'Oh god'

'Oh no'

'Why did I do that?!' 

Chaeyoung was freaking out. She was never the one to shout at people or fight. She knew she was going to argue with Mina but she had not expected to get so worked up and snapped like that. Yeah, Mina had made no sense and all but she did not have to shout those things. Chaeyoung was mad, yes, but she was also starting to regret everything. She knows how complicated Mina could get, she knows her mind works in mysterious ways, this was no news, but she still had let her emotions get the best of her and she felt awful. Mina needed to know she had been wrong, but not like that. 

Now outside her room, outside the dorms, in the cold, she felt embarrassed. She couldn't go back there, not after that. It wasn't night yet but it was darker now and more cloudy, rain was coming. So she started walking, without realizing she got to Nayeon's dorm, she was going to ask her if she could sleep there but then she remembered Momo. She could not face the girl because she had just abandoned her and Sana, that would be awkward, besides she had also just fought with her best friend, it would be weird to sleep there, there would be too many questions that she would not be able to answer. 

'Is there even a reasonable answer?' Mina's attitude didn't make sense. At all. Chaeyoung was so annoyed that she became sad. She did not like to feel like this. Leaving Nayeon's dorms she started walking towards Dahyun and Tzuyu's maybe there she would not have to say much. It's been a while since they got together, just the three of them. 

SCM🦅🐯🤡

From Chaeyoungie 🍓
r u in your room?

From Dahyun 🤍
Tzuyu is, i finish in a while 

From Tzuyu 🧡
what happened

From Chaeyoungie🍓
ok, ill be there in 5

This building was a bit farther away. She felt more messages but decided to ignore them, she could explain later. Walking slowly, she could feel the drizzle on her face but kept walking slowly, there was no point in rushing things. When she got to the room she knocked three times until Tzuyu opened the door. 

"You look like ." 

"Thanks, you look beautiful as always." Tzuyu let her in and she threw herself in one of the beds. 

"It's been a while since you've been here." Tzuyu sat next to her. "Are you okay?"

"I'm tired," Chaeyoung groaned. 

"Well, Dahyun would be here any minute now," Tzuyu explained. "We can eat then, although we only have ramen." 

"That's okay." Chaeyoung was not in the mood to complain about the food. "Anything would be fine, how are you?"

"I'm okay, you're the one that stormed into my room." 

"But it's been a while since we've talked." Chaeyoung felt like she had not been paying attention to her friends so she wanted to know about Tzuyu. "Did Sana text you?" The question seemed to make Tzuyu slightly uncomfortable but she answered anyway. 

"She did," and then added, "what do you think?" Chaeyoung thought it was an odd question.

"Of Sana?" Chaeyoung sat on the bed now. "Or of you two going out?" 

"Both." Tzuyu seemed really interested in Chaeyoung's answer so she gave it a minute before answering. 

"Well, Sana's pretty." Was all Chaeyoung could say, she did not exactly know the girl. "She is nice to Mina." She couldn't help but smile at that, but she felt sad. "And she's been nice to me."

"Do you think I should go out with her?" Tzuyu asked in her normal voice but her face seemed a little preoccupied, almost as if Chaeyoung had the final say in all that. 

"If you want to."

"But what do you think?" Tzuyu pressured. 

"Uh, yeah," Chaeyoung felt the intense gaze of Tzuyu making her a bit self-conscious, "why not? Go for it." At that Tzuyu nodded and looked away. 

"Right," she said. "Thanks." Tzuyu stood up and went to get the ramen in one of their drawers, they had everything they needed to prepare simple foods in their room, Chaeyoung thought that was cool. A bit later Dahyun got through the door. 

"Hey," she greeted Tzuyu and then went to smash Chaeyoung on the bed. "You," she said pushing her. "To what do we owe the pleasure of your presence this stormy afternoon?"

"Is the rain stronger?" Chaeyoung ignored the other part. 

"Yeah, later it will be worse." Dahyun got off of Chaeyoung and went to help Tzuyu. "Hope you brought an umbrella." 

"Right," Chaeyoung remembered she had not explained anything to them. "About that, do you think I could stay the night?"

"Why?" Dahyun handed her a bowl of instant noodles while sitting next to her with her own and Tzuyu sat in the other bed with her food too. "Did Mina finally kick you out?" Dahyun joked but Tzuyu did not find it funny. 

"Don't be mean," she scolded Dahyun. "She's not fine." 

"Thank you, Tzuyu." Chaeyoung turned to Dahyun with a frown. "She did not kick me out." 

"Then what happened?" Tzuyu was concerned. Chaeyoung was not sure how to answer and she was afraid they'd react as Nayeon does. 

"Well, it's complicated," Chaeyoung tried. "I don't understand exactly what happened either."

"That does not make sense."

"I know." 

"Okay try," Tzuyu encouraged her. Chaeyoung felt it was safe to tell them how she was feeling, she needed to trust them. 

"It's just that we argued..." she began. "And I might have said a few things I did not mean."

"What did you argue about?" Dahyun asked with some noodles in . "Tzuyu and I argue all the time, but she never sleeps somewhere else. Unfortunately." Tzuyu rolled her eyes but nodded to Chaeyoung.

"That's the thing," Chaeyoung felt so embarrassed, "I have no idea how it got to that."

"Okay just tell us the whole story so we can help you, please," Dahyun pressured. "Stop with the it's complicated."

And so Chaeyoung told them all about how Mina had woken her up, their nice walk, lunch, the being left alone with her friends thing, and the argument they had recently. 

"But she told you to go." Dahyun was as confused as Chaeyoung. 

"So she is not only homophobic but also an ..." Tzuyu asserted in a quiet voice. 

"She is neither of those, Tzuyu." Chaeyoung felt she needed to defend Mina. 

"Oh, but she sure looks like it," Dahyun agreed. Chaeyoung felt like she was only making it worse for Mina's image but she had only said the truth. 

"It makes no sense," Tzuyu was annoyed with the whole thing. "Is she jealous or something?"

'Jealous?' "Of what?" Chaeyoung could not see it. 

"Well, she said she wanted to spend time with you, and then she got mad because her friends appeared, it makes no sense that she told you to go with them, but to me, it sounds like jealousy," Tzuyu concluded. "She just has a weird way of showing it." And then she added, "Well, she is really weird." 

"Why would she be jealous?" Chaeyoung was not understanding Tzuyu's point of view. 

"Only she can tell you that," Dahyun gave her opinion too. "But I don't like how she thinks she can do anything she wants, Chaeyoungie. She thinks you're her pet." 

"It's not like that." Chaeyoung now felt nervous, she had not told her friends how funny Mina made her feel, even though they might have figured that out, it was still something she had not fully acknowledged, not out loud. 

"Everything you say about her sounds like it," Tzuyu continued. "Do you really not see it?"

"She's complicated." Chaeyoung had no idea how to justify Mina's behavior, or why she wanted to.

"Stop with that, that's not an excuse," Dahyun complained. "Enough, I'm calling Nayeon." 

"No!" Chaeyoung panicked. "Don't, please, she will only make fun of me."

"Maybe you deserve it," Dahyun answered back but Tzuyu helped again. 

"Dahyun, stop that, don't be so hard on her."

"Why are you being so nice today?" 

"I'm not." 

"Guys, don't argue." Chaeyoung did not feel like being in another silly fight. "Can I stay here or not?" 

"You know what," Dahyun turned to look at her. "You can't." 

"What? Why?"

"Because it's stupid, you still have to face her someday, might as well be now, and if you feel so sorry about what you said just explain that." 

Dahyun did have a point, but Chaeyoung was too scared to go back, she did not know how Mina would react. "I can't do that, what if she does not want to accept my apologies, or what if she is still mad." 

"Why do you care so much?" Tzuyu spat. Chaeyoung felt nervous again. 

"Well, I..." Chaeyoung felt both girls staring attentively at her. "I care for her." 

"Do you like her?" Tzuyu continued. 'why would she ask me that' Chaeyoung felt nauseous. 

"I can't like her." 

"That's not an answer." Tzuyu was determined to get one. Chaeyoung felt like running away. 

"Chaeyoungie," Dahyun put her hand on Chaeyoung's shoulder. "It's okay if you do." Tzuyu looked down when Dahyun said that but then got close to Chaeyoung, sitting on her other side. 

"It's not a bad thing," Tzuyu reassured her too. But somehow Chaeyoung did not feel like saying it, it was getting too real, she liked it in her head. If she says it out loud, it will be too real, she couldn't deal with reality. Not about that.

"I just care for her," Chaeyoung finally answered. "She cares for me too, I can see it." 

Tzuyu and Dahyun seemed skeptical but they accepted Chaeyoung's words. 

"Chaeyoungie," Dahyun started once again in that reassuring tone. "If you know she does and you do too, then go and talk to her, you should not be hiding here." Chaeyoung thought about it for a moment, Dahyun was right, she should not be hiding it was better to talk about it now. Mina was not going to ignore her, right? She did believe that Mina cared for her. 

"Well, Dahyun has a point but Chaeyoung, I don't think you should leave now." Tzuyu was looking through the window, the rain now was heavier. 

"Told you, stormy afternoon," Dahyun remembered. Chaeyoung felt she needed to leave now, she had not wanted to face Mina, but it made no sense either, just like Mina's actions, she couldn't ask for the girl to made sense if she herself was not going to. She should not have left like that in the first place. So yeah, she was not going to stay, she needed to get to Mina. 

***

'She is not that stupid to be wandering outside, right?' 

'She better gets here soon'

'C'mon it's really dark now'

Mina was worried, she had passed through many emotions after their argument. At first, she had not known how to react, it was all too fast and she had never seen Chaeyoung like that. Then she felt lonely, she wanted her to come back. But she believed that she had to be mad, so she got angry at the girl, and then she got angry at herself, then the rain had started to fall down hard, making her worry, she had no idea if Chaeyoung was outside alone or if she had gone somewhere, many times she felt tempted to call her, but she resisted, it would be too awkward. 

What could she say? She had made a mistake, she got that now but her pride was stronger. Mina felt torn, she wanted Chaeyoung here, but she did not want to accept her mistake. She had got a call from Momo, for a moment she had not wanted to take it but then she felt too curious about how things had gone with Chaeyoung so she did. Momo had complained about how apparently Chaeyoung was not the brightest, Mina smiled at that, and it was even funnier coming from Momo, she was not the brightest either. But well, it was true her roommate could be a bit slow. Then it got complicated because Momo had asked how Chaeyoung was doing, and Mina was not sure how she was supposed to answer, so she just said she was fine. Sana interrupted the call saying that Chaeyoung had been really weird and that she hoped she was feeling better now. Mina had no idea what Chaeyoung had said so she just agreed. At the end of the call she realized how awkward it must have been for her, that's when she started to feel guilty.

It's been hours now, it was dark and the rain was out of control, Mina was about to give up on waiting for Chaeyoung, she had to sleep that would make everything better but she got a text. 

From Chaeyoung :) 9:45pm 
Im outside 
would you open

'The she means with that, it's her room too' 

To Chaeyoung :) 9:46pm
W hy cant u get in yourself

From Chaeyoung :) 9:46pm
pls

'God, Chaeyoung you're so weird sometimes' Mina was annoyed but deep down she was happy Chaeyoung had returned. So she went to open the door for her. 'I swear if she's soaking wet I'll kill her'. Chaeyoung was indeed right outside the door. 

"Why didn't you get in on your own?" Mina started. "And you are soaking wet, god, Chaeyoung, you're gonna be sick." Chaeyoung had not said a thing, she was looking down still outside the room. "You could have knocked too." 

"I was not sure you wanted me here, I needed to ask if-" But then Chaeyoung let out a gasp and grabbed Mina's arm strongly pushing her inside. The power had gone out, it was all completely dark. 

"What's with you?" Mina tried to leave Chaeyoung's hold but the girl was too attached to her. Then she remembered Chaeyoung's night lamp. "Oh, you can't be serious," Mina laughed closing the door and guiding Chaeyoung inside who had the flashlight of her phone, well she did not need to guide her, the girl was following her every step. 

"Don't laugh," Chaeyoung simply said. Everything was completely dark, apparently, the storm had messed with the electricity of the campus. Inside Mina got rid of Chaeyoung's strong hand on her arm by grabbing her hand and turning her own flashlight on. 

"Are you really scared?" 

"Yes." 

"It's all the same." 

"It's not." 

"Okay then, let's go to sleep, if you close your eyes then it's dark too," Mina thought that solution was brilliant, so she was about to leave Chaeyoung's hand when strong white light illuminated the whole room for a second making Chaeyoung hold on tighter. 'wow, she's a kid'  "You can't be serious," Mina said and right after the sound of the thunder was heard, as expected, but Chaeyoung got scared either way. 

"I can't sleep like that," Chaeyoung said softly. 'perfect'

"Okay, but what can I do about that?" Mina felt the girl was exaggerating. "You can't be that scared, come on, if you close your eyes it's the same and the storm, well, you can put on headphones." 'there, easy' But suddenly Chaeyoung's flashlight turned off making the girl get closer to Mina once again. 'What a Clown'  

"I'm sorry," Chaeyoung said. Mina used her phone flashlight to illuminate Chaeyoung's face and now she could see clearly the girl was not making this up, she looked terrified.

"You're not joking," Mina acknowledged. 

"Sorry," Chaeyoung said once again and this time Mina understood. Somehow they had forgotten all about their previous argument. Mina felt she needed to help her but how? Then she remembered Chaeyoung had been out in the rain. 

"You need to change clothes or you'll get sick." Mina now spoke with a soft voice, she felt bad for laughing at her. 

"I can't." Chaeyoung had been only saying simple sentences, she sounded ashamed. 

"Why?" 

"I don't-" she hesitated. "I don't want to let go." 

"Oh." Mina had no idea how to make her feel better, then another bolt of lightning illuminated the room, and then the thunder. Chaeyoung gave a squeeze to Mina's hand with every new event. Mina sighed. She offered her phone to Chaeyoung who accepted quickly. "Change clothes okay, use the light, I'll be right here," Mina tried. "You can't sleep like that." 

"I don't want to go to the bathroom alone," Chaeyoung explained. Mina was now finding the girl oddly cute.  

"Just change here, I can't even see." Mina had no idea how hard that task could be for her roommate but she could see how Chaeyoung just nodded and started moving, leaving Mina's hand. Mina just stood there, looking through the window waiting for Chaeyoung to be ready, then she felt Chaeyoung's hand again on hers. It felt weird, she found it heart-warming how the girl needed her for comfort. 

"Sorry." 

"Don't be sorry." Mina didn't want Chaeyoung to feel like a burden. "I'm sorry for laughing at you, I didn't know you were for real." Mina's phone flashlight being the only thing illuminating the room was not helpful at all, it was still pretty dark and the rain could be heard more.

"No, I'm sorry for before," Chaeyoung clarified. "I brought cake." 

'of course she did'  Mina did not feel like talking about that other thing now. "Where did you leave it?"

"I'm not sure, I let go of it." Chaeyoung sounded sad. "Maybe it is in the hallway." Mina tried to go look for it but Chaeyoung did not let go. 'right' 

"Don't you want to go to bed now?" Mina asked.

"I don't want to be alone."

"You won't be alone, I'll be on the other side." 

"That's too far away."

"How do I know you are not just being clingy now?"

"You're the clingy one."

"What makes you say that?" Mina was surprised. 

"You wouldn't let go of my hand today, walking."

"Oh." That was all Mina could say, she had not thought about that, maybe Chaeyoung had been uncomfortable. "Sorry." 

"No, it's okay," Chaeyoung explained "I was just saying." 

There was something in Chaeyoung's voice that sounded different, Mina could not understand what it was, maybe the girl just felt ashamed so Mina wanted to help. "Come." Mina let go of Chaeyoung's hand. "If you don't want to let go, grab my pajama shirt okay? but I need my hands," she explained quietly. She started by moving carefully both nightstands to the other side of the room one by one and then she went near her bed and use all her strength to pull from it, to move it just a bit so it would leave the wall, then she went to that side and pushed until it reached Chaeyoung's bed. "There," she sounded happy with the results. "Now I won't be too far away, just enough." Chaeyoung illuminated the beds with the light. 

"That's smart," she said.

"Because I am," Mina smiled proudly. "Okay now get in." Chaeyoung obeyed letting go of Mina's shirt until she got to her bed, then Mina got in her own bed too. She had to admit it was all a little bit weird, but if it made Chaeyoung feel better then it was fine. 

"Thank you." Chaeyoung was illuminating the ceiling, while looking up, she was laying on her back. Mina was on her side looking at her. 

"It's fine" She whispered. Mina did not know what else to say, she felt she needed to apologize for her actions today, but the words just wouldn't leave . They were in silence for a while until lighting struck again. 

"Could I hold your hand again?" Chaeyoung asked with such a slow voice full of doubt that Mina felt for the girl, it was almost as if she was scared of how Mina would react to the question. She did not like that Chaeyoung was doubting simple actions like that, but it was sweet in a way that she had asked first, so she didn't answer and before the thunder could be heard, she got closer to the girl grabbing her hand. Chaeyoung turned to look at her for a second and then kept looking a the ceiling. Mina kept quiet, she was staring at Chaeyoung's face, she always got lost staring at her face, but never this much. Maybe she had to look better because of the lack of light. She was not sure what it was but she couldn't stop staring. 

"Do I have something on the face?" Mina felt nervous, she had not realized Chaeyoung could see her staring. 

"I'm sorry for what I did today" 'there, I said it, it was not that hard, well done, Mina'

"What did you do today?" 'God, Chaeyoung, why can't you just accept the apology'

"I left you," Mina tried to explain without losing her mind from embarrassment. "I was stupid, I don't know why." 

"You never know why." Chaeyoung sounded really hurt now, Mina got confused. She was about to ask when Chaeyoung turned to face her too. The flashlight was still pointing to the ceiling, Chaeyoung's face was barely visible but she could see how sad her eyes were. Mina got a bit anxious, she did not like the way Chaeyoung's gaze made her feel, they created that feeling of wanting to hide. So Mina looked down, but Chaeyoung lifted her head leaving the hold of her hand. Mina's heart started to go faster now, she was sure her face was red too but she couldn't move nor speak, she needed to hide again. 'What are you doing now, Chaeyoung'  Mina needed her to stop, but what? She was just holding her chin and looking at her eyes but it made Mina miss Chaeyoung's warmth. "What are you thinking?" Chaeyoung broke Mina's confusing thoughts. 

"I..." But she did not know what to answer, she couldn't say she was thinking of throwing herself in her arms once again, or how nervous she felt, or how fast her heart was going, she just couldn't say that. "I was just..." But then Chaeyoung let go of her chin and went quickly under the sheets. Lighting and then thunder. Mina got out of her trance. "You're a kid," she smiled. 

"Don't laugh," Chaeyoung exclaimed from under. 

"I'm not, just get out." 

"Why? You couldn't even speak." 

Mina felt exposed. 'I hate you'  "You were being weird" Mina tried to blame Chaeyoung.

"How so?" 

"You were looking at me."

"You were looking at me first." 'Good point'

"Okay, good night, I'm turning the flashlight of.f" Mina had no other excuse so she took other measures, reaching for her phone she turned the thing off and turned to the other side. She felt Chaeyoung getting out of under the sheets but she had not expected the girl to get closer to her. 'Right, she's a scared cub' She felt her head on her back and her hands grabbing her pajama shirt. 

"You're mean..."  Mina felt Chaeyoung scared again, she was not making this up, it was adorable in a way. Mina wanted to turn around again, she wanted to see how Chaeyoung's face looked like, but something in her was screaming that it was not a good idea to go back to that position. But then again, without the light, she was not going to see much, what's the worst that could happen. So she turned slowly, she was right, now it was even harder to form the girl in the dark, she could barely see that Chaeyoung had her hands in fists and her eyes were shut tightly. 

"Cry baby," Mina whispered. Chaeyoung did not move, so Mina kept staring once again. Now that there weren't eyes looking back at her, she felt it was secure to get lost. There is no point denying that she loves to look at Chaeyoung, so she kept doing it. She could barely see her factions, and as if the universe was helping her, lighting struck again illuminating Chaeyoung's features, she felt her heart racing again but she liked it, and before the girl could get scared again because of the thunder, she got even closer and grabbed her head softly almost caressing her cheek. "It's okay." Chaeyoung's eyes were still shut tightly, but Mina started rubbing her face with her thumb, making the girl open her eyes, but she did not look at Mina, and then she closed them again, but softly. "Is it better now?" Mina asked softly. Chaeyoung nodded which made Mina smile, remembering the last time they had communicated like that.

After a while Chaeyoung reached for Mina's hand on her face with her own, Mina felt Chaeyoung's warmth immediately with the contact, it was embarrassing how much she liked it, she wanted to cry but she resisted, that had already happened, this time she would have to give an explanation. So she tried to remove her hand, but Chaeyoung did not let her. 

"Don't," Chaeyoung whispered. "I love fantasies."

Mina didn't quite understand that and she was too afraid to ask so she just left her hand there, until Chaeyoung fell asleep. Mina's feeling of crying did not go away and her heart felt heavy, but she fell asleep either way thinking that, maybe, tomorrow everything would be gone.