2.   LIFE IS FUNNY

We had breakfast in bed, feeling too lazy to leave the room. We toasted each other once again with our juice glasses.

“I love you forever, Kim Jinki.”

“Beyond the end of time, Lee Jonghyun.”

And then laughed at how it sounded. Breakfast was left half eaten as we pounced on each other to satisfy another hunger. No family to worry about, we moaned as loudly as we wanted. We stopped only to have lunch. Actually, we didn’t stop even then. We kept kissing as we fed each other.

Sun was setting when we finally decided to stop. “I think Uncle is right. I am definitely an old man and feeling totally zapped.” I said thoughtfully.

“If only Uncle could see the way you loved me through the night like a 20 year old.” Puppy pulled me for a shower. While we showered, he showed me once again how much he loved my old body. And then we had to shower once again. It was night by the time we left the shower and dressed in our wedding hanboks for lack of any other clothes.

We called Siwon and Heechul to let them know we were leaving. There was a lot of giggling audible in the background as Siwon answered, “Wait for 10 minutes and we’ll meet you in the lobby.”

Puppy looked at me and winked. We laughed and went to pay our bills. Of course we left a big tip in the room for the housekeeping. We settled the bill for Siwon and Heechul also while waiting for them. We needed to reach home and change for the dinner hosted by Heechul’s father.

When the couple finally appeared, we were shocked to see Heechul’s neck covered with hickeys of all sizes. In the ten years we’d known them, this was the first time we saw such a sight. Where the wedding ceremony made no difference to us, we could see the change in them. We refrained from teasing them as they were already beet red noticing our careful observation of Heechul’s neck.

When we reached home, Byong jumped and held on to both our necks. This was the first time we spent a night away from home. He began chattering non-stop about his day’s activities. We got to know how he pulled Duckie’s doll’s hair and got kicked by her. Minx and Duckie hid his favorite toy gun. And he hid their favorite dolls in retaliation, returning them only when Sehun promised him the largest ice cream sundae. He whined that the girls still had his toy gun which he was missing very much.

While he was still chattering, Duckie and Minx barreled into us and Duckie climbed into my arms. Minx hung from Puppy’s neck while Byong wouldn’t get down from his arms. All of us crashed into the couch in the living room. We could hear imo calling from her room to the girls to finish their hair dressing.

Byong kept up his litany, Minx and Duckie added details to it by letting us know how mischievous Byong was and they wouldn’t return the gun till he apologized for troubling them. We looked at Byong who mutinously shook his head refusing to apologize.

“Why should I when they hid my gun first.” Byong clarified.

“You pulled my doll’s hair.” Duckie wagged a finger at him.

“You kicked me.” He defended himself.

After hearing both sides out, Puppy raised his hand to silence them, “I think everyone is equal offender and defender. If Byong troubled you, you have taken your revenge as well girls. It’s only fair that you return his gun. And Byong you must learn that there is no harm in apologizing. After all you did set things in motion by pulling doll’s hair first.”

Three of them hung their heads on hearing Puppy’s words. Byong apologized to both girls and kissed Duckie on her cheeks for making her cry. She skipped off to get his gun. Door bell rang again and Minx opened it for an excited Sehun dressed for the party in a suit.

“Ummappa, appa you are back. Come on we’re waiting to open the hahm.”

“Thank you Sunshine for making Byong give back the dolls. Give us two minutes to change.” I kissed his forehead and he smiled extra bright for me.   

Minx looked at her watch and said, “Your time starts now.”

We rushed into our bed room and changed into our suits at superfast speed. Once we had the pants and shirts on, we called the kids into the room. They could open the box for us while we completed our dressing.

Ji followed the kids as Sehun carried the box. Imo came with a brush to do up the girls’ hair. Uncle stood near the door of our overflowing room and grinned. Puppy took out three sets of bow ties and gave one to Uncle to put on Sehun. He made the others wait till it was tied on.

As we slowly tied ours, the kids went to work on the gift box. Ji opened the silk cloth around it and we exclaimed over the intricate carving of the box. It was from Sehun’s parents. Imo decided to display it in the living room besides the pair of wooden geese already on display, one from Soo’s wedding and one from Siwon’s the day before.

On opening it, Byong reached in and picked up a small velvet box that was placed on top of everything. Ji opened it for him. Puppy and I looked in shock at the pair of diamond encrusted platinum rings. There was a beautiful note from Soo and Leeteuk whyich Ji read it aloud as the box was handed to everyone before reaching us.

“Congratulations to the two Best Men we know. These rings are one of a kind, like you. Wear them in love and happiness. Soo and Doc.”

We shifted our destiny rings to the right hand as there were expectations to put on the gift immediately. We grinned as I put the new ring on the ring finger of Puppy’s left hand and he on mine. We raised our hands for everyone to admire. We weren’t surprised at the perfect fit as Soo had measured our fingers for size with an inane excuse. However, we had not expected such an expensive gift.

Sehun picked up a silver photo frame from the box and read the accompanying congratulatory note from DongHae and Hyukkie. It contained a photograph of ours from the wedding photo shoot a few days ago which showed us with the string of destiny tying our hands and bodies together. Imo put it on our bedside table.

Next was a large package from Siwon and Heechul. Minx excitedly opened it to reveal five matching silk and velvet pajama sets with our initials JJ beautifully monogrammed on each. No wonder the package was so large. After everyone had appreciated them, I placed them in our dresser.

Last package that the kids picked up was tightly sealed and small in size. The note was read aloud, “Open it in private. TaeKey.” Puppy immediately took it from Minx who was about to tear into it.

“No, no baby girl you are not getting your hands on this one. Key umma will be very upset if he comes to know you opened it.” He admonished while putting it at the back of the dresser drawer.

The kids pouted but Ji diverted them by asking what we had gifted Heechul and Siwon. She looked at her bare fingers when we informed it was a pair of platinum destiny rings. Minx and Sehun hugged her from both sides teasing her, “Don’t worry you will also get married soon.”

“Oh no, I don’t want to marry any time soon and have brats like you both. I value my freedom too much. And I am not vacating my room for Sehun to move into.” Ji pulled Sehun’s cheeks as she back.

“Meanie noona.” Sehun poked his tongue at her. With a quick move Ji pinched his tongue in her finger tips. We laughed as he struggled to get loose. She let go only when Minx began tickling her.

Uncle reminded us to leave or we’d be late for the dinner. Imo quickly put a few coins in the empty hahm box and arranged it in the living room. We wore our footwear and moved out to pile into our family car. Sehun’s mother was locking up their house as he waved her a bye.

At the venue we were met by anxiously waiting Heechul who whisked away Duckie to change her clothes. Soo and Doc spotted us and I took the baby from Doc to coo over him. At the age of six months, little Park Junsu recognized us very well. He gurgled as Puppy and I cooed at him. Holding him in my right arm, I extended my left hand to his parents as we thanked them for their wonderful gift. Puppy also scolded Soo for spending so much money on the rings.

Doc intervened, “Stop scolding Soo. The gift is from part of my Prize award money. It’s a small token of thanks for what you have given me in my life.”

We hugged them. Suddenly I felt a pat on my bum followed by a disappointed hiss.

Hyukkie moved his hand from my to punch Puppy in the shoulder, “What hyung, you are totally useless. Jinki hyung did not even flinch when I patted his . You are turning as old as he is.”

“What do you mean?” Puppy asked in surprise.

“After our wedding night, I couldn’t sit for two days without feeling the effects.” Hyukkie winked at Puppy.

I whacked Hyukkie on his head, “Have some shame, there are ladies present.” I pointed at Soo standing beside me.

She laughed, “Don’t worry about me. A lifetime with TaeKey oppa has long cured me of any feelings of embarrassment.”

“Who called our names?” Tae enquired joining us. He looked me over carefully then wagged a finger at Puppy. “What Jjong? There is not a single hickey on hyung’s neck. What did you two do last night? Sleep? Well hyung is old now. But you at least should have had some energy.”

“Ah Tae hyung, I think you want to get kicked out of bed once more. Was once not enough two years ago?” Puppy innocently asked him.

Tae immediately looked in horror at Puppy and then at Kibum who began looking speculatively at him. His hands automatically went to cover his behind as he remembered the after effects of our US holiday. He quickly left us muttering, “I have an evil pair of relatives.” Kibum followed him with an evil twinkle in his eyes.

Puppy and I laughed as the others wondered what just happened. Hyukkie looked at the retreating backs of TaeKey, with Tae walking with his hands covering his . He looked at us laughing our heads off and then looked at DongHae. I stopped laughing as his eyes began gleaming speculatively. I nudged Puppy. We watched as Hyukkie pinched DongHae’s and he flinched.

“Hyung tonight is your turn.” Hyukkie sort of whispered in excitement.

“What is my turn? I didn’t know we were playing any game.” DongHae asked him in confusion.

“It’s your turn to not sit properly for two days.” Hyukkie waggled his brows suggestively.

We saw DongHae’s brain work and reach the right conclusion. “Oh no, no. You keep your evil hands off me.”

Hyukkie shrugged nonchalantly, “Fine then from today on you sleep with Amber.”

DongHae looked at him in shock to which he responded with an innocent smile and walked away. DongHae looked at us hoping our faces will have an answer to his dilemma. Siwon and Heechul joined us at that precise moment. We grinned at all of them.

Siwon thumped DongHae in the back, “Close your mouth Hae. Stop looking like a fish. That’s Hyukkie’s specialty.”

“Hyukkie. He. These two. He. Me.” DongHae sputtered trying to make sense of his thoughts.

“Stop spouting nonsense he me he. There isn’t anything wrong or these two wouldn’t be grinning like a pair of idiots.” Siwon thumped harder on DongHae’s back.

Soo and Doc looked at us curiously, waiting for the next bit of info to make sense of what was happening. Heechul looked around and then at us. “Why is Tae walking with his hands covering his ? And why is he running away from Key?”

Puppy and I began laughing again. DongHae wagged his finger at us and tried to say something but words failed him again. His mouth just opened and closed. Heechul looked at us, then at DongHae, then at TaeKey and then at DongHae again. He looked around till he found Hyukkie standing with the kids, a big smirk on his face.

“Jinx is it what I think it is about?” Heechul asked me.

I nodded, trying to control my laughter. Heechul wrapped his arm around my waist and began laughing with us. Soo and Doc looked even more puzzled. Siwon pulled DongHae away from us to grill him in private. Imo came over to take baby Junsu from us. We immediately sobered up not wanting to explain to imo. Thankfully Heechul was wearing a high neck to cover his hickey littered skin. Soo walked away with imo and the baby, nudging Doc in the process.

I stopped him before he could say a word. “Doc don’t ask and we won’t lie. It is not for Soo to know.”

“I don’t want to be kicked out of our bed. Have mercy on me and tell me what this whole drama is all about.” Doc pleaded with us.

Heechul blushed and moved away leaving Puppy and me to handle Doc and explanations alone. I called out after him, “Fair weather friend.” He turned and smiled making his way to his father.

“Umm hyung, it’s better if you don’t know. That way you can honestly tell Soo we refused giving you any info.” Puppy suggested helpfully.

“She is your sister. You know her better than that. If you don’t want to tell me, fine. I will go tell her that. Get ready to be grilled by her then.” Doc turned to go.

“Wait, wait. Stop right there you blackmailer. It’s up to you how you deal with Soo.” I held his arm to stop him.

He grinned at us.

“Oh god Tokki, I think we have corrupted our Doc hyung. He was so innocent two years ago.” Puppy moaned.

“He is a doctor. There is no way to corrupt him. Studying medicine is corruption enough. You have no idea about the lewd jokes and mnemonics that sail through the dorm corridors.” I consoled Puppy.

“You cannot divert my attention this way. Now out with it. What has Taemin running away like a scared rabbit and Hyukkie kicking Hae out of their bed?” Doc got straight to the point.

“Sunwoo hyung is calling me. Tokki you explain. You started it after all.” Puppy wriggled away from the explanation with a reddening face.

“Jjong leaving you alone to explain? Now I am dying of curiosity. Hurry up Jinki.” Doc resembled Byong as he began bouncing on his toes.

“It’s about the roles in bed. We gays also have sort of male-female roles.” I began. Doc nodded. “Tae, Siwon and Hae are the males in their beds. Hyukkie and Kibum are demanding role reversal.”

“Interesting. I always wondered about how such strong personalities like theirs could be happy being at the receiving end in bed. Maybe I should do a study on it. Do you think it could be driven by the hormones Jinki?” Doc his chin as his brain began working scientifically. He looked at Kibum, Heechul and Hyukkie who were now talking to each other.

“It cannot be just the hormones. It is also the mind set and attitude with which they enter the relationship and then get stuck in their roles.” I had my own theories. After all Puppy had higher levels of testosterone than me but was very happy in our equal status relationship.

We began discussing the science behind ual dominance till we were interrupted by Sehun’s parents. I thanked them for the beautiful wedding gift. We talked general stuff before moving around to mingle with everyone else.

Heechul’s father had booked the banquet hall in the city’s best hotel and there was heavy security at the doors to prevent any media from entering. There were three long tables beautifully set for our dinner. A bar was set up on one side of the room. Kids were on the dance floor grooving to the music played by the dj, on the other side of the room.

Appa had invited Kibum’s family also and was introducing them to Heechul’s father. Minseok and his wife had a 5-year-old girl and a 3-year-old boy. Joon-myun had a girl aged 4 years. True to his word, he had married a tall girl and both were managing their own export-import business.

I got Puppy and made our way to them. We bowed and accepted their congratulations. Kibum’s parents handed us an envelope. We called over the kids from the dance floor to pay their respects to the Kim family. Kids bowed to all and Minx took the children with them to the dance floor.

Taemin called over a server to get mocktails for everyone except Joon-myun whom he dragged off to the bar. I saw Tae handing a cocktail glass to him.

Heechul’s father had gone all out to celebrate his only son’s wedding. A few local political bigwigs and businessmen were also invited. All were given a time half an hour later than the family. Heechul and Siwon stood at the banquet entrance with Heechul’s father to greet in the guests. Later our entire group was also introduced to the guests and their families. They were aware of most of us by name and newspaper articles any way.

We had already met most of them in the course of our hagwon business. The new Mayor was there with his wife. Daegu’s members of National Assembly were present with their families. Daegu Police Agency’s Chief Superintendent General came with his wife.

Later I whispered to Puppy, “Look at your mother. has not closed in the past half hour since abeoji’s work colleagues began arriving.”

Puppy whispered back, “Could you have imagined this ten years ago? You were scared of the impact our relationship would have on my career. Today our wedding is the toast of the town and we are congratulated by all the local biggies. Best are your father and Tae hyung. I just cannot get enough of watching them preen at your success.”

“Our success.”

“I love you yeobo.”

“I love you too jagi.”

Champagne was flowing freely and I took a glass from the passing server and shared it with Puppy. Minx and Sehun came over wanting to share as well. I gave them one sip each, warning them to keep silent about it. They grinned and went back to their dancing.

It didn’t take long for all the women to gather together and talk. Sehun dragged us to dance with them. We got the younger members of our special guest group to join as well. Kai got Joon-myun, Minseok and their wives as well. Minseok’s wife had taught him rudimentary dance steps and they were enjoying dancing at the fringes of the group while Joon-myun grooved in the middle with his wife.

After half hour of dancing, we broke up to have dinner which was a lavish feast. With their stomachs full, children wanted to dance more. DJ put on fast tracks. Tables were quickly moved to the corners for the elders to sit and converse. The rest of us congregated in the center to dance. Tae and Heechul kept taking the dancing guests for drinks in between songs. We just hoped some of our important parents wouldn’t get upset to find their children half drunk.

It was late in the night by the time banquet hall emptied out. We had made many new friends that night as had the children.

On the way to our cars, a half-drunk Tae thumped Siwon’s back, “You are very brave hyung. Very brave.” He then turned to Puppy and me. “Puppy I am going to hang you by your tail one day. You better watch out. You and Jinki hyung are two evil men.” He then muttered to himself. “My is going to be on fire soon. Evil men. Turning my Kitty into a devil. Oh my poor .”

We laughed as he was dragged away by a glaring Kibum. When we were alone in our bedroom, Puppy wondered what they were doing and we doubled up in laughter once again.

Oh yes our life was good. It was very good.

And funny.