"Please.. stop… no... don't…," Seungri whispered achingly, gasping wildly for air. "No … no… stop …. Please... don't take my baby," he moaned softly.

 

"NO…NO… NO…." He was becoming more frantic, spent the night tossing and turning and running from the nightmares.

TOP was truly disappointed of Seungri’s condition when he study Seungri from across the table, playing with his half eaten food. He frowned, looking at the pale, thin features of Seungri where just weeks ago was a picture of health, having the glow of pregnancy.

"Seungri, don't play with your food, eat it," TOP tell him softly, pick up a small piece of meat with fork and bringing it up to Seungri's lips, persuade him to eat.

"I'm not hungry," Seungri muttered, turning away.

TOP sighed, wishing Seungri tell him all his problems. "Look Seungri, this is not good for you. Please, you have to eat something." He got up and walked around the table, squatting next to Seungri, who continue to look as if the world was coming to the end.

"I am not hungry," Seungri stressed out, pouting angrily. "Why can't you just leave me alone?" He curled in on himself, wrapping his arms around himself.

TOP brush back chestnut bangs, Seungri’s soft cheek before he flinched away. "Because I am worried about you. You're not yourself lately." TOP’s eyes filled with pain. He feel completely helpless about the situation he’s in. It was as if Seungri didn't want anyone to care for him, as if he didn't deserve any of it and TOP feel hurt seeing his lover like this.

"I'm fine," Seungri almost yell. He push himself away from the table, lunging to his feet, prepared to run, but his body had other plans. His world swam dizzily for a moment before his knees buckled and he was thankful that TOP had caught him before he hit the floor.

TOP lets out a soft curse as he swing Seungri's body into his arms, carrying his pregnant lover to their bed. With the added extra weight of being seven months pregnant, Seungri should weight more. Worry chew him endlessly when he realised how light his lover was. He carefully placed his precious Seungri in the middle of their bed, pulling the blanket to cover the slightly shivering Seungri.

"You have lost so much weight. Why you not eating? Why you not taking care of yourself," TOP accused, a harsh tone that contradict the tender hand that Seungri's jaw line.

Seungri didn't answer but sit up abruptly, one hand clap over his mouth, eyes wide with panic. TOP manage to get a small bowl for Seungri before he was violently throw up. He sit beside Seungri, feeling completely frustrating. Seungri was making the problems almost impossible to solve with his silence. TOP watch carefully as Seungri shuddered one last time and raised teary eyes to meet with his.

"I. Am. Fine," his stubborn lover still insisted.

And the last layer of his patience strip down. "Stop saying that," TOP yell at Seungri, jumping to his feet and turning away. "You not well and you won't let me help. Why the hell are you doing this? Don't you love me anymore? Can't you see how you are hurting me?" The last nearly came out in a scream. But TOP was meet with Seungri’s utter silence. TOP turn his head and his breath was stuck at his throat. Seungri was curled into a ball, shivering violently, his hand clasped over his head, his eyes impossibly wide with fright and shining with suppressed tears. TOP immediately go to his lover but was stunned when Seungri flinch away from him.

"Seungri?" TOP stretched out his hand slowly, offering it to his distraught lover. "Seungri, it's me, TOP," he spoke calmly. He reached out and touched Seungri’s hair, but pulled back abruptly when Seungri flinched again.

"Seungri!" Jiyong yell, barging into the room, followed by Daesung. Jiyong usually come this time to do check up on Seungri.

Frightened by the noise, Seungri tightened his grip on his head and rocked faster as he was becoming more frantic and muttered unknown words.

"Don't touch him," TOP warned, stopping his healer friend before he go to his friend’s side.

Jiyong’s eyes were wide, taking in the scene before look at TOP. "What happen to him?" He asked in a soft tone, knowing that loud voice would probably frightened Seungri more. He place his hand on his chest which was tightening painfully from the intense fear he was reading from Seungri.

TOP quickly explained in soft tones what exactly happen that led up to Seungri’s current situation. Daesung’s eyes become narrowed in concentration as he walk past TOP and squat next to the bed.

"Seungri," Daesung said in soft tone. "There is no one here to hurt you." As he speak, it appears some of what he saying don’t reach Seungri. "TOP is here. He love you and I think you scared a year's worth of his life." The rocking stopped, but the breathing was still laboured and, his eyes were still horrifyingly blank. "We all here, you not alone." Daesung notice the change of Seungri’s breathing and his eyes grew less wild. "That's right, Seungri, you are safe, we're here now. Your friends are here," With that Daesung reached out slowly and touched his friend, braced to pull back if Seungri flinched but was stunned when Seungri lunged into his arms, crying.

Daesung move into the bed, held Seungri tight in his arm, his hair and back, murmuring soothing words. After that, TOP step forward and take Seungri from Daesung, who immediately latched onto a source of comfort that was instantly recognised. He sat there still and let his lover cry his heart out.

Moments later, a very exhausted Seungri was put into bed, after Jiyong fail attempt to make Seungri eat. TOP was sitting on the bed, while Seungri cuddling next him, unwilling to let go his only source of comfort even in sleep, strong arms hugging him tightly in return.

"This is bad, TOP," Jiyong said worriedly, his eyes focus on Seungri's pale figure. "He's not eating, is he? Not sleeping well?" The healer sigh when TOP nod. "The stress is not good for him."

Daesung sit on the edge of the bed, his eyes filled with emotion but don’t say a word. His mind running with thought. Seungri he saw tonight was nothing like the lively, though sometimes annoying friend. He seem scared. But what was the cause? Daesung know it hurt them all to see Seungri like this, as he had become an important person in their lives.

TOP was in his normal stoic self, his eyes potray cold. "Please leave," he bit out in a controlled tone. "I want to be alone with him, now."

Jiyong and Daesung just nod, leaving the couple alone.

"I know you not sleeping, Seungri," TOP rumbled softly, feeling the body next to him tense. "We have to talk about this, you have to talk about this. It's tearing you apart."

"I'm fi…" Seungri begin.

TOP cut Seungri’s words. "If you say you’re fine just one more time, I swear l’ll shove you with food." His tone turn pleading as he stare deeply into Seungri’s eyes. "Please, I'm losing you and I don't know to stop it."

Seungri frowned, slightly confused. "I'm right here."

"No, you're not," TOP shake his head. "You’re leaving me, Seungri." Tears pooled in his eyes and flow silently, showing how hurt he is.

Seungri reach out and capture the moisture with his finger tips, staring at it in shock. As long as Seungri had know his lover, he had never showed his weakness this way. Seungri felt his heart breaking, knowing that he was the cause of TOP's hurting. "TOP." He buried his face into TOP’s chest, feeling the slow steady heartbeat beneath his ear. "I’m so scared."

TOP cup Seungri's cheek tenderly, turning his lover up to face him. "I love you very much. I will do anything to protect you. I will never let anyone hurt you, Seungri," he sighed. "But I can't protect you if you keep secret from me."

Seungri let out a small smile as he snuggle in the one place he knew nothing could hurt him, he finally relaxed and the couple shared a moment of companionable silence.

"I have a nightmare." Seungri's breath hitch before he continue. "They are going to take our baby away. What if it become true? They...,” his voice broke unable to continue. TOP's arms tightened around him.

"Shhh," TOP murmured softly while his fingers tracing random patterns on Seungri's back. He shock to know the reason that was haunting his lover. "Don’t worry. I’m going to protect you and our baby. I promise." He vow.

Seungri finally felt a huge burden lift from his heart. It felt good to have someone to lean on. TOP would be here for him and their baby, he promised and, Seungri will be holding him to that promise.

Seungri tilt his head and stretched the short distance to mound their lips together. "I love you, TOP." He told his lover when they broke for air. But a loud rumble came from his own stomach broke the special moment.

TOP burst out laughing. "Hungry?" He rub his hand on top of Seungri’s swollen stomach affectionately and was rewarded by the kick from their baby. "I guess that's a yes."

"Sorry," Seungri blushed adorably, winning him a quick kiss before TOP move away from them and help him up in search of food.