TWENTY-TWO

Night was falling. The whole group and their manager had ordered pizza secretly and watched a movie through dinner, laughing and talking,, forgetting about their diets and worries. Reluctant to join them, Kyungsoo and Minseok pretended to be asleep, and Luhan claimed he still felt too ill to join them and would rest. Eventually, Minseok had fallen into slumber, but Kyungsoo still lay awake on his bed, with Luhan next to him.

In his anger, he’d pushed his and Jongin’s beds apart, claiming, “he doesn’t need me, he may as well sleep with Sehun,” with spite. Sheets crumpled and messy, he curled up and cried himself out, until he was completely silent and somewhat relaxed.

Luhan lay beside him with his eyes shut; hoping just being together was enough comfort for him.

The sounds of Sehun and Jongin laughing were difficult to block out.

Eventually the manager left, claiming he’d return soon with a ‘surprise’ for them all, but only if they promised to keep it a secret.

Jongin had quietly crept into the room to wake Kyungsoo up for it, hoping it would cheer his dampened spirits, but once he saw the dishevelled sheets, the joined beds torn apart, and Kyungsoo curled up against Luhan; he stepped back, hurt.

How many times was he going to see his boyfriend sleeping with the other members? Sure, he was playing around with Sehun all day, but he didn’t think Kyungsoo would end up next to Luhan again.

“I promise I won’t ever choose anyone over you. I won’t hurt you like that ever again.”

Trying and failing to brush off the panging in his chest, he walked out of the room again, closing the door quietly behind him.

“Are they awake?” Junmyeon asked, when Jongin walked back into the living room. Everyone was sprawled out, stuffed from their filling dinner, and making mindless, comfortable talk with one another. Baekhyun had his head in Chanyeol’s lap, eyes closed, and Jongin felt his heart sink at the sight of it.

He shook his head.

“Luhan’s asleep with Kyungsoo. Again. He pulled our beds a-apart.”

Jongin’s voice broke at the thought, and Junmyeon gasped, pulling the younger into his arms. He stood on his toes so Jongin could comfortably rest his head on his shoulder.

“Oh, Jongin…”

Clinging to the elder, Jongin started crying into his neck, and slowly, all the members began to notice.

“Jongin, what’s the matter?” Yixing asked, swinging his legs off the couch and standing up. Sehun scrambled to his feet and ran over, putting his hands on Jongin’s shoulders.

“What happened?”

Junmyeon frowned. “Kyungsoo.”

“What now?”

“Nothing,” Jongin sobbed, “it-it’s nothing.”

“It’s clearly something,” Sehun said angrily. “If he made you cry, I’m going to punch him into next week.”

“He’s sleeping next to Luhan again,” Junmyeon explained, patting Jongin’s back.

Sehun scoffed. “I’ll punch him into next month, instead.”

“Please don’t,” Jongin whispered, breaking away from Junmyeon and turning to him. “Please, it’s not his fault.”

Sehun crossed his arms, and Jongin looked at him with pleading eyes.

“Fine. Whatever. I’ll wake them up instead.”

“Don’t touch Kyungsoo.”

Sehun rolled his eyes, “I won’t.”

Minseok flopped onto the couch with lazy eyes and messy hair, still half-asleep from his nap. Jongdae was talking to him, but he could hardly open his eyes, let alone reply.

“Did you sleep well?” Jongin asked kindly, hiding the fact that he had been crying his eyes out minutes ago, and reaching for Kyungsoo’s waist. Kyungsoo nodded slowly, and Jongin kissed his lips softly.

“Today was really boring without you,” he whispered, “I wanted to swim with you.”

You didn’t seem bored with Sehun, Kyungsoo thought bitterly.

“Sorry.”

Jongin stepped back. “Are you angry at me?”

Kyungsoo smiled up at him half-heartedly. “Of course not.”

It was good enough for Jongin. He smiled in relief and kissed Kyungsoo again, letting his lips linger this time, ignoring Sehun’s discriminating comments.

“Take your gay to another room.”

Kyungsoo broke away from the kiss and glared at him, “says the one who was forcing my boyfriend into a in the van.”

Sehun flushed, “I-I wasn’t—I didn’t—!”

“Be quiet, Sehun,” Jongin breathed, hands trailing up to reach for Kyungsoo’s face and deepening the kiss. Frustrated, Sehun elbowed them out of the room and slammed the door behind them.

Thankfully, the door closed right then, for the doorbell rung at that exact moment, and everyone froze.

With a swing, the door Jongin and Kyungsoo were locked behind opened. Jongin stood, dumbfounded, with the elder looking over his shoulder.

“Is it our surprise?” Zitao gasped, running for the door.

“Wait!” Jongin cried. He turned around quickly and reached to tidy Kyungsoo’s hair, brushing it out of his face with gentle fingers. He leaned down to kiss him once more, before spinning around again.

“Okay. I’m ready.”

Zitao rolled his eyes and opened the front door, expecting to find the manager – but, to his surprise, nobody was there.

“Hello?”

Suddenly, Chanyeol gasped. “Look!”

Pushing Zitao away, he bent down to collect the white box on the floor, mouth agape. He turned around and kicked the door shut behind him, and the other member’s mouths dropped open when they saw what it was.

“Is that…cake?” Baekhyun whispered.

Chanyeol dropped the box on the table, heart beating, and opened it slowly, gasping when the beautifully decorated dessert was revealed, the words ‘You Deserve It’ inscribed in delicate, pale icing.

“It’s cake!” Sehun shrieked, “it’s really cake!”

Junmyeon clapped his hands to his head, “I can’t believe it! We haven’t been able to eat cake in years!”

Baekhyun dove for the table, “I want some! Give me some!”

“No way!” Sehun snapped, “me first!”

“Stop, stop!” Yixing cried, “everyone wait! I’ll cut you all a slice, calm down! Baekhyun, get your fingers out of the cake!”

He elbowed everyone out of the way and covered the dessert with his arms, glaring at Baekhyun.

“Junmyeon, get me a knife.”

“Why?” Junmyeon cried, horrified.

“So I can cut the cake?”

He blushed. “Oh. Yeah.”

Junmyeon rushed into the kitchen and Yixing rolled his eyes. “Someone want to help me divide this into twelve pieces?”

“Eleven.”

The members fell quiet.

Everyone turned to Kyungsoo. He was leaning against the wall, expressionless. “I don’t want any. Eleven pieces.”

Luhan gulped. “Uh—ten. I’ll pass.”

“Same,” Minseok said softy, “nine pieces.”

They all felt small under everyone else’s horrified stares – especially Minseok. Jongdae was practically right against him, mouth open so wide he could catch a baseball.

“Why?” Jongin said weakly. Kyungsoo met his eyes boldly.

“Not hungry.”

“You haven’t eaten all day,” Yifan snapped, “you can’t not be hungry.”

Kyungsoo turned up his nose at Yifan. “Is there a problem? We’re meant to be losing weight, anyway.”

“You’re skinny enough!” Yifan roared. Luhan flinched, and Kyungsoo’s lips trembled.

I’m not. Of course I’m not skinny enough. I’ll never be skinny enough.

“What are you going to do about it?” Kyungsoo cried, “tell management? Who’s the one in the wrong here, eating cake when we’re on a diet?”

“Is that really all that you think about now?” Yifan shouted, “your diet? Is that all that matters to you?”

“Maybe it is!”

Yixing grabbed Yifan’s arm. “Stop, Yifan. It’s not that big of a deal.”

Yifan shook him away.

“Food is controlling you, Kyungsoo!” he continued, voice straining from yelling so loud. “Can’t you see what it’s doing to you? You’re going to die!”

“Big deal!” Kyungsoo screamed, “big ing deal, if I die! I’d be better off dead, anyway!”

Jongin fell to his knees at that, and Kyungsoo pushed past him, running out of the room. Even Luhan and Minseok were too horrified to react. Jongin burst into tears, leaning forward on his palms and screaming tearfully at the carpet. Shakily, Sehun bent down to help him, but was too weak to even touch him.

Junmyeon dropped the knife he was midway through bringing to Yixing, and it skidded along the floor, breaking the horrible tension in the room.

“No!” Jongin screamed, “no, no, no!”

Teary-eyed, Luhan kneeled down on one leg and touched Jongin’s cheek, shaking his head.

“Jongin…it-it’s okay…”

“He doesn’t even care if he dies!” Jongin wailed, “he doesn’t even care!”

He looked up. “He wants to die, and you think this is all okay?”

Luhan put a hand to his eyes and started to cry, head down.

“No,” he said quietly, “no, it’s not okay.”

He stood up, palm covering his face, and stepped back. He hit the wall with a bang, and weakened against it, crying harder.

It’s not okay. Nothing’s ever going to be okay again.

✏ [ a/n ] YES YES I KNOW IT'S BEEN LIKE 40 YEARS AND ALL I'M GIVING YOU IS THIS CRAPPY 1500 WORD CHAPTER I KNOW i'm sorry guys thank you all for your support, for not unsubscribing and for still leaving comments for me to read when i got back from my break <3 rather fortunately i had a 5-day school camp last week so it was a great break from reality and i used it very well as a recovery period; i'm still all broken up over the whole kris thing but i'm emotionally stable and THAT'S ALL THAT MATTERS YAY!!!!!! i guess the best way to deal with it is to not, really. i just forget that it's happening. don't watch their lives or anything. wait for everything to be confirmed first. i hope you've all been well and you've gotten better over this sad news??? thank you for your constant support, everything, and welcome to my new readers and everyone i love each and every one of you <3 i hope this chapter is enough and i'll try and update more i'm just so lazy right now i'm sorry but thank you for still supporting me despite that lmao also 200+ SUBSCRIBERS HOW HAS THIS BEEN ACHIEVED? you guys are all insane and i love every single one of you okay my neck is killing me gotta reheat this stupid heat pack TIP: GET A DECENT PILLOW i care about you all wouldn't want you to completely deface the muscles in your neck like i have omg seriously this hurts more than kris news. or not. kris issue hurts more. whatever don't think about it guys DISTRACTION this makes me laugh constantly if you're ever down just return to this video lol okay i think i've said enough i love you guys

word count: 1449