Chapter 19

Kyungsoo started putting time aside for Krystal. When they were together she would usually teach him English phrases, sneaking shy kisses in between.

Chanyeol had been impressed with Kyungsoo's newfound English skills. They were having another of their rare jamming sessions in Chanyeol's basement.

"Omo. You've really improved Soo!" Chanyeol fondly patted Kyungsoo's back. "How in the hell did that happen?" He grinned at Kyungsoo's unnaturally, blank face. "I had some help..." He looked down to wipe off imaginary dust on his shoes. "From who?" Chanyeol already knew who, by the subtle smile Kyungsoo displayed. "Krystal is really good at English..." Chanyeol sighed at his best friend, putting down his guitar. "Kyungsoo. What is she to you?" "Kyungsoo crossed his arms.

"She's my girlfriend."

"Is she really?"

"Yes?"

"Do you love her? Because as far as I'm concerned, you don't really make the best boyfriend. Sorry."

Well that was a slap to the face. Kyungsoo stubbornly sat down on the cold cement floor.

"What the is that supposed to mean?"

"I just mean... Apart from being together, you don't seem to be that close."

Kyungsoo's wheels were turning. What Chanyeol had said didn't make much sense to him. Chanyeol, noticing his friend's clueless expression, shook his head.

"What is her favorite color?"

"It's...  I don't know."

"Her favorite food?"
"I don't know."

"When's her birthday?"

"..."
"See what I mean? You don't know anything about her. So ask yourself, do you really care?"

Kyungsoo thought about it for a moment.

"Does all that really matter? I mean, as long as I like her and she likes me, what else is there to know?"

Chanyeol didn't believe his own ears. He may never have been in a relationship himself, but he definitely wasn't as dense as his childhood friend.

"Just. If you really do care about her, you should probably start talking."

"We...talk..." Now that he thought about it he didn't really know anything about his girlfriend apart from the fact that she was from Canada, loved the piano and... had a nice smile? Kyungsoo had always chosen to look at the bigger picture instead of the smaller details. But after that particular conversation, the following morning, when Krystal exited her house, she was greeted by an eager Kyungsoo, asking her what her favorite color was.     

He learned all sorts of new things. Like the fact that her favorite color was, 'surprise', pink. Her favorite food was burritos and her blood type was A. All the way to school, Kyungsoo had kept asking her questions about herself. Krystal didn't mind though. It was nice that he finally seemed interested in getting to know her but also slightly disappointed that he didn't share much of himself.

At the age of 17, Kyungsoo and Krystal were still going strong. However, Krystal still didn't really know much about him. Whenever she would ask him a personal question, he would either brush it off or answer with a casual "I don't know". He wasn't aware that he did it or that he hurt her by not opening up to her. He was just being Kyungsoo.  

He knew so much about her, but when her friends asked about Kyungsoo, there was never much to tell. She cared so much about him but it was starting to get on her nerves.

They were lying on her bed, listening to music, entwining their fingers. Kyungsoo was content and happy with life. Breathing in Krystal's lemon scented shampoo, tracing her soft arm, he sighed happily.  

"Kyungsoo?" his name was whispered from Krystal's mouth against his chest.

"Mhm?" he hummed his reply, caressing her jaw with his index finger.

"I love you."

Hold up!

Kyungsoo's finger froze in its movement. His chest felt constricted and suddenly it was very difficult to breathe. Love? They had only dated for... 3 years... Wasn't it too early to love someone?

Krystal, sensing the panic radiating from Kyungsoo's rigid body, sat up. She had been ready to say those three words on the day he had carried her bag, reluctantly kept it in. Now she was not only disappointed but also angry.

"Really? It's been three years and you still can't say it?"

Kyungsoo swallowed. It wasn't that he didn't 'love' her. There were even times he had been close to spilling those words to her but to love someone out loud, terrified him. Kyungsoo shook away the image of his father that slowly but steadily was resurfacing in his mind.
"I like you. A lot." He didn't dare look her in the eye. A sinking feeling made his heart ache.

"But you don't love me." Krystal slipped off the bed, crossing her arms, hoping to God she wouldn't cry.

"I'm tired," her voice trembled."I'm so tired, of waiting for you to let me in. I love you but I can't keep doing this. Pretending like I'm okay not knowing anything about you. Kyungsoo. It is okay to be vulnerable."

Kyungsoo, still as a statue, opted to study his hands instead of Krystal's hurt look. A long silence spread throughout her small room.

"I'm sorry." Kyungsoo voice was barely over a whisper.

"Me too. " Kyungsoo dared looking up. He regretted it immediately. Krystal's tears made small rivers in her eyes, separating into small streams down her cheeks.
Kyungsoo jumped up at the sight of her crying, throwing his arms around her. Krystal would have none of that, effectively pushing him away. Not sure what to do, Kyungsoo tried approaching her again but was cut off mid-motion.     
"Please leave."

Unable to move, a taken aback Kyungsoo's heart dropped to his stomach.

"Krystal, I..."

"Go! Get out!"

Kyungsoo was gone in a matter of seconds.      


A/N
Okay so.... Kyungsoo's background story compared to Kris's, is going to be a tiny bit angsty. sorry about that but what you gonna do.

Anyway, I'm not really satisfied with the way things turn out from now on but hopefully it will be worth reading :)