"I'm sorry,"

 His voice was unusually soft when he spoke the first words, his eyes were gazing into yours, but they were void of any emotion. These words could never mean anything well, and although your hand was still in his, you were fearing; suddenly paranoid. The way he was holding it was different, lighter, just as if he was going to let go and before you could help it, you were already tightening your fingers around his.

"What- Jongdae, what do you mean?" The words felt like thick syrup in your throat and they caused you, even more, fear, in your chest was your heart hammering against your ribs, teeth digging into your cheek as you searched for something in his eyes, anything, that could promise you the opposite of what you were expecting. But you were only to be disappointed when he didn't waver, at this point, you were sure that your heart was starting to crack, waiting for the final blow.

"We should break up." Even though you had expected exactly this to happen, the words still crashed on you like a wave, it felt as if ice had been dumped at you because the moment the words left his lips, you felt your heart stop. Something warm burned behind your eyes and you were blinking furiously before it could cloud your view. 

Unfair. It was unfair, he was unfair. It was so unfair that he had to look so unavoidably beautiful in a moment like this when his fingers were loosening from yours, when he was letting you go.

An angel, he was an actual angel.

His brown hair was impeccable, parted in the middle, leaving a clear spot of his forehead. His skin pale and silky smooth, his lips, oh, his lips were the most beautiful thing you acknowledged on this earth, colored in a faint pink and incredibly smooth, and warm.

The question why tumbled over your lips, voice shaking so much that it had been practically impossible to help it, at that Jongdae sent you an apologizing stare, guilty but also pitiful. As if he knew too well that his next words were going to stab you very deeply and he was feeling bad for you. And to be frank, you hated it.

"I'm just not, in love with you anymore. And I'm really so sorry to say this now, in this stage of our relationship, but I hope you understand that I-" Jongdae halted for a moment to sigh frustratedly, it made you more anxious that he wasn't saying it all at once because it was just extending the blinding pain of your clenching heart.

"I hope you understand that I can't go on like this. Y/n, I love you, just not that way." But I do, the words lingered on your tongue. His hand was not holding yours anymore, and you already missed the warmth of his body. It was cold. And while you eyed him with wide glazed eyes, his other hand proceeded to slide off the engagement ring from his ring finger, took your hand and pushed the small diamond into your palm. You couldn't help the tear that fell flatly on your cheek. 

He had just returned your heart, in the worst shape you could ever get it back. Broken was an understatement. The pain was so strong that you felt it spread through your whole body. Feet glued into the ground, legs weak and trembling when all you wanted to do was to run away from him. 

You didn't know how you managed the smile on your lips as you nodded understandingly. 

"Of course, I understand. I hope life will go well for you." You were asking yourself why you still were keeping back the tears instead of screaming at him and hitting his chest as any other person would have done. He was your husband to be after all. Was.

Jongdae bit his lips, nodding uncertainly, looking uneasy. He probably didn't know what to say now that you had answered him, and you understood it. 

And then he did the last thing you expected him to do. His warm hands were suddenly back on your face, and foolishly for a moment, you thought that perhaps the past minutes had indeed been just a very bad nightmare. Jongdae's warm and damp lips pressed against your forehead. His lips lingered for a while, though you were so shocked that you hadn't even gotten the time to relax against him that he had already stepped away.

A soft "Goodbye," lingered in the thick air of his apart