DOUBLE UPDATE ! Make sure to read chapter 15 before reading this if you didnt bookmarked 

I hug myself when the cold wind gently hit my body.

The sound of wave crashing sounds so beautiful and is the only sound that I could hear right now. I closed my eyes and take a deep breath of morning air by the sea. When I open them back, I could see the breathtaking view of the sea from the not-so-high-hill and smiles. The birds looks so happy when they flying around with their friends and families in the sky. They looks so free and happy- I wish I can too.

Its been a while since I have my own space and time. I cant deny that I am happy to be here all by myself- with this new life. Maybe it just me but I think I need to be away from them for a while.. because it seems like its hard for me to come home and faced them. I wonder if they are still searching for me after I disappeared without any news, and all I left was just a crashed car by that big tree. 

Did they thought that I.. already died ?

If so, Im glad they did. I want to died in the first place anyway, and I feels like it. Its like I already leave my body and now, my soul is standing on the hill with the wind around me. I dont want to be awake, let it stay like this for a long while. Maybe one day I can find the reason for me to stay awake- but for now, let it stay like this. I want to know how it feels to be dead so that I can find the reason to be alive. Alive and awake.

The crashing sound of the wave getting louder, or is it just my thought. Sometimes I wonder, why am I doing this when I can just faced everything ahead of me, but then I realised that I am not strong enough to faced it all by myself. I used to have someone to seek help from but how can I do that when they are the source to my problem ?

I sighed and slowly turned around, my eyes fall on a pair of feet infront of me. He is standing about 3 metres away from me, next to a shady tree that is the only tree lived on this hill. "You really thought Im going to commit suicide, dont you ?" I asked and see his smirk slowly appeared on his face. "Why are you thinking that way ?" He crosses his hands over his chest and sighed. "This is my place, I can do whatever I want to" he leaned his body on the tree and turned his head toward the sky. I follow his gaze and stared at the clear blue sky. 

It always have been beautiful around here- I changed my gaze back to him and blinked my eyes once -and he is one of the beautiful creature here. I think I am being delusional because he look weirdly familiar, and his voice- its like I have heard it somewhere before but I cant seem find it anywhere in my head. I take my steps to him and leaned on the tree next to him. 

"You always follow me around, I know you still thinking that Im going to-" "You was not like this" he cut my words. "I find you happy and cheerful back then" he said as he turned his head to me "Where did she go ?"

I blinked my eyes with no emotion written on my face. She died. I want to say it but he might follow me around again after this, thinking I am going to kill myself, so I just shut my mouth off. "I know how it feels like, trust me" he said. I turned my body around and is about to leave when he stopped me, "But you cant do this.. you know what I am trying to say right ?" Sounds of worried can be heard. I frowned, why is he being like this ? "I was in your shoes before, I want to run and never come back to my life. Remember 10 years ago ?"

10 years ago ?

"The school rooftop in Incheon. Remember that school's freak who everyone scared and annoyed of ?" he asked and my eyes slowly widened when it hit me. "There is a day when Im trying to jump off the building and all I need was just another step and in a split second- you saved me" 

He is that freak. He is Choi Seungcheol.*

"You innocently said that there is still many fun things we havent faced yet, and because of that cheerful girl- my lifes re-written" he said and the next thing I know is he already stands infront of me. "You dont know how thankful I am to you." I look at him and search for his eyes but they are slightly hidden