AN: So….Jessica was kicked out by SM and… I’m very devastated by that fact… I mean… I love her so so much that I couldn’t think about not be able to see her smile again… I don’t know…. My emotion got over me and I start to blame the other members for not defending her and I read some comment from fans…more likely ‘so called sones’ they were blaming Sica for leaving…they say if it’s not because of her business and her relationship with Tyler Kwon SNSD will still be as 9… Man… how about Taeng and Beakhyun? Some of you probably cursing Beakhyun and Taeyeon for hurting your feeling as a fan when they release the statement that they are dating… but then all of you go ‘Bless the BaekTae couple’ but when it’s about Jessica you blame her like it’s 100% her fault? Get your head together (Only apply to those who left hateful comments on any kpop pages regarding Jessica’s case). I’m sad seeing some sones say bad thing about her… and what hurt me the most is… JYJ left DBSK, SM didn’t kick them out, Hangeng left Suju…SM didn’t kick him out…Kris left EXO and it wasn’t SM that kicked him out…it were their decision to leave but Sica didn’t intend to leave…she even came back on 29 in order to join the member at the fanmeeting… How… How can some haters say she left SNSD? Aaah… I wrote this story… well base on my feelings… What would I do if I’m in Jessica position I thought? Read at your own risk people I know the truth is not yet reveal if they members were force or manipulated by SM to do such thing to Sica or otherwise… I don’t intend any misunderstanding… I love SNSD… as 9 not 8… I will still try to hang on and support them but not as much as I do when Sica was still a member… Sica cold’s demeanour that attract me to SNSD… I’m not saying there’s no point for me to support SNSD now that she’s not part of them, I will still support them… but right now I think Jessica Jung Sooyeon need more support from us than the other 8… they got each other while Sica is alone… I’m sorry if I offended any sones… please forgive me… just… I can’t think properly this few days… I was a fan of Ladies Code especially Rise (R.I.P Eunbi and Rise I love you girls….)…after the incident I tried to hang on to Kpop world and now… this… my heart stopped once when I found out about LC…and Jessica’s case just make my heartache worst… okay enough with the sad note and stuff… let’s move to the story I shall call this story as ‘The sinking of TAENGSIC ship’

‘This…what’s the meaning of this?!’ Jessica looked at her manager with teary eyes, she just came back from NY, still having jetlag and there it is, her manager telling her that SM is firing her from SNSD.

‘You can read don’t you?’ the manager chided.

Jessica feels like her life is being out from her body, firing her from SNSD, after all that she sacrifice for the group and this is how it ends she thought.

‘But…but why?’ she regain her consciousness and look at her manager eyes pleading for the truth behind her dismissal from the group.

‘Jessica…you know the reason and yet you still asked? The members agree to it so there’s nothing we can do…however you should be grateful that SM still allow you to continue your solo activity until your contract end.’

‘No…No! Drive me to Taeyeon’s place now!!’ she demands.

‘But Jessica…you…’

‘She’s the leader and she can tell me why they agree to this!! I need to know why!!’ Jessica cuts her manager off and forces him to take her to Taeyeon.

Upon reaching Taeyeon’s place

‘Kim Taeyeon!!’ Jessica shouts for her teammate’s name or should she call her as her ex-teammate from now on while pressing on the doorbell.

‘What do you want?’ Taeyeon asked in monotonous tone upon opening the door.

‘What is this Tae? Why why did you agree to dispel me too?’

‘All the members agree you know?’

‘You could say no you know? I thought we promised to stay together as a group even after we got marry and become granny? I thought you guys will back me up if SM did this? I thought…’

‘You thought we would allow you to tarnish the SNSD name with your business?’

‘What?’ Jessica was confuses with Taeyeon’s statement.

‘Sica…your business…it’s affecting our activity as a group…and you spend too much time with Tyler… SM think if you continue being stubborn and continue with your activity it is better to dismiss you from the group… and you never took SNSD’s activity seriously after you being to attach to him…you’re hurting to other members feeling…’

‘but…’

‘If you are marrying him it’s fine but don’t take your personal affair into the group okay?’ Taeyeon cuts her off.

Jessica clenches her fist while trying to hold her tears ‘What about you?’

‘Pardon?’

‘You and Beakhyun… you know that the fans will get mad over it and still…you keep hinted them…and didn’t your scandal affecting our group too? As well as EXO? Huh?? And FYI Taeyeon…if you said that I don’t care about the group and been neglecting the group activity I won’t be here today… and Tyler he is my business partner and also my close friend… he’s everywhere I am because he wanted to show me his support… I was hoping for you guys to support me when my brand launched…but you didn’t even came Taeyeon!!’

Taeyeon remain silent.

Jessica couldn’t hold in her tears anymore and she let a loud cry ‘I came back because I know we have fanmeeting tomorrow, I came back…and you say I don’t take SNSD serious?’

Taeyeon raise her hand to pat Jessica on the shoulder but she stop halfway and she pull it back ‘Didn’t you say you wanna halt your activity as a SNSD member? And you spend more time in trying to design your BLANC instead of focusing on SNSD…even if you denying the rumour about you and Tyler…but he is everywhere where you are…people won’t stop talking Sica… the company decision is final…I’m sorry I can’t help you…’

‘Whose fault do you think it is then?!’

‘Sica?’ Taeyeon was shocked by Jessica’s sudden outburst.

‘If you could just tell me that you and Beakhyun are dating…if you could just tell me that you are never interested in me I would not seeing him!! You toss me aside like I’m a ragged doll…the doll that you already bored with… for years I tried to get your attention but you never look at me! I launch BLANC because I want to get your attention Taeyeon… so that for once you will talk about me in the public… or mention me in your Instagram or whatsoever… but that moment never came… why?! Why?! And despite the fight we had a few weeks ago regarding my decision to continue with my business and also as a SNSD member…I thought you will stand there for me Taeyeon… I thought you will stand up and told the members ‘Enough! Let Jessica do what her heart desire…’ I was waiting for you to say those words but you just keep silence while Tiffany arguing on how SNSD is way more important than chasing my own dream?’

Taeyeon heartache seeing Jessica’s state, she wanted to pull the latter into her embrace but she restrain herself from doing so because once she let loose she would broke  her promise with someone.

Jessica waited for Taeyeon’s reply but there is no reply from her. Jessica smiles a bit, though it was actually a painful smile, she looks Taeyeon in her eyes and whispers something that Taeyeon couldn’t grasps on.

Jessica turns and head back to her manager’s car. Taeyeon hearts screaming for her to stop Jessica from going but her feet just couldn’t move. They are stuck on the ground like there’s invisible super glue gluing her to the ground.

In the car

‘So?’

‘…if this what SM wants then bring it on…’ Jessica said softly.

‘I’m sorry Jessica…maybe I will have to resign from being your manager too…’

‘…’ Jessica glare at her manager through the rear mirror before she sighed and nodded.

She just too tired to open , she is tired from the jetlag, from the news of her dismissal from SNSD and she is tired from all of SM’s play.

‘I should have left when I had the chance…’ she thought to herself ‘No…I should have backed Kris up when he was suing SM…’ she thought before let go a long sigh and fidgeted herself at the backseat.

In Taeyeon’s house

‘Nuna…you shouldn’t be so harsh on Jessica nuna…’ a young boy step out from the shadow.

‘Did you hear all that Beakhyun?’ Taeyeon questioned.

‘En…’ Beakhyun nodded.

Taeyeon turns and smiles at him painfully ‘I can’t do anything Beak ah…I wanted to hold her so much but I can’t…I just can’t…’

Beakhyun took a step closer and pull Taeyeon in his embrace.

‘You tried your best didn’t you nuna? It’s not your fault…’

‘It is my fault!! I tried to forget her by going out with you…I force myself to love you… but my heart just couldn’t…I’m sorry I was using you Beak ah!’ Taeyeon cried on the younger boy’s shoulder.

Beakhyun caress his girlfriend’s hair as he holds her in his arms ‘I don’t mind at all nuna…’

Taeyeon tilted her head to look at him ‘Beak…hyun?’

‘Because I love you even if you don’t love me…that is enough for me.’ He smiles at her.

The guilt in Taeyeon tighten, how can she used this young boy for her own selfishness she thought.

It was a bittersweet relationship they are having.

SNSD meeting before the Fanmeeting

‘I’m going to defend Sica at all cost!!’ Yoona cried out.

‘Don’t be an idiot Yoona!! You know SM will kick you out too if you do that!!’ Sooyoung retorted.

‘But the fans deserve to know…’ Seohyun said quietly afraid that the unnies heard her and scold her for saying such thing.

‘Kim Taeyeon what are you going to do?! Are you going to keep silence even at the fanmeeting?!’ Hyoyeon grab Taeyeon by the collar and yell at her.

Taeyeon keeps her composes and looks away.

‘You shouldn’t ask Sica to choose Fany! I know you love SNSD so much but asking Sica to do so is unfair to her!’ Yuri turns her gaze from Hyoyeon to Tiffany who sits comfortably next to Taeyeon.

‘You girls backed me up too when I mentioned it to her!’ Tiffany replies.

‘Well yeah we did because she really did spend too much time with Tyler and BLANC but we didn’t know the management would take such a drastic movement in removing her from the group!’ Sunny retorted.

‘What have been done is done… we can’t take back what we’ve said to her and nor we can undo what the management has decided… from now on we are 8…’ Taeyeon finally spoke up.

‘It just doesn’t seems right without Sica unnie…’ Yoona tried to whole in her tears as she blurted out the words.

‘I feel bad for saying all those horrible things to Sica! I wish I was there for her right now!!’ Sooyoung cried out.

‘I agree… we all should be with Jessica instead of the fans right now…she needs more support than we are…’ Sunny agrees to Sooyoung’s word.

‘So what you wanna do now Sunkyu? Go back to Korea and abandon all those fans who came to see us?!’ a manager scold the petite girl when he heard everything that she had said.

‘If you guys don’t want SNSD to break up you better just put on façade and go out there entertain the fans!! Just let Jessica become SNSD scapegoat, rather than the whole SNSD being dismissed!’ the manager chided before he went to the refreshment area to get a drink.

All of the members feel bad as they have betrayed their sister though it was not entirely her fault. Taeyeon feels guiltier when she heard what the manager had said, a few months ago, after her scandal being expose she was threatened by the CEO to end SNSD career but she couldn’t agree to it.

Flashback

‘Do you know how much your scandal has affect EXO popularity? Especially Beakhyun?’

‘I’m sorry Mr. CEO…’

‘Because of your recklessness SNSD also losing quite a number of fans…’

‘I’m very sorry…’

‘How about I dismissed SNSD?’

‘What?! No!! Sones needs us!!’ Taeyeon protests despite being shocked by the suggestion.

‘…hmm…but I don’t need you girls anymore…I have EXO that can bring me millions of sales, and red velvet that is fresher than SNSD…’

‘In spite of all that, SNSD has its own charm! You can’t dismiss us!’

‘Then…if you agree to help me in getting rid of Jessica I will not dismiss SNSD as whole…how about that?’

‘….Jessica? But….why?’

‘Well…you know about her rumour about Tyler Kwon don’t you? And she’s opening her own business too… it gonna be a threat to us…’

‘Is it wrong for her to do what she wants to do?!’

‘Ara…Taeyeon shi…you want me to destroy SNSD don’t you or better yet…expose that you actually putting a façade while dating Beakhyun because the person you love is not him but Jessica?’

‘No…please don’t….’

The CEO smirk evilly before he open his mouth ‘Just do as I say…and I promise you I will keep SNSD as long as you want it to be…’

End of flashback

Taeyeon sigh painfully ‘I’m sorry Jessica…’

Jessica’s departure is because Taeyeon couldn’t say no to the CEO. It’s because she isn’t strong enough to stand for her. It’s because she loves her too much she agree to stay away from her when they CEO found out that she is actually in love with Jessica. It’s because she used Beakhyun in order to break Jessica’s undying desire for her. It was all her fault in the beginning, she didn’t tell anyone even the members because she was afraid how they would react and how they would think of her. She kept it all to herself, she doesn’t want anyone to be hurt by her action. If only she could be true to her feelings and fight for Jessica…maybe just maybe…SNSD could stay as 9.

A:N D: D: I'm thinking of ending all the unfinished story ASAP!! I will I promise this time I won't procrastinate again!! If this story is offending please ignore...what is your thought about SM decision in kicking Sica out? Devastating for me!! I really feel like dying!! I haven't seen Jessica in flesh yet!! Only seeing her on TV or youtube but never the real person!! D: SM YOU ARE SO CRUEL!!! CRUEL!!