That night I spent in a hotel, together with Chanyeol. We couldn't return to the dorm. Well that's what Chanyeol said. In the moment it feels like Chanyeol tries to avoid every contact with the others, and he wants the same for me.

He wanted that we share a room together. I rejected that idea. I wanted my own room. I wanted to be alone.
He wasn't that amused of my desicion, but whatever.

As I collapsed on my bed I tried to call Kyungsoo, but nobody answered. I started to cry again. I don't want to lose him. Until now I didn't sended the contract to YG and I hope Chanyeol didn't do the same. 

I couldn't really sleep that night. I was busy with crying and contacting Kyungsoo or one of his family members, like his mom, dad and siblings.
Nobody answered. Like somebody would answer in the middle of the night.

The next morning came fast.
Luckily I took a little nap, but I still do look like a zombie-panda-mix. Dark circle under my eyes, they also look a bit puffy due all the crying last night. I don't look happy. Pale actually. I feel sick. 

I spot a calendar in the hotel room. It's novemeber now. This novemeber I have my 10 years anniversay with EXO. 10 years ago I met them. It was in a novemeber. I can remember it. I remember how I met Kris in the elevator and had like no clue that he will be one of the closest person just a week later.
How I had a dance battle against Kai and somehow won. How I met Baekhyun and Chanyeol on the kitchen doorframe while preparing breakfast for them. 
And don't forget the horrible start with Luhan. How much we hated each other and later he had a crush on me.
Talking about the crushes. How 4 boys could fall in love with me. Nobody before fell for me. My first kiss was an accident and somehow I regret falling on that person.

Next year is our 10 years debut anniversay. It has been really 10 years. 10 years of pain, tears, fun, awards, traveling, love and family-like life. It was awesome but now...everything seems to end.

I tought it would end like that:
Everybody has a small family. We all meet after some years for a big family-like meeting. A BBQ maybe? Our kids are playing together. Some of them might be old enough to maybe fall for each other. The smaller ones are playing with whatever they find.
Everybody thinks back to the beginning and the past years.

But now...everything seems to change. Change to fast and not the way I imagined it. Life can be so...

"Dani? The breakfast buffet will close soon. You should eat something" I hear Chanyeol's deep voice in front of my room door.
I don't answer.
I don't want to.
I'm not hungry.
All I want is
Kyungsoo.

I want to talk with him, or just see him.

~~2 hours later~~

I fell asleep on my bed once again. I stand up, quickly grab all my stuff and leave the room. I make my way to the hotel lobby. To the counter, so that I can pay for this night and quickly leave before Chanyeol sees me.
Luckily the girl on the counter is fast. She wishes me a great day and hands me my credit card. I grabd it quickly and run out of the hotel. 

I run to the parking lot and search my car. Why am I even searching it. The huge white Range Rover is noticableb, but I can't see him. I rummage in my small bag. Where are the damn keys?

Then I remember
Flashback:
"I need the car tomorrow morning. I want to drive to YG"
"Do whatever you want, but leave me alone for now" I say and angrily throw the car keys to Chanyeol
End

Damn and now?
I take my purse out. I have enough money for the subway, but not enough for a taxi. Subway should be enough.
Sunglasses on, tie the hair into a messy bun and walk off.

I walk the stairs down to the subway station. Pay my ticket and walk to the trains. The next subway will arrive in about 5 minutes. I had luck. The one I have to take just leaves every 30 minutes. 

As the subway finally arrive I rush inside and sit down on a free place. Try not to get any attention now. 5 stations and you will finally arrive at the dorm. 

---EXO dorm---

As I arrive I take the elevator upstairs. On our floor I meet some neighbours, they give me confused looks, I just smile at them.
I rummage again in my bag. Damn the doorkeys are attached on the same keychain like the car keys. And the car keys are with...Chanyeol.

I ring the bell. Nobody opens. I ring once again. Nobody. A last time. Nobody. I start slamming with my fist on the door. I know somebody is at home. I can hear the Tv! Open the damn  door now!
I start yelling.

"Open now! I know you're at home! Open the damn door!"
The first neighbours open their doors and peek outside. I don't care for them in the moment. All I want is to enter this dman dorm now!

Suddenly the door opens and someone drags me inside.
"Don't be so loud...damn.." Xiumin says and rubs his head "I was asleep, sorry."
"It's okay..."
"Come, I make some coffee"

I follow him into the kitchen. He seems to be alone at home. Xiumin starts preparing the coffee, I sit down  on our kitchen table.
"Where did you spent your night. We missed you. Kyungsoo was totally worried"
"He was worried?" I ask "I tried to call him, nobody answered. I tried to cla his family-"
"His family is on Jeju"
"Oh"
"Kyungsoo...was angry until around 2am. Then he started to worry about you. He tought you would come home"
"I was in a hotel that night"
"But you don't seem like you slept"
"I didn't sleep at all."

Xiumin places the hot coffee mugs on the table and sits down in front of me.
"If you guys really want to leave SM, it's totally okay. We will support you guys" he says with a calm voice.
"Really?"
"Of course. It was just shocking yesterday...but if you guys really want to leave....it is your desicion. We will stay here in SM. Chen is now a vocal teacher, Kai a model, Baekhyun and Kyungsoo are probably going to debut as a sub-ballad-unit and I will start giving vocal and dance lessons to trainees. And don't forget, we all somehow wanted to end this."

"What to you mean?"
"We're all a bit tired of the whole EXO thing here. We want to test something new, like you and Chanyeol. Being a vocal and dance teacher can be so funny. I can remember how horrible my trainee days were, but now I can treat the new trainess much better"

"EXO will disban with us leaving..." I mutter
"I know. We all know it. Soo Man once told us if more member would leave, we wuld disban. But with EXO's disban other doors will open up. New experiences, new jobs, everything will be new. Don't worry. Go and exchange to YG"

"Yeah..but-"
"No buts. I talked with Kyungsoo. Told him the exactly same things, he seemed to understand me. He just wants the best for you. That's all." Xiumin says, takes his mug and stands up.

"Where are you going?"
"Going to watch some Tv. Kyungsoo should be here in some minutes"
"how...why..how"
"My phone just vibrated. He went out to buy some groceries, he said he would contact me as soon as he would come home. So yeah, eother way you wait here or you join me on the sofa" Xiumin says and smiles brightly. I smile too.

"I join you" I say and follow him
________________________________________________________________________________________

Second update!

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