DON'T WALK AWAY

There was absolutely nothing more torturous in life than waiting. Every time Yunho's cell phone went off, Jaejoong just about lept out of his skin, wondering if the agency was phoning him. He and Yunho had wrapped up their dance lessons and sent off Jaejoong's audition tape just a few days after he had secretly sent out Yunho's, but sometimes he forgot to worry after himself and his own chances at success with his footage. As badly as he wanted to pass the audition for himself, he didn't want to do it alone. His songs had always been important to him, but never had he loved them as much as he did when he performed them with Yunho for the first time. Becoming a performer would be a dream come true, but it would lose a lot of its meaning if the person who had strengthened his love for music-- his love for everything-- wouldn't be there with him.

"If hearing a ringtone freaks you out so much, I could switch my phone to silent," Yunho after three calls from Changmin came in during a single evening.

"NO!" Jaejoong practically yelled. "Don't do that!"

"...are you really that stressed about this? I'm sure the agency has plenty of tapes to go through before they do callbacks for live auditions, so you probably won't be hearing from them for awhile yet. And there's really no way you're not going to make it. The way you sang that song..." Yunho's lips curved into a smile. "I could have kissed you right then and there if I hadn't restrained myself."

Jaejoong ducked his head, trying to hide his pleased grin. "I'll try and be patient about it. But the summer is ending soon, and I would like to know..."

Yunho frowned, as he always did these days when he heard the words “summer” and “ending” used in the same sentence. “Just try to enjoy yourself,” he said solemnly. “I know you're anxious, but there's nothing you can do about it for now.”

Still, Jaejoong couldn't help sneaking a few texts out to Dayoung when he knew Yunho wasn't paying attention. She told him that the company was going through the current batch of tapes and meeting regularly about their thoughts and opinions, but she couldn't tell him about his tape or Yunho's without risking her job. Just wait a little bit longer, she texted back. They're taking the decision very seriously!

Being patient was easier said than done, but Yunho did make it a bit easier. With the summer winding down, Auntie Minjung lightened their work schedule to start phasing in her worker for the school year, a part time student from the local university. During their time off, Yunho would take him out often, sometimes back to the stream they'd gone to earlier in the summer, and other times on a more date-like outing for ice cream or to go to a summer festival. When Jaejoong pointed out that he was just as happy to stay in Yunho's room and sing together, particularly since they could only actually act like a couple when no one else was watching, Yunho reminded him that he hadn't gone out on a single date in his last relationship and he wanted to do things properly this time.

But even Yunho was starting to chafe against how restricted they were in the outside world. A little skinship was allowable, but it could never look too serious. They didn't hold hands or use any affectionate nicknames, and to everyone else, they looked like two best friends hanging out together. For the most part, being that way made Jaejoong feel safe, but sometimes he wanted to throw his reservations away and be open. I am now with the person I love, someone I never thought would ever think of me this way, and I should be able to hold his hands in front of all of you without you saying a word about it.

That night, rather than take him out to one of the town's few date spots, they went back out to the abandoned road together. Yunho rolled out a blanket over the truck bed and turned his boom box onto a ballad radio station as he pulled out the goodies he had stashed when they'd left: a bottle of champagne “borrowed” from Auntie Minjung, some fluted glasses, and two leftover slices of pie Jaejoong had made the night before.

Jaejoong filled their glasses and clinked them together. “Here's to a night that isn't hot enough to fry an egg,” he joked.

“And to the new moon.” The sky was dark but for the scattering of stars, which Jaejoong had never learned how to tell apart. If it were a drama, Yunho would be able to point them out perfectly, and just when they were focusing on the same point, a shooting star would sail across and everything would be fantastical and romantic, but for someone who skipped school regularly and had his head full of music, Jaejoong doubted Yunho knew them any better than he did.

The two of them tipped their glasses back and downed them. The champagne burned a little when it went down, but it didn't bother Jaejoong in the slightest. He liked how the warmth spread through his body, and it felt even better when Yunho grabbed onto his hand and held it in his. It was a bit breezy out, but he couldn't feel any of it with Yunho holding on to him.

“Just two more weeks,” Yunho said softly. “It's not fair. We should have had more time to spend together. I should have asked you out the moment I laid eyes on you.”

Jaejoong shook his head. “I still would have passed out.”

“...good point. And it's not like I believe in love at first sight, or anything. I believe in wanting someone to be in your life at first sight. And when I got that wish, that's when I could start falling in love with you.” He poured himself another glass of champagne. “But it still must have been fate or something, right? I mean, out of all the places you could have ended up when you ran away, it was here. Even the people who live around here forgot this place existed.”

“It was either fate or I just have a fortunate way of making wrong turns.”

“A fateful way of making wrong turns.” Yunho leaned down and kissed him, filling Jaejoong's mouth with the sharp and sweet taste of champagne all over again. It was dark out and there weren't any lights to see by on the emptied road, so he felt perfectly hidden and protected in Yunho's arms. Was this really fate? If he had never left his home and gotten hopelessly lost on his way to wherever he was going, would they still have been able to meet, or had he always been meant to leave on that exact day, a day when Yunho would be on that particular road a few hours early to be able to find him? Perhaps it was just a series of coincidences, and perhaps it wasn't. Jaejoong was thankful for it all the same, that their stars had aligned and they had been able to come together in spite of odds stacked against them.

Yunho pulled away slowly. “I have something for you,” he said. He pulled a small gift bag out of his pocket and emptied the contents out onto his hand. They were twin rings made from twisted bands of silver; not the overly expensive kind of jewelry from a dealer, but not cheaply made either. Jaejoong picked one up and turned it over in his hands.

“I got it from a vendor at the market with some of my work money,” Yunho said. “What do you think?”

“You're not proposing to me, are you?” Jaejoong said lamely, trying to hide how moved he was. He knew Yunho had almost met his savings goal for the new truck, and buying these rings must have subtracted a little bit from his funds. Their summer job was almost over, and even if they stopped taking time off, it wasn't going to be easy to earn it back quickly.

“I know it's kind of cheesy,” Yunho said quickly. “And you don't have to wear it if you really don't want to. But it's hard sometimes, you know? Because of the way we are, we can't always talk about being together, but when I see how some people look at you, I want to let them know that you already have someone you belong to. And when we're not together...if you look at it and think of me...”

Jaejoong pushed his finger over Yunho lips, silencing him. “Of course I'll take it,” he said. “I feel the same way.”

He lifted his hand and fitted it on his ring finger. Yunho grinned and placed his ring on his pinky. “Changmin says that if the same ring fits on your pinky that fits on your lover's ring finger, it means you're meant to be,” he said. “Not that I need a ring to tell me that.” He wound their hands together. “I just want to lock you here forever sometimes. But I know that isn't good for you, or for either of us, so I thought this would be a better way to help you bring me along with you... when you go.”

“You're imagination could stand to be a little better,” Jaejoong whispered, thinking of the audition tapes that were now back in his hometown, but before Yunho could ask what he meant, he raised his head up to kiss him thoroughly enough to halt any further attempts at a conversation. If there were any shooting stars lighting the sky overhead, they shut their eyes to them in their haste to feel each other, to know that they were in each other's hands now even though what came next wasn't certain.

0o0

Jaejoong was in the bathroom combing his hair a few days later when his phone rang. He glanced down at the screen. It wasn't his parents or sisters or even Junsu or Changmin or Yoochun. He didn't recognize the number, but he picked it up anyways, half-forgetting that he was expecting a call in the first place thanks to how ragged Yunho was running him in the name of enjoying their last weeks together.

“Good afternoon,” the clipped and businesslike male voice on the other line said. “Am I speaking to Kim Jaejoong?”

“You are.”

“Jaejoong-ssi. This is a representative from C&M Entertainment, calling in regards to your audition tape.”

Jaejoong almost dropped the phone into the sink. “O-oh, yes?”

“After reviewing your song and dance footage, we had a few questions for you before proceeding. Are you able to talk at the moment?”

“Yes, that will be no problem.” Quiet down, heart, I can't afford to mess this up!

“First of all, the song you performed in the tape... you have written on your application that this was an original number?”

“That's correct.”

“And which part did you write-- the lyrics, the melody...?”

“The lyrics. The backing track was worked out by someone else who auditioned to your company. Jung Yunho?”

Jaejoong heard papers rustling on the other end of the line. “And do you have any additional experience with songwriting?”

“Not professionally, but it's a hobby of mine. I have other songs, about fifteen or so, I think?”

“Is this your first time applying for an agency?”

“It is.”

“And you are seventeen, is that correct?”

“Yes.”

“You are also aware that the training period for new entrants can take several years? Should you be accepted into the company at your age, it will be difficult for you to attend school full time while also attending to your work with the agency. Do you understand this?”

“I do.” Jaejoong wasn't overly concerned about school. If he went to university at all, it would be for music, and his grades for his first three years of high school had been good. He could study well on his own, and he was a good test taker, so it wouldn't be too damaging if he fell behind a little bit.

“In that case, I would like to schedule you in for a formal audition with the company. Our management has expressed an interest in hearing more from you. It's not often we get applicants who show such promising songwriting ability, and we would appreciate you auditioning live for us and showcasing another one of your self-written songs.”

Jaejoong really had to struggle to keep his hands on the phone with how badly they were shaking. “I-I'll be in the area in a little over a week, will that be fine?”

After he had confirmed Jaejoong's audition date, the representative hung up, and Jaejoong sunk to the ground, trying to hold in a scream of excitement. I did it. After all that time, I'm finally a step closer.

Of course, he'd still have to go through a whole new audition, and it still wasn't guaranteed that he would make it. All the same, he felt more confident than he had before. They liked his music. They wanted to hear another song.

Taking a deep breath, Jaejoong picked himself off the ground and opened the bathroom door. Yunho was standing outside, looking perplexed. “Who were you talking to in there?” he asked.

“C&M Entertainment,” Jaejoong said, his voice still a little bit dazed.

“Did you...?”

“I was asked to come in for a formal audition.”

Yunho's face broke into a grin, and he wrapped his arms around Jaejoong. “Congratulations. I knew if anyone could do it, it would be you.”

While they were still hugging, Yunho's cell phone went off in his back pocket. Jaejoong drew away. “Go on, answer it,” he said.

“It can wait. Shouldn't we go to eat or something to celebrate?”

Jaejoong reached around and grabbed Yunho's phone, placing it in his hands. “Just answer it. We can celebrate later.”

Yunho shrugged and accepted the call. “Hello...yes, this is Yunho.”

Please, please let this be what I think it is. He waited to gauge Yunho's reaction, and sure enough, his eyes were soon widening and turning to Jaejoong in confusion.

“Ah- yes,” he was saying into the phone, looking completely upended. “No, no professional experience. Self-taught. Yes. That's correct...”

His conversation seemed to be going in the same direction Jaejoong's had, and when he finally heard signs of Yunho making an appointment with the representative, Jaejoong sighed in relief. Yunho was clearly shaken up by Jaejoong's unexpected surprise for him, but he was actually going through with it. Maybe it was because he hadn't properly thought it through, but once he was scheduled in, it would be impolite to change his mind.

When he finally hung up, Yunho stared at his phone blankly for a few seconds, then glanced over at Jaejoong. “Is there something you need to tell me?”

“Congrats?”

“Jae... seriously?”

Jaejoong shifted from foot to foot. “Fine. There is something I need to tell you. I don't want to do this if you're not here with me. And it's not just because I don't want to be separated or break up because we can't be together. It's because you deserve this opportunity as much as I do. I've seen you dance and heard you sing, and you should be on stage with me because my music only makes sense if what you bring to it is there.”

Yunho flushed. “It's good to hear you say that, Jae, but... really I've never danced for anybody but you before. What if I go up there and completely tank?”

“There's no way. When I watched you dance before, it was like something that came naturally to you. That doesn't change just because there's a few people watching. Besides, if you're going to give up for a reason as stupid as that, I'll have to take that to mean that you don't want to stay with me, and that it's better that we break up after all...”

Yunho grabbed his hand quickly. “No! We're not breaking up. I'll audition. I want to audition. I'm as freaked out as hell about the whole thing, but you're right. Being freaked out isn't a good reason to give up. I'll give it a shot, okay? But if my parents decide to cut me off, I'm blaming you.”

“That's fine,” Jaejoong said, sighing in relief. “And I'm sorry about going behind your back. You wouldn't have auditioned any other way.”

“Just don't make a habit of it. And about auditioning... say that we both make it in. Won't it be harder to have the kind of relationship we do, with both of us in the public eye? We'll have to keep it even more of a secret, and even if we'll be together on stage, we'll have to be apart in so many other ways.”

Jaejoong nodded. “I get that. But I'd rather have you there and hold back a little bit then go forward on my own. The music we made together isn't just my dream, it was yours, too. If there are challenges to face, we can at least face them together, right?”

Yunho smiled. “When you say it like that, it doesn't sound so bad. It'll also be good if I'm there to look after you, won't it? We'll be fine.”

“So you'll do this with me?”

“I'll give it my best if you do.” Yunho squeezed Jaejoong's hand. “We started this together. Let's see it through to the end.”

0o0

The next week, when Jaejoong had packed up his things to go back home, Yunho came with him. It wasn't the bittersweet parting between them they had thought it might be, but still Jaejoong felt sorry to leave Junsu, Yoochun, and Changmin behind. Junsu and Yoochun took it in stride, promising weekend visits up to Jaejoong's hometown when they were free, but Changmin was notably upset, not so much that they were leaving now, but that if both of them passed the audition, he wouldn't be seeing much of them anymore. Although he tried to hide it, Jaejoong could tell that he was attached to Yunho after knowing him so long, and was feeling a little bit abandoned at the thought of him pursuing another world outside of the one they had grown up together in. That, or he was just upset about losing Jaejoong's cooking skills for an indefinite amount of time.

Yunho stayed over at Jaejoong's house for the night before their formal audition. Jaejoong didn't say anything to his parents about Yunho being his boyfriend; they were only just beginning to process his uality in the first place, as well as the fact that he was trying for a career as a performer, and he didn't need to drop that bombshell on them just yet. Yunho remained kind and polite to them, which they appreciated, but Jaejoong doubted they suspected him of having romantic inclinations for their son-- who would ever guess, looking at Yunho, that he would? Even the perceptive Dayoung seemed oblivious, though her eyes did travel back and forth between the rings on their fingers when Jaejoong had introduced the two of them.

Their in-person auditions at C&M were nerve wracking, but fairly straightforward. Yunho was called in first, and when he came back, he reported that they'd had him perform a freestyle dance, and then had asked him for one final song to showcase his vocals and rap. There had been one other boy there with them, and he'd gone after Yunho, and then finally it was Jaejoong's turn. His palms were sweaty and his heart was racing, but he managed to safely deliver one of his latest compositions without mishap. The representatives at the table didn't show much in the way of a reaction, but continued to quiz him on his songwriting and singing experience until they finally let him go with the promise that he would hear back from them one way or the other within a few weeks.

Since school was on its way to starting, Yunho had to go back home not long after his audition. There wasn't a proper way to say goodbye in front of Jaejoong's family, so Yunho took Jaejoong along with him to the bus stop, and, when he was sure no one was looking, gave him a swift peck on the lips, promising to come back soon with something better whether they made it into C&M or not.

The next day, school began again. Life slowly went back to how it had been before he'd stumbled into Yunho's life, though nothing felt the same anymore. He still faced comments at school-- particularly from Junwoo, who had apparently ended up dumped when Seunghee found herself a richer boyfriend, and wasn't in the best of moods because of it-- but Jaejoong barely heard a single word anymore. He had someone who loved him now, a light at the end of his tunnel, someone sweet and strengthening he hadn't had before. He had friends who texted him during lunch break, asking him how he was doing and telling him stories about their own days. And he had his notebook still, and words to fill it. Take my hand, take my hand, leave the worries back at home. Follow a way, follow a way, the lonely you is no more.

During the first few days, he still felt a little bit empty. He used some of the courage he'd built up over the summer to start up tentative conversations with some of the other members of the school's choir, but he still missed the figures in his memories. The stifling hot summer market, the smell of fish, the creak of Yunho's truck, the snacks he would make for Changmin, Yoochun's ever-ready advice, Junsu's silly laugh, the cold waters of the pension's lake, Yunho's arms wrapped around his waist, his gentle kisses, his guitar chords, his dear and inexplicable love. He and Yunho called each other every night, but he missed being together. Even during the times when he and Yunho had been angry with or misunderstood each other, at least they had still be able to see each other and didn't have to wonder every minute what the other was doing and if they missed you as much as you missed them.

But at the same time, even that feeling of emptiness was special, and much better than the emptiness he had started with. Compared to living with only sadness and self hatred in his heart, having someone he loved to the point where not being able to see him was painful wasn't the worst thing he had suffered. Whenever his phone buzzed with new texts and voicemails, that slight emptiness filled and was replaced by happiness, and he knew in those moments that he really had been able to leave his loneliness behind.

He was on the school roof during lunch break, sitting in the very same spot where he'd written his first song, when his phone rang. He was expecting a call from Yunho, so he didn't look at the number when he picked up the call.

“Am I speaking to Kim Jaejoong?” a familiar voice said on the other line.

Jaejoong in his breath, held it for a moment, then released. “Yes,” he said. “You are.”

0o0

The concrete was hot against Jaejoong's feet as he waited at the bus stop. He'd gotten himself better shoes, but the lingering summer heat was trying hard to scorch through these as well. He'd brought a water bottle with him this time, though; no heatstroke was going to best him before the bus pulled up to the curb and emptied out its passengers.

He waited for a few more minutes before the bus finally turned the corner. He could see a face pressed up against the window, and grinned when their eyes met. It had only been a few weeks, but it felt like ages since he'd last seen him. A hungry feeling accumulated in the pit of his belly. It's too bad my family will be around, because I really feel like I could let you devour me right here, right now.

The bus doors opened slowly, much too slowly, and Yunho stepped out. They just stared at each other for a few seconds, consuming with their eyes what they couldn't with their lips and hands with the bus still puttering at the corner, waiting for a few stragglers to make their way out. The sight of him was as perfect as Jaejoong remembered, better maybe, and he wanted to fill his mind with it, as well as the excitement rushing through his veins.

“So,” Yunho said, clearing his throat. “A talent agency trainee, huh?”

“You, too. But not until we sign the contract.”

“But if you think about it, I'm in the presence of a future celebrity right now.”

“Is it such a big deal if you're going to be one, too?”

“It's a big deal because I'm happy to see you no matter what you are and what I am right now.” Yunho grabbed Jaejoong's hand, and suddenly they were running together to the small wooded area in Jaejoong's neighborhood. Without wasting any time, Yunho pushed him up against the trunk of the nearest tree and leaned in.

“People still might be able to see us,” Jaejoong whispered, though he was beyond caring at that point.

“Let them,” Yunho said, grabbing his waist and pulling him into a long and demanding kiss. I missed you, I missed you, I missed you so much.

Jaejoong broke away to take a breath. “I guess that's one of the benefits of not being trainees just yet. Even if someone sees, it's not news or a scandal or anything.”

“Oh, I'm in the mood for a scandal right now,” Yunho murmured, kissing him again. “We could get it out of our system now when we won't get in trouble for it.”

“In the woods?”

“Anywhere, if it's with you. But I guess we still have one other dream to think of.” He jerked his thumb back to the guitar case slung over his back. “Did you write any more songs?”

“Don't I always?”

“Then when we get back, can we play together again?”

“Of course. Speaking of which...” Jaejoong glanced at his watch. “We really should be going over to the agency about those contracts. Our appointment is coming up.”

“Just one more kiss, then,” Yunho said. “Our last kiss as two regular guys who no one else in the world cares about.”

“It's not like everyone is suddenly going to know who we are when we're just trainees.”

“Still. It's the beginning. And also an end, kind of.” Without saying anything else, he cupped Jaejoong's face and kissed him again, lingering as if he couldn't bear to part from their symbolic “last kiss.”

“From here on out, things are going to be different,” he whispered, linking his pinky with Jaejoong's ring finger so their jewelry clinked together. “But I'll stay by your side for as long as you want me right here. Deal?”

“Deal,” Jaejoong whispered back. “Even if it means I'll always want you?”

“Especially then.” Yunho wove their remaining fingers together and pulled Jaejoong forward. “Now let's get started on that other dream of ours, shall we?”

-Part One End- 

A/N: Yay, Part One is over! The boys have leveled up in their ambitions and it's on to round two! Thanks sooooooo much for everyone who has read so far and shared their thoughts, I love you all :D I hope you continue to support!

Don’t be afraid
Just stay still, I will run
To the shining place where we were together
Take my hand, take my hand
Leave the worries back at home
Follow a way, follow a way
The lonely you is no more
Baby, it’s time to get away
Even when the sun comes up, tonight continues
Give me one last kiss, close my eyes yeah
Come follow me, follow me so this love can resound
I’ll never, never let you go
Come follow me, follow me I will show you heaven