37) (requested by Giselle Camille Cruzado Ramos, Wardah Zahra Aprilyyaa & Jezryl Velasco on fb)

Note: _____ stands for your name! :)

_________________________________

'Lost love'

It was just an usual boring day, with nothing much to do, except listening to the professor’s blabbering while playing some games or texting..

I was playing with my pencil, thinking about something to draw.. The atmosphere wasn’t very inspiring, with all those stupid terms hiting our ears “gently.”

I threw away the pencil, sighing.. Didn’t aim very good.. The pencil fell on the floor. I’ve reached for it then..

Me: “Aw! That hurt!”

I raised my eyes and saw the most breathtaking stare ever.. The brown colour of his eyes, that hair, and those lips.. Ok? Was I crazy or something? I got my pencil and place it on the notebook. I tried to pay attention at what the professor was saying, but I just felt that someone was watching me. I turned to my left and saw that damn hot look again. Is he going to check me up all day?? What’s with that weird y look??

Me: “Hm..”

Boy, smirking: “Nice…”

Me: “Excuse me?”

Boy: “Your face looks so nice while you’re blushing..”

I beg your pardon? Was I?.. Why would I? I just.. Yah! _____!! Come to your senses!!! Helloo! He’s just a boy.. a damn hot looking boy.. Ok.. going back to drawing..

Boy: “Not feeling inspired?”

Me: “Is not your business!”

Boy: “Yah.. why so mean? I’m trying to be polite!”

Me: “Indeed.. I am sorry! Not in a great mood today!”

Boy: “Tell me about that.. I almost fell asleep when your pencil got me back to reality..”

Me: “Ha ha.. really?”

Boy: “Yep.. so.. what do you wanna draw?”

Me: “I don’t know.. that’s the point..”

Boy: “Yah… could you draw me?”

Me: “What?!”

Boy: “Yah.. I’d love to have a drawing with my hot face..”

Me, expressionless: “You do love yourself…”

Boy, smirking: “Who doesn’t?”

Me: “So cheesy.. I for example.. don’t give a damn about your looks” (such a liar I was)

Boy, reading my mind: “You’re not so good at lying.. But.. you do have to try, no?”

I was about to defend myself, when the class finally came to an end. I put my notebook in my bag, grabbed my pencil and ran to the exit.

*

This was a very tiring day.. So many classes.. Seriously.. Why should we learn so many things when we just want to do one in life????

I was pushing myself to get to the last class when I passed by the dance studio of our college.. The music was quite catchy so, because of my curiosity, I got closer to take a look. I opened the door.. There was only one person dancing.. His moves were so quick and powerful.. You could feel the passion flowing towards every corner of the room.

I kept looking at him, although I couldn’t see his face very well due to the cap he was wearing.. I just let myself go with the flow, so to say.. The music was amazing.. I was patting my legs following the rhythm.. I really didn’t notice that the boy was looking at me.. He got closer and put his index finger on my nose. I startled..

Me: “What the.. You?”

Boy: “Missed me?”

Me: “Hm.. you wish..”

He lean towards me, biting his lower lip.. Yes.. I was about to go crazy.. I just had to control myself. He kept giving me that stupid stare, that just melted my heart.. He got closer.. I knew he was about to kiss me.. I just.. What to do?? Ok… close your eyes.. Keep calm.. Ok.. So? Why is it taking so long?

Boy: “Err..  mmm..”

I opened my eyes and saw the reflection of my stupid-looking stare in the mirror.. The boy was at the door playing with the doorknob.. He waved to me, smirking.. Damn!!!!!! I was so stupid! I got out of the room and head off to my class.. The boy was walking slowly behind me.. That’s it!

Me: “Why are you following me?”

Boy: “Who’s following you? I am going to my class.”

Me: “Hm.. same old line.. going in the same direction.”

Boy: “Well.. it is true.. I am not following you.. don’t think you’re so interesting, that I’ll lose my time admiring you..”

Me: “Now that’s rude you rascal!!!”

The boy pinched my cheek and ran away.. When he was about to turn left, he gave me that hot look again, winking and smirking at the same time..

Boy: “I’m Kim Jong In by the way.. but rascal sounds quite hot too!”

Why you!!!!! God!!! If I ever get my hands on him.. I’ll.. I’ll…

*

So this was the beginning of a new relationship.. Didn’t know how to name it.. We weren’t friends.. nor did we hate each other or something.. Is just that he was really showing off everytime.. Which was so annoying.. I can’t deny that he made me feel secure everytime I was near him, even if he kept teasing me whenever he had the chance...

We were now together almost all the time, since we had the same classes, with the exception of the dance class, which wasn’t really my thing.. You could really feel a balance between us.. I was the quiet, calm type, that kept the relationship under control.. I was always trying to fade out, not getting any attention, being socially awkward..

 I really intended to act normal and make friends.. But I just couldn’t get myself to blend in.. Like… I kept stumbling and fumbling around.. getting myself in an embarrassing situation everytime..

On the other hand, Jong In was really a social freak.. always in the center of attention, the never-coming-true-dream crush of so many girls, the main reason why the envy of many boys was literally boiling so fast, that sometimes it would just… BOOOM!!! He was over confident about his dancing and character..

I didn’t blame him for that.. He was indeed handsome and very talented. He was a great dancer, and this dream of his was what made him focus every day.. He didn’t give a damn about what the people around him would think.. Though he had one thing that really kept him worried whether he’ll be able to become star.. His skin colour..

If you ask me… that was the main point of his iness.. But, in the end, we all know that if there’s something we don’t like about ourselves, we won’t pay attention to the praising of others.. We’ll always have that disturbing feeling inside our hearts…

I tried to make him understand that people will be amazed about his dancing, not caring about the fact that he had darker skin.. And the most important thing for an artist was to give a great performance and win the hearts of people.. But, talk to the hand….

Me: “Yah! Can’t you stop?”

Jong In: “I just.. What if..”

Me: “Come on! Everything will be just fine!”

Jong In: “This is my 3^rd audition.. Like seriously.. I am loosing my confidence!”

Me: “Stop saying that! Just go there and dance! Focus on the music.. feel it.. show your passion! You’re damn good at this and you know it!”

Jong In: “Uff.. well.. ok.. I trust you! Thanks!”

Me: “Yah.. no need to thank your friend!”

Jong In, smirking: “Told you that one day you’ll fall..”

Me, blushing: “What? You rascal!”

Jong In: “I love it when you call me like that! Oh.. my turn! Wish me luck!”

Me: “Good luck!”

*

I was greeting my last customer, while cleaning the table. It was a wonderful day.. I head off to the kitchen, to wash the last dishes.. My mate came closer, for a little chat before going home..

Mate: “You’re working more than your employees.”

Me: “He he.. well.. I like it.. it was my dream.. apart from drawing.. so..”

Mate: “About that.. I saw a picture you forgot here the other day.”

Me: “Really? And?”

Mate: “Well.. I am not good at expressing my opinion on such things.. but that drawing had something really special.. like… I don’t know..”

Me: “Where is it?”

Mate: “Let me get it.”

She head off to the changing room and came back with the picture.. She sat at the table and looked at it, trying to figure out how to describe it.. She kept staring at it, until I’ve finished my work. I dried up my hands and sat near her. I took a look at the picture.. Didn’t know I forgot this one.

Mate: “Is.. like.. although this purple-blue combination with this cute yellow gives the picture a warm touch.. I just.. I can feel the pain getting inside me, making me sigh because of the sadness.”

Me: “That’s nice.. I don’t really think of the feelings.. I just draw..”

Mate: “Yah.. this picture has a good story behind, I bet.. like.. the sunset.. and these brown eyes.. that lost look fading in the sun light.. Is amazing.. tell me.. who’s he? I feel like I’ve seen him before.”

Me: “Hm.. a lost friend..”

Mate: “Can I keep this?”

Me: “Sure!”

*

A beautiful warm evening in late autumn.. Watching the sunset, while sipping slowly my green tea. I had my unfinished drawing beside me.. I just couldn’t get on.. My mind was stuck.. Like I couldn’t keep drawing him from my memories.. Everything seemed so far away in time, fading out little by little each day...

The doorbell brought me back to reality. I put down the cup and looked for my cardigan. I put it on my shoulders and head off to the front door. I smiled at the sight of my friend. She got in with a little bag.. That meant just one thing: brownies.

Me: “A cup of tea?”

Friend: “Yes, thank you.. I’ll go in the garden.”

Me: “Ok..”

I went to the kitchen and made tea for my friend.. I took the cup and got outside in the garden. She was looking at my drawing. I gave her the tea and reached for the pack of brownies. I took one and sat on my chair.. My friend turned around to face the sun.. She walked away slowly, inhaling the fresh air.

Friend: “It’s beautiful..”

Me: “What?”

Friend: “The view.. good choice for a house..”

Me: “Thanks..”

Friend: “Was this your idea?”

I looked at her.. What did she mean? I placed my hands in my lap, while thinking about her question. She kept looking at the sun, not turning around..

Me: “What do you mean with that?”

Friend: “Well.. you always wanted this kind of house… You were so desperate to buy this one in particular.. ”

Me: “Hm.. I just saw it and I liked it.. not big deal..”

Friend: “I’ve been knowing you for 5 years already.. I know that you have no idea how to lie.. So what’s the story behind this house?”

-flashback-

I was getting really bored.. Jong In has been looking at his laptop for the past half an hour.. I was wondering what was so important that kept him so focused.. I put away my phone and got near him to take a look.

Me: “What are you doing?”

Jong In: “Look at this! Isn’t it beautiful?”

Me: “Indeed.. but.. why are you looking at pictures with houses? Plan to buy one?”

Jong In: “I wish so.. this one! But it’s too far away from here..”

Me: “But you can design one like that.. it’s not big deal.. ”

Jong In: “Is not the same thing.. anyway.. what are you looking at me like that?”

Me, chuckling: “I didn’t know you’re so old fashioned..”

Jong In: “Hm.. told you that I’m a mysterious person..”

Me: “And a romantic one.. doesn’t really fit with your hot image..”

Jong In: “Hm.. so you do think I’m hot?”

Me: “No.. I just.. ”

Jong In: “You’ll fall… you’ll fall…”

Me: “YAH!”

-end of flashback-

Friend: “Where are you lost?”

Me: “In my memories, sorry... there’s nothing really with this house..”

Friend: “Err.. by the way.. I see you’re drawing again..”

Me: “Um.. sort of… nothing comes up..”

Friend: “Same eyes.. ”

Me: “Yeah.. but.. I can’t really recall his face anymore.. ”

Friend: “Well.. you’re the one that doesn’t want to see him..”

Me: “Excuse me? What do you know about that?”

Friend: “How long are you going to keep it inside?”

Me: “What are you talking about?”

Friend: “Well.. all your paintings have the same character.. isn’t that obvious? He’s not just a lost friend… more like a lost love..”

Me: “That’s not true.. I never loved anyone.. ”

Friend: “You don’t even believe yourself.. The doorbell is ringing. Let me go and see who is it.”

Me: “Ok..”

I got up and walked slowly to my white roses.. I was touching one of them, watching the pinkish sky. Love? What was that? A faded sorrow hidden in the darkest part of my soul. Never to blossom and always there to stab my heart every second.. I heard small steps.. Guess my friend got back.. I wanted to ask her who was it..

I felt the warmth of those hands getting inside my body, making my every cell tremble. That breath.. That soft and cold skin touching mine, making me sigh.. That hot whisper that made everything die around us, leaving the two of us lost in that moment: “I’ve finally found you, my love!”..

I’ve closed my eyes, letting a small tear make its way to my chin.. He kept hugging me, calling out my name. I replied softly: “You rascal!”

___________________________________

Hope you like it! :) Please continue to love and support EXO! Thank you for reading! God bless you all!