Two weeks had gone by quickly, basically avoiding Kris and getting your homework done. It was a Thursday morning and you were having recess alone in the cafe in your school. You decided to eat at the cafe since it would be much more peaceful and you were also sick of the food in the canteen. Reom was absent from school today which you didn't ask. You didn't want to know either. It was better without her. For now.

  "One mocha brownine ice blended and a piece of Oreo cheesecake please." You got your money out from your wallet and paid for your order. You then looked for a cozy spot at the corner of the cafe and sat there. You leaned back in the chair and sighed. *Why do I feel so depressed?* You thought of Kris again. You felt like you were escaping from reality. You didn't understand why you were escaping from him. You should be listening to what he has got to say. But you just couldn't bring yourself to. You propped your elbows on the table and buried your face into your palms.

  "~~~?" A familiar voice called you and someone tapped your shoulder repeatedly. You stirred at your name. "Hmm?" You answered and raised your head from the table. Apparently, your head had somehow landed on the table because you fell asleep. You looked up and saw someone you didn't want to see. He was the last person you wanted to see. Kris.

  "Go away. I don't want to see you." You got up from your seat immediately, got your bag and pushed your way past Kris. But of course, it was impossible. He pulled you back with much force and you landed back on the cushion sofa. He didn't pull you hard. You were just too light. "~~~, please.. Please stay to listen to me." He pleaded. You looked at him and softened but composed yourself immediately. "Fine. Just 5 mins. And once the time is up, I'll leave." You said curtly, adjusting yourself on the seat. Kris sat down in the chair opposite you and placed both his hands on the table.

  "~~~, why are you avoiding me recently? Have I done anything wrong? I don't like it when you treat me like I'm transparent. Tell me what I've done wrong. I'll change." He asked and told you innocently. *You didn't know what you've done wrong? YOU KISSED HER.* But you said otherwise. "Nothing. Nothing's wrong. I'm not avoiding you." You denied. "No, don't lie to me, ~~~. I know something's wrong." He insisted. "No, really. Nothing." You denied further. "Tell me, please." And then, that was when you finally let everything out.

  "YOU. You, Kris. You kissed Reom. And I saw that. I saw it with my very own eyes. You know that I like you right?! How can you do that? And do you even know how I felt?! Do you like her?!" You screamed in his face. And everyone looked towards both of you. Kris bowed a few times to them apologetically before they continued with their things. Kris turned back to you and looked at you remorsefully. "I-I'm sorry. I-I.." He apologized as he held his tears back. "Don't apologize! Tell me what happened." You demanded as hot tears streamed down your face.

  "I-I can't tell you. I'm sorry ~~~. I'm really sorry." He held onto your hands. "Don't touch me! And don't apologize! I said don't. Tell me what happened. Don't tell me you can't tell me.." You yanked your hand roughly out of his.

  "I really can't ~~~.. Really. I'll tell you in future but not now. Please believe me. I don't like her. I like.." He stopped and now, his tears were flowing as well. "You like who? Say it. Tell me." You were getting softer now. "I.. I.." He didn't know what to say. "How do you expect me to believe you then? You said you don't like her, but you kissed her. You did, right? You did.." "I-I did.." He hung his head low. "Then I'm sorry. I can't believe you." You wiped your tears away and stood up, grabbing your bag and walked out of the cafe. This time, Kris didn't run after you.

  *Why? I know this is not true. I know there is a reason behind the kiss. But.. Why can't he tell me? Why..* You continued wiping your ever-flowing tears away with your hands. You ran all the way up to the rooftop. No, you weren't trying to commit suicide. You just wanted some peace. For once, you decided to skip lesson. You got to the rooftop which was the garden and sat on the bench. You didn't know there was a garden there but you were glad there was and the rooftop wasn't locked.

  You sat on the bench and continued crying. You were overwhelmed with everything. You couldn't accept what Kris had said earlier. *Why is my life full of tears? I knew it was all too great in the past. Nothing good will last.* You hated it. You hated the fact that you were so weak. But what could you do about it? Nothing. You were about to break down again when Kai appeared.

  The door flung open and Kai ran towards you. Kai squat down to your level and enveloped you in a tight hug. You grew confused at the sudden hug. "Don't jump, ~~~. Don't end your life just like that? I don't know what will happen to me if you die." Kai croaked. It took a few seconds for his words to sink in before you burst into laughter. It had been a long time since you laughed genuinely. Kai let go of you and looked at you, confused. 

  "I wasn't trying to commit suicide." You said with a laugh. He tilted his head and stared like you as if you just said something in alien language. It was silent for 3 seconds. "What?! You weren't?!" He opened his eyes wide open. "No I wasn't." You continued laughing. "I thought you were." He covered his face red in embarrassment. "No I wouldn't because I know you wouldn't have the will to live if I died." You . "Yes, I wouldn't.." He muttered so softly you asked for him to repeat but he shook his head and said nothing. "I saw you climb up the rooftop so I thought you were going to jump." He mumbled in his hands. You lifted his face up. "Why would I be sitting here if I wanted to jump? And does it mean that everyone who comes up to the rooftop wants to jump? Silly. I think you watched to much dramas." You smiled. "Thanks for making me laugh anyway. It's been a long time since I had laughed like that." Your smile disappeared and you grew sad.

  "Hey, come on. Cheer up, ~~~. Remember I said I don't want to see you cry in front of me because of another guy?" He scooted over, closer to you and placed his arms over your shoulder. You held back your tears when you remembered Kai's words.

  "So, how is it going between you and Kris? Is it going well?" Kai knew he shouldn't bring it up but he was curious. He wanted to know what was happening between you and Kris, whether it was turning for the better. So that he knew his position in your heart perhaps? "Not really.. Things are not going well. I talked to him just know. More like he talked to me. But.. He isn't telling me anything when i demanded the truth. It's like he didn't want to tell me. It's alright. I don't want to know either." You told Kai but you were lying. You want to know what was happening. You desperately wanted to know. "Sorry, ~~~. I can't do anything about this. I really want to help you. But I can't.." He grew softer.

  "Shh.." You hushed him. "It's not your fault. It's alright. Maybe it's better not to know." He looked at you and kept quiet.

  "Wait, if you're here, that means you skipped lessons?" "Yup, nothing abnormal. I'm Kai, remember?" He winked and you laughed. "I know right. Even if you're in school, you would skip the lessons by sneaking out often right?" You raised your eyebrows. "How did you know?" He asked, surprised. "I'm not ~~~ for nothing." You winked. You were picking up this habit from the boys. Be it Zico or Kai or anyone. And it was kind of becoming a bad habit.

  You looked at Kai, admiring his side view. *I think I like Kai's presence more and more. I love the way he always cheers me up.* Were you falling for Kai already? You didn't know because your  decisions were still blur to you but it seemed like it.

  "Let's go for our last lesson? Math lesson?" He suggested. "At least we didn't miss too much of a lesson? And Math is important to skip since the exams are approaching. And moreover, it's not right for a good girl to skip lessons right?" He commented smartly.

  "It's surprising you would say that. I thought you didn't bother about studies." You .

  "It sure is alright for me though." He rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly.

  You walked back to class together with Kai since both of you had maths lesson together. Kai held up his hand "If this is a lighter, what is this?" He raised his hand higher. "Uhm.. I don't know." "Highlighter!" He jumped and announced. Both of you burst into laughter. Kai was always making you laugh, making you smile. The whole walk to classroom was full of his lame jokes, trying to make you happy. And you were really happy because of him.

  Both of you arrived in class and stepped in as both of you ducked your heads, prepared to be scolded by your teacher. True enough, she did. "Kim Jongin! Lee ~~~! where have both of you been?! This is my first warning to you. The next time, you two will be serving detention. Now, go back to your seats." She ordered. "Neh, songsaengnim." Both of you ducked your heads, avoiding eye contacts with your classmates but both of you looked at each other and laughed softly. Inside joke.

  Kris was looking at the contact between you an Kai. He hated it. He never wanted you to be so close with Kai. Call him selfish but he wanted to keep youth himself. He frowned when he saw Kai sat beside you. He frowned even harder when he saw you laugh at what Kai said. But he knew he had no right to say a thing. *~~~, you have to believe me. I don't love Reom.. No, I don't love her. I'm sorry I can't tell you now. But I love.. You. I love you, ~~~.*

  "Okay, lessons are over. Do remember to bring your Maths notebook the next lesson for checking." Your teacher left after saying. You all were dismissed. Both you and Kai started packing your bags. "Going anywhere?" Kai placed his pencil case into his bag. "Yeah. I'm meeting my brothers at the school gate and going home together with them." You told him as you kept your purple water bottle. "I'll accompany you to your brothers." He offered kindly. You agreed to his offer immediately.

  You and Kai were walking along the hallway, past the lockers and discussing about everything.

  "~~~!" You heard Kris call you. You stopped but you didn't turn back. Kai looked at you then looked at Kris who was approaching, uneasily. You turned back to face Kris when he came closer. You couldn't avoid Kris anymore. *From today onwards, I'm not going to avoid Kris anymore.* You face Kris, "Yes?" You asked him, no longer with that warm eyes. You were talking to him like how you talked to a stranger.

  "Can-can we talk? Just the two of us?" 

  "~~~, I'll wait for you here." Kai got the signal and walked away so that you could talk to Kris.

  "No, it's okay. Stay here, oppa. Stay here." You pulled him back by your side and turned back to Kris. "Say. Say whatever you've got to say. I'm in a hurry."You looked at Kris and gave him a poker face. Yes, you were being a by doing that but who cares? You were too disappointed, too pissed with him. And to add on, the presence of Kai made you feel safer.

  Kris looked at Kai then at you. Kai didn't seem like his buddy anymore. Both of them were rivals. "I'm sorry about just now." He apologized. "But I really can't tell you." "Are you here just to tell me that? Because if you are, I'm gonna leave." You gave him your expressionless face. Kris didn't know what to say. He didn't expect that from you. You looked at him while he looked on the floor. You couldn't take it anymore. You didn't say anything else but walked away, grabbing Kai's hand.

  When both of you were a few meters away from Kris, Kai opened his mouth. "~~~, are you alright?" "Yeah, I am." You swallowed your saliva hard. *I know you're not.* Kai thought but he didn't say it out. He squeezed your hand tighter.

--------------------

  "Why are both of you holding hands?" Youngjae raised a brow. You pulled your hand away from Kai's immediately, face red. "Something cropped up earlier, Hyung." Kai answered for you. "That doesn't give you the permission to touch my girl." Youngjae glared at Kai. Kai looked away at the hostility. "Oppa. That's rude." You warned Youngjae but Youngjae didn't budge. "I'll go off first, ~~~. see you tomorrow." He waved goodbye to you and bowed to your brothers before he left.

  "You just scared Kai Oppa away." You cast a glare at Youngjae which made him scowled. All your brothers knew that Kai wanted to be more than just friends with you. Maybe just Daehyun, Youngjae and Jongup. Yongguk and Himchan weren't there during the camp so they probably didn't know and as for Zelo, he was too young to notice. In simpler terms, he was too dumb. Your three brothers who knew Kai's feelings for you, were starting to let you go. Jongup and Youngjae had the same mindset as Daehyun. To not stop you from getting into a relationship. Though Youngjae looked like he opposed really badly but inside, he didn't. He just hope that you wouldn't get hurt because of a relationship.

  "Come on oppas. Let's go home now." You smiled and linked arms with your two younger brothers. At the side, Youngjae and Daehyun looked at you affectionately. *I know that smile's a fake, ~~~. I swear I'm gonna kill that bastard who cause hurt to you. In the meantime, please be strong.* They both thought.

  Song of the chapter : Ailee, I'll show you