I where doubting myself, maybe it wasn’t such a great decision to meet Hoya after all. Not if that meeting took place at Woolim Entertainment’s practice building where anyone could hear it.

“Why do you want to meet here?” I sat down on the couch as he closed the door, my heart jumped slightly when I heard that the door locked as well. What was he going to do? He turned around, his eyes where piercing into mine and his lips curved upwards, he was smiling.

I gulped as I watched him slump down next to me, which caused me to scoot further away from him. Afraid over what he might do, this where not a time to play around. It was a serious matter. He needed to stop with this, now.

“H-Hoya” , I stuttered. Why had it be so darn hard to just say no.

“I – You – We need to stop this. I have Sung Yeol, only Sung Yeol” I began, though my words started to stuck at the end, all because of that Hoya had scooted closer towards me. I had nowhere to escape.

“Stop” I held my hands up in front of my face, as if that would be protection enough. It wasn’t. He gently took a hold of my wrists and pulled me closer to himself. His face where just inches away from mine and I felt my heart thump in that oh so familiar way, the only problem was that it where beating for the wrong person.

“Please” my voice was low, almost inaudible as he closed the gap between us and I couldn’t turn away, it felt as if I where put under a spell, Hoya’s.

His lips graced mine.

I felt how his arm sneaked around my waist as the other one was gently placed under my chin, thus tipping it upwards so that he could reach more easily. I couldn’t refuse. My lips immediately replied. I’ve never believed that one could love to persons, but knowing my situation. I now believed it. It was no doubt.

I pulled away in haste when I saw Sung Yeol’s face in front of my eyes. Not literally, but emotionally. Hoya looked at me, surprised. It took a while for me to recall my breath and set my heart at peace. “I don’t love you” my tone was harsh and I felt really bad about using that tone, but apparently that was the only way to make him understand. And with that I exited the room quietly.

I’d done the same thing as he did a few months ago, rejected the one I love.

~~

I don’t think being in the piano room had ever been this bothersome. I where in pain, a lot of pain, I’d rejected my first love, the one I shared so many memories with. All the laughter, cries, smiles and sadness we had shared with each other. They could never be undone. But they could be protected and cherished. And that was exactly what I was going to do. Keep them in my heart.

My mind was steadily set on Sung Yeol, what if he found out, that I kissed Hoya, not just one time, but two.

I heard how my cell phone started to ring, sighing I picked it up and glanced at the ID, Sung Yeol. I gulped. Stay calm, don’t freak out. After taking a deep breath I answered with a happy tone. No need to make him worry.

“Mi Yeon-ah what do you want as birthday present?” his question brought me back to earth, carp. I’d totally forgotten that it was my twentieth birthday tomorrow. Crap. Not good. “Don’t worry, I don’t need anything” I tried to remain calm, despite that my inner was having a war. One was chanting for Sung Yeol, while the other part was cheering for Hoya. “Teeeeell me” I laughed at Sung Yeol’s childish self. It was cute.

“Hm, the only thing I want is a kiss” I felt my cheeks heat at the suggestion. It was not normal for me to be this blunt and tell others what I want.

“A kiss? Okay”

*Tomorrow I’ll show him how much I truly love him. Starting now, I’m not going to care about Hoya any more. I’m not going to fall in his traps.*

“Mi Yeon, I need to go, recording” Sung Yeol hastily spoke and it was just in time that I managed to tell him a small hwaiting and a sweet dreams. After putting the phone back down in my pocket I stared at the piano in front of me. Now would be the perfect time to compose a song.

Four hours later and long into the night I’d finally managed to write a decent song. It had already gotten itself a name; my second lover. It was a slow mellow ballad track that describes the hardship of someone who loves two people at the same time.

The clock had already hit 2.00AM; it was no use with going home. I could easily just sleep on the couch in the cafeteria, no one where here anyway.

Said and done, I where a couple of minutes later laying on the couch, thinking. About how all this could end up like this. If I didn’t appear at their doorstep that august night a few months ago, then this would never had happened. I knew that much. My fault, all this was only my fault. Not Hoya’s and definitely not Sung Yeol’s. He didn’t know a thing.

Love, it can be so wonderful when you love the right person.

Love, it can be so painful when you love the wrong person.

Love, it is painful when you love two persons.