'ok...don't worry..everything will be alright' I whisper and try to calm myself down, holding the pregancy test in my left and tipping on my chest with the right hand.

I'm sitting on our bathtub and locked the door before enterting the bathroom. I don't want that Kyunsgoo gets to know anything if I'm not pregnant. Nobody except of me knows of it.

But hey..I'm a girl, sooner or later I will tell it to somebody and if it's just Soojin.

I look at my watch. How long do I have to wait again? 2 minutes? 3 minutes? I don't know it exactly.

~knock~knock~

'sweetie are you inside?' Kyungsoo asks in front of the door.

'Yes!' I answer and start to shake a bit. I'm so nervous.

Another look on my watch. 2 minutes have passed. A look on the test, nothing.

'Is everything ok?'

'Yes...I-I'm just...making myself a facemask'

'Oh hahaha' Kuyngsoo laughs 'But why you locked the door? I know how funny you look with a mask'

'It's embarassing and I don't want to see you laughing at me'

'Oh sweetie don't worry I won't laugh this time'

Another minutes must have passed...

'nono stay outside until I'm done'

'And how long does that take?'

'I don't know..just give me some minutes'

'Well then...call me when you're done'

'ok!'

I slowly sink my head, take a look at the test. A small sign has appeared. I take the small instruction book out of the pregnancy test box to read what kind of 'result' I've got.

'So...a circle is for negative and...a ..oh no..' a triangle for positive. I've got a triangle. No...please not yet...

I know how koreans will react to it. Of course everybody knows that we're dating, but koreans prefere a married pregnancy over a just couple one. Maybe..maybe the result is wrong, right? I-I mean..

I start to cry.

I'm not ready to be a father

Kyungsoo's words echo in my head.

To be honest...I'm not ready too...

I'm about to debut with Chanyeol under YG. I will destroy his dream. After I gave birth I won't have time to debut anymore. Only...if I would leave Kyungsoo alone with the baby. I know he would be an awesome father but then again his words: I'm not ready to be a father.

I walk to the sink and hold myself on it. To be honest I feel so sick in the moment, all I want is to sleep, but before throw up. And that is exactly what I do. Right into the sink, the toilet is maybe rigth next to me...but it's too late. I wipe the everything off my mouth and brush my teeth, I don't want to worry Kyungsoo and I also don't want to tell anything to him.

Drying my face with a towel and taking my make-up bag out of the closet are the next things I do. I start to hide my eyebags with conceler, next using more make-up to tan my really pale fair skin. I sob again. No don't cry now. Kyungsoo is waiting outside. Put on a smile. I can't...

Try it.

Just once.

Don't worry him. 

I exhale a last time before i place the small bag back into the closet and unlock the door.

'Ah Kyungsoo I-'

He was standing right in front of the door. His arms crossed in front of his chest, his look totally serious. He leans closer to me and takes a deep breath.

'You vomitted'

'I-I-I'

'Don't deny it. I can still smell it under the tons of perfume. Are you ok?' he says and places his arms on my shoulders.

I sob again. Don't worry him, don't cry!

'I-I just don't feel that well. I'm nervous to be honest. Chanyeol and I have to record our new song tomorrow'

'Oh babyyy' he says and reliefs 'Don't worry, we already recorded so many songs, why are you still nervous?'

'I don't know..I guess because of the new location?'

'I will come with you tomorrow, ok? So when you need help I will be your vocal instructor'

I relief in the inside. He really believes what I'm talking about.

'You would really do that? Thank you' I say and quickly hug him, because I really can't smile in the moment.

'You know what I will cook something for you now, ok?'

'But you have to rest-'

'No you go and take a shower and I'll cook' I say and rush off to the kitchen, leaving him behind.

On my way I place my hands on my lower belly. Tears are leaving my eyes. Why are you making trouble now..can't you wait a little longer....?

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Next chapter is here hehe

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