Chapter 39

He held tightly onto her hands, though gently not to hurt her even more. It wasn’t a miracle; it was yet more than a miracle. Despite what she had said, she had made it through & had slept for eight days. The ambulance & police had arrived before her breath ran out of her. The house had collapsed, burying Kyuhyun’s body beneath the ashes. Yoona had was to be incinerate in a week. Her ashes would be let free by the beach she loved.

Everything had been explained to the police. They were so glad Kyuhyun had finally been killed but right now, he only cares about the person lying on the bed halfway to death. He looked up, pressing her fist to his lips. His other arm was wrapped around a cast from the hit of the bullet. She looked too pale. The pigtail he had braided with the help of her nurse lay on her right shoulder. He closed his eyes, pressing her hands to his left cheek. Her parents weren’t too happy but they went with the doctor’s words.

“She’s a lucky woman.” The doctor had said, “The bullet had hit inch above her heart. She would survive but we found something wrong. We contacted her doctor, finding out that she has lung cancer. It had already spread throughout her lungs & next, it will go her heart. It’s only a miracle that she had survived. To say the least, she had only less than two months left but after the bullet, it’s impossible to know how much time she has left. We were able to find blood for her but it’s the strength she needs.”

Jaejoong sighed, raking his hair back. What was the doctor talking about? She has enough strength. She’s a tough woman. It’s impossible for her to fail & it’s impossible for her not to love him. She had kissed him back, not wanting to let him go. It just can’t be true. Why was she still holding back? She didn’t need to hold back anymore. It’s all over. Everything had been solved. He just wanted her commitment. He just wanted to spend his time with her.

Unfolding his fingers around her hand, Jaejoong opened her fingers & placed his adjacent to hers. He mumbled under his breath, tickling her fingertips with his, “Fany.” He felt something tingling around his fingers.

“Please wake up.” Her fingers slipped, gasping a hold onto his hand. Jaejoong opened his eyes, looking up at her. Her eyelids twitched. His heart leaped forward, “Fany.” She furrowed her brows, turning her head as if in pain. He stood up from his chair, cupping her face into his palm. tightened as she swallowed & slowly, she opened her eyes against the bright light coming in from the window.

He smiled, raising his brows, “You made it.”

She blinked, “Jae Oppa? Wha...What am I doing here? Where am I?”

“You’re at the hospital.” He replied calmly, brushing her hair back, “How do you feel?”

Tiffany shifted her position, making a face in return as pain shot through her body. She shut her eyes, “I don’t know.”

“Fany.” Jaejoong whispered, taking her hand in his. She opened his eyes at the smoothness of his voice. He smiled lightly against his distasteful look, “How do you really feel? Tell me the truth please. You’re holding everything back, I know it.”

She looked him in the eyes, eyebrows furrowed. The corner of her lips tilted up uneasily. Looking down, she whispered, “I wasn’t supposed to survive that shot, Oppa. I told you, didn’t I? I had been shot more than once & I...I.” She looked away, looking lost for some reason.

He grimaced, “Why didn’t you tell me?” Tiffany gazed back at him, eyes questioning. He sighed with a swallow, “Don’t look so lost, Fany. Why didn’t you tell me? Why didn’t you tell me that...that you.” He trailed off, eyebrows sinking together & looked away. Not now, not while he wanted to be with her after trying so many times. She didn’t want him to know about it but he knew without her consent. To spend his time with her happily, to love her & to be hers only were his only goals now. To tell her that he knows about her lung cancer would only ruin it all. She would turn away & avoid him like she had done in the past few days. He didn’t want that. Not now. Only when she’s ready to tell him herself.

Jaejoong looked up, the fake smile back on his face. He tilted his head, “Why didn’t you tell me you were going to meet him? It would have been much safer.” He saw that relieved face. The only thing he couldn’t understand was why she was still scared of him knowing. She knows she can’t avoid him.

“Oh, I...I told you I work alone, didn’t I?” Tiffany looked away nervously & caught the cast around his left arm. Not looking up at him, she said sluggishly, “You shouldn’t have come.”

“& let that bastard you?!” The moment he said that, a sharp pain slapped him from the inside. He cursed inwardly, gritting his teeth from his stupid action! He can see the redness climbing up her cheeks. To say it more, he liked her paled face from earlier better, “I was only worry about you.” He shut his eyes briefly.

“I’m sorry, Fany. I didn’t mean to say that. If anything happens to you, it would be all my fault because I didn’t look after you closely.”

Tiffany blinked gradually, “I’m not a baby, Oppa.” Her eyes glinted, “If I haven’t thank you enough, I should have died as one.”

He narrowed his eyes at her, really regretting what he had said, “Don’t be silly. What are you talking about? You thanked me enough for surviving. I wouldn’t want anything else but you in return.” He looked down.

“& I guess I should have been there for Hannie, too, huh? You could blame me on that.”

“I don’t blame you for anything, Oppa.” She bit her lips, sitting up. Alarmed, he reached out to stop her, hurting himself on the arm. She bit back the agony, “What happened to Stephanie wasn’t anybody’s fault. You weren’t there at the time that’s all but the baby was yours. You were the father.”

“I know.” He whispered. A silence fell in. He looked at her. She seemed too quiet, too alone. He soothed her hand with his thumb, catching her attention once again. He looked into her eyes, finding what he had wanted a long time ago, “Fany, I love you.”

She kept eye contact with him, soon to tear away, “We can’t, Oppa.”

“Of course we can. I don’t see anything wrong with it, Fany. It’s…”

“Please just stop it. I know nothing’s wrong with it. It...It’s just me. I just can’t, Oppa.”

“You’re lying again. I can see it in your eyes. I can hear it in your words. You know you’re hurting yourself further on if you don’t admit it. Please just think it over again.”

Her shoulders sunk. She gulped lifelessly, “Why should I think it over when I know my answer already, Oppa?”

“Because I’m letting you.” He replied softly.

Tiffany looked up as a knock came at the door. Jaejoong followed her gaze. Gradually, a small smile appeared on her face as her father poked his head in. He looked relieved, opening the door wider & turned around.

“She’s awake, Ae Cha.” A little gasps then Mr. Hwang was pushed to the side. Her mother made her way over, suddenly hugging her daughter.

Jaejoong pressed on a grin. He stood up, giving Mr. Hwang a greeting with a nod of his head. The man looked at his daughter & then back at him, “Thank you for staying here with Tiffany. You look like you need some rest.”

“I’m was just about to go take one.”

“Thank you again.”

Jaejoong nodded his head as the man walked pass him. He looked down at the ground hesitantly. Feeling her gaze on his back, he turned around. His eyes met hers as she looked at him over her father’s shoulder. Those deep, wondering eyes looked lost; & somehow, he can sense her wanting him to stay. He didn’t want to leave; he wasn’t tired but he had, too. Tilting up the corner of his lips & giving her a small nod, Jaejoong turned around, walking out of the room.

He let out a deep sigh, closing the door. Yunho & Yuri walked down the hall. It was a surprise to him after all. Yunho was back to himself, however, not quite with the women. He liked the change. It suited him more, “Hi, Jae.”

“Hi, Yuri, Yun. Fany’s awake. Mr. & Mrs. Hwang are in there.”

“Where are you going?” Yuri asked, taking a bite of her apple.

Jaejoong shrugged, “Home. Work.” He took a look at his fossil qualifier chronograph stainless steel watch.

“I have to go now. Bye.” Yuri flashed a quick smile, making her way past him. He looked at Yunho, “Good luck.”

“You, too.”

He took in another deep breath, alone again. Luck? No, he just needed the truth from her. Tucking his right hand into his pocket, he walked away, giving her the time she needed.

“Ti, what are you doing?!” Yuri gasped, running towards her.

Tiffany closed her eyes, hugging herself, not knowing where exactly the pain was coming from. As Yuri held onto her arms, she leaned half her weight on her instead of pushing away the help. Her body was leaning back against the bed before she felt another jabbing pain, “I need.” She took in a deep breath, “I need to dress, Yul.” “What do you mean you need to dress? You’re injured in the hospital, for god sake.”

The yelling swelled in her ear as she once again, closed her eyes tightly, “No, I can’t stay here. My parents are transferring me back home.”

“Why would…?”

“I pleaded them.” Tiffany looked up, eyes glimmering, “Look, just help me get my clothes.” Yuri narrowed her brows in concern. Tiffany sighed, “He’s unwilling to let me go, Yul. I...I don’t want to be the one hurting him when I’m gone. He’s too thick-headed.”

“You’re being one too, Ti.” The corner of Yuri’s mouth tilted up, unsatisfied “Had he...I mean, had you told him about your lung cancer?”

“It’s a fat chance I’m going to tell him, Yul. He’s going to follow me everywhere if he knows. I don’t know what had gotten into his head but I hate seeing him showing it.” Tiffany looked towards her clothes on the counter, “If you don’t want to help me, I’ll just go get…”

“I didn’t say that.” Yuri grimaced, walking to the counter, “Where’s your nurse?”

“I sent her off somewhere.”

“So you thought you can handle undressing yourself? My god, Ti, you were shot right above your heart. I don’t know how you can survive the pain.” She placed the clothes into Tiffany’s hand gently, “Are you sure you can get dress by yourself? I don’t want to see the doctor caging you up again.”

“Of course I can get dress by myself.” Tiffany stood up & walked behind the curtains with her friend’s help, “Are you going back with me?”

“Give me a reason why I won’t.” Yuri replied, leaning against the wall. She arched a brow to herself & then smiled slowly, “You love him, don’t you?”

She button up the white breezy tie lyza sleeveless shirt, an unwanted expression on her face. Tiffany soothed the wrinkles down with the palm of her hands slowly, staying quiet at the question. She bent down, picking up the gray platinum denim stone embellished pocket crop jeans. Her lips tightened as the wound loosened its healing on her chest.

“Ti?”

She took in a small hiss as her elbow hit her bruised knee, “Do you...Do you think that I’ve change?”

Yuri lowered her chin, looking down at her charles david apollo black pumps, “Well, as I have seen so far, yes, but.” She quickly added, “You’ve changed for the good.”

Somehow, Tiffany smiled, “So, you think I was bad back then?”

“No.” Yuri’s eyes widened, jumping forward, “I...I didn’t mean it like that. I meant...You know.”

“Yes, I know.” She pulled the curtains open. The smile from her face slowly disappeared. Yuri slowly raised her brows in question, “But I think this is the worst change that I had ever made. I’m used to the old, stubborn Tiffany, Yul. He knows that I’m changing. That’s the reason why he knows I have no chance arguing against his love.” She swallowed, “& I know that I’m not strong enough, too.”