Onew’s POV

I'm very depressed. I messed things up with Taemin. I miss him even more now. I miss all of them. But I’m scared to talk to them. I’ve made them so angry. I didn’t mean it to come off as bragging. I only wanted to show him how cool I was. Taemin must hate me. I made him cry they said. I never wanted to hurt Taemin, I never wanted to make him cry.

I was home from work. I was bored. I walked around my house. I lay down on the living room floor. I turned my head I saw my xbox360 and my ps3 under the TV. I turned my head away quickly. I stood up. I felt sweaty and anxious. I felt really nervous. What was happening to me?

I really want to win the Xbox that looks like R2-D2. I really want to play, and go to the game store. I want to run across the hall and tell them am sorry. I’ve being a jerk!

 I don’t even know when I’m doing it until it’s too late.

 I really did turn into the people I hate. I’m one of them. I kicked the TV stand. Anger was mixing into to my sadness. I don’t think I felt the pain in my foot since I was so upset. I couldn’t control my emotions. I started crying really hard. I punched the wall.

My phone rang I didn’t answer. It went to voice mail. It rang again. “WHAT!?!?!” I picked up my phone and stared at the caller ID. I didn’t answer the call. “Just go away.” I said to my phone.  It was one of them calling. I wish it was Taemin calling.

I kept crying. “I’m a jerk.” I sobbed. My phone rang again. “ GOD DAMN IT, WHAT?”

Same guy was calling me. I answered this time. “Hey” My voice was mono tone.

“Hey.”

“Well?” I said annoyed.

“So there is someone I want you to meet.”

“Man, I can’t come out tonight. I have to work earlier tomorrow.” I rubbed my forehand, my head was throbbing. I really didn’t want to deal with this.

“Dude, sleep is overrated.” I hated when people said that. I rolled my eyes.

“I’ve been going out almost every night, a few times a week, Thursday, Friday, and Saturday. I need to sleep.”

“Jinki, I thought you were cool.”

“I am cool! I’ll be there.” I hit end.

“Fricking! frick! frick!” I squeezed my phone and threw it on the couch. I did it again. I got too worked up and now I have to go. I hate myself, I can’t stop it.

I know I should just Not go, but something is making me go even when I don’t want too. “What is happening to me?” I asked myself again as I cried slower now. I’m too sick and tired of it all, I can’t even cry hard anymore.

I walked into my room, and flung myself onto the bed.  “Dear god, could you send Taemin over please. I’m too scared to face him right now. I need his advice again. I need his friendship again. Give me a sign. I know I’ve lost the 3 of them forever. I want to go back to the way it was before. I just wanted to be the man Taemin wanted me to be.”

I feel asleep. I had a dream Key kicked in my door and yelled at me and told me to eat all my food and that I should go to bed at a reasonable hour, Jonghyun walked in after him and sat on my couch playing his guitar and Taemin skipped in talking about something cute. Key started cleaning my house; Taemin was smiling at me as if they were not there. I smiled back, he was about to tell me something…

I was ripped from my dream when my phone rang. I looked at the time, then went and got my phone. I was late.

“I’m on my way. It’s the last time I’m ever going out!” I said into the phone before they said anything, and I hung up.

…….

I arrived. Same junk as always. Why did I like this stuff to begin with? What did this have to do with being confident and cool? All this has done is make me feel worse. This people don’t really like me. These people only like me because I’m cute not because I’m awesome on the inside.

I thought I saw someone, is that Taemin? Please be Taemin to take me away from here.

 I walked closer, no it was not Taemin. I pouted. “Screw this, I’m outta here.”

I was about to leave but the person that called me spotted me. “.”

“Hey Jinki, what was that phone call about, you not coming out anymore?” He laughed and slung his arm around my neck leading me to his table.

I did not answer him. The night sort of went by in a blur. I wasn’t paying attention to anyone even though I smiled and nodded my head at the right times when people talked to me. My thoughts were filled with my real friends, Jonghyun, Key and my best friend in the whole world, Taemin.

…..

The night went on, I had to meet his other friends, and then I met this girl. She was talking to me. I hardly heard a word she said. I was too busy thinking of Taemin the whole time.

I couldn’t get him out of my head. What was he going to tell me in my dream?

The lady wanted to dance I told her no. She started doing cute poses thinking I’d change my mind. I told her to go out and dance and I’d watch.

I just wanted her away from me. I did watch her walk out to the dance floor, I didn’t see her dancing, because I pictured Taemin and Jonghyun and Key dancing with me. Key doing his silly booty girl group dance. I chuckled to myself remembering that night.  Taemin looked so perfect that night. I don’t even know if I told him he looked nice. Did I tell him he looked good the time when he came here without key and Jonghyun?  Well, he did. He looked so pretty, his smile makes me smile every time I see it.

Most of the time I go out I always think of him with me. But tonight it’s nonstop. I realized I have been inconsiderate of their feelings. I understand now how it looked like bragging. I’m such an idiot. But Taemin has been friendly with me when we do talk even though I now know I haven’t really talked to him all that much this whole month. Maybe he doesn’t hate me … no, who I’m I kidding? He does hate me too. I don’t even want to be friends with me and this time it’s nobody’s fault but my own.

All these thoughts are making me feel worse. I ordered myself a drink. I was getting sadder than I was at the house. Maybe I can drown in my sorrows as they say.

I drank my beer fast and ordered another. The more I drank the more Taemin popped in my head. Why I’m I thinking of him every minute of the day everyday and why is it getting worse?

I took another sip, the music started to sound strange, the lights seemed bright in there, was the music getting louder?

I picture myself dancing on the dance floor with Taemin, how he moved like he was music, his bright smile that could light the sky, his hair. I remembered him drying my shirt when Joon spilled his water on me. He hugged me and asked me to pet his hair. Oh god his hair was so soft.

“Oh my god, I’m so stupid, very stupid. This is embarrassing.” I laughed at myself. It hit me like a tsunami.    I love Taemin. This is why I feel like this. How could I have been so blind?

Every memory I ever had of Taemin flashed through my head. I have to get home right now and tell him…. Oh god he saw me with those girls and I wouldn’t shut the hell up. I’m an .  I hope it’s not too late.  

I was about to stand but the girl came back from dancing after a few songs. “So did I dance well?”

“I likey the way Tae dances, TaeTae dances the best in the whole wide world, so beautiful.”  Frick, I’m drunk. I opened my eyes wide. How’d that happen? I looked back at the table. Darn I drank more than 2.    I didn’t notice I had drunk about 5 or more beers and I drank them so fast.

“How’d you know my nickname is Tae? It’s short for Taeyeon.”

Oops. Crap no! no! “I meant. My friend. Tae-“

She cut me off she pulled on my hands standing me up. She was dancing up my side. Oh please stop, stop! I couldn’t open my mouth. Then my mind slipped into a thought of Taemin there instead.

Taemin liked my awesome insides all along, she clearly doesn’t. I need more than just his friendship. I just don’t like him, I f’ing love him. I grinned like a moron.

She is smiled at me.  Oh crap, I’m not smiling at you; I’m smiling because of Taemin. Open your mouth. Say something Jinki!!!

I put my hands on her shoulders and tried to focus. “I’m sorrwie, I can’t dance wit chu. I likey someone else.” I’m I speaking funny, like a baby? What the hell was in that drink? Do I always talk like this when I’m drunk? Shut up Jinki clear your head. Focus!

“You’re so cute, you’re Jinki right?”

 “Pwease stop grinding up against me.” Stop talking like a fricking baby you drunk pabo.

“But”

“Nope sorry. I have to go.” I stumbled forward.

“You can’t drive. Let me get you a taxi.” She giggled.

We stumbled over to the door. If she is drunk I can’t tell.

….

We reached my apartment. I was very giggly. I think I talked about Taemin all the way home or was I talking about him in my head and my mouth was closed. I know I was smiling really big because she said I had a nice smile I think. Or was I thinking of Taemin telling me that?

“Where’s your key?”

“Hahah Key.”

“Yes your key.”

“No you said Keybum. Get it?”

She looked so confused and I almost pee’d myself because she didn’t understand my fricking awesome joke. Whoa I have to sit down. My head is spinning.

She dug in my pocket trying to find my key I think. But she touched me, there. I slapped her hand away.

“Oh my.” She blushed. What the hell was she blushing about?

“That does not belong to you.” ha! I told her. I smiled more knowing I told her that was not hers.

She pulled out my key and unlocked the door.

She shoved the door open and walked me to my room as my arm was around her so I wouldn’t fall over.  I sat down on the bed. I had to get back up though as soon as I sat down. I had to go pee.

“Bye” I said to her and I waved.

I walked out of my room. “I have to pee.” I talked to myself as I opened the bathroom door.

I finished up and washed my hands and looked for aspirin “it’s always better to take one now so in the morning I don’t feel like dog poopy.” I talked to myself again.

I walked back into my room, my lights were off. Were they off when I went to the potty? I’m I still using baby words? Oh god my head. I yanked off my shirt and plopped down on the bed.

I rolled onto my stomach and stretched my arms up under my pillow. 

I felt something touch my leg. "Tae?”

I heard nothing. Sleep took over me.

………………..

Taemin’s POV.

Key and Jonghyun and I were working on my surprise the rest of the day after work. I still had Jinki hyung’s key. I was going to go over and make him breakfast. Talk to him and have a really nice morning. Then when he goes to work, I was going to sneak back in and decorate his house. I’ll make the cookies at his house so his house will smell really good like sugar cookies. I made him a card with a poem. I think he will find it very cute. When he gets home from work I will confess my love.

I was thinking in the shower this morning about how the next morning after he showed us his new look, Key had said that we broke Jinki, where’s the Jinki hyung manual?… well maybe all I have to do is find his reset button. I’ll just reboot him just like a game.

So today is the day no matter what…Step one is going over there to make him scrambled eggs and chicken.

I got dressed and walked across the hall.

I opened the door.

“Hyung?” Good he is still sleeping.  I tip-toed into his kitchen and started on breakfast.

I was almost done when I heard the bedroom door open and the bathroom door shut. I smiled. I hurried up and put his food on his plate.

I came out of the kitchen and walked towards where his bedroom and bathroom meet. But I saw something move in his bed. I thought I heard him shut the bathroom door, guess not. I walked in his room and plopped down on his bed. “Jinki hyung!” I started tickling him.

“AHHHHHH!!!”

“AHHHHHH!”

I feel backwards off the bed. I scrambled to my feet. There was a lady staring back at me. I turned away I didn’t want to see her face OR anything else.

“What the heck!?!” Jinki hyung ran into the room faster than light when he heard us scream. Jinki saw me then her. “Oh my god!”

“Hyung!”

“Taemin!”

“Oh my I’m so sorry, I didn’t know you had company. I have to go.” I ran out of his apartment just as fast as he ran in here to see me in his room.

“Taemin come back!” I heard him yell after me as I ran out his front door.

Onew’s  POV

“Damn it. Get out of my house woman! I said bye to you last night why are you still here?” I rummaged on the floor for my shirt. I needed to hurry. Thank god I woke up with pants on.

“I must have fallen asleep, how’d I get here though.”She stood up and straightened her dress.

“We were drunk and you brought me home in a taxi, you better not have done anything to me when I feel asleep.”

“I remember now, I fell asleep when you went pee. You better not have done anything to me!”

“I did not do ANYTHING to you! I like Taemin. I told you all damn night that, I like someone else. I love Taemin.”  I never said it out loud before. I realized what I had just said and I felt happy so I said it again not to her but myself, the world too maybe? “I love Taemin!” I felt brave, I felt whole, and I felt confident from the love I felt overwhelmed with.

I ran out of the house once I got my shirt over my head and dashed over to Key and Taemin’s.

How many MVP's want to slap the crap out of that woman for touching Jinki's privates? Becuase I do.

Everyone come back tomorrow ..we'll all run over to TaeKey's to see what Jinki is going to do???

But in the mean time... YAY!!!! Jinki knows he loves Taemin!!! *does happy dance* Let’s all cerebrate that small victory. *hugs all the readers*

p.s. Drunk Jinki is kinda cute speaking baby talk. kekekeke.