CHAPTER INCLUDES SELFHARM

My heart is torn in two as I step backwards, my head is spinning like I'm on a round about and I'm getting dizzy, but can't get off. 

I storm out of the hall and sprint towards the bathroom, my head is aching as I push open the door to the final cubicle. I lock the door and sit on the toilet seat.

I can't live without him... I just can't!

My sight is blurry as I search my pockets, I find the blade that keeps me company. I push the blade down and scrape it along my wrist. I gasp as the shooting pain spreads through my body - I feel a slight pleasure and smile as I see thick red blood drip down from my arms.

With great pain comes great pleasure.

One cut becomes two, two becomes three, three becomes five and five becomes twenty.

I stop and look at my arm, it's covered in bloody red scratches from my elbow to my wrist. I lean back and close my eyes, the sudden loss of blood calms me and the pain makes me feel light.

I try to stand up but I stumble forward and hit my head on the door. I curl into a ball on the floor, clutching my head.

"Owh... my head..." I whimper as I get up and open the door, I stumble to the sink and wash my hand. I still feel the blood trickling down my arm as the bell rings. 

Sigh

I open the door with a blank face and take my seat before everyone else. I'm completely absent to the lesson and I stare out the window. I feel eyes on my back, I shiver a little as I know it's Baekhyun. In English, he sits right behind me. The stinging pain in my arm begininng to annoy me, tears of anger and sadness roll down my face as the lesson goes by.

As the bell sounds for the end of the day I get up out of my seat and sprint out of school, trying to avoid Baekhyun. I become nervous as I get closer to home, but I don't want to go back. I have nowhere else to go. My brains sparks as I come into thought.

Sehun!

I smile a little as I run in the direction of his house. My heart beat gets faster the closer I get to his door, I'm about to knock, but I become nervous.

He wasnt in school today...ill just... I'm visiting right?

I nod to myself and knock on his door, I hear slow footsteps approach the door. My head is po