I've waited waited for Yongguk infront of the gate. 'I hope, he'll come today', I thought.
10 minutes...20 minutes...
School would beginn in 10 minutes but he wasn't here.
'Aish, where is he?'. It was so cold. But I would wait until he would come.

"Are you waiting for your new oppa?", a unknown guy smiled.
"Just shut up ok?", I shooted back. 
He laughed with his friends, and annoyed me with this freaken word 'oppa'

"Yah! Leave her alone or I'll end you, arasso?", Yongguk glared at them.
They shrugged with their shoulders and left.
I looked to Yongguk, who ignored me and pass me.
"Yongguk, wait please!", I hold his wrist and get in front of his way.
He just looked down on me. No emotion, just a poker face.

"What I wanted to tell you since yesterday was that Daehyun is not my bofriend!", I began.
He didn't answer, he just looked at me. I continued talking to him:
"Listen, yesterday when I was upset I went to the dance studio. I was mad at you. I wanted to dance and to relax. But then I hea.."

"Yah! Katara! Himchan told me that you call a guy oppa. Why don't you call me oppa either?", Jongup said.
He was on the way towards me and Yongguk. 
He leand his arm on my shoulder and chuckled.
"What happen to you? Did you fall on you head or what? I thought you'll never call someone oppa. And now a nice looking guy cames to our school and you forget all your views?" He chuckled again.

Yongguk tourned around and left.
"Omo, why is he leaving?", Jongup asked.
I glared at him.
"Wae?", he asked.
I groaned and left him to. Jongup was like Himchan. Ok, Jongup was sweet and nice, and loves dance like, and Himchan was only a show-off, but they two had thing incommon. Everytime, when I wanted to talk to Yongguk they appeared and made everything worse. I knew, it wasn't their fault, but it annoyed me.

I went to my class just in time. I sit on my chair and didn't worth a look to Daehyun.
But he also ignored me. I didn't knew why, but it disturb me.
He was the one who wanted me to call him 'oppa' but now he's ignoring me? Ok, fine.

Allday long we didn't talk to each other. 
After the lessions I just put my things in back and was about to left when I saw Kairi on our class door.
She looked at me hateful and shove against me.
I didn't say anything and went out of the class room. 

She really hated me, but I didn't cared. I just went outside and saw 3 guys. The same 3 guys who spilt water on me.
I wanted to pass them. But one hold my arm.
"Yah! Let go!", I said and he pushed me back.
"Yah! What do you want?", I said angry.
"I heard from your brother." one of them said.
"W-what?", I asked. I was confiused, who did they know about my brother?
"Your brother.", the leader repeated. 
"Tomorrow is his date of death, isn't it?" the one with black hair asked.
I couldn't answer. I could hardly breath. Everytime when someone reminded me of my brother it hurted so much.
"I heard it was the fault of you and your mum.",the leader said.
"Yes, after your dad went in prison, he had to work for you two, because your mom was in the hospital and you were too young." the one with brown hair said.
"He had to work so hard, that he forgot to eat and drink, and also when he was ill he went to work, but then he got cancer and that was his end."
"Aren't you ashamed?" the leader asked.
I couldn't breath, really, I couldn't.
"You should have parents who take care of you two, but one of them beat you up. The other one was too weak. Your brother did everything for you, but how do you thank him? With nothing! I never saw you going to his grave! You are so shameful!"

I put my hands against my ears and cried.
"Why do you say that to me, you don't me.", I said under my sobs. It hurted so much. My heart beating so hurtful.
They didn't answerd, they just looked down on my, while I was crying.
"How dare you saying that to me. I didn't do you anything! Why? Why?", I fell on my knees. Still holding my hands on my ears and crying.
"Why? My brother is dead! WHY!", I shouted the last word and I crack under the pressure. I couldn't handle it anymore. I was sobbing and crying on the ground. 'My brother he's dead because of me! Me, me, me, me..'

"KATARA!", I heard a dull voice. I was still holding my hands on my ears. I was shaking.
"Yah, what happend?", the same dull voice asked. A strong hand was on my shoulder. I leaned other my knees and I was still shaking.
"KATARA, ANSWER ME!", the voice shouted. I recognized the voice. 
I held my head high. I looked into my lover worried and shocked eyes.
"Yongguk..", I whispered und my tears and sobs.
"Yes! It's me! What happend?"
I couldn't answer, I burst again into tears and sobs.
"Yah, Katara! Tell what happend! YAH, LOOK AT ME!", he shouted.
I tried to stop and I began to whimper. He was absolutly helpless.
"Oppa...", I brought out.
"Huh? What?", he tried to understand me under my whimper.
"Why Yongguk? Why?!", I started crying again. I couldn't breath anymore and I was also coughing,

This was enough for him. He put his hand under my knees and my back. He lifted me up carried me out of the school.
I didn't really noticed a thing. I was only thinking about my brother. 'Youngjae oppa..'

Yongguk sat down and I was on his lap. I cried and cried. He didn't say anything anymore. He just hold me tight and waited.
I calmed down a bit because I went tired. I didn't knew how long I was crying but I think it was really long because when I lifted my head I saw the sunset. I turned my head and looked into Yongguk's face. His face was so near. I felt his breath on my skin.

"Are you alright now?", he whispered.
I nodded. I looked into his eyes. They were full with concern.
He looked back. It wasn't unpleasant at all. It felt so good, to have the one you love by your side.
"Tell me what happend.", he demanded.
I shoke my head. I didn't wanted to speak about it. I would only cry again.
"Please.", he whispered. His voice was so deep and his face was only a few centimetre away from mine.
Again I shoke my head. He sighed and hold me tighter.
"I know, you don't want to talk about it, but only if tell me what happened I could help you."
I knew that I would regret it, but his voice was so said, that it hurt me too. I cleared my throat and tried to speak as normal as I could.

"I was on the way home. Then I saw the 3 guys who spilt water on me, the last time."
"Did they hurt you?", he asked his voice went angry. I shoke my head. It was so hard to talk about it.
When I didn't continued, his muscles tensed.
"If they have touched you.." he began but I shoke my head again.
"They didn't touch me." I sighed, lowered my head and forced myself to tell him.
"They have talked about my brother."
Yongguk didn't say anything. I closed my eyes. They silence was so painfull.
"What did they say?", he finally asked. There was no emotion in his voice.
My hands began to shake. I tried to stop it, but it doesn't work.
So I just folded my hand and continued telling him everything.
"They sad, that it was my fault. It's my and my mother's fault that he dead." Tearse filt again my eyes. I hold them closed.
"They have really said that?". I just nodded.
He hold me tighter and said in a voice full with anger: "Tomorrow I'll get them."

"No, don't.", I went down of his lap and stood. My look on the place we were. 
It was so beautiful. It was a little park on a low mountain. Ice was seen on the grass. It was so sparkly.
Yongguk stood also up.
"It's so beautiful here. From who do you know this place?"
"Don't try to change the topic.", he said. I sighed.
"Why don't you want me to beat them up?", he asked.
"Because I don't want you to leave me again." I gave back. I looked up to him and he seemed confiused.
"Leaving you? Why should I lea..", then he reminded his previous conviction. He went quiet.
"Do you know what the funny thing is about this all?" I looked to the beautiful sunset.
"They were right." I laughed bitter.
"What are y..."
"Not in everything of course.", I interrupted him. "But in some points. He worked so hard to give us food. He forgot himself."
My eyes filt again with tears but this time I wasn't holding it. I just let the tears run over my cheeks.
"The painful thing was when they asked me, if I wasn't ashamed. That I never go to my brothers grave."
The tears were running and running.
"Katara..."
"But they are right. I have never went to his grave. But I didn't do that because I didn't cared about him. I didn't went there because it would be like an end. I would lose him forever if I would say goodbye."
I fell on my knees and my hands were on the ground.
"Youngjae oppa. Please forgive me! PLEASE!", I shouted. I couldn't handle myself and cried.

At first Yongguk didn't say anything and left me alone. But when I didn't stop crying he grab my arms on put me on my feets.
"Yah, Katara", he said. I continued crying.
"I didn't knew that you feel like this.", his  voice broked. I looked at him. His eyes were sparkly.
"You should have told me." he said.

I hugged him and began falling again into sobs. It was all so painfull.

When I finally stopped crying, he put me on his back and walked the way to my home. 
"Yongguk." I said.
"Hmm?"
"Please don't do something to the guys."
He didn't anwer.
"I don't want to lose you."
Again he didn't answer. He put me of his back and looked confiused to him.
"You're at home." , he explained. I tourned arround and saw our little apartement. 
I blushed a bit. It was embarassing that I felt so well on his back.
"Go home and sleep.", he was about to go but I hold his wrist.
"Hmm?", he looked at me. I bit my lips. 
"Come in with me.", I said and looked into his eyes. They went round.
"What?"
I released my hand and blushed.
"You were there for me. So can I may offer you a hot tea before you go?", my heart did some loopings.
"But your mother..."
"She won't mind. And anyway she didn't see you a long time ago. She would be happy to see Gukkie again."

He blushed a bit. My mom loved him really. He was politly, good looking and open. When he went to the prison my mom was visiting all sunday to give him food. He was ashamed of his past, but my mom and I didn't cared. We knew it wasn't his fault.

"Katara, I don't know, it's late and tomo..."
"Yeah, I know, tomorrow we have school, but just one tea ok?" I pushed him towards the door.
I knew it was late, but I wanted to have him on my side. I felt complete when he was there.

"Mom?", I called after I had open the door. There were no light in the house.
"Umma?", I called a bit louder.
"Maybe she's sleeping." Yongguk explained.
"No, she never sleeps before I go to bed." I switched the light on. It was still quiet.
"Strange..", I said. I went to her room but she wasn't there. I went to the living room and saw a piece of paper, where was written:

Pabo. I'll see you in two weeks. Don't make any bad things while I'm gone, arasso? There's ramen in the kitchen and rice. I left some mone. It isn't much, but I hope enough for surving the next two weeks. If  you do a mess of my house, I'll kill you, arasso. Take care of you.
In love
Umma

Yongguk was reading along. It was strange. Absolutly strange for my mom to leave me without talking to me in person.
But I didn't thought much abouted. Maybe there was a problem in her work and she had to help.
"So we two are alone now." I tourned arround to Yongguk.
"Yes...alone.", he repeated.
Immidiatlly I blushed and went to the kitchen.
I made the tea hot and came back. He was sitting on the coach and looked around.
"Nothing has changed, since the last time." he said in amuse.
"We don't have money so how should we change somthing." I smiled. He smiled back. He didn't care that I was poor. This was also one of the reasons why I loved him.
After we drunk our tea, we just sat there. The silence was so akward. Finally he cleared his throat and said:
"I think I should go now. It's already eleven." he stood up and I accompanied him to the door.

"Thank you again." I said.
"For what?"
"For beeing there for me."
He laughed and when sighed.
"What else should I do? Leaving you crying? No way."
I smiled and he smiled back.
"Katara.", his voice went serious.
"Yes?"
"You don't like this boy, do you? Daehyun."
I shoke my head. 'If course I don't like him pabo, I love you' I thought.
He just nodded. Again silence. Now I cleared my throat.
"Then I'll see you tomorrow." I said
"Mhmm." He turn arround and was about to go, when I reminded me of something.

"Yongguk wait!", I ran after him. He stopped.
"Don't do anything, what you'll regret, arasso?" I said. It came a little smile on his lips.
"I won't do anything." I nodded and smiled.
"Good. Then go home quickly and go sleep, arasso?" I told him.
"I will, so goodnight. I'll wait until your in your house again."
I nodded and went back.

I hold the door handle and pushed it down. It didn't open. I pushed again. Over and over again, but it was still closed.
'The key!' I thought and put my hands in my jeans. No key.
'Damn it!' I turned around and saw Yongguk laying on the ground. His stomach was hurting because burst into laugher.
"Yah, don't laugh!" but he didn't stop.
"You're such a Pabo, HAHAHAHAHAHA", he laughed. Almost dying.
But I also couldn't hide my smile. after this day. something funny had to come.

"I go to Mrs. Jung and I'll sleep there. I see you tomorrow." I played insulted.
"PAHAHAHAHAHAHA", he just continued.

'If I wouldn't love him, I would kill him for laughing at me.' I thought happy and went to Mrs Jung.