I'm back!!~~

Tomorrow is Taeyeon's first solo concert 'Butterfly's Kiss', Can't wait for the fancam's!!

 I don't know why but i think this chapter is boring, but for some reason i'm shipping Taeyeon and T.O.P alot these days! they're so cute!~~~

 What do you think TOPTAE or GTAE??

 Taeyeon's POV 

From that day that we got our acceptance at SM entertainment, we moved into the company’s dorm for the trainees all together Yoona, Sooyoung, Tiffany and me. There were another trainees too that we didn’t met before, but with time we became more closer as real sister and friends that want to get this dream of their life become true before their eyes.

I practiced like a crazy every day, as there’s no tomorrow. It was hard I know, but I didn’t want to give up, no actually I can’t give up! I wanted to show him, to show them, to let them see the new Kim Taeyeon, the real Kim Taeyeon before their eyes and regret not holding onto her.

One day after all this hard and blood-shedding practicing, I wore my hoodie and left the dorm secretly.

The girls found out, but tried to cover on me from the managers.

There’s one place that I always go to when I have a lot in my mind, no one could imagine to find me there, also no one is there too.

I put on my earphones, laid down while eyes fixed on the sky and thought, thought and thought. Then let everything fade away with the wind and return back to my place in this life.

Whenever I had a lot in mind, I would go there. Even though that brought me a lot of troubles and bullies from the managers and the girls, but I never listened and did what I want, since this is my life not theirs.

One day I couldn’t take it anymore, I wanted everything to end. I was tired, I wanted to leave, fly away from all this hell that I was living in. what I hate the most is someone keep on telling me what to do and what not.

That was when I busted in our manager face..

“Ya Kim Taeyeon! Can’t you do it probably?” he shouted at me, when I wasn’t cleaning the floor in the right way.

I rolled my eyes and sighed angrily.

“Huh? Did you just roll your eyes at me?” he got worked up, and came toward me heatedly.  

He raised his hand at me, but got blocked with my grip.

“O-Oh? Are you starting a fight with me?”

“Let’s stop here.” I told him, since I was boiling from inside at what I saw today in the news.

“Oh look at this.. are you taking the role of the boss here? Are you a gangster?”

“O-Oppa, please stop..” Yoona told him.

“Oppa, you’ll regret it..” Sooyoung warned him.

“Regret? I regret the moment that this girl entered this company, you didn’t bring anything other than troubles with you!”

“I warning you..” I told him.

“Warning me? Huh? Let’s see what you have..” he started teasing me with silly moves.

With my sigh, my bag flew up and my hands got their right position to end this silly and frustrated person in front of me.

With my 1-2 upper backspin elbow attack, he was cornered sheepishly.

“U-Umma!” he cried out.

I gave him a high-kick right at his throat.

“Should I stay? Or you will stay?..” I asked him with a poker, scary gaze.

“N-No, I’ll l-leave..” he said while trembling.

I landed my leg back, and kicked the floor strongly.

He was scared with it and ran cowardly.

I sighed and started fixing my hair and clothes.

“Ya! You didn’t have to take it to that level..” Yoona said.

“Why?” told her while tying my hair.

“..You might get expelled like this!” Sooyoung continued.

“..What in that? I’m tired of this life anyways..” I replied half-heartedly.

“Are you alright?” Tiffany approached me, when I sat down.

“I don’t know..” I bowed my head down, “..I just want everything to end fast. I can’t take it anymore.”

She sandwiched me, “Everything gonna be alright, as you have the faith and believe that you’re going to do it, it’s going to really happen.” I looked at her, “As long as you have the will to do it, time will forget about you and flew fast. But as you keep on thinking about it and concern yourself, you’ll get trapped in this time-maze.” She said it all in english.

“Wooah~ you got wiser Mrs. Hwang.”  I messed her hair playfully.

“I learned it from Choi aunt.” She was proud while saying it.

“Aigoo our aunt..” I got reminded with her, “..I missed her so much.”

“Me too.”

“Should we visit her?”

“How? They won’t allow us.”

“Ya it’s our life, not theirs!”

“Taeyeon but this is the rules..”

“..There’s no rules when it come to our personal lives.”

“What’re you planning on?”

“Tomorrow let’s meet at the entrance gate at our dorm building 9 o’clock.”

“Okay.”

And that time really came by, still no one talked to me about the incident back then with that annoying manager.

“Oh you really came..” I told the pinkish approaching girl.

“..How are we going to go now?”

“Wait.. oh he came!”

“Who?-” as she asked, he unloaded from the car.

“Tabi!” I ran at him.

“Taengoo~” he hugged me back, “What’s wrong? Why did you called me at this hour?”

“I missed you~” I pouted cutely.

“You want me to believe that?” he sarcastically replied.

“Why not?” I got angry.

“Kim Taeyeon missed me? You must be dreaming!”

“Ahh~ Why?” I whined.

“If you heard ‘Choi Seunghyun missed Kim Taeyeon’ it’s believable, but what I just heard doesn’t make any sense at all.”

“Ya!” I hit him playfully.

“Annyeonghaseyo..” he noticed Fany.

“Ya when will you break this awkwardness between the two of you?”

“When you shut up and ride the car now..” he pushed me inside.

By that we went with our way out of this prison secretly.

“Omo Taeyeon-ah! Fany!” my aunt was surprised with our visit.

“What brought you here? Shouldn’t you be at your dorm right now?”

“We escaped.”

“What?”

“Ya you little thing! Why didn’t you tell me that?” Seunghyun hit my head.

“If I did, you wouldn’t brought me here.”

“Aigoo~” he messed my hair, “Aren’t you going to get into trouble like this?”

“This is nothing, she knocked down our manager last night-” Fany slipped with her words.

“Ya!” I hit her.

“Sorry..”

“You did what?”

“Ya do you think it’s a school over there? Do you still use your fist on men?” aunt now was the one to scold me.

“Tell me why did you do it?” now uncle asked calmly.

We sat down and I told them together with Fany the whole thing he did for us through these days. From yelling, mistreating and when that time where he ually harassed couple of our trainees mate, sometimes he would hit us when we get mistakes in practicing as a humor but it wasn’t like that at all, and it was hitting with strength and some had burse from him, and also when he lied to the vice-president in front of our eyes that he did gave us everything we should get from this company from supplies and stuff where he didn’t and took them to his house.

“This son of bi*ch!” my aunt for the first time cursed.

“Let’s go!” Seunghyun oppa held me by my wrist.

“Where?” I was startled.

“I’m going to show that punk! Why didn’t you tell me before?” he was shouting and in angry tone.

“Ya why are you all worked up?” I said sarcastically.

“Don’t you know that you have me? Why were you living up with all what he did for you and kept silent all this time?” he started shouting again, but this time I could see sincere worrying and emotions pouring up in his voice.

“I was afraid that you might react like this, that’s why.”

“I should react like that, how could I stay still when that rascal is roaming around you and mistreating you in all ways? Let’s go!..” he gripped his fist, and started walking toward the door while boiling from anger.

I ran and stopped him by a back-hug, “Aigoo~ I’m more worried about you Tabi.” He stood still, “I don’t want you to dirt your hands with him, I already hit him up. Now the company will deal with him don’t worry.”

“But still-”

“There’s no but in here!” as my mouth said that, I got reminded with the time with Jiyong and how he and my father said that before. And also remembered why I was that stressed all these days.

He held onto my hands, and turned to be facing me.

“Kim Taeyeon, you’ll stay here till that punk leave that company.” He told me seriously, “No wait! Come to our company, I will talk with our president. I heard you got scouted by him before-”

“Oppa..” I called, cutting his words. “..I won’t go to your company.”

“Why? It’s better than yours..”

“Just I don’t want.”

“You hate me that much?” he childishly pouted while asking.

“Aigoo~ why would I hate this little cute boy?”

“Here we go, they started their drama once again..” his sister Hyeyoon sighed and sipped from her tea.

Fany was talking with my aunt, my uncle was reading his newspaper as always while having his late cup of coffee and Hyeyoon unnie was talking with her boyfriend at the phone alone, whereas me and Tabi oppa were urging like little kids as we always did.

I think I can feel my only happiness in this life is when I’m around these people, my most beloved people in this life.

The warm and dark ray of the sun welcomed our eyes, I turned at my other side to find Fany just opening her eyes too.

“Morning~”

“Morning~ what time is it?”

She looked at the clock, to cry out.. “Oh my God! It’s 4:28 afternoon!”

“What?!” I jumped from my bed.

“Good morning girls- no it’s good afternoon I think..” Aunt face welcomed us downstairs.

“Why didn’t you woke us aunt? We could helped you with breakfast..”

“You were sleeping like corpse, would I woke you after witnessing this heartbreaking scene?” 

We messed our hair in embarrassment.

“They didn’t let you sleep enough right?..” he hugged us and sadly asked.

“I never remember that I had a tight sleep like this before going out from here!” Fany shared.

“Aigoo my kids~” she hugged us tightly and pitted the way we lived all along these months alone there in the cold and shabby dorm.

Days went by, and we stayed at our aunt place without hearing anything about that incident yet.

I got call from Yoona saying that most of the trainees escaped out from the dorm after our departure days ago, as well as Yoona and Sooyoung did.

As I stayed at aunt’s house, I continued on with my studies since I had the final exam the next week.

“Eat this it will give some energy..” aunt entered my room.

“Thank you aunt, I don’t have anyone other than you~” I kissed her cheeks passionately.

“Taeyeon-ah, there’s something I don’t understand about you..”

“What?” I asked with a muffled voice from all the cake that entered my mouth moments ago.

“..if you dream was about singing, then why are you continuing your studies to become a doctor? Will you become a doctor or a singer? I can’t understand it no matter what how many times I thought about it!”

“Hmm.. I want to become a singer since I love to sing not for anything else. And in the same time I want to become a doctor like my father. That only what I see in my eyes is justice and humanity. But still I’m concerning about what to become and what to hide.”

“At the moment, what do feel like doing the most? What do you want to show people that ‘I’m this kind of person!’?” she asked me.

I thought about it, and got the reason why I started all this.

“I think I want to show them that I’m a singer..”

“Then follow your heart little girl~” she took me to her arms, “No one would help you and guide you in this life other than your heart. Just before doing anything in this life, ask your heart first..”

I wrapped my arms around her tightly and told her sincerely, “Thank you auntie, I don’t know what I would’ve did without you in my life.” tears were just at the corner of my eyes.  

“That’s goes the same for me~” she caressed my hair warmly, “Should we have Chi-maek* for dinner?”  (Chi-maek means Chicken and Maekju that’s well-known as bear in Korean slang)

“Assa!!” I went up jumping around happily.

By that days flew by and all what I did is studying at the morning and having fun with my aunt and cousin at the noon, after that have my relaxing and classy time with my beloved uncle, then at the late night play with my child Seunghyun-ah till he fall asleep from tiredness from working all day with his busy schedule as a member of BIGBANG boy group.

While Fany went out with Sooyoung and Yoona couple of times for shopping, helped my aunt with changing her wardrobe style into a more modern and stylish look that suit the era she was living at. Since she didn’t complete her studies she was much free person than me. So she would always bring me some snacks and drinks to cheer me up while studying that hardest major in this life.

My flight was the next