“I want to properly introduce you to our little family. Guys this is Jackson and this little girl is Layla.” Yixing spoke to EXO-M. I was in the kitchen popping some popcorn. The aroma filled my dorm and it made every little thing better. In this moment, nothing was able to bring me down from my little high. Everything was perfect.

Yixing was staying here with me while the rest of EXO was going to LA to record for their repackage album. Two weeks with him helping me and us being a family.

I walked back into the living room with three bags of popped popcorn and as soon as I reached the couch, they disappeared to the boy’s arms where they were gobbling it up in seconds.

“Wow, thanks guys. It’s not like I wanted some.” I said sarcastically. Baekhyun gave one of the bags of popcorn back to me. “Here you go.”

I looked in the bag and there was literally ten pieces of popcorn. “Thanks…”

Out of nowhere Jackson started crying in Luhan’s arms. “I didn’t do anything.” He panicked.

I put the bag of popcorn down and walked over to him. “He’s probably just hungry. It’s not your fault.”

“Taylor, I can feed him.” Yixing spoke up.

“Honey, I think I’m more suited for that job since his food comes from me.” I laughed, making Yixing turn bright red. The entire room kind of calmed down from my comment. I don’t know why though.

Making my way over to Luhan, I took Jackson out of his arms and cradled my son in my arms. “I’m going to the bedroom. So none of you have to see.”

As I entered my bedroom, I sat down on the bed and lifted my shirt. Readjusting Jackson to be closer to me, he started to take my milk from me. I heard laughter from the other room. I missed whatever what was funny. As usual. Not like I would even get the joke, I was slow when it came to humor. Yes I was a sarcastic but I’m not a funny one.

I walked around my room as I fed Jackson. I’m getting really good at walking and feeding at the same time. Multi-tasking at its finest.

Out of the corner of my eye though I noticed something sticking out of the dresser. I guess I haven’t really been in my room since I left for the hospital. It was a piece of paper that was stuck to one of Yixing’s sweatshirts. One of his shirts that he leaves in his drawer for when he stays the night. I figured that I opened his drawer when I was pulling out one of his pairs of track pants to wear. His clothes fit me well during my pregnancy and they were comfier then girl clothes.

I really shouldn’t snoop around but it was my apartment. He left it here and I’m just trying to clean up.

With Jackson still in my arms, I grabbed the piece of paper that was sticking out. On the paper looked like Chinese writing. I couldn’t really read it but I could pick apart words I did understand.

It was mostly numbers which almost looked like dates. It stated their comeback date and almost every day after that something to go with it.

A schedule. It was his schedule.

Days and days of activities. It was up until September it looked like. Almost 4 months full of stuff. He was right. EXO is getting more and more popular by the minute.

I held back all the emotions going through me. I almost forgot that I was still holding my son. Quickly putting back the paper in his drawer, I closed it and waited for Jackson to finish.

I sat on my bed and just blanked out. I raised my expectations too much. I thought that since he was here for two weeks with him that he would be here always.

I was wrong. So wrong.

We are supposed to appear as this perfect little family but the truth is, we are slowly tearing apart. I love Yixing. I truly do but if he is going to be gone for a long time, I don’t think I could be here waiting like this.

What if I go back to Canada for a month or two? You know, see my parents and be able to raise my kids in an environment where they won’t be attacked if we step one foot outside.

I want my kids to be able to slide down a slide or be able to fully experience winter or even summer. Days where we can go out to the lake and enjoy a day of swimming. Build sandcastles and go on hikes.

How can I do that when every girl in Korea wants to hurt me? What does that tell me about one day going out on a walk with my kids? What will happen then?

Crying… crying… All I hea