It’s been two days and you still haven’t seen your parents faces, you don’t really mind anymore, it’s not like being left alone isn’t enjoyable.  Of all the times your elder brother got in trouble; for smoking, for drinking, for not coming home one day. You’ve never done any of those things. You were being punished for going out for your birthday and trying to have some fun, maybe you should smoke or drink you thought to yourself.… You felt like you needed a break, leave this house, maybe go to a friends or something. Maybe you should act improper; show them what it actually means to not raise you right. You’ve done nothing wrong to deserve this and you were going insane accepting this so called silent treatment.

Sadness, anger, desperation and feeling tired. All the feelings have blurred into one, you needed a purpose so badly right now. You need something, need someone. Yet you can’t open up, you can’t tell anyone how pathetic you are right now. Bang Yong Guk, The person you want to talk to the most, but every time you do, you feel like you’re letting him down. You didn’t know what to do about Bang Yong Guk, you wanted him to forget you but the feeling of being wanted, he’s the one that gives it to you. The thought that you like him so incredibly much, so soon, frightens you. You’re scared this will carry on, you’re scared that somewhere along the line you might fall in love with him and that leads you to think about what will happen when he leaves you. You’re scared that you won’t be able to cope, no matter how much of a strong person you are, Because that’s what always happens right? There’s an end to every beginning.

• [Insert name here]: Don’t know if you’re there but look, it’s a cute bat!
• Bang Yong Guk: Heyyyyyy :D
• Bang Yong Guk: No I was never home, if I was you think I wouldn’t be talking to you? :S
• [Insert name here]: Irrelevant. But Hey :)
• Bang Yong Guk: Wait how are you online again?
• [Insert name here]: Because I don’t give a . That’s how.
• Bang Yong Guk: Lol, What device are you using?
• [Insert name here]:  A thing called my laptop -___-
• Bang Yong Guk: Okay, attitude to the level of your height please (:
• [Insert name here]: Yes Sir.

Since your parents were out, there was no reason to not speak to Bang, There was no way you couldn’t not speak to him and you’d find a way even if you had to cross Mt Everest. As soon as you both spoke normally again, you feltrelaxed, all your worries left you as he continued to make you laugh with his ridiculous thoughts about the most random things, you also remembered to ask him about why he was so distant yesterday, not trying to make to to evident that you cared. The answer he gave you was “Because I like you, I’ll act stupid” You blushed to yourself thinking what a weirdo, he didn't have to say it like that. When he spoke so comfortabley it was clear that things had changed between you too, it was a change for the better but still left you worrisome and anxious at anything. Having feelings were extremely troublesome, no matter how happy it made you, he could easily hurt you know without even trying.

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Your parents eventually got over it after of course giving you a lecture but of course you still weren't allow out, you haven't seen bang for atleast 2 weeks now. It seems the long distance was making you act nicer towards him, through the phone atleast and internet at least. The more days that wen't by, the more your need for him got stronger, it was hard not to see him, as if being apart slowly made you dissapear and you found when you weren't talking to him, everything hurt that much more. Late that night you were on strike again for some silly reason just to annoy Bang, he was insulting your kpop again and you decided to teach him a lesson byb elongating your strike. However this time you got extremely annoyed and upset, it was the first time you understood the extent of your feelings. Somehow through the jokes you threatened to delete Bang off of facebook as he was irritating you but he took it to another level. Apparently this Nicole girl Zelo used to bully you about was real, Bang decided to get back at you by sending you her profile pictures and says "Nicole > You" and when you saw them, you got slightly upset, she really was cute and despite her being younger then you it made you angry. Bullying you about Nicole was Zelo's thing, it annoyed you enough when he did it but for Bang to do it too? That caused your temper to rile up. It was almost a private joke that Zelo would do but Bang doing it, it was completely different, you were feeling something you never felt before and it made you feel horrible inside.

•  Bang Yong Guk: Do it then.
• [Insert Your name here] : I never said I was doing anything unless it was asked off me..
• Bang Yong Guk: Good girl. Now how are you?
• [Insert Your name here:] Bad
• Bang Yong Guk: Why bad?
• [Insert Your name here] : Cause you out of all people did the thing I hate the most. Actually sending me pictures, Really?
• Bang Yong Guk: I just wanted to test it.
• [Insert Your name here:] test what?
•  Bang Yong Guk: Your Reaction.
• [Insert Your name here] : Why does my reaction need testing?
• Bang Yong Guk: Because
• [Insert Your name here:] ....
•  Bang Yong Guk: I don't know. To see if you cared
• [Insert Your name here] : Why does that even matter.
• Bang Yong Guk: Because do you even care?
• [Insert Your name here:] With Zelo yes, with you it's a different story.
•  Bang Yong Guk: So your allowed to get annoyed over 2 pictures of Nicole but I can't  get annoyed over the 1000000 dudes?
• [Insert Your name here] : lol? How are kpop male idols even similar to a real person? Zelo never took it as far to send me anything.
• Bang Yong Guk: Not just that, anything surrounding other dudes, you and all your male 'friends' and even so I've never had your reaction and i'm supposed to be the jealous one.
• [Insert Your name here:] Never have my reaction? Coming from the one who got upset with me calling Himchan my son.This reaction is what happens when Nicole is involved, i'm tired of hearing that name.
•  Bang Yong Guk: I thought you weren't a jealous person.
• [Insert Your name here] : I'm not, I'm a angry person. Plus I have no reason to be jealous. After all
• [Insert Your name here] : Your just my friend.
• Bang Yong Guk: You seem to be jealous when Zelo does it.
   

You refused to speak to him any longer for now. You knew it  was horrible what you said to him, that he's just your friend, you knew that was something you shouldn't have said but it wasn't fair. You felt hurt, hearing the Nicole thing from Bang was 100x worse then when Zelo bullied you, it was as if he held the sharpest Knife in the world and stabbed you with it. This must mean you really do like him, you thought to yourself, getting more and more upset. Saying what you said really was a lowblow and it didn't help make you feel better at all. You really hope you didn't hurt his feelings. You threw your phone aside and felt your eyes get teary, your mind was just racing through thoughts. Would it be like this everytime he said something even slightly hurtfull? Would you always be this sensitive because it really .

It was hard to tell how long you were thinking for but it seems somewhere along the line you fell asleep, after all it was really late. However you had woken up to your phone buzzing harshly, you looked at the screen blinding yourself in the process. You had recieved several texts from Bang in a attempt to wake you up. That was normal but what wasn't was : "Look outside your window" you read with your squinted eyes. It was hours passed midnight,What is wrong with that boy you thought as you got out of bed with your aching heart and obediently did as he asked. You pulled back the curtains and blinked at what you saw. There was a hooded figuire outside in the dark practically staring into your soul, it was only after having scared yourself that you realised it was Bang. You almost screamed at your realisation. Why was he here you thought to yourself as your heart beated in anticipation and excitement. He signalled for you to open the window, you did so wordlessly watching him climb into your room. You heard the softest thud as his feet made contact with the floor. Amazed as his hood fell unmasking his beautiful face that was made apparent in the moonlight. You stared up at him, not believing your eyes.

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Sorry for not uploading in so long, the weekend is all I get to write due to all my school work :'(