Being a mother is a fulltime job and I have to give an award to families that have more than two children. But I guess nothing in life is simple or easy. We have to earn everything. I waited patiently for a two hour nap between the feedings as the babies slept. If I wasn't soothing them from crying then I was pumping. I was exhausted and it was only my first night.

Every two hours the feeding nurse told me. I had to feed them every two hours. It might have been easier if I had someone with me so that we could switch and take turns. But I guess nothing good in life comes for free.

Yixing never came back the next morning or the afternoon. It killed me knowing that he was leaving me behind to look after our children. I was struggling enough to produce milk and I didn't have the time to go out and get formula from the nearest grocery store. Even if I did leave the dorms, then I would have to have so many sercuity guards following me. I didn't want to bother Hana either, she shouldn't be the one picking up baby supplies. Yixing should be. Even though his debut is coming up and he is leaving for America in a day or so. I couldn't stay mad at him. It's his job, I just wished he took off a week or two to spend time with his family. Was I being too selfish? Quite possibly.

I figured out that playing Yixing's self composed songs helps the babies be lulled to sleep. Hearing both of them parents calmed down their crying. I orginally had a tracklist of songs of ballads that Yixing wrote to me so I decided to burn them onto a CD and play it in the babies room on a low volume.

I sat on the couch with a turkey sandwich in one hand and a glass of cold milk in the other. I tried to keep up with the nutrients I was supposed to be taking. And how can I refuse milk? It's so good.

The television was to a music channel just so I could keep up with everybodies songs these days. I watched Shinee's performance of 'Why So Serious' and I almost forget that they made a comeback. They were so good and I was so proud of Taemin belting it out. It felt weird seeing him debut earlier than I did but he did train longer than me.

I took a bite out of my sandwich and placed it down on the plate in front of me. In the corner of my eye, I saw the unfinished stroller. I really should get to it but I was too lazy and maybe Hana and I could put it together later when I would be forced to leave this dorm.

My phone vibrated as it sat next to the plate. I put down my milk and grabbed my phone, sliding my finger across the screen.

From Jongin:

Are you at the dorm? Some of us were thinking to come visit you before we head to practice...

From Taylor:

I am but I can't assure you that I look presentable. And I finally put the babies to bed after a sleepless night.

From Jongin:

If we wake up the babies then I will personally tend to their needs.

To Jongin:

Fine. Come over then. I'm just eating while watching some television.

I hated waiting but so as the time passed, I ate one half of my sandwich then got up to check on Layla and Jackson. I still had a little bit of a stomach, kind of making me look like I was still around 5 months pregnant. Soon I'm going to have to start back up at the gym and get this gut off of me so I get finally go dress shopping for my wedding.

Wedding... Oh yeah, I'm engaged. It feels too surreal. Almost like it was never there. I guess... I love Yixing but I am really ready to get married anytime soon?

As I entered the nursery, I peered over the cribs to see if one of the two were awake. I saw Layla staring up at me with her wide eyes, taking after me of course. But Jackson was still sleeping.