OMG THIS IS THE LAST CHAPTER!!!!

BUT DON'T WORRY THERE IS AN EPILOGUE! So technically there is one more chapter... So this chapter was super long. I wasn't gonna to the epilogue but it got to long so i had to cut it. Except the epilogue soon

I want to thank everyone that stuck by and read spy my heart from beginning to end. I love you guys. THANK YOU READERS!!! Please led me know what you think of the story. Is there a part that you didn't understand that i should have explained more? Don't worry when i upload the epilogue i will read this story again and start editiing

again THANK YOU TO ALL MY READERS AND TO EVERYONE THAT COMMENTED ON THIS STORY

 I hope you like this chapter! :D

Alex point of view

                Tick.

Tock.

Tick.

Tock.

I crossed my right leg over my left, shaking it in the air as I crossed my arms. I let out a heavy breath as I stared at her with annoyance. I shouldn’t be here. I don’t want to be here. My friends need me. I need to set up Kris’s funeral. I need to call my mom and make sure she is alright. I need to check on Junsu, Daesung, and Zelo. I need to get Jongup to do something. I have too much to do. This is pointless.

“How’s Onew?” She asked with caution knowing how emotional I have been lately.

I don’t blame her. Yesterday, I beat the out of some dude in a checkout lane when I was getting groceries for my apartment.  The was being a loud on the phone when the cashier was trying to help him. Then he was being rude. I just snapped and launched at him. A normal person would have done the same. Maybe not. Well that’s not the only time. Ever since Russia, I snap at the littlest things. Annoying people at checkout lanes, a smart agent saying the wrong thing, and of course no one letting me drink my sorrows away. People are on high alert around me for they know I am a ticking time bomb.

“He’s dealing.” I breathed out running a hand through my hair. “For the time being he is staying with me. I am helping him as much as I can, but I am also still grieving.”

She nodded seriously. I watched as she leaned over the large oak desk. She pressed her hands against her forehead as she looked down. She is still in shock about everything that happened in Russia.

These past few days that Onew has been with me all he does is sit around looking into a blank wall. His eyes doesn’t hold any life at all. I would have to make him eat, shower, and even sleep. Onew slept in my bed. Not in the ual way so don’t even think about it. He slept next to me cause he told me every time he closed his eyes he saw her. Her life less face just staring at him with wide eyes and blood coming out of . It scared him. Some nights he would wake up screaming her name as he sobbed out loud. I would just hold him as I cried with him. Both of us saying sorry to her. I took care of him because I understood. I went through all of that when I lost Jongup except I didn’t have anyone with me. I was too stubborn to let anyone in.

Almost all the Agents immediately came to the States after everything just like I ordered. Some of the injured stayed with some agents until they were well enough to return. South Korean Agents returned with us to help us back on our feet. They proved their loyalty to us by staying by our sides. Their boss, Leeteuk, has been working with Hyori on trying to undo all of Jr’s damage. When I mean all the damage I mean all the damage. The nuclear plans are to be destroyed because the bomb in the plans can put the atomic bomb to shame. Or so I heard. But I highly doubt they will destroy it. They just want us to think they did. That’s our government. Hyori told me that the prototypes that Jr had made are for sure being destroyed in some lab. The secretary of defense has assigned Hyori as temporary boss until one is decided. Both Hyori and Leeteuk are to help decide. Where is Jr?

Well that bastard is currently in our holding cells until the United States government figures out what to do with him. He is heavily guarded and watched. Why is he guarded? It seems everyone here believes I would go down there to kill him. Death is too easy for that bastard. I would torture him until he begs me for death. Then when he does I would laugh and refuse to kill him. I would continue to torture him.

“How about you?” She asked looking up at me. I stared at her serious brown eyes with a heavy glare as if telling her ‘what you think’! She let out a heavy sigh again. I rolled my eyes at her looking away to the side. We were in Jr’s office well now Hyori’s office. Hyori sat behind the desk almost examining me. “I’m sorry, Alex.”

“I don’t need your apologies or pity!” I snapped glaring at her. “This is my fault! What happened was my fault.”

“No, it’s not. No one could have prevented what happened.”

“I could have.”

“No! Alex, you can’t blame yourself for everything bad that happens. You can’t blame yourself for this. She wouldn’t want you to be like this!”

“What the hell, do you know? You don’t know anything!” I yelled standing up from my chair. She doesn’t know . This is all my fault. My fault alone. She is dead because of me. I have her grieving depressed partner in my partner because it was my fault. I had to call her parents and tell them their little girl is gone because of me. This is all my fault. “I’m leaving!” I simply growled out as I turned to leave.

“Alex! Wait.” Hyori yelled after me. I faced the door just glaring at it loathing that it was there. I heard Hyori get up from her chair as she made her way towards me. “Please, sit. Please.” She begged.

Turning around I looked right at her. Her eyes filled with sadness as she stared at me begging. She pointed back to the seat that I got up from. I looked from her to the seat then back at her again. I don’t want to. I don’t want to be here. I don’t want to talk about anything. Everyone already thinks I should see a therapist, but I refuse. Narrowing my eyes at Hyori’s as if warning her not to try anything, I made my way back to the chair. I slammed myself back down much to her relief.

“Why did you call me here, Hyori? Don’t say it’s to talk cause I don’t feel like talking yet. Or even ever.” I breathed out still glaring at her. Hyori let out a heavy sigh rubbing her temples as she sat back down on her chair.

“I called you here because you have been chosen to take over the Bureau.” Hyori got straight to the point. “The sec-“

“No.”

“No?”

“No! I don’t want to take over. Why can’t you do it?”

“I’m retired!” She retorted.

“Then unretire!” I argued.

“No! I don’t want to! I have a family to take care of!” Hyori argued back.

“A perfect reason for you to do this!”

“Alex, please! Don’t be difficult about this. You are the only one qualified to take over. Not only that, but everyone here trust you with their lives. You have everyone’s loyalty. We trust that you will run this Bureau to a greater future.”

“Should I do something to lose their trust?” I challenged earning a glare from Hyori. “I am unstable, Hyori. Even I admit how much I am unstable. I can’t run this Bureau like this.”

“I know. I am going to be running it until I see you are stable enough to takeover.” She agreed with my words.

 It is true. I am ed up right now. I just lost my best friend, who wouldn’t be ed up after that. Although I must admit I was worse when I believed I lost Jongup. Speaking of Jongup. I pulled out my phone looking at the time. It’s almost two. I got up ignoring Hyori’s piercing stare.

“Can I get back to you on that? I have some where to be now. It will give you my decision later.” I breathed out making my way to the door.

“This is not something you get to decide! Alex you-” Hyori yelled after me, but I quickly walked out slamming the door cutting her off.

Everyone stared at me bewildered then looked away quickly when I glared at them. I scowled as I moved my legs to leave this area. They want me to take over? Hell to the no! Do they not realize that is the worst thing ever? I don’t even stay in my division long enough to do paper work. I get someone else to do it. I love the field work too much. I am to hot headed and short tempered to deal with the government and . They might throw me in jail for cursing out people in higher positions. NSA, FBI, Secretary of Defense, Hell even the President. Are they really sure they want me to do this?

“Hola! Mamacita!” I heard a voice flirt with a fake Spanish accent. I let out a groan of annoyance as I looked up to see Leeteuk coming towards me. I glared at his smiling face with disdain. He is just like Daesung. Annoying! “Did Hyori tell you the good news?” He breathed out.

“How you’re a pain in my ?” I growled. I continued to walk away wanting to lose him, but no he followed behind me. “Don’t you have a bingo game to go to?”

“Nope! I don’t even like bingo!”

“Why are you following me?”

“Because we are both y, free, and single!” He said proudly with a wide smile. I scoffed picking up my pace to get away from him. Leeteuk only picked up his pace to match mine. I turned to glare at him. I groaned in annoyance. Noticing my glare Leeteuk clapped his hands together rubbing them up and down. “Sorry, Sorry!”

“Go away!” I simply told him stepping outside into the busy outside world. Leeteuk continued to follow me all the way to my motorcycle. Once I reached my black beauty I stopped abruptly making him run into my back. With a scowl permanently plastered on my face I turned around.  Leeteuk smiled at me innocently showing me his dimples. “Why are you so annoying? Aren’t you a boss of a Bureau? You act like a damn child. You are so annoying. You are also a pain in my . And y, free, and single? What are you saying? You do know the I am dealing with Lee Joon and another man right?”

“Oh yes. The love triangle. How is that going? Have you picked one?”

“You are infuriating. I don’t even know how you know all this about me?”

“I know a lot of things. I am almost like superman!” I stared at him. “Don’t give me that look.”

“Goodbye, Mr.Superman!” I let out sarcastically as I straddled my bike. I revved up the engine putting on my helmet cover my whole head. I breathed out backing up with my feet.

“Wait!” Leeteuk yelled. This better be important. I stopped looking at him yelling what. “I’m Mr. Simple actually.” I flicked him off making him laugh. “I like you, Alex. You are entertaining. I hope to see you lead this Bureau to success. I look forward to working with you. By the way, I wanted to say sorry for the whole sending Lee Joon to kill you then changing my mind. You see someone, meaning your old boss, infiltrated our higher ups bribing them to send the order to kill you. Well see ya!” With a wave he walked away leaving me standing there with a stupefied expression. There is something seriously wrong with that man!

Finally, regaining my senses I backed up and was soon racing down the busy streets of Washington D.C. I headed towards the hospital where Jongup is going to meet me. All the injured Agents are at the hospital getting treatment including Zelo, Daesung, and Junsu. Once Jr was captured Ren contacted Aron telling him that it was safe to bring Junsu out. Jaejoong was pissed beyond belief about the situation and spent hours yelling at him along with Yoochun. Both of them never left Junsu’s side since he arrived at the hospital here. I smiled softly thinking back to them. Idiots! Even though I tell them to stay out of it, they still get involved. A tear slipped down my cheeks as I thought of all my friends. They are the best people I could have ever encountered in my life. They would do anything for me even though I threaten them not to. They are a bunch of es. But they are loyal and the greatest people in the world. Nothing can make me replace them. And for that I have to be strong for them. My strength will give them strength.

I pulled up at the hospital braking hard at a parking letting the tires screech a little bit. Getting off my bike I placed my helmet down. I clicked it on the handles of the bike. I tightened my leather jacket around me to block the cold winter air. Walking towards the hospital I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket. With a sigh, I answered the call knowing who it was.

“Relax, Jongup! I just got here!” I immediately spoke not letting him talk first. I walked through the electric sliding doors a loud beep sounded signifying my arrival.

“Took you long enough. What did Hyori want?” Jongup’s voice echoed through the phone. “Where are you at?”

“Narnia.” I breathed out annoyed.

I passed many of the nurse’s as I walked through the hospital heading towards Zelo’s room. A nurse tried to stop me, but I just showed her my CIA badge shutting her up. The smell of bleach and fresh air nauseated me. I hate hospitals. They freak me out. I felt myself suppress a shiver as I kept walking through the busy hallways. I can’t be the only person feeling like this.

“No need to be a !” Jongup hissed. I rolled my eyes holding the phone against my ear. “Where are you?”

“Heading to Zelo’s room. Just meet me there.” I simply said hanging up on him.

 I smiled as I placed my phone back in my pocket. That will piss him off really bad. After many long hallways and annoying nurses, who wanted to see my ID, later I finally reached Zelo’s room. I chuckled as I saw Jongup standing in front of it with his arms crossed over his chest. A scowled covering his features as he tapped his foot down impatiently against the ground. I lifted an eyebrow just looking at him.

“It’s rude to hang up on people!” He growled once I reached him. I just stuck my tongue out at him. “You are a child.” I shrugged.

“You ready?” I breathed out looking at the door leading into the room.

 I can hear the guys on the other side talking amongst themselves. No one knows that Jongup is still alive besides everyone that went to Russia and Hyori. To say they were in shock is an understatement. Many asked him how he survived, but he told them he rather not talk about it. A lot of people that knew Jongup hugged him with tears of joy in their eyes. I made everyone swear to secrecy because I wanted to surprise B.A.P today. I texted all the members and told them to meet me at the hospital in Zelo’s room at two. I told them under any circumstances not to leave the room. If they did they will be in a bed next to Zelo.

Jongup let out a nervous laugh as he scratched the back of his head. His eyes darted everywhere. I softened my features looking at him with love. He’s nervous. I would be to.

“I guess?” He breathed out.

“You can do this. You will be fine. They will welcome you with open arms.” I encouraged him smiling softly. Placing my hands on his shoulder’s I squeezed it gently ignoring the sparks that went through me. “You got this!” He nodded. “Wait for my signal.” He nodded again and with that I walked into the room. I closed the door really fast before the guys saw him.

“Alex!” Zelo let out happily from his hospital bed. The guys stopped talking to look at me. All at once, they all ran to me besides Zelo and searched for injuries on me. They each took turns hugging me tightly. “I want a hug to!” Zelo whined from his bed opening his arms for me.

“Hey. How you feeling?” I breathed out carefully hugging him making sure not to hurt him. Once I pulled away I smiled sweetly at him. His head was bandaged up as well as his bare chest. I looked down searching for other injuries to see a cast on his leg. Hyori didn’t tell me he broke his leg. “Hyori didn’t tell me about your leg!” I growled. I cursed Hyori in my head. I hope she is sneezing to death now.

“I told her not to! It’s just a broken leg! It will heal in no time.” Zelo answered smiling. I chuckled shaking my head at him. I can’t stay mad around him. Moving my hand up, I grabbed his hand softly squeezing it softly. Zelo’s face brightened more as his eyes sparkled. “I’m ok. Just a little banged up. But the doctor said I am healing really fast. I should be out of this damn hospital in a few weeks.” I shook my head not liking the fact that he cursed. To me, Zelo would always be the sweet innocent kid that looked up to me.

“I’m glad. You are ok.” I breathed out. “If…if something happened. I wouldn’t be abl-“

“Hey. It’s ok.” Zelo breathed out as he shushed me softly. “I’m fine. I’m alive. That’s all that matters. I heard what you did to the woman that pushed me off. That wasn’t very nice.”

“She deserved it! You should have seen yourself at that time. You were unconscious. You looked-” I shook my head not wanting to think about that day at the division games. “She deserved everything it did to her and more. If something happened to you. I would not have hesitated in torturing her to death.”

“Yeah, I know that. But you could have gotten hurt. Either way I wish I was there. I heard you were amazing. Himchan told me you looked like a demon.” Zelo exclaimed looking like an excited child.

I rolled my eyes turning towards Himchan. Himchan flinched under my playful glare. His hands shot up as if for surrender.

“I just told him what I saw. It’s not my fault I tell the truth!” Himchan exclaimed. I let go of Zelo’s hand taking a step towards Himchan. “A-Alex!” He warned.

“So the truth is that I look like a demon?” I questioned. Himchan went to move out of the way, but I quickly grabbed him by his collar. I leaned towards him in a threatening manner. His eyes were wide in fear. “Do I look like a demon now?” He shook his head no furiously. I can hear the guys’ chuckle behind me. Himchan looked to the nightstand holding a cheeseburger. With his left hand he grabbed it holding it towards me.

“Cheesyburger?” Himchan smiled innocently as he held up the burger to me.

And with that I lost it. I let go of Himchan laughing really hard. I grabbed a laughing Youngjae by the shoulders so I can lean on him. My stomach started to cramp as I kept laughing really hard. The guys were even laughing really hard with me. They made fun of Himchan’s Cheesyburger making him pout. 

“I can’t anymore. I can’t.” I breathed out trying to regain my normal breathing. My eyes were watery. I wiped them. The guys also tried to calm down as they tried to regain their breaths. Pulling away from Youngjae I smiled at them. “I missed you guys. I’m sorry for everything. I never should have ignored you when everything with Jongup happened.”

“We understand. You needed your time and we waited for you. We are your brother’s, Alex. Never forget that. We will never leave you.” I heard Bang’s deep voice say out loud. My eyes watered as I looked at all the guys smiling at me. My heart clenched in joy. They don’t know how much that means to me. Then I remembered I have something for them. Jongup. “I am glad you made it safely back to us from Russia.”

“Yeah. You owe us a battle.” Daehyun exclaimed. I let out a laugh nodding my head.

“I know!” I exclaimed. I think it is the perfect time to show them their surprise. I moved towards the door ignoring their confused stares. “Actually guys. When I went to Russia I brought someone back with me.”

“Someone?” Zelo asked.

The guys looked at each other in confusion. I nodded happily. Exhaling a long breath I opened the door. I watched happily as the guy’s face went from confusion to disbelief to complete shock. Jongup up stepped into the room nervously looking at them awkwardly. I rolled my eyes. Men. If it was a woman going through this she would run to them crying while holding her friends. Silent tears went down the guys faces as they stood frozen in place their mouths hanging open. I closed the door behind Jongup. Time for me to not make this that awkward and get some laughs. B.A.P is my family.

“Hey guys! Guess who’s not dead!” I exclaimed out loud in an announcer voice. I held my arms out towards Jongup like if he was a shiny car and I was those show girls. Jongup turned his head towards me glaring playfully. I smiled brightly at him sticking out my tongue. I continued my announcer voice. “Found this little in Russia hiding in an abandoned building with my target. As you can see he looks the same except this time he has a scar above his right eye. For just the right price, this ninja bunny could be yours.”

“Damn it, Alex!” Jongup growled glaring at me.

“What?”

“I am not for sale!” That is seriously what he is pissed about. I crossed my arms over my chest giving him an expected look.

“You made me believe you were dead for two years making me go through hell and back. Then I go to Russia and find you with my target hiding in an apartment building. You owe me for making me go through that. I own you, Babe.” I cooed slapping his cheek softly. Jongup scowled at me in annoyance as I just smiled. “If I want to sell you, I can.” I turned back to the boys. “So what will it be boys? Wanna by him back. Just know there is no return policy!” Jongup opened his mouth to argue, but he was interrupted.

“Jongup?” Both Jongup and I turned towards the source to see Youngjae look at us with disbelief. “Are you really…Alive?”

Jongup nodded.

“You were alive this whole time?” Himchan breathed out.

Jongup nodded again.

“You were in Russia this whole time?” Daehyun asked.

He nodded again.

“For two years you kept the fact you were still alive hidden. Even from us?” Zelo said his voice breaking as he looked at Jongup completely hurt.

Jongup looked down at his feet feeling shame. He nodded his head sullenly. I looked at Bang knowing it was his turn to say something. Bang let out a heavy sigh walking forwards towards a guilty Jongup with a serious expression. I watched with caution as Jongup looked up at Bang with sadden eyes. Bang clenched his jaw and fisted his hands. He is mad. In one quick motion Bang lifted his hand up making Jongup and I flinch back. In one swift move Bang grabbed the back of Jongup’s head placing it against his chest. Tears went down Bang’s eyes while he closed his eyes.

“I’m glad you’re alive. You don’t know what you put us through.” Bang breathed out.

With that I watched in shock as Jongup cried. His sobs echoed the room as he grabbed Bang hugging him back. Ever since I knew Jongup I have never heard him cry this much before. He was always the tough guy. But here he is grabbing his leader for dear life sobbing out loud. He kept apologizing to him and to the guys over and over again. Soon enough all of us were giving them a group hug except Zelo who whined for us to move to him. We all huddled towards him and soon enough he joined in letting out his own tears.