A/N: Which makes a better OST for this ch, XIA's Kkot or Kris' The End? I like them both for this ch. I guess they represent SeTao individually.

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Sehun noticed the tension brewing at the end of the table. Coincidentally they had somehow ended up sitting opposite each other. They glared at their plates silently, tossing food around pretending to be engaged with the atmosphere, as if they weren’t calling dark clouds to rain on the parade.

Indeed a dense storm was piling its way into his home upon the arrival of the Kim family, and their guest Tao. And it hit like lightening, simultaneously causing forks to fall, when his mother began to utter the most ridiculous sequence of words.

For Asian mothers the world began and ended with the term ‘marriage.’ In this case, it was Seryung’s marriage. Now that Sehun was attached there was only one child left to pair. He could feel the edge of the table implode upon her words. However she was unaware that both Tao and Seryung had completely given up with dinner. Hana too was unsettled, and Sehun himself felt perturbed.

Why were they in such a hurry to give away their kids? Sehun would never know. What he did know was that his name had been dragged into the conversation. He wished he could argue but there was no doubt that he and Hana were happy. Consequently, this was reason enough to move onto their daughter.

Then came shelling. A heavy bomb was dropped in the name of ‘Seo Kangjun.’ It was about here that Sehun no longer found his dinner appealing. His sister must have been crazy, he decided. She began to talk about Seo Kangjun in fond words. Had Tao not been there Sehun wondered if she would still take the time to select her wordings.

Sehun felt ill. Tao wasn’t looking so well either, the boy had paled and Hana smiled politely through her cringe. Even then, Seryung  obliviously continued to hit them with drones.

He wanted to smack her. If she were near enough, and had there not been guests, he might have done so sneakily, but it was unfortunate. He wanted to know where this sudden interest in Kangjun had stemmed from. Last he’d heard she was madly in love with Tao. So what was this? Had she and Tao fought? He grimaced upon realizing that that must have been it. Even if they had argued he found this behavior to be inappropriate. What had Tao done to her, for her to state that ‘Seo Kangjun had proposed to her?’ He couldn’t recall when the two had started dating. Were they at such a level now? Already?

Tao paled further until he was no longer white, but a sickly translucent green. He didn’t want to be at this dinner party anymore. Why had he even come? What kind of push-and-pull technique was his head playing at? He didn’t like what was happening to him. Externally, he was being threatened and the possibility of being stalked was also high. Internally, there was a war going on because of her. He needed it to stop so he could breathe. He missed air. Currently he was suffocating without reason. It was unimaginable.

At times he wanted to hold her, and at some moments she repelled him. What kind of logic was that? It wasn’t systematic at all. His heuristics were contaminated.

What did her marriage have to do with him? Why didn’t he want to hear about it? What connection did he have with her? And more importantly how could he erase it, as if it’d never happened? Was there an ‘off’ switch to love?

Tao hated her at that moment. He was glad to get away when dinner was ‘concluded.’ He left to get that air he so desperately longed for. His only solace was the balcony. He grinned dementedly, finally left to himself he was allowed to think. Or at least try to. His reasoning was still infected with boils and burns. It was slowly eating away at him.

He clutched the railing tightly and exhaled trying to find peace. The same peace that he’d been trying to reach for the past few days. It really felt like dying. He was dead but alive; a zombie. However there was nothing he could do about it. He was just existing without reason like a dummy.

He shut his eyes tightly wanting to scream his lungs out until they exploded. But he couldn’t. He wasn’t that mad! Or at least, not insane enough to alert everyone of his state. Normal, he was still some what balanced.

Clenching his teeth, he longed to feel something that wasn’t agony. The lies in his head were refusing to hide the truth. Nobody could help him. Even if he reached out no one could hear him. Like this, the negativity in him increased leaving an invisible layer of torture to blanket his form.

He wanted to die.

Tao gasped. A chilling thought crossed his head. What if he sold his soul to the devil? If he were to jump off the balcony would he find eternal rest? The notion became inviting. It calmed his raging heart for a second. The more he thought about it the more appealing it became. The idea of ceasing existence held out its hand to him. He thought of accepting that summon. The dread holding him down wavered when he thought of death.

He was about to climb when:

“It won’t make you happy.”

At first he imagined he was hearing things. He placed his raised leg back to the ground. When he whisked around there was nothing there. He could have sworn he’d heard a voice. Perhaps a mirage?

Ignoring it, he turned his attention back to his task of desire. It came again though:

“It will be worse than living.”

This time he jumped knowing this voice was not from his head. He’d definitely heard a childish voice. Although he couldn’t see her, he felt a presence. It made his pupils shake. Just what was it? Forgetting his burden he concentrated on this strange phenomena.

“You can hear me. Right?”

Tao didn’t reply. Talking to air was a sign that he was unhinged. He felt that way, but he didn’t dare admit it incase his words cemented into the truth.

“Nod if you can hear me.”

He massaged his temples. This was wrong. All rational told him he was growing delusional. Maybe this was a sign that he should end things?

He whipped to face the edge and took a deep breath of determination. He wanted to keep some dignity. What was this girly voice doing intervening with his brain waves?

He gripped the railing again and flung a leg over. Acrophobia was something he didn’t suffer from, however at that moment he felt afraid. The distance to the ground increased in magnitude. His breath shortened and he felt quesy.

“She’ll blame herself for it.”

Random sentences were trying to pull him back. He didn’t want to be swayed. He pulled his remaining leg over to swing beside its partner. Now he was sitting on the rail. The only thing left was a little push. He prepared himself.

“She’ll die because of you.”

He shut his eyes not wanting to think about it. She didn’t care about him. She would get married. He would be revealed for the liar that he was. Things would spiral out of control. There was no one at his side.

The girly tone didn’t leave him alone, “She will die, soon. I’ll make sure of it.”

His eyes snapped open only to narrow in anger. He stopped his morbid act because a reason to delay it had appeared, metaphorically speaking.

“What are you?” He spat intimidatingly. His eyes wandered the vicinity but nothing greeted them.

“Die after you save her.”

Tao tried to follow his ears, but he was left blind next to the supernatural being. He couldn’t see her of course. It was extraordinary for both of them. It was odd to have someone perceive her like this. For him, it was shocking to start hearing things out of the blue.

Mi Young didn’t answer his calls after that. She simply observed him. The depressed fellow was trying to seek comfort the wrong way. She knew it all too well, death was not the answer. His problems were something she was unaware of, and she was highly dubious that he would share his thoughts with her. eyes were hunting for her, they made her smirk because he was hopeless. He would never find her, and even if he did there was nothing he could do against her.

A fight was not what she wanted. She’d achieved what she’d come to do. Perhaps he would think she was a conscience later on. The ghost left him while he was still searching for her.

“You’re here?”

Tao froze. For a brief moment he could have sworn the wind stopped too, why was she here? He dared to look at her. She was the single cause of his self-torment, everything came back to her. She was Oh Seryung.

He itched to snap at her, but was terrified that she would really leave him by himself to battle his inner demons. Her eyes spoke for her, they were frightened. They lay in wait for harsh words to come their way, ones that would force her away. That wasn’t what he wanted right now. Right now, he wanted to console them.

She came to stand beside him keeping a safe distance. It made him scoff, she acted as if they were strangers rather than estranged lovers, as he imagined.

“I heard you were sick.”

He inhaled when her eyes turned to his without warning. They were swimming with concern. He hated it.

“I’m not,” he answered aloofly dipping his hands into his pockets casually breaking her gaze, as if it didn’t take every fiber of his being to do so. He had long become an actor. Lying was easy.

“Are you sure?”

He frowned at having his declaration questioned. He would have yelled had she not placed her hand on his arm. It simmered him just like that.

A gruff, “Yeah,” was all he could manage.

“You didn’t eat very much.” She was doubtful. Perhaps she was a lie detector?

“Were you watching me the whole time?” He scorned. It was enough for her to drop her hand. He smirked at the victory.

“No, but you worry me.”

“Why are you worried about me?”

“Because, you’ve helped me through a lot.”

“Oh… Is that it?”

“Tao, are you drunk?!” She exclaimed grabbing his shoulders to shake them.

“Maybe.”

Her expression flickered to surprise before hitting realization. “Seriously?! You smell of drink. Why would you drink so much?”

“I might be crazy,” he speculated with a sorrowful chuckle.

“I know you’re crazy.”

“Oh really?”

His eyes twinkled at her exasperation. They slowly devoured her, savoring her image in case he really didn’t get to see her again. He wasn’t that drunk, not enough to lose stability in movement, but she intoxicated him without trying. It wasn’t fair. How dare she?

She sighed, disappointed and ran her fingers through her hair. She pointed her at him as if she were about to lecture him, but shook her head and stomped her foot.

“I wanted to ask you something, but here you are, drunk!”

“Am not,” he countered dryly. Then his eyes sparked curiosity, “What were you going to ask?”

“It doesn’t matter,” she feigned a smile and nodded towards the view. “It doesn’t feel like Seoul from here, does it?”

Tao snorted. She was changing the subject. “What were you going to ask?” He repeated and nudged her with his shoulder.

Her gaze lingered on him, as if she were playing out a conversation in her head. Then she groaned and faced another direction pressing her palms against her cheeks. “It’s embarrassing.”

He didn’t say anything after that. Silence enveloped them, and nothing could be heard save the chatter from the house.

“I wanted to ask… I wanted to know…”

Even from behind her head, he could see her struggle with herself. All over-confidence dispersed, she was her raw self when she gained the courage to look him in the eye.

“Ask me to come to you. I-I’ll come, so just ask. I’ll come whenever you ask.” Her cheeks reddened, her voice fluctuated but her resolve didn’t waver. She didn’t break eye contact. Those eyes enthralled him.

“W-what are you doing?” She squeaked when he pushed his forehead against hers.

“Pretty, your eyes are pretty,” he let her know.

Blood rushed to her face but she didn’t push him away. Instead her strong gaze held his, as if she weren’t at all embarrassed by her earlier proclamation. Then again, neither was he… maybe.

His initiative was not his, but rather a conjuration of her bewitching eyes. One second he was mesmerized by how the moonlight adorned her, and next his arms were laced around her waist with his lips against hers. And then his soul was set alight. The world could have ended and he wouldn’t have batted an eyelash. He was deliriously thrilled upon kissing her, and when she encouraged him he was unable to tell black from white. He was a mad man. Truly lost. Blind with sight and chafed in emotion. There was truly no way to describe the episode, he felt.

His chest tightened making him emit a low growl. There had been no choice but to pull away when air was required. His chest heaved greedily as his lungs gulped for oxygen. He tipped her chin wanting to absorb those celestial orbs. There was something different projecting from them, something he hadn’t seen before.

Before he had a chance to think or speak, she asked, “Do you like me?”

Whether it was her sincere tone, or his demented mind frame, he was completely repulsed by everything.

“Like you? Why would I do that?” He’d wanted to spit those words at her. However he was incapable of doing so, with his incompetent lungs, he was only able to manage a breathy murmur.

“You kissed me,” she stated in wonder.

“So?”

“So?”

“Wanted to see, what it was like having an affair.”

“An affair?”

“Yeah, I know you’ll be coming to me after marriage. You’ll come whenever I ask, right?” His words were a scorching topping of hot oil, on bare skin, in a desert. They produced malevolent affliction for both parties.

She slapped him.

Seryung pressed her lips together, not sure if she were more disappointed in herself or him. Why did she constantly try to build a dam near a raging tycoon? She should have learnt her lesson the first time. Why did she endeavor again, building hope only to have it wash away till nothing but frothy sea was left behind? It was scarring. It was macabre. It was optimistic wishing on her part, but it was impossible.

She left him holding his cheek in amazement. Had he been expecting something different perchance, after curtly suggesting that she would cheat on her spouse? Of course he’d wanted to propel her away, but now an emptiness was beginning to surround him. It took him a while to recall that he was unbalanced. When she was near him, he wanted to push her away. When she left, he began to miss her.

He was mental.

Tao T_T
On the bright side, Mi Young is back in action! And she saved Tao from suicide! More importantly, SeTao kissed! Well... let's not dwell on the aftermath. **hides** They at least kissed right?
Eeep. What to do though? I'm not sorry. Tao will get better so I'm not sorry. Seo Kangjun is butting in quite fast isn't he? Tao's illness is all Kangjun's fault. Hm... What next? Btw, did you guy's pick an OST?