“Can I help you?” Luhan sneered.

“Nope, just getting some water.” Kris smirked, “Don’t mind me~”

With a deep exhale Sehun stood up and dragged Luhan back to their room. The mood was definitely ruined, but it would’ve been more awkward if the two had just lingered on the couch.

“Anyway, you were thaying you were worried about Tao.” Sehun tightly shut the door behind the two.

“Oh, yeah. Well I was just thinking, there has got to be a way around this. I mean, we’re Titans for Christ’s sake. There must be something we can do, right?” Luhan rubbed his temples.

“You know, not to thound rude, but what if there ithn't? What if the only way to be free ith if we die?”

“How could you say that?! I don’t know about you, but I don’t want to die!” Luhan shouted.

Both froze for a moment and listened to the echo. They could hear movement from outside the room, someone had probably heard them.

“It’s just Suho and Kris. They’re standing outside the door. We’ve seemed to wake a few of the others too… Sorry.” Luhan sighed.

“You guyth can come in.” Sehun opened the door for Suho and Kris.

“Are you two okay?” Suho intruded.

“Yeah, we were just talking,” Sehun explained.

“About?” Suho began poking Luhan’s cheeks.

“Stop~” Luhan smiled.

“Tao,” Sehun solemnly said. Kris had been distracted by a small photo album lying on the desk, but snapped his head up as soon as the other’s name was said.

“What about Tao, Sehunnieeee?” Suho turned to cheer up the former.

“We’re just wondering how long it is until he goes back in time again,” Sehun said, not as entertained as Luhan was by cheek poking.

“Well it is his decision, you know,” Kris added. Everyone froze at his sudden comment.

“Yeah, but… he is just making it harder on himself.” Luhan placed his hand on Kris’s shoulder.

“But he doesn’t want to die.”

“But maybe he'th been fighting destiny for too long,” Sehun said quickly.

“What’s with this serious mood you guys?” Chanyeol and Baekhyun were standing at the doorway.

“It’s 3 in the morning, go to sleep,” Baekhyun complained.

“Sorry for waking you, go back to sleep.” Suho waved them off.

“Let’s just end this conversation here. We’ll just let things roll out and see what happens.” Luhan exhaled.

Everyone parted and dragged themselves into bed.

Except Kris.

He was half-surprised to find Tao already cuddled in his bed. Not yet ready to sleep, Kris decided to take a peek at Tao’s diary. He decided he was going to flip to a random entry and then go to bed. The curiosity of what had been written was killing him, so he just opened to a random page and began reading:

“The house is so empty now that everyone is gone. Except for Kris and I and he won’t even look at me right now. I always hate this part of the story. Instead of fighting tomorrow, I wish there was a way for both of us to be Victors. Like in an old book I read, the heroine and her lover threatened to kill themselves at the same time so the city didn’t have a winner. Too bad the humans would just celebrate if we both killed ourselves. I miss Krissie. I miss Suho-ba. I miss everyone. I even miss snarky Luhan. I’m currently debating going back right now. I wonder how far back I should go? I’m thinking right before Kris and I meet so I can see what changes were made. I hope that Kris and I always meet before we’re captured, that way we’ve already fallen in love and it won’t be awkward between us.

Well the sun is starting to rise. I’d better travel back before they call both of us. I’ll see you in the next paradox,

Huang ZiTao”

“What are you doing?” A voice behind Kris said. Kris was surprised and accidently dropped the diary.

“I was uh…I was…uh,” Kris stuttered. Tao simply smiled at the reaction.

“Don’t worry, I don’t care. You’ve read my diary more than once. Usually to find out something, so what are you curious about?” Tao rolled over.

“How…how far have you gone in time?” Kris asked.

“Like how far along the timeline?”

“Yeah.”

“In the original timeline, I had gone past our battle. They treated me like a king, but I felt awful the whole time. When I first went back was when they tried to kill me after the ceremony. My body just naturally rejects unnatural death. Like if someone stabbed me, I’d unconsciously go back in time to prevent my death. That’s part of the reason I’ve gone back so many times, because I can’t help it.”

“Part of the reason?”

“The… the other part is...” Tao’s eyes glazed over with water. With a deep inhale Tao whispered, “Because I couldn’t live with myself if you were dead.”

Kris quickly shuffled over to hold Tao as he softly sobbed. Both were worried for the events that will unfold in the future.

“You know, Luhan keeps saying he’s going to find a way around this.” Kris tried cheering Tao up.

“He says that every time, but nothing changes.” Tao sniffled.

“Maybe something will change this time. You said a piece of the past changes, maybe a miracle will happen.”

“The piece that changed was we didn’t meet in high school. You never got the chance to hang out with me or confess to me, or hold my hand as we told my parents about us, or fall madly in love with me, or truly embrace me, or explore Hong Kong with me, or morn the deaths of our friends as they brutally murder each other, or be there when we comfort each other when we kill someone, or look me in the eyes and tell me you love me more than life itself as you sacrifice yourself so I could live on…. You don’t understand at all how much this all has hurt me, Krissie. I love you too much to continue without you,” Tao confessed.

“Tao…I - ”

“I don’t need you to love me back, or even like me back. I just need you to know how all this time I’ve only had my eyes on you.” Tao lightly kissed the older.

“Let’s just go to sleep, okay?” Kris suggested with a sad smile.

“Okay.” Tao immediately cuddled against the older, feeling the warmth of his body that he’d missed for so long.

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Well, that was emotionally exhausting to write… but I finally did it. To be honest, I’m also missing someone like Tao is, so I kinda sympathized with him. I hope you guys aren’t too sad now. Like I said, I promise a happy ending. I’m also thinking of making a separate story for Tao’s diary, all 24 paradoxes. Do you think you’d like reading something like that? Anyway, I’m happy for all the comments I’m getting, thank you for showing so much love to my story~