Sehun felt like someone threw a brick at his head.

“Idiot.”

Sehun’s eyes slowly fluttered open and he cringed when the too bright sunlight stung his eyes. His hand went to press against his forehead and shield his eyes from the sunlight and he opened them again. He could make out the fuzzy frame of someone sitting next to him, but he couldn’t tell who.

“Where am I?” he asked.

“My house.”

Sehun rubbed sleep out of his eyes and then squinted. “Luhan?”

“Who else,” Luhan replied, his tone bored. He pushed a glass of water closer to Sehun and then watched Sehun struggle to sit upright. “Drink it.”

Sehun picked the glass up. It felt cold and heavy against his fingers.

“It’s just water,” Luhan said. “I didn’t poison it or anything.”

Sehun stared at the glass and the water inside it. “Hyung,” he said.

Luhan said nothing.

“Hyung,” he repeated. From his point of view, he could see Luhan’s fist clench then unclench on his lap. “I’m really sorry,” he whispered.

He heard Luhan sigh. “Don’t say anything.”

“But hyung-”

“Sehun. Just listen to me for once and drink the goddamn water.”

That shut him up. Sehun brought the glass to his lips and took a sip. The throbbing, painful feeling in his head didn’t lessen, but it made him feel more awake. “Can you come home with me? Please?”

“We’re not having this conversation right now, Sehun. Later, tell me later.” With that, Luhan stood up and left the room. 

Sehun stared at Luhan’s back for a second before the door clicked closed. Sehun played with the thin blanket covering his body and sighed. Why was everything so complicated?

~OoO~

“Just forgive him. He came all the way there for you. Doesn’t that prove something?” Minseok said.

“That he’s an idiot who doesn’t know when to give me space?”

“No! That he actually cares for you, stupid.”

Luhan pinched the bridge of his nose. “I told him I wanted space. I told him I wanted to think everything over,” he reasoned.

“But it was too long. You’ve left for almost a month, Luhan. That’s too long.”

“He left me for a year without an explanation. Don’t you think that was too long?” Luhan retorted. Minseok was silent. “I’m hanging up. Thanks for checking up on me though.”

“Luha-”

Luhan turned his phone off and tossed it on the cushion next to him. He buried his face in a pillow and moved from his sitting position so that he was lying down. He shifted to his side and then moved the pillow to his chest, where he squeezed the life out of it.

Everything was so stressful.

Luhan didn’t even know what to do anymore. Everything he did was met with a roadblock, which was always Sehun. Sehun always stopped him from doing things (like moving on for example). He was still lost in his thoughts when the front door opened and a disgruntled Yifan stepped in.

“What happened?” Luhan mumbled. He sat up and made space for Yifan.

“Work happened,” Yifan replied. He rubbed his tired face with his hands and leaned back on the couch. “Ugh, I’m so tired.” One hand loosened his tie while the other one fished Yifan’s phone from his pocket. “Where’s Zitao?”

Luhan shrugged. “He said he went out.”

Yifan nodded and then tossed his phone on the coffee table in annoyance. “Make up with Sehun yet?”

Luhan sat in silence. “We didn’t talk much yet. He’s still sleeping.”

“Oh.”

Luhan felt a tinge of disappointment. For some weird reason, he kind of wanted Yifan to tell him to forgive Sehun. Maybe it was because it was Yifan, the one person he could trust with anything and everything. “That’s it?” he mumbled.

“What do you want me to say then, Han?” Yifan turned his body so that he was facing Luhan. Luhan curled up into a ball and stared at the black screen of the TV, hugging the pillow to his chest. “Do you want me to say, ‘Forgive him’? Is that what you want?”

Luhan let out a shaky breath and closed his eyes. His hold around the throw pillow tightened. “I don’t know. Maybe...”

“Really Han?” Yifan sounded a bit disappointed. Luhan shook his head and let out another breath.

“I don’t know. I want to forgive him, I really do. I-I just thought that by having you say it...it would...” Luhan trailed off.

“You thought that by having me say it, you could have something to hide behind if you got hurt again.” Luhan felt Yifan’s hand on his leg. “I know you, Han. I’ve known you since we were children.”

“Then you know why I act like this.”

“No, I don’t. I know the way you act, but I don’t why you act that way. I know that you would jump in front of a moving train for Sehun, but I don’t know why. Is it because you love him? You seem to hate him now, but you still would sacrifice yourself for him.” There was a moment of silence. Luhan let the words sink into his skin. He confused himself too. Sometimes his actions were just instinctive. They just happened.

“Do you love him?”

Luhan opened his eyes at Yifan’s words.

“I don’t-”

“It’s a yes or no question, Han.”

“N...”

“Say it, Luhan.”

“N...yes.”

The dam broke and tears flowed.

~OoO~

Sehun felt the bed dip beside him and the blanket being lifted off his body.

“Luhan?” he asked, his voice a raspy whisper.

“Yea.”

Luhan settled down next to Sehun’s body. Sehun froze. He scooted over to give Luhan space but ended up being pulled back to the middle.

“I-I need go back to my hotel. I feel a lot better now.” There was so much awkwardness surrounding them, and Sehun felt the need to leave. He could tell there was something wrong with the way Luhan was acting, but he just couldn’t pinpoint what. Sehun lifted the blanket and put his feet back on the floor, but felt a hand tug on his shirt.

“Stay.” Luhan’s voice was a near-whisper and Sehun barely caught it.

“What?”

“Stay.” Luhan tugged harder on Sehun’s shirt and pulled him back to lie down. “Don’t leave.” Sehun felt Luhan’s arms snake under his neck and across his chest to wrap around his body. “Please don’t leave.” Sehun was a stiff as a board. Luhan’s awkward hug with him emanated another feeling. It wasn’t pain, it wasn’t hatred. It seemed desperate.

Sehun could feel Luhan’s soft breath on his collarbone and he shivered despite the heat they shared. A few minutes later, when he was sure Luhan had fallen asleep, he began to untangle himself from the mess of limbs. He was wrong. Luhan’s grip on his shirt tightened and Luhan’s eyes opened.

“I told you to stay.”

“I-I..”

“I’m giving you another chance. You’re not taking it?”

Sehun was at a loss of words. “You’re what?”

“I’m giving you one last chance. One more. That’s it. If you screw this up, I’m leaving you for sure...”

Sehun stared at Luhan’s figure in awe before smiling and lying back down on the bed beside Luhan. They became a tangle on limbs again as they kissed and hugged as if it were the last day on Earth.

“I love you,” Sehun mumbled into Luhan’s lips. He felt Luhan tense up beneath him and he pulled away, apologizing.

“No. It’s fine.” Luhan wrapped his arms around Sehun’s neck and pulled him back down again. “I love you too.” 

Sorry that took forever. 

And I'd like to address EXO's current status, with Luhan leaving and all. I just want to tell you that I'm not going to stop writing HunHan. Is there a reason to? Is there a reason why I shouldn't include him and Kris in my stories. When we think of EXO we think of OT12 don't we? That's what a true EXO-L would think. Don't hate. Don't bash. They all have their own reason for leaving. They're humans too, and all humans are selfish. I'm not calling them selfish, but I'm saying that they need to think about themselves before others because it's their life. If they're not living it the way they want to, so be it. I'll accept that. I won't beg them to come back because I know they're happier this way. 

That's it. Thanks for listening to my rant. Feel free to message me about anything, whether it's about my stories or about life or just to spaz. I'll read and reply to every single one of you. Much love~