I Understand

~Sungmin POV~

Damn it. I have been stuck here in Seoul since I tried to catch up to Kyuhyun for another three days. And now, Kyuhyun had probably already left for China! Not only that, but the members have been on edge even more since Kyuhyun went MIA. My little outburst has helped them a bit, but their worry for our maknae has just increased the tension.

And I’ve been trying to get away, but Leeteuk-hyung is suspicious. It started when he had to drive an hour to pick me up, considering I was on my way to Gangwon-do. He continued asking me questions as to why I had driven so far to find Kyuhyun, especially when I had supposedly known that Kyuhyun was just going to the store and I was nowhere near the store. He’s been keeping an extra sharp eye on me since then. Well, he’s been keeping an extra sharp eye on everyone, making sure nobody picked up and left like Kyu, but he’s been extra careful with me...

And the worst part was that I was already packed up and ready to go (with a full tank of gas, mind you). I had a backpack with all the necessities stored in the trunk of my car and I had all the flight times to Beijing. Now, I just need a chance to get away and get a ticket...

And now was the perfect time to do that. It was 1 AM, Leeteuk-hyung was at Sukira with Eunhyuk-ah while Shindong-hyung was at his own radio program. The rest of the members were asleep or in their dorm upstairs. I grabbed my wallet and keys off the kitchen table and shut the lights off, tip toeing to the door. However, before I got there, it opened.

“Sungmin-ah!” Leeteuk exclaimed, turning the lights on. I quickly shoved my keys in my pocket and smiled.

“Oh, Hyung,” I said, “You’re back early.”

Leeteuk shut the door and took his shoes off, “Yeah, I wasn’t feeling well, so Shindong took over for me with Eunhyuk. What are you still doing up?”

I shrugged, “Surfing the net. If you don’t feel well, you should go to bed, Hyung. Get some rest.” Please go back to your dorm upstairs...

Leeteuk smiled, “Yeah, I think I will. Do you mind if I sleep here tonight? Heechul and Donghae are still awake upstairs, and you know how loud they can be...”

I forced myself to smile, “Sure, Hyung.”

“Thanks, Sungmin-ah,” Leeteuk said, walking past me. He stopped to grab my shoulder though, “I’ll sleep with you tonight, do you mind?”

“Not at all, Hyung.” Leeteuk patted my shoulder before heading to our room. Once I heard the door close I slumped my shoulders. So much for leaving tonight...

~Kyuhyun POV~

“So, we made it to China,” Kibum said as we entered our hotel room, “Now what?”

“Well, we need to figure out how to get to Hankyung-hyung,” I replied, dropping my backpack onto the bed on the left while Kibum took the one on the right.

“Do we even know where he is now?” Kibum asked.

“Uh, Beijing?” I said, rolling my eyes.

“Duh. I mean his schedules. Will he be at the recording studio, dance rehearsal, MV shooting, drama shooting...who knows what Hyung is up to these days.”

“He doesn’t contact you either?”

“...Once. But we both got in trouble for it,” Kibum replied, sighing, “He’s really in deep trouble with SM.”

“I know,” I sighed, “But, we need him back...”

“I understand. I know we need him back. One album, that’s it, but...”

“But what if SM doesn’t allow it?” I finished for him. Kibum nodded and I collapsed back on the bed, covering my face with my hands. I hadn’t thought of that until now. I mean, this lawsuit between SM and Hankyung is a huge deal to them. SM is angry at Hankyung-hyung for suing and causing their stocks to drop, while Hankyung-hyung is angry at SM for not treating him properly. Honestly, I want Hyung to be happy, but Super Junior needs him...

“I mean, SM doesn’t want Hankyung-hyung to leave, that’s for sure,” Kibum said, unpacking his things, “But with all the grief he’s caused the company, would they let him back in that easily? Especially because wouldn’t it make them look a little, I don’t know...desperate?”

I nodded, “Well, let’s just focus on getting to Hankyung-hyung and speaking to him. Nobody’s recognized us so far, so let’s try to keep it that way. We don’t want the Hyungs to find out where we are, because that will only mean trouble...”

“Speaking of,” Kibum said, “Haven’t they tried calling you at all? I’m surprised your phone hasn’t been ringing off the hook...”

I sat up, surprised, “Actually, it’s been off. It died while I was driving to Gangwon-do...”

“Well go charge it up and see if they’re looking for you,” Kibum said. He then threw something at me, and I barely caught it. It was a bunch of wires?

“You have a Blackberry, right?” he asked, rolling his eyes. I looked at the wires again and saw it was a phone charger.

“Thanks, Hyung,” Kibum smiled and I ran to my backpack and took my phone out. I plugged it in and the screen came to life. After waiting a few minutes for it to turn on, I was surprised when I saw the number of missed calls, voicemails, and text messages that I had.

“Whoa,” I murmured, amazed. I felt Kibum look at it from behind me and he chuckled.

“They care much more for you than you think they do,” he muttered, patting my shoulder. I smiled slightly as I went through the messages. They even contacted my parents and sister, trying to find me. Overall, I had over 300 missed calls, 100 voicemails, and 437 text messages within the past four days, all from the members, my parents, my sister, friends, and even Manager-hyung.

‘Kyu! Where are you?’

‘Kyuhyun-ah! Why aren’t you answering you’re phone?’

‘Yah! Maknae! Get your back to the dorm now!’

‘Kyuhyun, this isn’t funny! Come back home!’

‘Kyuhyun, are you alright?’

‘Please come back...’

I felt tears spring to my eyes as I read each text message and listened to each voicemail from them. My parents sounded worried and my sister was even crying hysterically by the end of her last voicemail. All of the messages had the same message...come back home.

~Kibum POV~

I watched him go through his messages, on the verge of crying. He really didn’t know how much Super Junior cared for him. He was their maknae, of course they cared! But...I could see he was surprised...

Were things really this bad? That Kyuhyun didn’t even think that they cared about him anymore? That he really believed they wouldn’t care if he left and never came back? What has been going on since I left?

I looked at my phone and saw the messages that I had gotten while on the plane. They were also from the members, asking if I had seen Kyuhyun or knew where he was. I responded to Leeteuk-hyung, saying I had no idea. I know, I shouldn’t lie to them...but this is for their own good. Kyuhyun needs to do this, he needs to regroup Super Junior. And I’ll help him. After all, I was once the maknae...I know what it’s like to see your hyungs fight...

Back when we first debuted, when Super Junior was just a project group, fighting would be constant. Kyuhyun wasn’t there, he hadn’t joined the group yet. Kyuhyun only knew Super Junior...not SuperJunior05. Even if the members were the same, there was a huge difference between the two groups.

The beginning was great. We were young, inexperienced, and just having fun. We never thought it could end. And then, we realized...we would only last for a year. We started fighting over who left and who would stay. Who would make a good leader and who would be cut out. Who would have to say goodbye to the group that had become his second family.

The tension was high back then. Each and every one of us didn’t want to leave Super Junior. We didn’t want to “branch out”, as Lee Sooman had said we would. We wanted to stay Super Junior forever, and we would knock anyone down in order to keep that dream alive...including each other. And me, being the maknae back then, it was hard. It really opened my eyes to the world of entertainment...

And seeing Kyuhyun like this, it brought back all of those memories. The fights, screaming, yelling, broken items, crying...everything. I can look back on my life and easily say that that time was the hardest for me, especially being the maknae. I wanted to fix everything and everyone. I wanted to keep our family together. And Kyuhyun wants to do the same thing.

I’ll help you, Kyu...I know what’s it like in this position. It isn’t fun. I understand more than you think...