The whole pack is frozen. Baekhyun and Chen, who’ve just lied Sulli down onto the couch, still look like they’re in the middle of doing it, their arms hanging in the air. You take a moment to focus on your triangle tattoo, on pin-pointing everyone’s location, and your heart rate spikes up when you feel Sulli’s absence.

Your eyes snap towards her body.

“We didn’t feel it,” you say. “So she can’t be dead.”

“She’s not dead, her heart’s beating,” says Baek. He finally straightens up. Yunho walks towards Sulli, a bit jerkily, and crouches down in front of the couch. He checks for her vital signs while the whole pack just stands around awkward and tense.

“Dal,” says Kai. You snap your eyes at him. “Can you feel her presence?”

“No,” you reply, shaking your head. “I didn’t even notice she was gone, I was too caught-up with what was happening, I think. Now that I focused—I can sense that she’s gone, but. It’s n0t—she’s not dead. Her presence, it’s not…empty.”

“What the heck is going on then?” Amber asks, her voice shaking.

“What the hell happened up there?” Krystal questions. “The power got cut off, the entire building was vibrating.”

“We summoned the goddess,” says Luhan, scratching his head furiously. “Somehow, it ended up taking Sulli’s body.”

“As a vessel,” you add.

“But why?” Chanyeol asks. “We didn’t know it was going to happen, did we?”

“Of course not,” you say angrily. “I’d never—“

You click your mouth shut, feeling guilt built up in your gut. Tears threaten to drop down your cheeks. You’d never expose Sulli like this, you’d never put her in danger such as this. Eris was flying around in her spiritual form, you just assumed that Harmonia will do the same.

“Let’s think,” Kris says. “And calm down. Maybe Sulli’s been in this room the entire time, and we just can’t see her.”

“What if she’s having an astral projection?” asks Yixing.

“A what?” Daehyun asks, making a face.

“An out of body experience,” Suho explains.

The pack starts talking over each other, their voices layering. You’re trying to figure out what the hell happened, and Amber seems like she’s close to a panic attack. She’s crouching down next to the couch, her hand wrapped around Sulli’s palms, and she’s watching for any signs of her being in her body.

And then Siwon asks something that makes the entire room fall quiet.

“Is Sulli in love with Sehun?”

You blink a few times, your brain short-circulating and then coming back to life. You almost feel like there’s a machine in your mind that just got stuck and had to force-start again. You slowly look up at Siwon, giving him a look he can’t decipher; then you slowly look around the room. You’re all looking at each other now, all unsure and a bit uncomfortable.

“I mean…” starts Yixing, shrugging a little. He looks at Amber. “They’re…close.”

“How close?” Siwon asks.

“Why are you asking?” Min questions. “How is that important right now?”

“Gods and goddesses aren’t your regular kind of magic creatures. They’re ancient, and they know things without ever having learnt them; if Harmonia wanted to use someone’s body right after coming to our world, it’d only be logical that she used Dal’s. But she used Sulli’s. Why?”

“You think that she chose Sulli because Sulli has a close connection to Sehun?” asks Chanyeol. “And Eris was trapped inside Sehun’s body?”

“Yes.”

“Who said close connection was needed between the vessels to get rid of Eris?” Kyungsoo asks, frowning. He’s sitting on the table, his legs hanging off of it.

“Who said it wasn’t?” asks Siwon, quirking a brow.

“But Sehun is okay,” Min points out. “So why—“

“Can Sulli travel to other dimensions?” Heejin speaks up all of a sudden. At first, the pack looks at her, and then they all look at you and Siwon. “Siwon said that Harmonia came to our world. Does that mean she’s usually somewhere else?”

“Well, Sulli can see spirits,” you say. “That’s already a connection to the world in-between.”

“There’s an in-between world?” Minjoon asks. Well, more like gasps out, horrified. “Some kind of purgatory?”

“Not exactly,” you say. “It’s like a different layer of our world, one that we don’t see. A mirrored version of our world, or something, where spirits and ghosts hide if they don’t go to…Heaven. Or whatever. Sulli can connect to that world at all times. She sees glimpses of it when she talks to spirits. I’ve been there a few times. That’s where I go when I ghost walk.”

“Does Harmonia come from there?” Heejin asks, frowning.

“I don’t think she’s a one-dimensional being,” Siwon says. “I’m guessing that she can travel through time and space.”

“So is that a yes or a no?” Tao asks, rolling his eyes at Siwon.

Siwon lets out an exasperated sigh. “It’s a ‘maybe’. What’s your point, Heejin?”

They all look at the girl. Heejin visibly flushes, but she still tries to get her point across.

“Sulli is connected to other worlds. She can see them and sense them. When Harmonia decided to take her body, they ended up sharing the same mind. Kinda. And then Harmonia left. What if she accidentally took Sulli with her?”

“So what, Sulli’s soul is currently wandering around the purgatory?” Minjoon asks.

“It’s not purgatory,” you say, closing your eyes so that you don’t roll them. You’re tired, nervous and annoyed; you can’t think straight. You feel someone’s warm hand on your neck and you startle a little; you open your eyes to see Chen on your side, trying to comfort you somehow.

“Okay, okay,” Taemin says. He raises his arms as if in surrender. “So basically, Sulli’s soul is where dead people should be, and we gotta go find her. Does that sound like the plot of ‘Insidious’ or is it just me?”

“This is too much,” Daehyun says. “First a goddess and now we have to go to purgatory to find Sulli?”

“It’s not purgatory!” you say, raising your voice. Daehyun’s eyes widen at that.

“Jesus, chill,” he grouses. Jessica kicks him in the shin. He stifles his yell, but still sends her a nasty look.

“This is not the worst we’ve had,” says Kyungsoo. “I mean. Remember Sunny?”

“And when she teamed up with that incubus?” adds Tao, cringing.

“And then NIS showed up and we thought we’re all going to end up in jail,” a new voice says. The whole pack whips their heads around to see Sehun standing by the entrance to the living room; he smiles weakly at you all.

“Sehun!” you gasp out. You run towards him and jump into his open arms, almost knocking him over. Luhan follows your example and drapes himself over Sehun, and then Tao bursts out crying and comes to join.

“I thought we’d lost you!” he yells over-dramatically.

“Let him breathe!” Kris scolds, seeing Sehun’s distressed face.

“It’s okay, I’m fine,” Sehun says, hugging Tao as he cries his eyes out. He looks around, spotting Sulli on the couch. “What’s going on? What happened?”

“You don’t remember anything?” Daehyun asks, weirded-out.

“The last thing I remember is the library,” says Sehun. His eyes are still pinned to Sulli, and he tries to pray Tao’s clingy arms away. He glances at you nervously, then back to Sulli, and finally steps away from Tao. “What’s going on? Why’s Sulli—“

“Eris took your body,” you say quickly. Sehun stops abruptly, his eyes widening. He looks at you like you’ve grown a second head. “You disappeared. We had to do something, and quick, before she could hurt you. We didn’t know what she’d do.”

“And?” Sehun asks. He looks to Sulli again. “You haven’t done anything dumb, have you?”

He walks over to the girl. He looks down at her, listening into her heartbeat, then looks around the room. Everyone’s watching him closely. He grows impatient.

“And?” he asks forcefully, his fists clenching. “Why is she unconscious?”

“The only way we could defeat Eris was by summoning her counterpart, Harmonia,” you explain, anxiety building up in you as well, mixed with guilt. Sehun fixes his eyes on you.

“Another goddess?” he asks. You can see his cheeks turning a little pinker than usual; he must be angry to the point of his blood warming up, which is incredible for a werewolf.

You nod. “Harmonia came and…for some reason, she took Sulli’s body.”

Sehun blinks. You feel a shiver run down his spine at how blank his face suddenly looks. Kai takes a step towards you, and then stands in front of you, partially hiding you from Sehun’s piercing eyes.

“Harmonia took down Eris, and then left. We think that she accidentally dragged Sulli along with her, to another dimension of our world.”

Sehun’s eye twitches. Then he tilts to the side a little, his body showing nonchalance, but his face screaming confusion. He squints a little, his expression twisting with disbelief and something akin to disdain.

“You thought it was a good idea to just let Harmonia take Sulli’s body?” he asks. He almost spits out the words, and the next time he glances up at you, his eyes flash blue.

“It wasn’t planned,” Siwon speaks up, his voice weirdly raised. He takes a step forward, and you suddenly realize that he’s trying to hide you from Sehun, just like Kai. He’s shielding both you and Kai, since he’s standing much closer to Sehun. He tries to take his attention. You look down at Sehun’s white knuckles, and you realize that he’s very distressed, and angrier than usually. Sehun isn’t the one to lose his cool in a situation like this. Your Sehun would’ve shot you a nasty look and told you that you’re going to talk about this later. Then he’d ask how he can help.

The Sehun in front of you is angry and not in full control.

“Calm down,” Luhan says. He also stands a bit closer to you. In fact, all the boys are acting protective of you; there’s something going on that only they, as Sehun’s pack mates, can sense. “Calm down, Sehun. Dal didn’t know Harmonia was going to take Sulli. We didn’t know anything, really, we just wanted to get you back.”

Sehun’s still staring at you. If he could, he would be drilling holes in your brain right now.

“I suggest we all calm down,” says Kyungsoo, his voice stone cold. “I don’t know how spiritual worlds work, but the longer we sit here doing nothing, the longer Sulli’s in danger.”

That gets everyone’s attention. Sehun looks down at Sulli, and Kai visibly relaxes in front of you. You swallow hard.

“I’m gonna go ghost walking,” you announce. “Kai needs to go with me, since it requires a lot of magic, and I don’t know how it’s gonna work if I’m apart from him.”

“Let me go too,” Kris proposes.

“No,” Kai shakes his head. “You need to stay in case something happens again.”

“He’s got a point,” Xiumin says.

“Let me go, then,” Sehun speaks up. You look at him dubiously. “I’ll help,” he adds, a bit hopelessly.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” Siwon says, crossing his arms over his chest and shooting Kai a hesitant look. “You’ve just been possessed by an old, powerful spirit. And you’re obviously still influenced by it.”

“I’m getting the hang of it,” Sehun mutters. He looks at you, long and hard. “Let me help.”

You glance at Kai, and Kai chooses that moment to look at you. You stare at each other for a few seconds. Then you exhale.

“Okay,” you say.

“How can we help?” Chanyeol asks. You’re already walking over to your backpack, to get out the chalk you need for the circle that’s going to take you to Sulli.

“You can’t,” you say. “Once we go ghost walking, we’re going to be in spiritual form. In a different place, where time doesn’t exist. We’ll be on our own.”

*

“When you go ghost walking, you mostly hear whispers and voices,” you say in the middle of drawing a mandala on the living room floor. “Whispers, words, sentences; some of them you’ll understand, most of them – you won’t. Images don’t come often, and I’m not sure if we’ll be able to see each other; I’ve only ever been there alone.”

“What if she’s not there?” Tao asks. “What if you go there and you won’t find her?”

“I should be able to feel her the second I go there,” you say. “If she’s there, we’ll know. If not, we’ll have to look elsewhere.”

“I don’t like this,” Eun informs you all.

“Me neither,” you admit, giving her a sympathetic look. “I hate ghost walking, and knowing that Kai and Sehun are going to be with me…” you look at the boys, who’re standing on the side, looking down at the mandala you’re drawing.

You feel scared. This time you’re not going alone, and that means you’re responsible for someone. Your magic will be the factor that decides whether or not you manage to go ghost walking, and whether or not you manage to find Sulli. You try not to think about the pain this journey is gonna cost you.

“Okay,” you say, finishing the mandala. You look at Yixing, who’s closest to Sulli. “Bring her here.”

Yixing picks her up like she weights nothing and easily walks over to the circle. She puts Sulli in the center, careful not to break any lines.

“If the lines are broken, it’s over,” you say. “We can’t come back. So be careful and don’t step on it,” you look around the room, making sure everyone heard that. “Okay.”

You walk over your backpack to get a sharpie, and then motion for Kai and Sehun to come closer. You draw the right sets of runes on their arms, and as you’re doing so, you explain ghost walking.

“First, you need to relax. Once inside the circle, you need to focus on Sulli and ghost walking, and only that. Try to clear your mind, and all that stuff,” you look up to make sure they’re listening just as you’re finishing drawing a Laguz rune on Sehun’s forearm. “You’ll feel my magic fill you up. It’ll probably be weird, for both of you. It’s a different type of magic, different from what I usually use, and it’ll make you drowsy. You’ll start to lose consciousness, and you need to give up to it. Don’t fight it, let it consume you.”

“What’s gonna happen once we’re ghost walking?” Sehun asks.

“It’ll be dark at first, with voices all around you,” you explain. “You’ll need to try and filter them. That’s why you need endless focus for this. If you can’t hear Sulli, try to sense her. If that doesn’t work, ask around, but only when you’re sure it’s safe.”

“Ask around?” Taemin parrots. “Are you telling me ghost walking is just…talking with spirits?”

“Most of the time,” you say. “Depends on how deep you go.”

“How deep have you been thus far?” Kai asks you, his voice a bit hesitant. You look up at him shyly, finishing drawing the final rune on his skin.

“I’ve barely scratched the surface each time,” you reply quietly. Then, a bit louder, so that Sehun knows it’s meant for him as well, “Try not to freak out once we’re there. It’s going to be bizarre at first, and you won’t believe it’s real, so it’ll be a trip on pure instinct.”

Sehun and Kai look at each other with matching terror in their eyes.

“Easy-peasy,” Sehun says sarcastically, looking away from Kai.

The three of you sit inside the mandala, circling Sulli, who’s curled up into a ball right in the center of it. You look up at the pack for the last time.

“Come back whole,” Kris says.

“Seriously though,” Taemin speaks up. “Don’t die.”

Kai nods at him. Taemin sends him a weak smile. You exchange glances with Eun, then with the rest of the pack. You see Heejin’s terrified eyes and Suho’s fearful ones.

“It’s just ghost walking,” you say to them. “We’ll be fine.” And with that, you wink at Heejin, Minjoon and Suho.

You, Kai and Sehun join hands, creating a circle inside a circle.

“Now focus,” you whisper.

*

You wake up to thousands of whispers.

Fear is the only thing you feel, but it’s not a physical one, because you don’t have a body. You can only see darkness. It’s almost palpable, solid.

But then you sense someone’s presence, and it’s not all the spirits floating around you, it’s Kai’s. He’s beside you and you can feel him.

Once you realize that, something changes around you. You see a pair of red eyes staring at you. It doesn’t feel real, because you don’t have eyes here, but they’re very real, and you know who they belong to.

The whole sensation of being here reminds you of lucid dreaming. You can’t exactly focus on the details, you can’t really see, but it all feels real.

“Kai,” you say. Your voice is hollow and non-existent. The whispers around you get quieter, you even hear some gasps; it always happens. It’s the spirits realizing there’s someone alive amongst them.

“Dal,” he speaks up. His voice is growly. A second later, you realize why.

It’s like Kai’s leaving a shadow. You suddenly see the shape he’s took. His eyes go from your level to much higher, and then you notice that he’s a wolf. His fur isn’t the same as always, though; it’s pure energy. It’s black and thick, and it keeps on flowing and changing. Strands of it seem to be evaporating into air like smoke.

You feel Sehun then. You turn your head to see a pair of blue eyes, staring at you in the darkness, and if you had lungs, your breath would hitch in them.

Sehun is a wolf, too. He’s smaller, but his fur is black as well, and it flows with energy.

“Sehun!” you exclaim. “You’re a wolf!”

You don’t see his expression – obviously – but you can somehow sense his surprise.

“And you look like a ing fairy,” he says with a snort that echoes in your ears. You can’t see yourself, you’ve tried; even looking down at your hands doesn’t work. “You look like you’re made of moonlight.” His eyes snap down, then to the side. “Hey, there’s—there’s a red ribbon tied to your pinkie. It’s connected to Kai’s paw.”

Something warm spreads inside you.

A red ribbon, a red string of fate.

Someone – or something – hisses right into your ear then. You gasp in surprise. More and more hisses erupt around you and the boys, and then you feel something run past you. A few somethings slide past your legs, touching you as they go, and giggling. You shiver.

“This way,” you say after focusing on your magical senses. You point in the right direction, still unable to see your hand. Seeing as the boys head to where you pointed at, though, you decide that you’re good. As you walk (float?), you take another look at both Kai and Sehun. You can only see their heads, really, and their glistening, colorful eyes. You can see the outline of their fur, but only up to their backs; you can’t see their paws or tails. It’s a bit unnerving.

The whispers around you grow louder. Someone next to you says ‘Sulli!’ and then runs away laughing. You try to stop fear from consuming you.

Her presence grows a bit stronger, but it’s still hard to pin-point where she is.

Then again, it’s not like this place is real. You’d be surprised to have an exact map of it.

Something scrunches under your feet and you look down. The ground is dark grey. Not black.

“Wait,” you say. You’ve never been this far. “It’s—“

Something tells you to look left, so you do. Images flash through your head. Blood, books, some people you’ve never seen. And then you see three creatures just sitting on the side, watching you.

They’re shapeless, black, with round, white eyes and no mouths. They’re not moving, just watching.

“Just keep on walking,” you say.

“We can lead you to her,” one of the things says.

“We know the way,” the second one adds.

“Let us help you,” the third one suggests. You just keep on walking, and you don’t dare to look back – that was way too disturbing.

Something keeps on running past your legs. Small things, like mice, but more transparent, and with human-like eyes on top of their heads. They make weird, squelchy sounds that remind you of giggling. You watch as one of them jumps from the ground by your feet and towards Kai, just to run past his paws. You can see them now.

And then someone calls out your name.

You freeze, because you recognize that voice.

You snap your head up.

“Minho,” you whisper.

*

Suho hands Heejin a mug of tea. The girl takes it and sends him a small smile.

He looks so calm on the outside.

Suho sits down next to her and turns on the TV. Minjoon joins them.

“You don’t have to be here if you don’t want to,” Suho says to them quietly. Heejin feels herself tearing up, because she’s dumb, and Minjoon shakes his head.

“Naw man,” he says. “We’ll stay. You’ve already dragged us, some ordinary people, into your nonsensical mutants’ all-around freak show, after all.”

“Oh my God, Minjoon,” Heeji says, shutting her eyes in embarrassment. Suho chuckles.

Meanwhile, Chen, Yixing, Seon, Myungsoo and Krystal are sitting by the kitchen table, and are watching the rest of the pack in the living room. Luhan and Kris in particular.

“Who do you think would propose first, Kris or Lu?” Chen asks all of a sudden. Yixing finishes slurping on noodles before replying.

“Kris,” he says.

“Really?” Krystal frowns. “I’d say Luhan. It crosses his mind way more often.”

“It does?” Chen’s eyes widen comically. “Wow.”

“It’s so weird that it’d be illegal,” says Myungsoo. “Like. There’s something such as illegal love. How ed up is that?”

“Ohh,” says Yixing. “Myungsoo used a bad wooord,” he sing-songs. Seon smiles at that.

“I bet they could do it somehow,” says Chen. “I mean. Dal can exorcise demons. She’s practically a priest already, no?”

“Now that’d be a wedding worth seeing,” Krystal laughs. “Two gays and a female priest.”

“Equality!” Chen yells, loud enough to wake Choco up from his slumber. “Oops. Sorry buddy.”

It’s way past eleven when Daehyun, Min and Yunho come to the loft with food and snacks. They don’t know how long they’re gonna be up, so they bought a lot, just in case.

They start giving out some cookies. Daehyun walks over to the couches, presenting the person closest to him – Suho – with a plate of cthem.

Suho looks at the cookies and then up at Daehyun. His eyes are filled with terror.

“I have a girlfriend,” he says, obviously offended more than he’s ever been in his life. At first, Daehyun is very confused; then someone in the room bursts out laughing and comments about Heejin and her baked goods take place.

*

Minho looks like a wolf, but his eyes are brown. They’re omega eyes.

He died as a lone wolf.

His fur is grey, not black like Sehun’s and Kai’s, and he looks more transparent. Somehow, you can still recognize him.

“This way,” he says, moving his head a little to the side. As on cue, everything around you turns white. It’s blinding and sudden, and you hiss in dissatisfaction. Minho disappears, and instead of him, you see a memory. It plays in your head like a broken record.

You see some children. They’re all looking down at you and laughing. You’re on the floor, and it looks like you’re at a school.

One of the kids spills something on top of your head.

“Can you see it?” you ask.

“What is it?” Sehun questions.

“Sometimes spirits communicate through memories and images,” you explain. “We need to follow a trail. I think Sulli’s trying to help us find her.”

You move forward. Everything around you is white, but not real. You can’t see the boys anymore, you can only sense them.

More and more memories make way into your head, and it assures you that you’re getting closer. You see everything from Sulli’s point of view.

You walk through a corridor and everyone turns their heads away from you as you walk past them. They look scared.

You wake up to see a woman standing next to your bed; she tells you to calm down.

You see a couple talking in hushed tones. The woman says something about a hospital for mentally ill children.

You see Amber.

She’s young, but her eyes are the exact same. She’s standing in front of you, surprised, and reaches out for you. It takes a few seconds, but you finally grab her hand.

These are all Sulli’s memories, and they’re full of pain and longing and loneliness.

A memory of her crying in her bed, her parents shouting outside.

A memory of her father, looking at her with terror and then slowly leaving the room, like she’s a wild animal that’s about to pounce.

Her teacher giving her a strange look as she stares at a spirit in the corner of the room.

Talking to a girl who’s committed suicide a few days ago at their school.

You can sense both Kai and Sehun growing sadder with every memory. You feel yourself crumbling down with tiredness and anxiousness, too. You focus on Sulli’s presence, it being the only thing that keeps you on your feet.

You take another step forward and the scenery around you changes. You’re standing in the middle of a meadow.

The sky is clear and blue above your head, and you can hear a river nearby. All around you, there’s an endless field of green, pink, yellow, white, and blue. Millions of flowers covering the space under your feet. There’s nothing here but flowers and grass, and birds flying by.

You look around carefully, awestruck.

“She’s here,” Sehun says. You look to where he’s pointing and you’re surprised to find him looking human. There’s energy flowing through him, though; swirling and dancing. You look at Kai. He’s in his human form, too.

You look around again. Sehun moves. You don’t know where he’s going, but you trust his instincts. You’re a few steps behind him when he stops, crouches down, and reaches out for something.

Whispers erupt all around you, and Sulli materializes out of thin air, Sehun’s hand on the side of her head, cupping it gently.

There’s pink energy surrounding her and flowing inside her.

*

“Are they alive?” you hear someone asking.

“Don’t be rude,” someone replies.

“What? I’m just saying. They look like rag dolls.”

“I wonder how you’d look if you came back from purgatory.”

“It’s not purgatory,” you say weakly, your lips quirking up in a smile.

“She’s alive!” someone yells. Another someone kicks them, and then you hear moans of pain. You open your eyes. Seon and Min are looking down at you, and they both outstretch their hands towards you at the same time. They heave you up, and Min catches you when you stumble, your brain literally floating in your skull.

“I might be sick,” you say with a surprised gasp.

“Someone get a bowl or something,” Min asks. “Sit down.”

You can barely see through the haze, but it’s enough to notice that Kai is looking very pale as he’s pulled upright by Daehyun and Kyungsoo, and that Sehun is holding Sulli, their foreheads touching.

*

“How did you know where she was?” you ask. Sehun doesn’t hear you at first, so you snap your fingers in front of his face. He stirs.

“What?” he asks, looking away from his phone for a second. You’re on the bus, on your way back to campus, and he’s been weirdly quiet.

“How did you know where Sulli was?” you repeat. “Back on the meadow.”

Sehun eyes you carefully and then truthfully replies, “I don’t know. I just felt her.”

You purse your lips, gazing at him.

“Sehun,” you say in a whisper. Sehun blinks lazily at you.

“Hm?”

“Do you love her?”

He looks slightly surprised at the question. At first, that is. Then his face goes back to neutral, and his eyes get a little glazy. He’s peaceful when he replies.

“Yeah. I do.” 

I feel like the half of you will absolutely hate me for this. For all of this. Just don't kill me please XD

On another note, some time ago I did an interview with TheDiamondMaiden. She inerviews authors here an aff and then posts them for everyone to see (with consent, of course). I kinda forgot to tell you guys, but here is my interview if anyone's interested.

See you soon my lovely banana coconut muffaroons!