A/N: Hope all my American readers had a Happy Thanksgiving! I unfortunately caught a cold from waiting in line all day for the VIXX concert, but it was totally worth it and I got a lot of writing done! Enjoy~

NOBODY KNOWS

If their initial change in popularity in Japan was upending, this was even more so. It was only a number two on the charts. Factually speaking, other Korean artists had been able to do the same. But it was their broken record that set them apart, and suddenly everybody wanted to talk to them. How does it feel to be such trailbazers for such a young group? For one from a label that started so small? Would you consider spending more time promoting in Japan, given your popularity? Will B.P.M be coming as well?

Jaejoong couldn't put into words how it felt. It was dreamlike. Hearing their songs on the radio, seeing themselves on TV, selling out concerts at bigger venues, and snagging enough pre-orders for their upcoming album to indicate they'd be able to do well on the album charts as well. But on the other hand, it was exhausting. They'd already had fairly full schedules planned before coming to Japan, and they had to squeeze even more into them after their most recent success. He realized how important their efforts were, but the lack of sleep and long recording sessions were beginning to wear on them. Both Yoochun and Changmin had to fight off colds, and Junsu was stuck wearing a splint outside of their TV appearances after spraining his wrist during practice.

But as it wound down to their return date to Korea, Yunho seemed to be the most exhausted out of all of them. He hadn't gotten sick or injured, thankfully, and he'd managed through their tour appearances with his usual stamina. But as leader, he was the one who generally stayed up the latest, practiced the longest, worked the hardest, and ate the least of their backstage meals. Though they shared a room together, more often than not, he got threatening if Jaejoong tried to stay up even if it was just to kiss him, and since he got up so early, Jaejoong had very few moments alone with him then, too. Having a temporary break in skinship wasn't too troubling to him, but what concerned him more were the traces of anxiety Yunho was clearly trying to hide and the fact that they'd had no time to talk about it. He assumed it had something to do with the upcoming press conference, or at least he hoped it was; if that was the case, Yunho would go back to his old self as soon as it was over. All the extra schedules and cuts taken to their rest time had made him more short tempered and distracted than usual, but if getting that event out of the way was what it took to make it better, there was nothing more Jaejoong could do but try to take some of the burden off of him in their remaining days in Japan.

About a week before they were set to go back, Hyunsoo nim faxed them over some papers from Korea. The first was a new Dispatch article featuring the teaser for the press conference he'd secretly promised them. Are wedding bells in the future for Starkiss's Gaeun?, the text queried. A source close to the singer suggests C&M's upcoming press conference will reveal an impending trip down the aisle for the girl group leader, baffling fans who saw the pictures of her dancing intimately with DBSK's Yunho, broken by Dispatch. Will Gaeun be defying all expectations and wedding the younger idol, or has she been fooling us all with who she's been romancing? Seems like we'll have to wait for the press conference to discover the truth!

“Nice of them to make it sound like Gaeun noona's tricking them, when they were the one who misinterpreted the photograph,” Changmin said drily. “I hope no one actually believes she's going to marry hyung, or we're going to have some angry fans when we get back.”

“There's no way I could possibly get married right now,” Yunho said, rubbing his forehead. “Unless the wife wants to be incredibly neglected. The fans don't think that outlandishly.”

“What wife?” Jaejoong asked, glaring.

“I'm speaking rhetorically here.” Yunho tossed the article aside and looked at the next papers the fax pile. “Ah, and here's the outline for the press conference and our upcoming schedules for when we get back to Korea.” He passed the schedule to Junsu and the press conference sheet to Yoochun. “What's the news? My head hurts too much for this right now.”

“Hmm... looks like hyungnim is making it a 'C&M family' press conference,” Yoochun said, scanning the page. “Probably to take some of the attention off of completely bluffing about Yunho hyung needing to be back to clarify anything. The conference will kick off about our achievement in Japan, and then move into announcing noona's engagement. Assuming the hoopla dies down from that, they'll announce B.P.M's first solo stage.”

“I hope people don't get fired up about us taking the long road with this whole thing,” Jaejoong said, pursing his lips. “It won't take them long to figure out that all of us knew the truth from the beginning. But hyungnim usually knows what he's doing...”

“If it goes as planned, they'll just be relieved hyung isn't dating or getting married, and that Starkiss isn't breaking up,” Changmin yawned. “Seriously, hyungnim planned out this whole thing, I'm sure he'll make it work. I'm more concerned about whether 'naptime' is on our Korea schedule.”

Junsu's forehead wrinkled. “I'm still trying to figure this out. It says we have some kind of showcase event almost right after we get back...?”

Yongsoo poked his head into the room. “About that-- it's a new addition the the schedule. It'll be your 3^rd anniversary that day, and your fans were clamoring for some sort of special event. It's just a five song mini-concert with some filler games thrown in. You'll need a rehearsal or two to prepare when we get back, but nothing major. You guys will have some rest before working on your next album, trust me. We can't have you collapsing while you're still on-the-rise, and Hyunsoo nim doesn't even have you planned for a comeback until next year. That's why we're going to be addressing your record breaking single in the conference rather than making you do a thousand interviews right off the bat.”

“Well, there's that, then,” Junsu sighed, setting the schedule aside. “I can take a five song showcase. Just no MV filmings until I sleep for a week.”

“Make that two,” Changmin said.

“Get some sleep now, then,” Yongsoo said. “You've done your reading homework, and there's nothing else for the day.”

“Don't mind if I do.” Junsu and Changmin immediately scampered off to their rooms before Yongsoo could change his mind, and Yoochun lazily yawned and followed after Junsu.

“You, too, Joongie ah,” Yunho said when he noticed that Jaejoong was staying in place.

“I will if you come with me.”

“I will this time.” He stood up and stretched. “God, my head is killing me...”

“Yunho... you're taking your vitamins and tonics, right?”

“Of course. But there's still nothing for it but sleep, which I'm all for right now.” He grabbed Jaejoong's hands and hoisted him up. “You taking care of yourself, too?”

“Yes. I've been the healthiest of all of you.” He wrapped his arm around Yunho's shoulder. “The press conference sounds like it will be fine, doesn't it?”

“It probably will be.”

“...that didn't sound very confident.”

“I just have a feeling that this won't be the end of it. If they can't do anything about me and noona anymore, they'll just go back to you and Soorin or you and me or Changmin, Yoochun, or Junsu with someone important. And it will keep on affecting the people from the outside looking in. Our fans, our family...”

“I know,” Jaejoong said gently.

“We just wanted to be singers. Why did we have to sign up for all this, too?”

“I don't know. Because the world isn't as kind as it should be?” He paused. “You still haven't talked to your family?”

“They'll find out the truth when everyone else does. At the conference.”

“Yunho...” Jaejoong looked at him seriously. “That's going to be a mistake. I know you're angry at your mother for not believing you, but if she really thinks you're dating, it's going to make it all the more difficult...”

Yunho winced. “I know,” he said flatly. “But does it matter if something that is already impossibly hard gets harder by degrees?”

“Yes. It matters to me a lot that I'm not disliked or misunderstood by your family or put off because they wanted noona as a daughter-in-law.” He threw himself down on the bed. “You can do what you want, but remember this is about me, too, please.”

Yunho stared at him, raking his teeth across his lip. “I know it's about you. That's why I can't think calmly about what comes next, because it's about you. What happens to you because of me is more important than what happens to me. I'm not being some sort of selfish here.”

“Wonderful. Then take your own past advice and talk to me about what you're thinking so I can at least say my piece. And I say you're being stubborn idiot by not telling them outright that you're not dating noona. It's not like you haven't said as much before. Just say it again and make me feel less like the one who's interloping.”

“How loving, Boojae.”

“How do you expect me to be loving when you've barely touched me all month?” He curled up on the bed and closed his eyes. “Sweet dreams. Jerk.”

He heard Yunho slide in next to him and felt him wrap his arms around his back. “I'm sorry, baby. Get some sleep.”

Jaejoong responded with a stubborn “hmph,” but waited quietly for the sound of Yunho's own breathing to even out, indicating he'd fallen asleep. Only once he was sure that Yunho had taken the break he so desperately needed did he finally relax into his arms and drift off himself, forgiving him quietly in the privacy of his mind.

0o0

Yongsoo's face pinched when they finally landed at the Incheon airport. “I got a call from security, guys,” he said. “Sounds like there's a problem at arrivals. Or lots of problems, I should say.”

“What this time?” Yunho asked wearily.

“Reporters. Of the tabloid variety. Your fans apparently aren't too thrilled with them for showing up, and there's been... antagonism.”

“Reporters,” Jaejoon echoed, running his fingers through his hair, which was freshly dyed back to its original shade. “But the press conference is today... why are they here?”

“We didn't invite everyone to the conference, just the publications and entertainment channels that matter. So the bottom of the barrel papers are here, probably hoping to get a quote or something so they can pretend that they have the 'inside scoop.' Which you aren't going to give them, by the way.”

“Naturally,” Yoochun said, yawning. “C'mon, let's just get this over with.”

“Easy for you to say,” Jaejoong said, glancing over at Yunho. His expression was tense, so Jaejoong took the hat he was wearing off and plunked down on top of Yunho's head, using the brim to make it harder to see his face. “The rest of us will take care of greeting the fans. You can just keep your head down and concentrate on making it through the gauntlet.”

Yunho smiled gratefully. “It will all be over soon,” he said, seeming to talk more to himself than anyone else.

“Yes. It will be.”

As soon as they made it to arrivals, an absolute cacophony assaulted them. There were fans responding to seeing them again after missing them all summer, and fans hastily trying to block the photographers edging up against the barriers, screaming at them to get out of the way and leave the group alone. Reporters were also screaming out questions, directed at Yunho. Was it hard spending so much time away from your girlfriend? Will you be revealing your relationship at the press conference? Is it true you've already proposed?

Yunho flinched, but remained silent. Security moved to block the cameras, and Yongsoo helped them make their way through. The fans were actually cooperating for once in making sure they had the room they needed, most likely realizing it would be better for everyone concerned if they got DBSK away from the reporters as quickly as possible.

“We believe in you, oppa!” they called after Yunho. “DBSK, hwaiting!”

As soon as they were outside, they quickly piled into their van, letting security take care of holding back the photographers. “We're going straight to the company, so don't worry about your bags for now,” Yongsoo said. “You guys can dress and prepare for the press conference there. Everything all right, Yunho?”

“Everything is all right.” Yunho pulled off the hat and placed it back on Jaejoong's head. “Let's just get this over with.”

Starkiss and B.P.M were both in the company building when they arrived, already dressed in their formal clothes. Before Jaejoong knew what was happening, Gaeun had run up to Yunho and Jaejoong and thrown her arms around the both of them.

“I'm sorry,” she said gently. “I'm so sorry.”

“Eh?” Jaejoong asked, carefully patting her on the back. “You didn't do anything...”

“Going outside to dance... I should have known better than to do that. I shouldn't put it past photographers to go where they're not supposed to. And I shouldn't have involved you in something that had to do with only me. I'm so sorry.”

“You were looking after us, too,” Yunho said kindly. “Really, if you hadn't helped us get that blind item out of the news, we'd be the ones in trouble right now.”

“Still, I swear that after today I won't involve you anymore. I feel like such a jerk.” she withdrew from them, dabbing her eyes. Younghyun, also dressed in nicer clothes, stepped up and put an arm around her shoulder.

“I'm sorry, Yunho-ssi,” he said, inclining his head. “I threw the cufflinks out, and soon as the conference is over, I'll change my hair... although it looks like I won't have to, since you've cut yours...”

“Don't worry about it,” Yunho said quickly. “It's not your fault Dispatch didn't do their homework properly.”

“Don't let it get you down, oppa,” Brie said brightly. “After today, everyone will know the truth, and you can get married to unni.”

“That certainly is the silver lining to all of this.”

“Besides, the Cassies haven't been biting, anyways,” Shinwon added. “They're just as excited to have the rumors out of the way so they can go on bragging about your second place single.”

“They've actually been surprisingly nice,” Gaeun admitted. “I mean, some of them are angry at me for not clearing up the rumor right away, but since you haven't cleared it up either, most of them realize they can't get away with yelling at only me.”

“That's because our artists are a united team,” Hyunsoo nim said, stepping into the room from the offices and causing them to collectively wince with his blue and yellow checked suit. “Welcome home, DBSK. I have dress clothes waiting for you in the dressing room, if you wouldn't mind. We have a very important schedule to keep.”

The five of them dressed quickly, and after running through a mock-reheresal with Hyunsoo nim, all three of the groups got into their vans to leave for the studio. Jaejoong was separated from Yunho in the car, but to his relief, Changmin actually seemed to be looking after him and smoothing out his blazer, just as Jaejoong would do for him.

It'll be fine, Jaejoong told himself. His nerves have just been getting the better of him, worrying about disappointing the fans and everything. Once we clear the air, everything will be fine.

His own nerves started acting up as soon as they were ushered backstage and given a brief view of what was waiting for them outside. The room was filled with reporters and photographers, though much more orderly ones than they'd left behind at the airport. Hyunsoo nim had said that Jaejoong would be the one answering the questions about their Japanese promotions, to shift some of the attention away from Yunho, but he couldn't help but wonder if some of the reporters would sneak in a few leading questions before Hyunsoo could address about Gaeun and Younghyun. And heaven forbid they even hint at something having to do with me and Yunho...

He felt a hand on his shoulder and turned around to see Chansik standing behind him. “You'll be fine, hyung,” he said, granting Jaejoong a smile. “Honestly, you should have heard your fans while you were gone. There was one evening when Jongwoo hyung and I were leaving the building and a few of them were standing across the street and yelled out 'Please tell us that Jaejoong oppa and Yunho oppa are okay!' You'll just be putting everyone's minds at ease.”

“Of course,” Jaejoong said, reaching out to pinch Chansik's cheek. “You and Shinwon ah are behaving yourselves, right? Trust me when I say that you don't want to get in this sort of situation.”

“The idea of that tart getting into a dating scandal with a woman is laughable,” Chansik snorted. “Considering that he's been confused for a woman by most of the female idols in the industry. But yeah, we're all right. Or at least I am. He's still the same flirt he always was.”

“Good. Stay that way. We'll take care of having all these silly issues for you.”

Jaejoong took a deep breath when they were finally called up to the press table. DBSK entered first, and Hyunsoo nim took the seat in between them and Starkiss and B.P.M. Cameras immediately went off, trying to get Yunho and Gaeun in the same frame, even though there were many other members separating them.

“Thank you for coming out today, and I apologize sincerely for the delay in sharing our information,” Hyunsoo nim said in his calm, pleasant voice. “As I'm sure you understand, our Dong Bang Shin Ki has been occupied with their promotions in Japan, for which they have been receiving international attention and record breaking sales. C&M will absolutely cooperate with you in sharing what information you have, and will indicate when we will be taking questions from the press. First, Dong Bang Shin Ki would like to address their news from Japan. Jaejoong goon, if you would?”

Jaejoong pulled his mic forward and began rattling off their sales figures and humbly discussing what an honor it was to be able to chart so high internationally and secure a record with Oricon. It felt odd not having Yunho handling the bulk of the professional talk, but he did the best he could, trying not to get distracted by the flashing cameras and recording devices aimed at him. After awhile, he passed the mic down to Junsu, who took over discussing their recently completed tour, and what would be coming up for them now they were back in Korea.

When they finished, Hyunsoo nim took up his mic again. “Now, if you have any questions for Dong Bang Shin Ki regarding their achievements in Japan and future schedules, we will take them now. Please note that they will only be answering questions on these subjects. We will be discussing the rumors originating with Dispatch following the first Q&A period.”

The reporters sighed, but obligingly kept their questions pertinent to their Japanese promotions. They all took turns answering, and one reporter timed the question “Is there anything about Korea you're homesick for when you're Japan?” right when Yunho was answering. He smiled broadly and started talking about the certain meals he missed before calmly passing the mic off to Changmin.

All in all, they kept their questions brief, most likely wanting to ease the conference into something they were actually interested in. If they wanted more quotes on their record breaking single, they could pull information up from their Japanese interviews. Gaeun's case was arguably much more newsworthy, which somewhat annoyed Jaejoong given how hard they had worked to achieve what success they did.

“Now,” Hyunsoo nim said, keeping his voice pleasant. “The moment you've been waiting for. Once again, I beg forgiveness for not speaking about the matter outright, but there were more concerned parties other than just my own artists. I thought it best to sort the matter out internally before addressing it publicly, and now that we have, I trust we can discuss this as clearly as possible. There is a reason in particular we are choosing to do this through a press conference rather than through a written statement. First of all, I would like to address the nature of the photographs taken by Dispatch. Clearly, the hairstyle and cufflinks of the man photographed would indicate DBSK's Jung Yunho. But as you will see yourself in this picture taken of DBSK at the event--” he lifted a blown up photograph for the audience to see-- “there are clearly not cufflinks present on Yunho's dress shirt. Perhaps he could have taken them off, but once again, the images and videos taken at the event are not in agreement. As you see here, this photograph of Gaeun was taken at 12:00 a.m.” He pointed to the time stamp on Dispatch's photo. “But as you can see here, Jung Yunho was on the dance floor at 12:00 a.m, along with Kim Jaejoong, Park Yoochun, Kim Junsu, Seo Chansik, Lee Shinwon, Park Jongwoo, Huang Chaozhi, Park Soorin, Brie Kwon, and the bride and groom.” He lifted up a video still taken of their dance together, though in that particular shot, Jaejoong and Yunho didn't have their arms around each other. “The man in the photos with Gaeun was not, in fact, Jung Yunho. We are taking advantage of this opportunity to announce contrasting news: the man in the photograph is Son Gaeun's boyfriend and fiance Hwang Younghyun.”

The press erupted in gasps, and immediately turned their cameras to Gaeun, who was reaching out to grab her own mic. “It was not my intention to be dishonest to the people who've supported me,” she said solemnly. “But the man I've been seeing is a non-celebrity, and I respect his privacy and wishes to stay out of the spotlight. However, given the troubles we have caused Yunho ah by this misunderstanding, we've decided to publicly announce our engagement today. Please understand that I have no intentions of disrupting Starkiss as a group based on my decision. I am fully committed to my activities, and will continue on as leader of the group as I have since its founding. I only wish to have the opportunity to share my life with the man I love as I continue to grow as an artist, a wish he also shares. With that said, I would like to introduce you all to my fiance, Hwang Younghyun.”

Younghyun stepped out, and immediately cameras started flashing to catch him greeting his fiancee. He looked completely bewildered by all the excitement, and the photographers seemed a bit bewildered by him; other than Yunho's old hairstlye, they really looked very little alike. Jaejoong glanced over at the representative from Dispatch, who looked somewhat flustered at this revelation.

To save Younghyun the burden of addressing the press, Gaeun quickly took her mic again and began giving them a brief about her relationship with him-- dancing around just how long they'd actually been dating to spare any fans who would be troubled by her dating even when she was a rookie-- and again reiterating her commitment to the group. The Starkiss members also took their turns sharing their excitement and support for Gaeun, and then the stage was open for questions.

Most were directed towards Gaeun, asking her to divulge any early wedding plans and how the question was 'popped,' but a few were sent to Hyunsoo, asking him to elaborate on how the future of the group would change and why he'd kept the information a secret for so long. Some reporters seemed to suspect him of a media play in delaying the announcement, but he simply kept patient and said there were concerns over the official announcement given Younghyun's nature as a non-celebrity and that Starkiss had needed the time to discuss their future together. “Besides,” Hyunsoo nim said wryly, “from the pictures taken, I couldn't quite determine myself whether it was Yunho or not. I see now that I gave Yunho goon a rather troublesome hair style for their promotions, and we've corrected it now.” Some of the reporters laughed. “My decision may have troubled fans, and for that I am truly apologetic.”

Only one reporter addressed Yunho, jokingly asking him if he was broken hearted. Yunho simply smiled genially and said there was never a point when the rumors were true. “And I'll ask writers and readers to remember this next time our labelmates wear the same sponsored clothing as each other,” he added. “We'd all have complicated love lives if it were always true.”

The talk with Gaeun went on for some time before Hyunsoo nim finally steered the conversation towards B.P.M and gave Jongwoo the chance to talk about their solo stage and future plans to extend their international following. It struck Jaejoong that when the reporters addressed B.P.M, they no longer referred to C&M as a small label, as they had when DBSK were rookies. He supposed they weren't anymore, which gave him a sense of satisfaction. He glanced over at Yoochun wryly. To think you almost could have missed out on being a part of making this happen, if you'd taken your other offer.

When the conference finally wrapped up, Jaejoong was relieved to go backstage and finally relax. They were already tired from flying in from Japan, and Yunho's mood had only made him more anxious, so now that the weight was finally off his shoulders, he felt much better. Starkiss immediately flipped on their phones to see if any netizens were reacting yet to the Mnet stream of the conference and whether or not they were upset with Gaeun, and Changmin, Yoochun, and Junsu made a beeline for the snack table, since they hadn't eaten other than a few stale crackers on the flight home. B.P.M also made their way through, buzzing about how many cameras they'd gotten to appear in front of, but Jaejoong didn't see Yunho anywhere, which set off some alarms.

He wandered around backstage until he found Yunho sitting at the back entrance, rubbing his forehead. Jaejoong crouched down in front of him, looking at the worry lines on his face, still present even though everything he'd been worrying about was now over.

“Yunho,” Jaejoong said, trying to choose his words carefully. “What is it? I know you were bothered about the possibility of the conference not going well, but it was fine. I'm sure some fans will have one complaint or another, but most will just be relieved, just like hyungnim predicted. If something else is bothering you... would you please just tell me? I'm worried about you.”

“You'll be mad,” Yunho said, sighing. “Because I didn't do what you said.”

“If I'm going to be mad, let me be mad, but at least tell me so I don't have to be worried and mad.”

Yunho grabbed his phone and pulled up a few menus until he was opening up his recent text messages, then passed the phone to Jaejoong. Jaejoong read the name on the top of the screen, his umma's, than looked down at the message.

So because my own son won't talk to me, I have to hear his affairs from a press conference? You won't tell your own mother of your relationships, and make her look a fool in front of others? Well, if you won't speak to me, I'm coming to you. Your father and I will be in Seoul by tonight. We'll give you the time to rest from your flight, but you're coming to see us by tomorrow or we WILL interrupt whatever schedule you're on. And this time, you WILL tell us everything properly like the grateful son you SHOULD be. -Umma-

“See?” Yunho said, looking up at Jaejoong's face. “I knew you would be mad.”

Even if I love, nobody knows,
The footsteps that conceal you,
As you watch the curtain of tonight approach,
We want each other endlessly, crazily,
Without anybody knowing the liberation of one’s sigh

Even the satisfying fate,
Even the beautiful eternity,
It doesn’t matter to me anymore; you’re my everything,
Getting drawn intoyour mesmerizing eyes,
Without anybody knowing my daily life