You know that feeling when you believe someone is watching you? Yeah, that’s exactly how I feel right now. And that’s what caused me to snap open my eyes. And I was right, someone was watching me.

His eyes pierced into mine for a second as he stood there, next to the bed – his bed that I was sleeping in. God, when did I fall asleep? I could tell that it was still Saturday because small traces of light shone in through the window. Well it could also be the sun rising on the morning.

That’s when it struck me, nothing was covering my face. In haste I brought my hands up to my face and shielded it from his gaze. But it was too late. He had already seen it, because he suddenly took a hold of my hands, they where warm and that feeling of security filled my heart.

“Who did this to you?” his voice was full of concern as he bent down and traced his index finger along my cheek. I flinched under his touch. It hurt. I looked away, hesitant. What if he wouldn’t believe me? What if he thought I was just lying? I sighed and then turned my head around, so that I could look at him straight in the eyes.

“My mom”

I saw how his eyes shot open and his posture froze for a second. But that was it; I didn’t want to talk more about it so I just asked why he was here. A small smile could be seen on his lips as he sat down on the bed, which caused me to scoot away so that he got some space.

“Yeon Ji said she had a surprise for me, that’s why. But I couldn’t find her so I went in here to wait” he explained and it was not that hard to tell that she had tricked us both into meeting each other. Well at least she succeeded with the surprise part, because I never expected that I would meet Sung Yeol here.

“Oh” was the only word that escaped my lips. It felt somewhat awkward; I didn’t know what to say right now, even though I wanted to talk about the whole ordeal with Hoya. He needed to know, about the past we shared.

I looked up at him, his lips caught my eyes and I blushed slightly. My mind traveled back to our first kiss. The one we shared that semi-cold day one and a half month ago. How I just wanted to grab onto his shirt and pull him closer towards me, so that our lips would meet again. I missed it, to feel his soft and warm lips against mine.

“Are you okay?” he reached his hand and placed it on my forehead, as if he thought I was getting sick. But I weren’t.

I backed away from him when all the emotions that I’d stored inside of me suddenly broke loose, and I started to cry, masses. Tears after tears where rolling down my cheeks. “Why are you crying?” I saw how he bent forward and touched my cheek with his index finger as he wiped away the tears in a gentle motion, so that it wouldn’t hurt.

“Because I love you, and I hurt you”

He stopped and pulled away his hand from my face and let it sink down onto the bed. He looked me in the eyes, carefully. As if he was searching for something. But then he stopped and turned his whole body around. So that the only thing I could see was his back.

Minutes past by without a single word from Sung Yeol, I was quiet myself since I didn’t know what I was suppose to say. “Hoya” I didn’t understand why Sung Yeol’s said Hoya’s name, his tone weren’t angry, nor did he seem to be frustrated, then why?

“He was my best friend before he moved to Seoul” I told him the truth. I didn’t want to lie to him anymore. “Is that why you came to Seoul, for Hoya’s sake?” he turned to look at me and I nodded my head once. He didn’t say anything more.

“I came here to confess” my voice was low, almost inaudible. But I had said it. I had finally stated why I came here in the first place. And that was to confess my love to Hoya, that I loved him. But as noted, it didn’t turn out the way I wanted.

“I’m sorry, I never wanted it to turn out like this, and I was so naïve when I first came here. Thinking that Hoya would accept me right away, and I never believed that I could fall in-love again. I never thought that I would love someone else than Hoya. But I do. I love you, only you. I don’t want Hoya. I thought I wanted him. Because I’ve lived my whole life believing that I was going to spend the rest of my life together with him. And when I meet him again, five years had passed and all those feelings I once had for him broke loose. But they where all just fake, I didn’t love him. The feelings that surfaced weren’t that sort of love. But ‘best friend’ love”

I felt how he grabbed a hold of my hand and his finger gently back and forth against my skin. “I know, he told me about your relationship” Sung Yeol shifted his gaze from our hands and pierced his eyes into mine.

“I love you” his words made me a bit taken back, because I never thought he would say that. I thought that it would be over. All the feelings I had for Sung Yeol took over and I plunged forwards and pushed him down so that his back hit the bed, before I bent down and planted my lips on his.

I felt how he replied immediately and thus causing all my fears of him not loving me anymore to flood out from my heart and mind, as he sneaked an arm around my neck and brought me closer towards him.

After a moment of passionately kissing I pulled away and stared down at him. Something between a smile and a smirk was plastered on his lips and I let out a small laugh.

“I love you too”