“Puzzle, are you ready?” The smirking leader is what the video ends with and music starts to play with the audience screaming their loudest as the concert isn’t over just yet.

Dressed in purple concert logo t-shirt and shorts, 5 Pieces appear on stage performing [Hey! Hey! Hey] brightly with big smiles and light footsteps. Hannah is wearing black boots with gray knee-high socks to her outfit, her feet feels light without having to wear high heels and she is having fun performing first [Hey! Hey! Hey!] and then being adorable with her ladies for [I Love You] – that is probably one of the cutest and most fun to perform because the ladies are silly and cute and the audience freaks out over every single thing they do. Since they did only an acapella with [I Love You] earlier in the concert, they wanted to surprise their fans by performing it now during the encore; and surely they were surprised, but not as surprised as they soon will get.

“We hope you’ve had a great time tonight!” Carolina is cheering out to the audience when the next song begins to play, and the girls are suddenly running around going crazy with their fans, happy to see and hear the surprise of 15.000 people when Julia’s solo song [I’m Sleepy] is played. It’s her solo song but they do it in a group-version, going a little too crazy just because the other ladies show their love to Julia’s popular summer hit song now at the concert.

Hannah forgets to sing many times when she is supposed to, even if she is randomly singing along to the song without the microphone all the time, and the fans closest to her laughs at her mistakes, finding them adorable to know that 5 Pieces are just as excited as the audience – which is not just for this song but for the whole concert.

She admits while walking around during the final talk of the concert to wave, bow and say goodbye along with the four ladies that this concert easily beats last year’s concert. And it is not because of the songs they are performing or the fact that they were so clueless and nervous for their first concert ever last year compared to now, no, it is because the audience seems overwhelmed for the concert. Hannah has never witnessed an audience so crazy for every single song, and a part of her want to say that it is because 5 Pieces have grown since last year; they know how to pull off a concert, they know how to entertain their audience, they mix their fun selves with their charismatic and professional selves, keeping it all about 5 Pieces and Puzzle and she thinks they have done a great job today. Which is why, when they are bowing and thanking every fan at every direction in the hall, Hannah can’t stop smiling with satisfaction. Her family has nothing to do with this; this is all 5 Pieces and Puzzle – no religion or language, no blood relatives or haters – it is all about them who are here today, tonight.

“Thank you so much!” the ladies are shouting when waving their hands. Hannah keeps bowing, holding on to Julia’s hand to not fall off the stage in her endless bowing and she smiles widely when waving with her whole arm out at the audience, giving another bow when Julia bows.

It’s hilarious when coming backstage, because their fans keep chanting out for an encore, and the ladies know it will be an extra encore. Just for today and tomorrow, 5 Pieces runs back up on the stage to perform [Can’t Stop], doing it with the audience screaming loudly during the whole song in excitement that it yet isn’t over. At the end of the song, 5 Pieces do as Lee Sooman told them to; they walk out over the stages to take their positions, to surprise the audience by performing the arena tour remix of [Daze]; the remix begins with the crazy footwork while singing the chorus. This is the very, absolute last song for the first BLACK & WHITE concert – the opening of their tour. And it is awesome. Everyone is singing and dancing along to the pieces on stage throwing their hairs to the loud music, falling down on their knees to go totally crazy with their fans.

 

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After the concert, Hannah has the feeling through her whole body that she has given her everything. She didn’t cry; she pulled through the whole concert like a professional and she had a blast doing it, her voice wasn’t ruined and she didn’t make too many noticeable mistakes, and most of all; the audience loved the concert. That she just twelve hours earlier was crying hysterically because of her mother; it feels days away. Hannah has let it all out on the stage, and she feels satisfied with herself. Sweaty and completely exhausted, 5 Pieces are backstage after the concert, breathing out and collecting their minds with smiles when receiving congratulations and praise from those around them.

Shoes are off and Hannah is leaning back on her doctor’s command while someone is spraying some relaxing spray on her feet; it is really good to use after the heavy footwork from the concert and all five ladies will thanks to that be prepared to do the second concert tomorrow.

“Let’s just hope you can do tomorrow just as great as today,” Manager Lim is praising them with his hands together, patting Emelia on her shoulder for the good job.

“I’m going to make Carolina cry tomorrow,” Maria promises and she opens when Carolina looks surprised to be mentioned in the threat. “You never really cry on stage the way the rest of us do, and I will tomorrow make sure to pinch your sensitive skin until those tears break out and show me that you are not a stupid mascot who can only laugh and be silly.”

It is a threat between friends, everyone knows it, but Hannah still gets worried when spotting Lee Sooman by the door, hearing him say;

“Ops, I hope you don’t fight because of your differences. That is what makes you all special in this group.”

She isn’t really sure what he means, though it doesn’t matter as he steps up to each lady to pat them on the shoulder and give words about the concert to each one of them. He hugs Hannah as she is the one polite enough to stand up for him, while the other ladies are comfortably sitting down and resting, and they take his words ‘sit down, rest’ as something to follow since they are tired. Hannah takes politeness first.

Lee Sooman sits down in the sofa after picking up Ace in the blanket, sitting there with the cat in his arms while talking about the concert; he has questions and advice, wise compliments that he gives to the ladies. He praises them equally to the advice, and he really wants to hear their own opinions about it. Hannah can only think about Ace sleeping in his arms. Members of SHINee enters the room too; Minho had joined Onew and Jonghyun right before the concert began, and he makes Lee Sooman smile because Maria’s eyes get huge and she calls Minho some strange nickname that Lee Sooman really seem to like.

Hannah is almost staring at Jonghyun from the moment he walks inside the room. Did she see him before the concert? She thinks she remembers his outfit, but a part of her can’t remember meeting him before the concert begun and she is just longing to kiss him. These thoughts need to be controlled, even if her already warm body from the concert heats up by that mesmerizing smile he gives her. Jonghyun notices nothing when he walks up to her, not shy in front of Lee Sooman at all to take a hold of Hannah’s hand to peck his lips at the back of her hand, and he compliments her by saying she is the reason the concert was perfect.

Who says that?

She almost rolls her eyes at the words he tells her, because she is not in need for a charmer; she just wants him. Always. But she doesn’t roll her eyes; instead she smiles and looks up at him from her seat, not knowing what to say. No one is taking notice of them (Lee Sooman is letting Minho and Onew giving their own report about the concert) and Jonghyun joins in on the report after exchanging a few seconds gazing with Hannah. She turns away when he joins in the conversation to compliment and judge 5 Pieces’ concert, she is trying to relax and calm her mind from the concert.

Members of Super Junior come too, and there are a lot of other idols and celebrities making their appearances to show that they watched the concert and support the ladies.

It takes a long time before Hannah is in the apartment with her ladies. Tonight it is just go straight to bed and sleep for tomorrow’s concert, while after tomorrow they will get to celebrate. Not until now when she lies down in her bed, Hannah thinks about her mother, her day at rehearsals messing up because of her. Within seconds she is crying the tears her body has suppressed during the concert. Quietly she is lying there, crying for herself.

No family. She has no family, no home to go back to. She doesn’t care about what her mother said to her, she only cares that her mother said such things – she can handle antis telling her all kind of things, but if her own mother says the same things… How is she supposed to react? What should she say and do? Though she keeps thinking that she doesn’t care, she is too tired to care about her family, but truth is that she is heartbroken by her family. They have hurt her, like Kelly Clarkson sings in [Because of You] *my heart can’t possibly break, when it wasn’t even whole to start with* - Hannah links to that all the time. She has always missed something in her life; love, affection, passion, a little touch or a little sign of trust and love. She grew up without it, and then she comes to Korea; a country where she is overwhelmed by all the things she grew up without suddenly surrounding her. All the fans showing their love through passion to 5 Pieces and their music and everything they do; it can be too much at times, but Hannah is amazed to just hear one person say “I like your song”. Hannah grew up with laughter around her, her family saying “where to start with the mistakes?” It is a completely different world here; that she has been able to live for five years without completely breaking down. She has felt she has stood on the edge for a long time of going crazy or insane or somehow making everyone realise she can not take this life, but even with her times of showing this craziness in different ways, no one notices how deep it goes. People around her worry about her body, as if she will fall down and never get back up – it can happen, the doctor is on guard all the time for it. But Hannah doesn’t worry about that. She is worried about everything else.

She can’t even remember the last time she met her family; her graduation! She can’t remember it. Why? Because her mind is spooky, it plays games with her all the time, letting her forget things that have happened, words or mix up things. Even now, when her mind is going crazy of all these thoughts she has no idea of what language she is using in her head. She can’t sort it out even if she understands fluently what she is thinking, and it is making her go insane. Why are there so many mixed languages in her head?

Hannah sits up straight in her bed, panicked.

How do I know Japanese?

One question, it is just one question and she is crying out of panic to not remember how she can know a language she barely gave a thought to as a child.

And why would I learn just Japanese?

Hannah wipes her tears in her childish way, the back of her hands get wet from her try to wipe so she can see anything. And she gets up from her bed to turn on the lamp by the door, then she turns it off before pulling on a sweater and she heads out of her room, stopping her steps to look at the doors around her. Carolina is sleeping… Maria is sleeping… Julia’s lamp is still on. Hannah walks over to the door to sneak a peek inside, seeing Julia lying in bed. She has fallen asleep with the nightstand lamp on. Upset that everyone is sleeping (they are probably exhausted from the concert) Hannah walks inside to quietly turn the lamp off, and she walks back to her own room.

Sitting down on the bed, Hannah hugs the quilt with just her hand, staring out at nothing. She has no idea of what she was going to do if someone was awake.

Julia had on the way back to the apartment revealed that she felt very emotional during the concert because she has realized they have spent five years in Korea. It was hard to believe for her, and she was missing her mother while enjoying the concert. “This is our best concert ever, and I’m happy we are doing this”, Julia had said in the van. She has been weird all day with her emotional speeches and comments, but the ladies understand her. This is a life they thought was impossible, something unreachable in all ways and dimensions; now they are living it.

“I’m happy for them,” Hannah mumbles for herself, sadly looking down at her hands. “They haven’t lost anything; they are living their dreams here while having families proudly waiting in Sweden to catch a hug during their short visits home.”

Home…

With a whine she cries some more, falling down in her bed with her head right below her pillows.

For minutes she cries, just crying with no end, all the feelings she has held inside during the day comes out again. She thinks about how she was teary during the concert, but she not once had the single thought of that she was going to start crying; not the way she can’t hold back the tears now. She was excited, happy, overwhelmed by the whole concert earlier, when they were performing and the audience was singing along or screaming… Usually she would want to cry out of happiness at that point, but it was like someone else’s body; no tears wanted to leak out, no face-expression wanted to show how deeply thankful she is to be saved by all these people just by them loving 5 Pieces on the stage. She was weird at the concert even if no one else noticed it; damn, not even she noticed it during the actual concert. She was too busy having a blast, but now when thinking back she can not believe she stood out with Julia crying, the fans crying, just everything – she can’t believe how she pulled it off.

Tomorrow is the second concert, the last in Seoul before they take off to who-knows-where. Hannah breathes out when she thinks about it. After the concert today she had asked Jonghyun if he will come tomorrow too; he said he can’t come to the concert but he will try to come to the after party.

To celebrate the opening concert they are all having a party after the concert; of course, it is almost a must to have one after a concert. Hannah doesn’t feel to go though, but she doesn’t have a choice; everyone from the concert is going. If it isn’t to bond with the staff it is to drink and have fun with others, to forget the fatigue from the concert and warm up for next week’s concert in China. Maybe she can just drink her way through the night; like a light-bulb she comes up with the idea that she can drink so much that she throws up. Maybe she can throw up all the emotions she has inside of her, that are messing up her life. Hannah decides it; she will drink until she throws up at tomorrow’s after party, as if that will help her to not feel filled with emotions and tears and the loss of her family. Drown her sorrows with alcohol… She has never tried that before.

All of a sudden she is looking forward to the after party, and with those thoughts, Hannah drifts in to sleep.

 

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Day two is hectic. Rather than focusing on rehearsals, they are going through yesterday’s concert to make sure everyone is alright with how they do it; a few changes maybe, and then the ladies get on in their opening outfits early to do a lot of interviews and talk about yesterday’s concert, today’s concert, the future concert’s, their expectations and thoughts… It is an endless row of interviews and Hannah thinks she is just spacing out at whoever is interviewing them all the time.

She is exhausted already, but she looks forward to do the concert again; it is just all the extra things around she is tired of. But she does her best because she has already too much headlines lately, she can’t afford being seen as someone rude.

“Got any nasty idea of how to make Carolina cry today?” Maria asks when joining up next to Hannah in the corridor, one of the female dancers standing there with them too.

“You’re still going on about that?” the dancer giggles cutely and Hannah smiles too, not glancing at the cameras filming for Life of Pieces today too.

“Of course! As the captain I’m supposed to make our fans satisfied with what we are giving, and at the moment our fans want to see Carolina cry – I want to see her cry too – but I don’t know how to accomplish that other than hurting her,” Maria answers; the diva has come up with several ideas of how to make Carolina cry, but all of them ends with Carolina getting hurt. Emelia only had those kind of ideas too…

“Just pinch her when no one is looking,” Hannah shrugs her shoulders and she laughs behind her hands when the dancer says she is being influenced too much by the evil ladies.

“That’s actually good… We could all like walk by her on stage and pinch her one by one endlessly until she is crying,” Maria says with her eyes going off to the imagination of everyone on the stage walking by Carolina in a row to pinch her on the arm until she cries. Hannah and the dancer looks at Maria with raised eyebrows. No way is that going to happen, not after they have seen Maria’s face-expression anyway.

“It’s a good thing Hannah isn’t as evil as you,” the dancer jokes and she laughs when Maria wants to kick her. It is actually good; just imagine all the crazy things 5 Pieces would do if Hannah was as evil as Maria, or Emelia. There wouldn’t be a single quiet moment backstage; well… not because it is now.

“Ladies!” male dancer Shiwon calls out down the corridor and he is shining up when everyone turns to look at him, and right away he begins to dance and sing to [Daze], blocking the corridor so the staff behind him gets confused whether to try find another way or wait to pass by.

Further way behind him, Emelia and another dancer are laughing when seeing him make a fool of himself. The dancers always make people dance. Maria laughs the loudest, maybe overdoing it a bit as she sits down on her heels out of laughter before she starts to dance randomly to the song that she is not helping out to sing to.

Hannah glances at the female dancer and the camera filming her, muttering out of embarrassment that she does not know those people making fools of them in the corridor, and she sneaks away before anyone can tell her to join in the singing if she isn’t going to dance. But its good they can entertain themselves a bit backstage, though Hannah knows it is just a warm-up for the stage. She thinks of what they might do to Carolina on stage later; pretty sure everyone is in on the idea of teasing her today after that Maria has walked around asking for suggestions of how to make her cry.

And Hannah is right. Everyone wants to join in to make Carolina today’s victim during the concert. It isn’t until Act 5 it happens though, when 5 Pieces finishes performing a dance remix of [Once Upon A Time] and [Switch] after opening the act with [WHO-I AM]. Beginning to perform [Original], Hannah almost burst out laughing when spotting one of the dancers poke Carolina on her back one- two times. And another dancer who saw that takes the next chance to poke Carolina at the back of the head, as she didn’t seem to care about the first two times. This time Carolina turns around when she can, looking questioning at Emelia who just in that moment slinks by behind her in the choreography. Like a witness to it all, Hannah smiles when singing the chorus. Poor Carolina.

She is clueless during the talk after [Original] too, but the song beginning after that is [Deeper] – a rock-ish song from their album and the performance is just of 5 Pieces going insane; they have pulled on leather jackets in different colours and styles to match each member on top of the tank top and baggy pants that are showing the briefer edge. For this song it really begins.

Carolina jumps so much during the first chorus that she falls down on her , and she sits there with a smile before she begins to sing her part, not aware at all that Emelia comes running up behind her, grabs her shoulders to pull her down on her back. Carolina screams at first in surprise but then lies there laughing at Emelia trying to take her shoe. Julia comes running when spotting them, holding Carolina down when the friend wants to sit up to keep her shoes on – Emelia takes one shoe off before she drops it next to them to walk off as if nothing happened, rapping a bit. Julia notices her leaving, confused by it, but she gets up to leave too. Carolina breathes out with her eyes looking out at the fans next to the stage that have been shouting loudly at the fun, confused with why they had to take off her shoe. And when she is putting on the shoe, fans start to scream wilder around her and this time Carolina think she is fast to react, but before she manages to turn around to catch the person before something happens, Hannah is resting her knees on her back and brightly singing out to the music. Carolina is relieved it is just Hannah, because the youngest doesn’t push you down or takes off your shoes; Hannah squats down behind Carolina to puts her arms around her friend’s neck in a rare hug, which not just the fans are happy about but Carolina looks like she is going to shine up like the sun of the rare moment.

Meanwhile, something has appeared on the middle stage. Coming up on the lift in the middle is a sort of throne kind of chair, with a high backrest and decorated to fit a king or queen. Fans are screaming all over the arena when Emelia stands on top of it (yes, she stands up on the seat with one foot on the armrest) and holds on to the backrest when she begins head-banging wildly and dancing along to Maria’s voice rocking the song. It happened yesterday too, as they practiced during rehearsals.

Towards the end of the song all five ladies are by the throne. The song ends charismatically with Maria sitting like the captain on the throne; Julia standing on the armrest and resting her arms on the backrest that is high enough for her to do so: Emelia is sitting on the floor with her legs lying over the side; Hannah rests her against the other armrest, leaning her head back and showing off her s-line and Carolina is standing on the other side. The whole arena is shouting loudly at the charismatic ending.

They perform [-erase you-] without any pranks on Carolina before they head backstage to change clothes and for Act 6 to begin.

This act is special, because it is called ‘Puzzle’. It is a fun video intro of 5 Pieces running around searching for certain pieces of a puzzle, like a game where they have to find the pieces from a map and it is a really fun video that makes the fans laugh in the audience because the ladies keep charming with cute and charming face-expressions, and even with Maria hitting Carolina’s head cutely when the mascot made a mistake the audience is laughing and saying they are adorable. It is a very cute video. Happily they go around the puzzle, cheering among each other as they think it is finished but they get disappointed when seeing the important centre part of the puzzle is missing. With fun sound, Emelia points at the camera, pointing out at the audience and the ladies all smile widely when running by the camera, as if coming towards the audience. The camera zooms in on the puzzle now when 5 Pieces have left the video, and the puzzle only now reveals how it actually looks; a colourful drawing of 5 Pieces on the stage, each member had picked her own piece during the game and the only thing missing is the audience.

There are six parts of the screen divided like a puzzle, and on five of them, 5 Pieces on the stage are filmed, one personal for each member. And the sixth one in the middle is live filming their audience, which screams loudly at the whole thing.

Emelia’s voice is clearly heard saying; “We have been together for five years already. During this time we have shared a lot of first times and moments, we have cried and laughed together, making fools of ourselves as well.”

A quiet audience is now listening, with Carolina continuing; “We still remember our very first time performing in front of a live audience in Seoul; we hadn’t made our official debut yet as 5 Pieces, but the first time is always different. For an audition we had crossed the globe to show our idols that culture and languages can’t stop music, and for that audition we got to witness you showing us that culture and languages can’t stop music as well.”

Hannah’s voice is heard; “Today is a first time as well. Today, we mark our fifth year with our tour BLACK & WHITE, starting here in Seoul where we five years ago started this career.”

“Our fans have been with us all this time, you have watched us grow, even helping us grow, and we have watched you do the same. Thanks to all of you, 5 Pieces have come this far to celebrate our fifth year, and still we can only say his is the beginning,” Julia continues.

Maria’s voice says; “You taught us a lot of things we did not know when we started. We want to become better and better thanks to all of our fans, to become a 5 Pieces you can proudly listen to in all weathers. As 5 Pieces, we want to entertain you; we want to show that nothing is impossible and that music has no limit whether you are from different countries and religions and speak different languages. As part of the same puzzle, all pieces together for this night, we can share a world that is not black and white.”

Emelia speaks through the microphone, a satisfied look in her face as her voice goes out to the audience; “We thank you; for today, for tomorrow, and for yesterday, and for staying as pure as the diamond you are, being pieces of a puzzle in our hearts.”

The ladies all bows, staying with their backs bent for several seconds before the lights blinks and [Diamond] begins to play. Dancers join them on the main stage, but the ladies don’t dance with them but instead focuses on singing and playing on the stage with their fans.

For this act they are dressed pretty casual actually. Different t-shirts or tops; Maria is wearing a pair of yellow skinny jeans, Emelia a pair of simple distressed jeans, Carolina a pair of washed jeans, Julia regular jeans and Hannah a pair of black skinny jeans. And this is where Hannah thinks everyone is going too far for poor Carolina.

First on the main stage, the dancers are fooling around behind Carolina so only the audience is seeing it. And then throughout the song the ladies are overdoing their skin contact with her by running up next to her; link arms, get a little too close, smile widely at her, Maria gets up right in front of Carolina when Carolina is singing to by singing loudly in front of her microphone so Maria’s voice is heard during Carolina’s part, through Carolina’s microphone. Even Hannah keeps fooling around with Carolina when walking up to stand next to her, by putting up two fingers behind Carolina’s head and she smiles to the audience that sees everything. Carolina can not stop being confused for the whole song, noticing that everyone is a little too close to her but not noticing the small details in the jokes.

“Can you guys repeat after me?” Maria asks in the microphone to the audience when the song has ended; “*I am strong*”

She reaches out the microphone to the audience, the other members doing it too.

*I am strong* the audience happily repeats in the same tone, though they cheer as well as they know what song it is by the words and the way they say it.

“A little louder, could you? Again; *I am strong!*”

*I am strong!*

“Yeah! That’s it,” Carolina laughs and Maria says; “Again now; *I am strong!*”

*I am strong!* the audience repeats

“Woh!” Hannah cheers in the microphone before all ladies sing; *I am strong*

The audience repeats again; *I am strong!*

*I am strong!*

*I am strong!*

*I wanna be like me

If I am lacking in something,

If I am unsure in something*

The audience started to scream loudly when the ladies continued to sing with the simple instrumental in the background after the audience repeated, and the girls are waving their hands while singing.

*I am me, the one I wanna be

I am me, the one I wanna be*

“Do you all know this song? Sing it for us!” Carolina calls out and she helps the audience to continue singing with *confidently walk forward, step after step* before she reaches out her microphone to the audience whose voice can be heard singing;

*Confidently throw your hair around

Don’t forget to keep your head up high

If you wanna be me!*

“Yeah!”

*(Wanna, wanna, wanna, wanna, wanna, wanna, wanna, wanna)

[Carolina] I wanna be

(Wanna, wanna, wanna, wanna, wanna, wanna, wanna, wanna)*

Julia steps forward to the side, singing along with the audience.

*Isn’t this me? The person I see?

I finally got it, I know who I wanna be

I wanna be me*

“Sing it louder now!”

Hannah loves how the members get the audience to sing loudly with them to the song.

[CHORUS] *I am strong, I wanna be like me

If I am lacking in something,

If I am unsure in something

I am me, the one I wanna be

I am me, the one I wanna be*

 

[Chorus] *O-Oh, it’s okay, don’t be sad

Days are always up and down

But what would life otherwise be?*

They go through the whole song, the ladies brightly performing with their audience that has been just as amazing as yesterday’s. When the song ends, Carolina shouts “You are great!” to the audience right before Emelia evilly pushes her a bit from behind, grimacing playfully when Carolina turns around. The ladies take the positions for the next song; [Oppa]. That is hilarious. While 5 Pieces are being cute and playful, they just can’t help but to mess with Carolina, who is first not noticing anything; not even when Maria sings Carolina’s part, Carolina doesn’t notice anything.

They are so mean to her!

But Carolina doesn’t cry or get upset, and they finish the whole concert without any solution. Not until then, they explain to Carolina what was going on, as she is completely clueless of what was going on.

“I thought you were annoyed with me,” Carolina sounds surprised at the confession and she points at the dancer by the door. “You were on it too?!”

“They were on you all the time,” Emelia chuckles with a smile, pointing at the dancer. The dancers really didn’t leave Carolina alone when they were on stage. But Emelia was still worst, somehow, and Carolina does mention that, which makes the others laugh. She noticed more things than they thought, she just didn’t understand it and let it pass. Hannah would have gotten furious and annoyed if anyone did that to her; but Carolina laughs when she is explained the joke. How can she get that?

Julia leans in towards Hannah.

“Did you see the wolf-boys?” she giggles. Hannah looks clueless. “EXO was sitting there in their stage outfits; I saw them throughout the whole concert; whenever we saw the fans, I mean. They looked hilarious. Like a full line of red-dressed boys … So silly.”

Hannah stays quiet; she didn’t see them. She hope she didn’t look at them without seeing them, or did something stupid where they could see. For some reason she is more embarrassed when knowing other idols are there; of course, yesterday it was a lot of idols and celebrities in the audience, some coming before and after to greet 5 Pieces backstage – which will happen today too – but when it is someone she will meet or knows other than formal visits like this, she gets embarrassed and thinks about what she does. She doesn’t know why.

The group does the usual things backstage, including having celebrity visits to take pictures and what-not. Honestly, Hannah just waits for them to go to the after-party to drink. She has thought about it a lot; drink until you throw up. That is her plan. A stupid plan and probably pointless but she got the idea once and it won’t leave her head until she has done it, and beside, she can mentally trick herself that her family in Sweden will disappear if she throws everything up. Either way, she gets prepared backstage with her ladies to go straight to the party where everyone will go. Even EXO will come; they had showed up backstage in their wine-red outfits and all of them have been invited to the party.

Hannah dresses up in a black gathered-waist lace tank dress that surely is short but she has no say in it as it was Yong Hyun and Maria who picked it out. Maria got the idea to decide what the ladies will wear for the party; meaning most of them are wearing dresses and high heels. Hannah’s heels are killing; faux leather high-heel sandals. They are read and astonishing and Hannah kept looking in the mirror at them. She has to admit; they are hot. The black dress and red heels, she looks really nice, and the make-up has been freshened up for the party.

When everyone is ready to leave, 5 Pieces get in the van – the few meters from the door to the van they spend waving to the fans further away who have waited for them – and Hannah sits down in the back with a blanket over her legs because of the short dress. She is waiting to get a drink, to get several drinks…

“Appa, can we stay out late?” Julia asks from the back where she is sitting with Hannah.

“Define late…” he sounds like it is a bad word, and Hannah wonders what time they will come home.

“I would definitely say ‘early’ rather than ‘late’,” Maria starts to say in her diva tone, “Because we will come back in the morning-”

“You all will be home by four,” Manager Lim is fast to say, “and if I can decide, I would say at three.”

“Then five it is,” Maria shines up. She is excited to take on the dance-floor wherever they will go, already beginning to talk about last times they had these kind of after parties and she would get all sweaty dancing with some of the dancers. Maria isn’t the best dancer on stage, but on the dance-floor she is someone you easily and always take notice of.

Hannah pouts for herself in the back. She doesn’t feel like dancing, especially not with the eager captain who can’t drop the subject. Hannah just wants to drink. Next to her, Julia says she will try to challenge a bartender with some sweet drinks. If Julia will be at the bar – Hannah knows Emelia will be there too – where can Hannah be then? It’s not like her members will let her get drunk… Not when she is taking pills.

For q second her mind is blank. Pills. She hadn’t wanted to think about that; what could happen if you mix pills with alcohol? She has been told to not drink then what would happen if she drinks a lot? Hannah had taken the pill for the evening, because she knows it doesn’t turn out well if she doesn’t take it. Maybe just hope for the best…

 

Some time after finishing all the formalities with all of the people at the after party – mostly staff and the crew but some people from SM and idols are also there – Hannah has found the bar where Emelia is already sitting on the side and chatting with one of the bartenders and some staff. All of them had gotten a drink when arriving, which Hannah quietly sweep down without any issues and she pretends she didn’t get one to begin with, getting another one when mingling around with her members.

It started off well for her and has only kept going.

With a glance towards Emelia, the youngest orders a drink. She doesn’t know what she likes or the name of anything, she just asks for a drink – “surprise me”, she told the bartender – and when he asked about the alcohol level she took of course the highest. She doesn’t have all night to go get sick, she has waited too long and she is restless to throw up. She is weird. Hannah tastes the drink, waiting by the bar for a while to finish it before she orders two new; she lies to the bartender too by ordering two instead of one new, as if she is bringing it for a friend, because when she gets the two new drinks she takes them and head off.

She has already been drinking enough to feel off the alcohol, and she does her best to head out with the drinks without having anyone knock her over. Only once she is stopped, though she can’t recognize the person, she smiles and thanks for the compliment she gets for her outfit. The drunk part of her wants to say they should thank her stylist, but that part isn’t big so instead she thanks and continues to walk.

The goal for her is the bathroom. She finds it because it is right around the corner outside some back door to where the after party is held. Before walking through the bathroom door she sweeps down one of the drinks and grimaces because of the taste. It didn’t taste good the first time she tried it, why would it taste different the second time?

But she doesn’t feel that ill just yet. Just a weird feeling of having the alcohol stuck in . She slinks through the door, pushing it open with her hip after touching the doorknob.

There are toilet booths on the left side, four of them, and then washbasins on the right, a line of them made of stone. It looks really good and clean in here. Hannah puts down the empty glass on her right, glancing at the toilet booths. They look empty- Not one of them, but the person who comes out from it makes Hannah smile.

“y Kai,” she says when eyeing the tall slim Korean idol from top to toe. He surely looks like a model, wearing dark jeans and a t-shirt, and his face is always handsome. Just now, she sees, he looks to be in a shock the way his eyes widens and lips part, and he stops right outside the booth door.

“… What are you doing here? It’s the guys’ bathroom…” he breathes when collecting his thoughts from seeing this blonde girl dressed in red and black stand in the bathroom – the guys’ bathroom.

“Oh…” Hannah turns around to look at the door. She didn’t know it was the guys’ bathroom, and he sees that on her. With a shrug on the shoulder she turns back to Kai, smiling anew at him. “I wanted some time alone, so only if you could keep quiet tham here…”

Kai frowns a bit, thinking that she has been drinking a bit because she is mumbling on her words at the end. “Sure…” he says though. It is quite fascinating to see her drink; he doesn’t really get the chance to see that. He washes his hands while seeing Hannah drink from her glass.

“I thought you weren’t supposed to drink,” he mentions, a faint memory of hearing that she doesn’t drink because of the pills she has to take.

“At times, yes,” Hannah shrugs her shoulder. She keeps eyeing him. He looks really good. He looks handsome and hot, like a chocolate candy you just want to take a bite off but you can’t reach it because of some fence between you. Hannah doesn’t mind the fence though; she is satisfied to watch – eye-candy. She drinks a little more, pouting when finishing the drink. Kai is looking at her, as if he expects her to say something or he is trying to figure out something more to say. Hannah rests her hand on the washbasin, leaning against it when trying to focus her eyes on Kai. “Could you do me a small favour?”

“Anything, sure, of course,” Kai answers while nodding, standing ready to do anything for her.

Hannah turns her head on the side, lifting up her glass. “Could you get me more?”

“A drink…?”

“Two – as many as you can hold. And bring them here for me,” she explains, finding it the best solution to avoid eyes.

“Why don’t you get them yourself…?” Kai is confused.

“Emelia is sitting by the bar,” Hannah sighs, not liking that Emelia always have to sit by the bar. “She can drink how much she wants, but she glares the moment she sees me with a drink. Can you do it, please?”

With a nod he takes the old glass in her hand (not knowing the one on the side is hers too) and she smiles when he leaves the bathroom. That was easy, Hannah feel amazed by herself and she turns to her right to see her mirror-reflection. Right away she grimaces and turns away, not liking the reflection she saw. But she is in the boys’ bathroom … what if someone else comes?

 

Kai returns a few minutes later with two new drinks, but the bathroom is empty.

“Nuna?” he asks, confused when peeking outside again. Where is she?

“Who is it…?”

Kai looks back in the room, over at the booths. “Um… it’s Jongin,” he answers and comes inside, seeing that the one furthest in has a pair of y red high-heel with the owner.

“Oh, y Kai,” Hannah shines up and opens the door, right away spotting what he has in his hands. “Nice!”

He got no idea of why she calls him that, but he gives her the drinks, hesitating on the second one though.

“Do you need something else?” he asks her, planning on going back before Suho calls him missing.

Hannah purses her lips when eyeing him again, her eyes small. “Could you go another round?”

“Another round?” Kai looks and sounds confused, not knowing at all what she means.

“Get me two more drinks?”

Speechless, he has no idea of what to respond to that. Is she planning on drinking it all by herself? Here? In the guys’ bathroom? He wants to ask if something has happened, but he is both younger and her junior, and he does not wish to get on her bad side (whether she is drunk or not), so he stays quiet, quietly thinking of what to do.

“Just two more, pretty, pretty please,” Hannah asks with her eyelashes flirting with him.

“Sure…” Kai says with more hesitation, and this time he leaves without any glasses.

Hannah smiles and closes the door to the toilet booth. She drinks one of the drinks quickly with a grimace, finally feeling something in her stomach. Her feet hurts badly, so she steps outside to grab a magazine to spread out on the floor next to the toilet in the booth, and she sits down carefully to not anyway ruin the high heels. There she finishes the other drink, and then, quietly, waiting for Kai to return with the new ones.

It takes time… Hannah is playing her fingers restlessly on her bare legs, trying to figure out if she will have to throw up or not. She wants to, and she knows she can by the horrible feeling in her stomach, but even if she has prepared with the toilet-lid up, nothing comes.

And then she hears the door to the bathroom and shines up, trying to see under the booth’s door at the feet to see if it is Kai or not, but she doesn’t move her body an inch from where she is sitting so she only spots the shoes when they stop outside her booth.

“Nuna?”

She smiles at his voice and leans forward to push the door open for him, smiling widely when getting the drinks, thanking him when she holds them in each hand. She looks back up at him and is just about to say something when spotting someone else in the room, angry eyes looking at her and Hannah panics; she sweeps the first drink right away to not have it taken away.

 

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Headline 20th: 5 Pieces Kicks Off 2^nd Concert Tour BLACK & WHITE In Seoul For Over 15.000 People

Headline 20th: 5 Pieces’ [WHO-I AM] Full MV Revealed At Seoul Concert

 

Headline 21st: Idol Couple Jonghyun & Hannah Make Fans Swoon Over Their Sweet Moment Before 5 Pieces’ Concert Yesterday

Headline 21st: 5 Pieces Receives Only Praise After Opening Concert BLACK & WHITE In Seoul

Headline 21st: Puzzle Break Record By Trending ‘BLACK & WHITE Seoul’ On Twitter For 4 Days!

Headline 21st: 5 Pieces Outtakes Today’s Idol Groups With Full Live Concert

Headline 21st: 5 Pieces Succeeds As Artists Rather Than Being Idols

Headline 21st: A Successful Opening Of 5 Pieces’ BLACK & WHITE Tour In Seoul

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Woot, who could it be?? Any guesses? ;)

X. devonalias