SEHUN

“” I groaned as I tried to get up but my hang over was too strong for me to ignore so I just plopped back to bed.

“I’m never going to drink that hard again” I muttered while I covered my eyes with my forearm, shielding me from the sunlight peeking through the opening that my curtain offered that woke me up in the first place.

“that’s what everyone says after getting a bad hang over, but still they drink hard after having said those” a voice that I haven’t heard for days now spoke.

I opened one eye, looked to the direction where her voice came from and saw that she was standing by the door frame, holding a tray in her arms.

She got her hair tied in a simple ponytail. She’s wearing a simple white sweater shirt paired with black jeans. With just a little make up on her, but she still looks so beautiful.

I miss her.

She gave me small smile as she walked closer to where I laid. She placed the tray on the floor since I didn’t have a bed side table yet. She sat down on my bed and helped me in getting up. She then went back to the tray that she was bringing, got the glass of water and some pain reliever which I took with her help.

“thank you”

“you’re welcome”

Then there was silence between us again.

I just silently observe her move around, putting down the glass of water, properly opening the curtains and then settling on my bed side. She tucked some hair behind her ear. She was about to say something but I stopped her from doing so.

“what are you doing here?” I asked, not trying to sound cold and indifferent. But, the reaction I got from told me that I came out cold and indifferent after all.

She looked taken aback but she composed herself. “the delivery arrives today, right? The interior designer should be here to help you put those furniture to place, right?” she answered with a smile.

“do you want to eat something? I can fix you something, just don’t demand for anything that’s hard to prepare, ok?” she asked.

“what time is it?” I asked as I tried to look for my phone in bed, ignoring the question she posed awhile ago. She looked at her wrist watch then answered, “it’s already 1 in the afternoon. You must be hungry, anything that you want to eat?”

“I can do the arranging, you don’t need to bother helping me anymore. And I’m not hung---“ my answer was cut off by the sound produced my stomach.

She chuckled then kissed my cheek which made my heart skip beats. The heck? What am I? a teenager?

“don’t even try to deny it, Oh Sehun. I know you’re hungry. So, why don’t you get a shower while I prepare you something” she bid as she walked away and out of my bedroom.

I followed what she said and took a shower. I honestly didn’t want to deal with Jessica just yet because I still don’t know what to do about our situation right now. But since she’s already here, I guess I’ll just go with the flow now and just let things happen.

I stepped out of the shower and changed into just some white shirt and sweat pants. As I stepped out of the room, I immediately walked to the kitchen where I found Jessica setting up the table for both of us. It seems so natural to see her there.

She turned around and saw me staring at her. She raised her eyebrow then smiled, “what are you standing there for? Come here and eat now”

I walked towards the table that she set up for me.

“thanks” I said before digging in.

“that’s what I’m here for, preparing your meals, planning the arrangement of your furniture, treating you whenever you have hangover” she replied. I remained mum.

“how’s my cooking? Did it improve?” she asked after silence consumed us for about 10 minutes. I just nodded my head as an answer.

I remained silent ignoring the fact that she’s sitting right across me.

“Sehun” she called out for my attention. I looked up and stared at her. It seems that she’s finding the courage to say something but when I stared at her, the courage that she was gathering vanished.

“You don’t need to explain anything. I understand” I told her and went back to my plate. “I understand that you don’t want to shock auntie Xi by telling her that we have a thing going on between us. So, you don’t need to explain Soo Yeon. It’s fine, really” I told her with finality before standing up and bringing my plate to the sink and wash it.

“But Sehun-“ Jessica was cut off again when my phone suddenly started ringing. I pulled my phone out of my pocket and seeing that it was Yura, I immediately answered.

“What do you want, Dr. Kim? It’s my precious day off and you’re disturbing me”

[Sehun… I need help]

My face contorts upon hearing her say those words. It’s not like I haven’t heard her say those words before but the tone in your Yura’s voice suddenly made me worry.

“Yura… what’s wrong?”

[C-c-c-can you come over?]

“where are you?”

[I’m at home]

“okay, I’ll be there. Just wait for me, okay?”

I rushed to my bedroom, got my car keys and wallet and was about to storm out of the house when Jessica stopped me on my tracks.

“Is Yura your first love?” she asked me as she stood before me, blocking my way.

“What?” I asked in disbelief. Where in the world did she get this idea of Yura being my first love?

“Answer me Sehun. Is Yura your first love?!” she asked again.

“I don’t need to answer that Jessica” I noticed that she flinched when I uttered her English name. But like awhile ago, she immediately composed herself. “No. You do!” she answered back.

I closed my eyes and tried to calm myself.

“No, she’s not”

“Then why are you going to her right this instant?!”

“Why are you even asking me this question?!”

“Why aren’t you answering me?!”

“I already did. I told you Kim Yura isn’t my first love. And as to why I am going there? She’s my friend Jessica and she needs me. So, I’m going”

“you’ll choose her over me?!” she accused

“do you need me here like she needs me there?” she was shocked with the question that I asked her. It was very obvious, her face says it all. I too, was shocked that that question came out of my lips.

My question got Jessica muted for awhile. “so, you really are choosing her over me? And you’re telling me that she isn’t your first love? You’re still not over her are you? and that’s why you are choosing her, your friend over me, your girlfriend”

It’s as if I popped a vein and I lost my control.

“SHE’S NOT MY FIRST LOVE, DAMMIT!” I blew up. “And for ’s sake Jessica, weren’t you the one who denied our relationship?! So, stop pointing out that you’re my ing girlfriend because you clearly told me that I am just your friend!”

I was panting after I said my piece. I saw that her eyes were starting to get watery and I knew I have to leave before her tears finally flow out of her eyes. And so, I decided to walk away already but then I felt a pair of hands wrap around my waist and a head leaning on my back.

“I’m sorry” she whispered. She was starting to hiccup which meant that she was already crying bawling her eyes out on my shirt. Her crying voice was getting muffled by my back. I remained silent and I tried to remove her arms around me but she only held on to me tighter.

“I am sorry Sehun. I’m really sorry Sehun. Please forgive me Sehun. It’s not my intention to deny our relationship. I was just caught off guard with her appearance. I’ll clarify things later with Ma and I’ll tell her about us” she continued.

When she referred to Mrs. Xi as ‘Ma’, I felt a pang of pain on my chest. I know I am being unreasonable and selfish. I know that their connection can no longer be erased. If not for Luhan’s disease she would have changed her family name by now. She was ready to do that for Luhan. And that somehow, it’s Mrs. Xi’s way to make amends to how she treated Jessica.

But for me, it somehow felt like she still hasn’t let go of Luhan that’s why she’s still referring to Mrs. Xi as her mother-in-law and that deep in her heart she’s still yearning for Luhan.

I finally removed myself from her hold and said, “I need to go Jessica”

-----------------------

“I’m sorry to have called you Sehun. I’m such a bother, ain’t I?”

I gave her a glare before patting her head, “Yura, you’re like a sister to me already. Don’t think that you were bothering me. I know just by listening to your voice that you need a friend to count on”

“Thanks, Sehun”

“But, you gave me a scare awhile ago, you should know that” I told her. She gave me a sheepish smile and said, “I’m really sorry. To think I’m a doctor, I should’ve handled this situation better”

“Exactly. I mean you sounded so scared and worried when in fact you should be happy and all. Bearing a child is a blessing” I reminded her. She smiled again this time while caressing her still flat tummy.

“Three weeks? And you got married just a week ago. That means-“

“Just shut up Sehun. You don’t need to point it out” she cut me off with a glare making me laugh at her.

“Anyways, where is Yixing? Aren’t you two supposed to be in your honeymoon right now?” I asked as my laughter died down.

“he’s been called to report to the base, so we had to cancel our honeymoon. I tried calling him but he wasn’t answering his phone, he was probabl