing, besides them not being in a relationship. Relationship! That's it "Hey Kris, where's your girlfriend?" Tao asked wiggling his eyebrows, hoping it wouldn't come off as weird

"Oh her" Kris' eyes wandered around "We broke up" he finally answered, which caught Tao off guard "Oh, you dumped her?" Tao asked, on the outside he looked concerned, but inside he was really happy that she was gone, he wanted to stick her eyes out, with her fake nails! "Yeah, I didn't like her as much as I thought I did" yesssss Kris dumped her! Now we can spend time together. He noticed how Kris kept avoiding his eyes and kept touching his neck. An obvious sign, that he was lying, or at least not telling the whole truth. There's one reason that would make Kris break up with his girlfriend and that is "She hated me right?" Tao asked searching for Kris' eyes. Tao saw Kris' figure, become all pitiful, which he hated, and finally, he stopped up and looked at Tao "Yeah.. sorry" he answered with an apologetic look
"Why are you apologizing? It's not your fault" Kris nodded "I still don't get why that makes you break up with her" He said "Well, you're my best friend, and if they can't accept you, well then I don't want them in my life" Tao couldn't deny that his heart fluttered at that moment, while it also broke. "Well, I'll see you at lunch" Kris spoke and walked away, as they had arrived at Tao's classroom.
"Yeah later" Tao replied and disappeared into his classroom, and sat down "Ready for practice?" Johnny asked Tao "Yeah" 
"Did something good happen? You're all sunshine" 
"Well" Tao started out, looking outside "Kris broke up with his girlfriend"
"So now you have him for yourself?" Johnny raised his eyebrow "Yeah, I haven't hung out with him for a while. I'm so happy, but also scared, what if he knows Johnny?" Tao slumbered down in his seat, it has been on his mind all weekend. What if Kris had heard him and Johnny, and that's why he didn't catch up, and that's why he was so awkward around him this morning? Johnny sat down in his seat in front of Tao, and placed his head on his hand "How would he have found out?"

Tao started drumming his fingers on his table and he kept looking outside, for some reason he wanted to cry, was it because he was scared that Kris is disgusted by him? Afraid that if he knew, soon everyone would know and then his parents would find out, and scandals would come and his fathers business would go down- Geez! Overthinking! Stop! "He... he was really awkward this morning" Tao started "So what if he heard us?" Tao locked eyes with Johnny, whose eyes didn't give the comfort he had hoped for. Instead, they were dark, which made Tao a little bit scared, but in a moment they turned soft and gave Tao a reassuring smile.

"Tao... he doesn't know, and if he did, he would have confronted you about it" Johnny spoke in that soothing voice, but it didn't help. Tao shook his head, the tears fell and didn't stop, and neither of them remembered that they were in a classroom. God Tao hated being in love. He hated that it made him overthink, and live in a surreal world! "N-no... if he knows, he-he'll wait for me to tell him... he's that kind of person... unless it's girls... if it's girls and h-he can see" Tao kept drumming his fingers, but with much more force, and his hands were shaking, even Johnny saw it "I-if it's girls.... and he can see... that they're interested... then he-he'd confront them. S-so... I know I have no chance" Tao, started chuckling over his own foolishness, crying about something he knows he can't get, but still hopes he can. "Tao, maybe you should go home" Tao looked up at Johnny and saw how pained and sad Johnny looked, but there was another emotion present, but Tao didn't know which "W-why?" He asked 
"You can't make it through the day like this" He said with scoff and Tao dried his eyes "I can, I've done it before" 
"I know, but really, don't you feel like doing nothing right now?" 
"I guess, yeah. But I'm supposed to hang out with Kris after practice... but I see your point, I won't be able to do well, looking like this" Johnny nodded in agreement. Tao started packing his things and left the classroom.

He managed to slip out of the school somehow. He walked down the street, ignoring whoever might be staring at him, probably throwing curses at him for skipping school. He didn't wanna care, but he did. He couldn't help caring about what people thought of him, especially Kris. Even though they had been friends for so long, he couldn't help but wonder what he'd think if he knew Tao loved him. Would he hate him? Accept him? The tears still fell as he reached his house, and the sobs continued as he opened the door to the gigantic house. 

He fell down on his knees after he entered because he was exhausted, he just gave up, he didn't know what he gave up on, he just did. When did he get so many things bottled up? He didn't know. Did the pain he felt from Kris' relationships finally show? Maybe he was too busy to notice his pain. "I'm so ing weak!" He yelled at himself, as the sobs continued. He hated crying because it showed weakness. He hated love because it made him vulnerable and... sad. He wanted to cry, but there was anger inside him too. A wave of anger, that waited for Tao to finally lose his self-control. Maybe the anger came because the sadness was too overwhelming? He didn't want to lose it though. Anger and violence is never the answer, but he got up, went through the giant foyer, walked up the staircase, and into the giant room that was his bedroom. Once he was inside, he started packing his training bag. He didn't like his room, he felt it was too much; Too big, too cold, too lonely. He gathered his training clothes, a towel, and changed out of his clothes. He always sought to sport or exercise when he was down, that's how it has always been. It was a way for him to tell himself that he wasn't weak, that he wasn't girly, that he was a boy. He grabbed a face mask, slung the bag over his shoulder and walked outside again.

He walked down to the subway station, not feeling like walking all the way there. His legs felt weak as he walked down the sunny street, his face mask covering his mouth, but not stopping the tears from falling. He didn't understand why, but he needed a day off anyway, even if this hadn't happened. 

His father had been talking about how he shouldn't skip school as the future heir of the company, and how he should focus on this and that subject in school, and that college and so on. But really Tao didn't want to, he's so sure,  he doesn't fit as the director of a company. That's not who he is, and when he would ask why his older sister, Victoria couldn't take over, his father told him "She can't. She's a woman. She's not the first born son" Tao told him to marry Victoria off to someone, who could take over the company because he is not the right person. That was the end of the discussion, but his father still pushes "the heir" title onto him. Tao stepped into the subway, and quietly sat down since the rush hour had passed. What should he tell Jinki, when he arrives? What should he do if Kris somehow finds him? Would he have to change hideout? In the midst of everything, he took off his mask and leaned back in his seat. He didn't really care if the people on the subway saw him, he needed to breathe. He looked around in the subway car and saw a guy staring back at him. His eyes watched him, studied him, and Tao couldn't tear his eyes from him either. The guy was young with strong brows, and a sharp jaw. After moments of staring, Tao's stop was announced in the speakers, and he glanced one last time before stepping out. 

He walked down the street and didn't mind the world moving on around him. His legs moved automatically and led him to the door "Welcome- Tao what the hell are you doing here!?" a voice sounded as soon as he had gone inside "Well good morning to you too Jinki" Tao answered and closed the door behind him, and faced the man who stood with a disappointed look "Why are you not in school, have you been crying?" Jinki, went around his desk and changed his expression "yeah, I have" Tao said and tried to hide his eyes, by wiping his hands over repeatedly over his eyes "But I really just wanna train okay?" 

Jinki let out a small sigh "Sure?" he asked, and Tao nodded "yeah, I'll come out later" Tao said with a wave and walked through the hall with many training machines, to a hallway with doors, leading into private rooms that made use for dance or in Tao's situation, martial arts. Tao had his own private room that his father had rented for him since he found Jinki's gym, and really, it was great. He didn't have to face anyone else, and could just focus on his own training. He still had his usual wushu lessons to attend to, which were in another place, this was more to train himself, both for soccer and wushu.

He was happy that Jinki had invested in speakers for every room, so he could play his trusted playlist while he practiced his movements, making sure they were down to perfection. 

He hadn't realized just how long he'd been in there before there was a knock on the door. 

"Hey Tao?" a voice sounded, and the said boy, saw the figure standing at the door, through the mirrors. He turned around and faced Jinki "What's up?" he asked out of breath.

"You've been in here for a good two hours now... are you okay?" Tao averted his gaze "yeah I'm fine" he lied though he really was exhausted, that wasn't the question he answered was it? He went to sit down against the wall and Jinki went over and sat beside Tao.

"So what's going on Tao, you know you can tell us whatever" He implied and it's true. Tao had always come to him when he needed someone to talk with when it couldn't be Kris. That was before he started talking to Johnny. He doesn't remember when he started coming here, or when he started knowing Jinki's friend group, but he's glad he did "Everything I guess, but it's something... something else, that's really bothering me lately" He started out and Jinki nodded "Something I know about?" He questioned, his eyes never leaving Tao, and the glint in Jinki's eyes, comforted Tao a bit "I guess" he replied with hesitation "You have all already suspected it and I'm not the best at hiding it either I guess" Tao added, "So, what is it about?" Jinki put in the conversation and Tao hesitated to answer Jinki's question, even though he knew he wouldn't judge him. Johnny was straight and supported him, so why wouldn't Jinki? He supported Taemin, so why not? "I...I" He began "I've talked with a friend of mine" He blurted out, though that wasn't what he wanted to say "And well, he knew I was different" he ranted on "Different?" Jinki questioned "We-well" he stuttered and turned to look at Jinki, but he felt his heart stop as he looked at the older guy's eyes. 'I can't say it' Tao thought "I..I" he tried again "He.." he muttered, trying to find a way to let it out "I'm just... I... I'm gay, and he found out" He blurted out at last "Okay" Jinki replied

"Okay?" Tao repeated, and Jinki nodded "Yeah. Okay" a smile played on his lips, and Tao couldn't hide the happiness that spread in his stomach. Now he had told 2 people about his secret, and maybe someday more will know. He couldn't help picturing Kris and him, and how Kris accepted him, and maybe even Tao's father knew, and he had nothing against it. Maybe he'd let Tao marry Kris, so they could be together. Before Tao knew, he was crying with a smile on his face, maybe that future isn't so far away? They'll love him and accept, and let him live his life. Jinki's hand landed on Tao's shoulder and gave it a small squeeze together with a small laugh. Tao leaned into Jinki "Thank you" he whispered "Thank you"

So, what do you think about the first 2 chapters? And if anyone is wondering, I'm not going to write aka Tao's dreams etc. Cause I'm pretty awful, some of you probably already know, since the one shot Tao's secret was awful written.. So for now I won't be writing any ecchi scenes. Sorry