Krystal POV

          I have been trying to call Amber since after that day but it’s just a waste. Sometimes, he turn off the phone or he doesn’t pick up. I am worry about him. When I ask Unnie that she saw Amber at company, she said no one in company see Amber lately. I tell Unnie to ask his manager and he said he himself can’t meet with him. He said he just has phone contact with him.

          Are we done like he said?! I made him left when finally he is with me after so many difficulties. There are my faults too. I cannot stop blaming myself. Why it is so difficult for us?! Why I can’t be with him peacefully?!

          There is dinner party tonight at SM company. Amber might come. I ask Unnie to explain everything when she see him. I cannot sleep yet. I am waiting Unnie and it’s almost 12am. She arrives home at nearly 1:00.

“Soo Jung, don’t you sleep yet?!”

“I am waiting for you, unnie. What did he say? Please tell me.”

Unnie looks sad.

“He didn’t even give me a chance to bring up that case. He was avoiding me.”

My tears come out and unnie hugs me and pats my head.

“Don’t cry, baby! I will tell him surely, ok?! I cannot stand watching you being like this.”

“It’s too late, unnie. I know. He doesn’t love me anymore. We are done like he said.”

I hug her back and cry.

Minho POV

          I was wrong and I know it. Soo Jung and Amber have to suffer because I did what I shouldn’t. I have a responsibility to explain. Amber didn’t come near me at dinner party night. He avoided me when I approached him. Today I will go to his home and explain it myself. That’s the only way to make him know that Soo Jung did nothing wrong.

          The door is locked when I arrive at his house. I go to the company also and look for him but didn’t found. Finally, I call his manager and he said Amber goes to America. I was late. He didn’t go there not just for filming. I get it now. I know now why he greeted everyone at dinner party night. He won’t coming back.

          I remember that he told once that his contract with company is almost due and he is planning to renew. But he won’t do it anymore now. He won’t coming back here too. If Soo Jung knows all of this, she will hurt more. Everything is my fault. I couldn’t forgive myself.

Krystal POV

          It’s already been a month that I have lost contact with Amber. Unnie is also busy with her comeback and I don’t want to give her more stress. I pretend like I’m okay but my inside are burning. I cannot stand anymore in the end and I go to company. I saw Yoona unnie and she hugs me as soon as she saw me.

“Soo Jung baby, Sica is not here, neither Amber. What brings you here?”

I hug her back.

“Bcoz I miss Unnies”

Yoona unnie laughs.

“Do you miss Amber already? Poor baby, you still have a year to go. I am happy for him anyway. He will be more famous that he is now. There’s just one thing I’m upset. Soo Jung, tell him when you are on phone with him that we are so mad that he doesn’t even bid goodbye before he’s going to Hollywood.”

I don’t know what to say anymore.

He left?!

I feel tears rushing to my eyes.

          I bid goodbye to Yoona Unnie and back home. I am crying on the way home. We really are done. He hates me now and left away. I don’t want to live anymore too.

Jessica POV

          When I arrive to company, Yoona tells me that Soo Jung came. When I back home, I go to her room but she isn’t there. I go to the kitchen and she is drinking. I go to her right away and grab the bottle.

“Soo Jung, why are you drinking? Don’t you know that is not good for your health?!

“I don’t need to be healthy though. It’s better that I die.”

She is saying without looking at me. And then she turns to me and there’s tears all over her face.

“Unnie, you know it, right?! You know that Amber left for America, right?!”

What should I answer back?! I didn’t tell her that I don’t want to watch her suffering like this right now.

I nod.

“Why?! Why didn’t you tell me?! WHY?!!!”

She yells.

“I also know that after a week since he left. He didn’t tell to anyone.”

          She doesn’t say anymore. She hugs me and cries like a child. It’s worse that she is drunk. I don’t know how much she’s tired that she falls asleep while crying in my arms. I call some housekeepers and take her to her room. I am also very tired and go to bed soon. I go and check her the next morning. She is still sleeping. Her eyes are swollen and puffy. I don’t know how much she cried last night. I continue watching at her sleeping figure.

          She awakes a while later. She sees me but didn’t say anything. She closes her eyes and holds her head. Seems she has a headache. She was drunk much last night. She usually doesn’t drink. I know she doesn’t want to talk. I pat her head.

“Soo Jung, I will make you a porridge. Go and wash up and come downstairs. I will prepare some medicine too.”

She nods.

          I go to the kitchen and make some porridge. She comes while I’m having breakfast and eat the porridge and medicine. She whispers thank you before she goes back to her room.

          I know she is suffering too much. I rarely see her next days. She doesn’t go out and always stays in her room. She comes downstairs when she had a meal and go back to her room after. When I go to her room, she just looks up once and didn’t say anything. She is like emotionless. She doesn’t laugh, smile and talk anymore. She doesn’t really interact with family anymore. She is always being alone and cries.

          She becomes getting worse later. She doesn’t even have a meal together. I need to send the meal into her room. Mom and dad finally know about everything and they feel really sad and blame themselves for not taking good care of her. Mom hugs her and cries while dad is just looking at her sadly. She is not moving and not showing any emotions.

          That one day, she came downstairs and she said she wants to go out. We thought that she is trying to become normal again. We thought that she will start a new life finally. But we were wrong. She just wants to buy the sleeping drug. She knows that she can’t ask anyone to buy for her. That’s why she goes out and buys herself.

          I know it because I caught her while having the medicine that one night when I go and check she sleeps or not. She was shock to see me. I sense that something is not right and I go and forcefully take the drug and I found out that is sleeping drug. I cannot control anymore and broke out crying.

“Soo Jung, are you crazy?! Are you really crazy?!”

I ask her while crying.

“It’s better if I gone crazy than this life.”

She whispers back.

I hug her.

“Please! Don’t go this fur. Please think for mom and dad. And please think for me. What will we do if something happen to you?! Don’t you love us?!”

I am crying hard and ask her. She didn’t say back at first.

Later, she whispers.

“Unnie, I am so tired. So confuse. I don’t want to continue anymore.”

She cries.

This is the first time in 3 or 4 months that she shows her emotions. I hug her tight.

“Cry! Cry hard!! Don’t keep it inside. It will hurt you more.”

She starts crying hard.

After some minutes,

“I’m sorry, unnie. I won’t do this again.”

And she falls asleep.

          I’m being alert and watching her since the day after. I am worry that she might do something crazy again. But she doesn’t try anything again. I miss my old sister. I want her old side back. That’s why I want to help her. I call Amber but it’s a waste. He doesn’t pick up at all. Soo Jung’s situation is getting worse.

___________________________ x ____________________________

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~ CastorEnds and eunhaechulelf ~