Chuseok passed really fast for Chaeyoung this year. She got to meet with her family, which was always refreshing and it gave her time to think and assimilate this past few weeks, not that there was much to figure out, but still. Unfortunately, Nayeon's birthday was on the same day, so they couldn't spend it together and that's why they decided to meet once they had returned from home so Chaeyoung could give Nayeon her present, but also catch up on things, which wasn't going as expected.

You see, Chaeyoung has always been kind. She cares for people, she cares for her friends, for her family, she would make you feel okay if you're feeling down, she would try and make a fool of herself just because someone might need it. She's patient and understanding. Many could say these qualities made her a pushover, but she knows what she is doing, really, that's why she gets upset when their own friends doubt her capacities. She is kind but not soft.

So, Nayeon has been really getting on her nerves. Why couldn't she just trust her? It's true Chaeyoung has been a little more than just kind to her new roommate but, hey, she has it under control. Besides, Nayeon doesn't know everything, she can't see the things Chaeyoung sees, she just knows what Chaeyoung can explain with words and that's not the full picture, there're some things that she can't explain. There are some things that just feel different. Deep down she knows Nayeon just wants the best for her, but she has the right to be annoyed.

"Chaeyoungie you told me yourself that there was something wrong with you," Nayeon insisted. They had been discussing the same thing for some time now. They had met outside but then decided to get coffee because it was too cold, so they were inside the same place she had encountered Mina and her friends.

"It was an impulsive decision, I shouldn't have texted you," Chaeyoung argued trying to explain for probably the fourth time that day. "I just felt-"

"Exactly, you felt, you shouldn't have felt, you shouldn't feel, not for her." Nayeon really disliked Mina.

"Nayeon, I know, it's not like that, we just get along now, for real this time." Chaeyoung had explained to her all about how they had fallen into this routine of ordering food, playing, and joking around. "I got carried away by the vibe of that night, okay? That text meant nothing, I'm perfectly fine."

"So you just want to be friends with her?" Nayeon questioned. "With the enemy."

"She is not the enemy, how many times do I have to tell you?"

"This is nonsense." Nayeon looked at the time, she had to meet with Jeongyeon later.

"What time are you leaving?" Chaeyoung asked.

"You're so dumb, I'd leave now."

"Okay, you're acting stupid."

"You're the one feeling things," Nayeon scoffed making a face.

"Okay then, if you're gonna be like this, I'm the one leaving."

"Great."

"Great." Chaeyoung stood up and was about to leave through the door when she remembered she had promised Mina some cake. '' Nayeon was gonna make fun of her if she realized. But she was not going to wait for Nayeon to leave, that wouldn't make sense, so she tried to play it cool. She turned around reaching for the counter, she knew Nayeon was looking at her but was not going to look at her. She asked for the piece of cake she wanted and paid, finally leaving. Once she was outside she felt her phone vibrate.

From Nayeon💙
is that for her?
don't answer.
i can feel it, your face gave it away.
stop feeling things, chaeyoung, youll get hurt

'c'mon Nayeon give me a break, I'm not feeling things'

Chaeyoung was really annoyed now. She got to her room in a bad mood. Quickly she left her things on her desk and went to the bathroom. Inside she allowed herself to breathe.

'She doesn't know everything' Chaeyoung thought looking at the mirror, her hair was getting longer. 'She's not always right'

Chaeyoung was upset. She trusted Nayeon too much, but she didn't want to hear was she was saying now. She only had said to the girl how she enjoyed spending time with her roommate, and how she had called her cute, making her feel nice. To which Nayeon had made a whole big deal of how Chaeyoung was feeling too much and how dangerous that was. But it wasn't.

'It's okay, Chaeyoung, she doesn't know everything about you' That was her final statement before splashing some water on her face and leaving the bathroom.

"You okay?" Mina asked.

'Right, Mina'

She had forgotten she was not alone, she grabbed the cake taking it out of the box, and handed it to the girl who was on her bed lying on her stomach.

"Here, your cake,” she answered ignoring the question.

Mina smiled and took it while sitting, supporting her back with the wall. "Sit here," she patted next to her, "eat with me."

A week had passed since they had first played video games together, Chaeyoung liked to think of that day as a before and after because they had removed the tape. Half of that week they spent it away from campus and the other half, even though Mina had been working on her project, they kept eating together or spending quiet comfortable silences in their room, where Mina would use Chaeyoung's Switch and Chaeyoung would paint or whatever she was supposed to be doing. Mina had been really nice in all that time, she thought that she was finally getting to know the real Mina. But it was still a surprise whenever she said things like this because Chaeyoung respected the girl's space too much.

That's why she hesitated before sitting next to her and Mina noticed

"It's okay,” she reassured Chaeyoung. "You have to stop getting surprised by everything I say, I can be nice, you know?"

"I don't doubt that," Chaeyoung explained, "It's just that-"

"I know," Mina cut her off. "It's on me."

They ate in silence, but their silences weren't awkward anymore, the problem was that in those silences, Chaeyoung felt funny.

'C'mon, Chaeyoung, think of Frozen, conceal, don't feel. Nayeon can't be right'

So she did the best next thing and broke it. "Did you do well with your project?"

"I'll know tomorrow."

Silence.

"How's the cake?"

"I rather eat the one with strawberries, but this one is tasty too," Mina explained. "Thank you, next time I'll bring something."

More silence. So Chaeyoung took one last bite before getting up.

"I have to finish this,” she said while walking towards her desk, pointing at her painting. "But it's losing its form."

"Why?" Mina got up too. She wasn't supposed to do that.

"It was supposed to be sunflowers but now I just can't see it, can you?"

Mina looked at it for a moment "I did see sunflowers," she hummed. "But it does have something different to it." She got closer to the desk. "It's still pretty, though," she added. "You should teach me."

'Teach her?'

"I don't think I could do that," Chaeyoung answered honestly.

"Why not?" Mina put on a sad face. "I want to paint."

Chaeyoung thought for a moment, it was a weird request but it seemed sincere.

"Mhh you can paint this one," she decided. "Here," she added looking for her brushes, she organized the acrylics across the table and turned to Mina. "Just try it."

"Oh," Mina apparently was not expecting a positive answer, or at least not right now. "Isn't this one for classes?"

"No, no," Chaeyoung explained. "Those are in another room along with the ones my classmates have done too," she smiled "This one is just for fun.” Chaeyoung was now invested. This was her area of expertise. "You should totally transform it" Chaeyoung was now encouraging Mina.

"What?" And Mina was now confused. "But you have been working on it."

"No, don't worry, I just do it for fun. I want to see what you can do now, you asked." She felt excited. "And if you don't like it, we can always paint over."

"Are you sure?"

"Positive."

Chaeyoung looked at Mina expectant. She had forgotten all about Nayeon or how she was supposed to be upset. She had forgotten how she wasn't supposed to feel.

"Okay, I'll try I guess." Mina eyed the material on the desk, reaching for a color and adding some to the overly used palette she then took one of the brushes and looked at Chaeyoung.

"Just do whatever." Chaeyoung saw the look of doubt in the girl. "You can even just throw it." She made a hand movement. “It can be relaxing when you're mad."

"I'm not mad," Mina complained "Teach me better."

"I never said I'd teach you," Chaeyoung clarified. "I'm just letting you paint, go on."

Mina was still hesitant, to which Chaeyoung was getting anxious so she took Mina's hand and just gave a quick brush to the canvas.

"There," said Chaeyoung leaving the hand.

Mina laughed "Okay, I get it."

So Mina kept giving brushes, more slowly than Chaeyoung had begun. The sunflowers were disappearing. Chaeyoung fixed her eyes on Mina's every movement. She saw her adding more colors and doubting how to grab the brush, but she didn't say anything, she was enjoying the silence.

Chaeyoung felt funny once again. But this time she didn't realize, she was too busy watching Mina's hand and then Mina's arm, and then Mina's neck, and Mina's face, and Mina's hair.

After some minutes Mina turned around, making Chaeyoung snap out of her trance, but in doing so she accidentally touched her face with the used brush, leaving a tiny mark on her cheek.

"Oh, you got paint there," Chaeyoung pointed at her, almost trying to clean it with her own hand but then stopped and looked for a baby wipe, giving one to Mina.

The girl took it and cleaned it right beneath where she was supposed to clean. "Thank you," she said.

"Uh, it's…" Chaeyoung remembered Mina's words about how it was okay to sit next to her, this must be okay too, so she reached for Mina's hand again, the one with the wipe, and actually cleaned the paint from her face, in a quick movement, but she left their hands there for more than a second. "There," She whispered removing her hand.

Silence.

Mina then cleared . "It's fun," she said. "I can continue tomorrow, or I don't know, you can transform it now." She put everything back on the table and left for the bathroom. Chaeyoung felt as if she left a little too fast, filling her mind with insecurities. Maybe she had overstepped.

'Don't overthink it, Chaeyoung, don't feel'

Yeah, she was feeling, alright. There was no point denying that.

Nayeon knows her too well.